Why didn't the parents hire someone to watch the children?

[kazzbar]

I don't think that the other poster meant to offend. I also think that most reasonable parents would not ever dream of leaving their children asleep in an unlocked apartment in a foreign country. The sad part to me is that people like the McCanns wouldn't dream of leaving their purse or wallet in an unlocked room, but would leave the kids there. Just like the people we saw leaving 4 year olds at a pool alone. That pretty much sums up where the "values" in situations like that reside.

I agree and think it is all nuts.I had my kids 13 months apart and would never go on holiday and leave them on there own anywhere...I just cannot believe the McCanns did this. I also cannot get over the fact that the British Press seem to be skirting round this issue...they should be charged with chjild neglect IMO.

 

[Brefie]

The parents didn't hire someone to watch the children because one of them was missing and they had a plan, IMO...could be wrong, at this moment, that's what I think.

God, I hope not. Right now, I do believe that you're wrong (in the most respectful way possible:blowkiss: ), but more than that, I PRAY that you are.

 

[Jeana (DP)]

Same for me too, I am 29. On summer break, I could be gone until dark (after dinner, not since morning). If I were a child now, I doubt I would be allowed out of the back yard...and only then because it was nearly impossible to get into if you didn't come through the house.
My mother was so afraid of everything that I never had a bike as a child. YET, I could be out of sight until it started to get dark. THAT for me is a huge testament to how times have REALLY changed. I don;t think there are more evil-doers, I just think they got brave.

29???? Twenty-Nine years old??? You're a baby!!!!! LOL I'm kidding. I never pictured you so young. You're very intelligent for being so young!!!!!
Did you ever get that bike????

 

[southcitymom]

I totally hear what you're saying.

What I see happening more and more with some people with kids is that the kids come along and are expected to ADAPT to the parents' lifestyle and not visa-versa. When you have kids, things CHANGE. You no longer have the freedom you did before and you have a lot more responsibility. I see more and more that people just expect the kids to fit into the lifestyle that existed before they came along, when (IMHO) it should be the other way around.

That's interesting, rmf. I believe the opposite - or maybe I am not reading your post right. I think parents must be the nucleus of the family and that kids must adapt to the adult's way of order. Hopefully, the adults in question are loving, caring and patient and have the family's best interest at heart.

That's not to say that things don't change dramatically when you have kids. They do and should. I'm not a fan of child-centered families because I don't think children have the experience, strength, maturity or wisdom to direct something as complicated as a family.

That said - wise, mature parents don't leave 3 children under the age of 3 alone in a hotel room while they go off eating and drinking.

 

[christine2448]

God, I hope not. Right now, I do believe that you're wrong (in the most respectful way possible:blowkiss: ), but more than that, I PRAY that you are.

Darlin', I hope I am wrong too! I don't think you know how much I hope I am wrong.

I hope it wasn't the parents...I also don't know if I'd rather her have a sedated death or be out there somewhere suffering who knows what?

:blowkiss: Right back atcha!

 

[southcitymom]

If you go back and read the early interviews with the McCanns, Kate repeatedly says that the resort felt so safe. It was family friendly and felt so "safe." Gerry says it was like dining in the garden (of your own home) they were so close to the room.

I have heard that they reportedly did not want to leave the children with strangers, but I have never actually read that in a direct quote from the McCanns. It could be there, I just haven't read it for myself yet.

I'm grateful we have the links that Colomom and others provided early on, because it's getting harder and harder to get to the actual news articles with so many blog opinions and forum opinions coming up on the searches.

http://news.scotsman.com/topics.cfm?tid=1590&id=1223682007

Here is one article that talks about how safe they felt.

One interesting thing that Kate says is, "I'm sure people will learn from our mistake, if you want to call it that."

When you see the picture of how far away the eating area was from the kids-in-room area (sherri posted a great view of this) what the McCanns say above doesn't pass the smell test. For me anyway.

 

[southcitymom]

Gotcha. You should know that I do not have children yet. Crap, I don't even have a job at the moment, so my fantasies of nannies and 2 vacations a year are just that - fantasies!! LOLOL....I think even we can crack a smile now and again.

Seriously, though, I do get that in my fantasy world, should the kids need me to stay home if they were sick or sad, I would not hesitate.

Quick, Brefie! Go on vacation now, alot, before you have kids!!! Of course, that might be tough without a job!

 

[concernedperson]

I just want to ask one question from my fellow sleuthers. Would you ever have left your toddlers alone to go out and eat dinner?

 

[mjak]

Maybe I'm old, but when I was growing up, if there was not an appropriate caregiver, the adults didn't GO. Again, I'm a relic so that may be why.

lol, your not a relic you just have a working brain. Child abandonment is not the new invogue child care method.

mjak

 

[Brefie]

29???? Twenty-Nine years old??? You're a baby!!!!! LOL I'm kidding. I never pictured you so young. You're very intelligent for being so young!!!!!
Did you ever get that bike????

hehehe :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :blowkiss: you are so cute, thanks for the compliments

I bought myself a $70 Kmart bike about 3 years ago, but I 'stored' it in front of my car in the back parking lot by the fence *thinking* no one would want a cheap . WRONGO!! Got stolen after about 2 months.

I have to say I learned to ride my cousin's bike when I was about 10, but, to truly answer your question, nope! My mother never gave in!!
I could never really understand my mom because I am the youngest of 8 (same parents for all) and SURELY you toughen up over time?? Haven't you seen enough split noggins to not panic so much?? I used to joke that when she went into labor with me she said, "Whose turn is it to walk me to the labor ward?"

