2010.06.28 - Kyron's Dad files for divorce and restraining order

[DreamyEye]

For some reason I was able to download and read yesterday's motion filed by Kaine (which was moved to another thread), but my slow dialup will not complete the download of the OregonLive link that (I gather) transcripts some of the sexting between TH and MC. No matter--after reading some of the Websleuths posts by people who have read (or tried to read) them, I don't need to know any more of the gory details!

Earlier on this thread, some of us were saying that it seems unlikely that TH will actual get visitation with the daughter, and her lawyer would likely know how unlikely it is ... so why did the lawyer go along with filing this?

After reading Kaine's most recent volley, here's what jumped out at me: Could TH and her lawyer be using the visitation issue to seed a "not guilty by reason of insanity" defence in the event she's charged in Kyron's disappearance?

After all ... now she's getting into the legal record that her own husband regards her as unstable, unreliable, involved in serious, ongoing substance abuse, a hazard to her daughter, etc.

I wonder if they are trying to get into the record that TH is "insane," but without having to make themselves vulnerable (for now) to court-appointed experts. ???

MOO

 

[SurfieTX]

What I am going to say is my thoughts so no link. KH is trying to blend both of the cases, Kyron missing and the divorce. The papers, whomever did them were hastily prepared it seems and ooze with one sided hearsay. If you read between the lines the anger comes out with each new paragraph. KH is so stressed out and needs help badly, it is apparent in his court papers, and understandably so with a missing son to worry about. These judges who said KH has probable cause where Kyron is concerned might have been speaking off the record and might not sign papers as to their opinion of this case. With all the gossip surrounding this case, pills, drunkenness, etc I wonder how many of these well meaning friends who offered up these episodes will be willing to sign affidavits swearing to the effect that THs parenting skills were lax and the tales are actually true. The court will also wonder if TH was doing all these things she is accused of why did KH trust her to raise the kids. The judge will look over the text's but they were sent after KH moved out of the family home and let's face it, judges have sex lives too so no matter that they were rather raunchy on THs part they too are hearsay. In fact most of what is in the papers seems to be hearsay. TH will likely get visitation with her baby and KH will hopefully get some expert help. All this bickering back and forth is not helping to bring Kyron home. MOO

It's important to keep in mind that a LOT of divorces are messy, ugly, gossip-laden and full of hearsay, he said, she said, bullschnit. I can't really blame Kaine for using the divorce hearings to get Terri to speak about Kyron. I would too if I were in his shoes.

 

[cluciano63]

It's important to keep in mind that a LOT of divorces are messy, ugly, gossip-laden and full of hearsay, he said, she said, bullschnit. I can't really blame Kaine for using the divorce hearings to get Terri to speak about Kyron. I would too if I were in his shoes.

But why would he think it would work? Why would anybody think that? No one is going to admit to murder or kidnapping just because their sex life is outed...

I think any chance, if there ever was one, of TH speaking out, is totally gone.

 

[SurfieTX]

But why would he think it would work? Why would anybody think that? No one is going to admit to murder or kidnapping just because their sex life is outed...

I think any chance, if there ever was one, of TH speaking out, is totally gone.

Not sure...nothing ventured, nothing gained?

 

[curiousgirl2010]

I have a very personal view on this whole situation.

When I was a child, my mom was addicted to drugs AND alcohol. My dad had a very demanding job and had to deal with taking care of my baby sister and I and deal with my mom.

I was 10 years old when I saw a plate of cocacine on my mother's room. My father had to travel for work sometimes and he did leave my sister and I on my mother's and nanny's care.

My father was abused by my mom for years. She would hit him, scream... make his life a living hell. I remember she would get my father's contracts or important papers from work and cut it in a million pieces. The paper of the job that was PAYING for her addiction.

I mean, talk about a living hell for my dad. Still, he was unable to leave her. My dad and mom had known eachother since they were kids, and he felt completely responsible for taking care of her. He could NOT leave her. He believed that moving out with my sister and I and getting a divorce would kill her. And it would have.

Because whenever she had a few good months, or weeks, we were a happy family. And my dad loved my mom.

I mean, in retrospect, it was probably crazy of my dad to leave my sister and I on the care of my mom, but what was his other option? Leave her to die of an addiction? Leave the love of his life and mother of his children to rot on the streets?

My dad and I were sure the situation could end in disaster. My mother never tried to harm my sister or I, but I slept everyday believing that she could or would kill herself - or murder my dad. And she almost did both - many times.

It's way too hard to blame people who are dealing with domestic violence. There's just no right answer. Luckily, my mom isn't a criminal, but simply extremely mentally ill. That's the difference I see with Terri. My mom could probably had killed my dad in one of her attacks. But as soon as the drug/alcohol was out of her system, she would cry and beg for forgiveness. Terri Horman didn't impulsively kill Kyron because she was drunk. She planned, premitaded and is still hiding whatever she did. That's what make her a criminal and not just someone who's mentally ill.