 

[southcitymom]

I just want to ask one question from my fellow sleuthers. Would you ever have left your toddlers alone to go out and eat dinner?

No reasonable person would, IMHO, concerned. I give lots of leeway to parents and am a laidback parent myself, but I can't see any parent making that decision in any circumstance.

I've spent my share of evenings bored to death in a hotel room while my little ones slept and I'll bet I'm not the only parent here who has.

You get a good sitter or you don't go. There are NO other reasonable options with children that age.

 

[Jeana (DP)]

hehehe :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :blowkiss: :blowkiss: you are so cute, thanks for the compliments

I bought myself a $70 Kmart bike about 3 years ago, but I 'stored' it in front of my car in the back parking lot by the fence *thinking* no one would want a cheap . WRONGO!! Got stolen after about 2 months.

I have to say I learned to ride my cousin's bike when I was about 10, but, to truly answer your question, nope! My mother never gave in!!
I could never really understand my mom because I am the youngest of 8 (same parents for all) and SURELY you toughen up over time?? Haven't you seen enough split noggins to not panic so much?? I used to joke that when she went into labor with me she said, "Whose turn is it to walk me to the labor ward?"

I'm glad you got that bike and I hate to have to say this, but darlin if you can't leave a bike sitting out without worrying about someone taking it, then you SURE cannot leave kids alone without . . . well, you get the point!!

I've got to ask. Your parents are now grandparents, right? Have they changed any since they raised you? I mean insofar as how they treat the grandchildren?

 

[christine2448]

I just want to ask one question from my fellow sleuthers. Would you ever have left your toddlers alone to go out and eat dinner?

Never, I would have more fun with them there!

 

[teacherbees]

I have three children who are now 25, 22 and almost 16. (I had a stillborn son in between the last two.)

During all the time that I was (and am) raising my children, my husband and I did not have any family in the same town - or anywhere nearby. So, there was never an "easy" sitter on hand.

I can say, with absolute certainty and honesty, we NEVER EVER left our children alone to go eat out. I remember once going to a party at the neighbor's house across the street - in direct view of my house. But, even then I hired a sitter to watch my two children.

Leaving three children three and under alone is criminal, in my opinion. Kate and Gerry McCann are incredibly selfish people who appear to put their own good time over the safety and wellbeing of their precious children.

 

[mjak]

This past spring my sister and bil took their two boys to the Atlantis club in the bahamas. They also took my mom and I along to help and also to enjoy ourselves. My nephews are 9 &11 and never ever did we enteratin the idea of leaving them alone for a second. The apartment we stayed in was in a complex very similar to where the Mccaans stayed. The four adults all took turns watch the two children. Some nights we all went out for dinner other nights my mom and I took the boys to the restraunt by the apartment and my sister and bil went to town and had an adult night. We all went to the various pools and exhibits druing the day. We all took took turns caring for the boys. in the mornings I watched the boys and my sister and bIL went to the gym. The only explanation for why the mccaans left the babies alone is that t hey thought this was an acceptable childcare arrangment. The fact they would think this inspite of clearly having all the tools to know better dose not make them look to good.

mjak

 

[teacherbees]

Oh, and just so you don't think I'm doing a Gerry...we never left our children alone to go do ANYTHING when they were small.

One night, we had a medical emergency in the middle of the night. (Husband had severe food poisoning.) I called a neighbor who came to sit with our sleeping children while we went to Urgent Care.

It's what you do when you're a parent - look after your children.

 

[teacherbees]

We went to Europe when my youngest was eight years old. It was a family trip, celebrating my oldest son's graduation from high school. Of course, the older two kids had things they wanted to do and see that wouldn't have been appropriate or enjoyable for my youngest. So, we took my mother-in-law and, just as mjak expressed, we all took turns babysitting the youngest one. Part of the trip was on a cruise ship - even then we made sure he was with one of us at all times.

 

[Brefie]

I'm glad you got that bike and I hate to have to say this, but darlin if you can't leave a bike sitting out without worrying about someone taking it, then you SURE cannot leave kids alone without . . . well, you get the point!!

I've got to ask. Your parents are now grandparents, right? Have they changed any since they raised you? I mean insofar as how they treat the grandchildren?

Well, you know me well enough to know that my $70 bike was every bit as precious to me as a .....COME ON!!

Ha - they were grandparents when I was 7 months!!! (Nobody mention that!!)
My parents got very old, very quick. My father had a massive stroke 6 years ago and so they do not babysit their grandkids as they might have done. But, I gotta say no, before that, she seemed to be even more nervous with them!!

 

[concernedperson]

Oh, and just so you don't think I'm doing a Gerry...we never left our children alone to go do ANYTHING when they were small.

One night, we had a medical emergency in the middle of the night. (Husband had severe food poisoning.) I called a neighbor who came to sit with our sleeping children while we went to Urgent Care.

It's what you do when you're a parent - look after your children.

Absolutely! Most people would never, ever leave their children in any kind of an emergency. Much less to go out for dinner. I remember when the children were small and one was teething and the other had colic and I had been awake for 2 days that I couldn't go on anymore. I called my MIL and she came over then and watched us all sleep as they were as exhausted as me. LOL!

The point is children are a precious part of our lives and they deserve to be protected. We can never be so secure that their lives are lost because of our human foibles.

The McCanns do not fulfill the basic parenting skill.

 

[Brefie]

I just want to ask one question from my fellow sleuthers. Would you ever have left your toddlers alone to go out and eat dinner?

God, NO! Not in a million years!