Still, Kaine could never have known. My father could never have known what he was getting himself into when he married my mom. And both men had no idea what to do, how to get themselves out of this situation. I lived it. It really is almost impossible to get out of it.

My father finally did, after 16 years of marriage, and my whole family is alive and well. But really, if something had happened to my sister and I, it wouldn't have been his fault.

Life just hands us some impossible situations sometimes and it looks very easy to judge when you are not living it.

Kaine is NOT to blame for Kyron's disappearance. He is a victim and he is trying to make amends for his shortcoming. Kaine is human. Terri, on the other hand, I'm not so sure.

 

[cluciano63]

I hope Desiree is not just learning that Terri was an alcoholic who regularly drove her child around and had charge of him much of the time.

 

[citigirl]

I
I mean, in retrospect, it was probably crazy of my dad to leave my sister and I on the care of my mom, but what was his other option? Leave her to die of an addiction? Leave the love of his life and mother of his children to rot on the streets?

That is a sad story, curiousgirl--I'm glad things are better for you now. But BBM--Desiree was the other option for Kyron....:-(

 

[Chablis]

I hope Desiree is not just learning that Terri was an alcoholic who regularly drove her child around and had charge of him much of the time.

Do you know for sure she was drinking and driving with Kyron in the car?

 

[cluciano63]

Do you know for sure she was drinking and driving with Kyron in the car?

I did not say that she did...

 

[Trt]

Thank you for that insight curiousgirl. Let us also not forget that Terri had recently had her teacher's license reinstated by the Oregon Public School system. Sometimes people just fool people and it's not until you look at all of your info in totalility and in hindsight that you see that you've been had. Jmo

 

[ami]

So Kaine is contradicting himself. That's interesting. Seems a bit like he's altering facts in order to make his version of the truth mesh better.

No argument that Terri's sexting was gross & really inappropriate under the circumstances, but Kaine's changing his story doesn't make him look good, either, and I'm not impressed with a man who says he was equally responsible for raising his baby, yet that child had no schedule & was not treated properly. It's wrong for Kaine to place all the blame for bad parenting on Terri while simultaneously taking all the credit for anything that was done right.

Also, the sexting seemed really contrived to me on the part of Michael Cook ~ like he was trying to get information/set her up and Terri didn't "bite" because she was too focused on the sexual stuff.

I still don't see where Kaine contradicted himself. He was clearly uncomfortable revealing information when asked directly if Terri was still drinking recently. Maybe he was asked by LE not to mention his own evidence re: Terri at that time. He acknowledged the stuff on public record (DUI). He then started a sentence by saying it was his own speculation... and then went on to talk about things his friends told him re: Terri's drinking of their alcohol on the sly. His friends disclosures were not Kaine's "speculation", therefore he stopped himself from saying what he considered saying at the beginning of the sentence.

I don't see that as contradictory - I see that as someone who did not reveal several facts of the case in their complete form to the media. And since this is also LE's MO (not revealing all the facts), I can't see how it deviates from any other information transfer in this case.

 

[Marcusdog]

It's important to keep in mind that a LOT of divorces are messy, ugly, gossip-laden and full of hearsay, he said, she said, bullschnit. I can't really blame Kaine for using the divorce hearings to get Terri to speak about Kyron. I would too if I were in his shoes.

Absolutely, I wholeheartedly agree with you, I was merely tossing out a few thoughts that entered my mind since KH filed the new custody papers.

 

[Marcusdog]

But why would he think it would work? Why would anybody think that? No one is going to admit to murder or kidnapping just because their sex life is outed...

I think any chance, if there ever was one, of TH speaking out, is totally gone.

I think that thie idea of TH speaking out disappeared long ago too. I also wonder, although it has nothing to do with your post if Ths lawyer is collecting bits and pieces of hearsay that KH has made public so far to use later. Notice that bio Mom has stayed quiet of late. Another thing to think about is who gave KH the text documents to publish? If it was LE then I think there might be a rocky road ahead for this LE. As for her mental state and trying to use it as an insanity plea, I have no doubt that the person who took Kyron knew exactly what they were doing. That will not fly as a jury would see through that in a nano second. MOO

 

[stmarysmead]

But why would he think it would work? Why would anybody think that? No one is going to admit to murder or kidnapping just because their sex life is outed...

I think any chance, if there ever was one, of TH speaking out, is totally gone.

But it is not Terri's sex life that is important here...that has been "outed." The real shock here is not the sexual behavior...but the context wherein it occurred.

We can learn from these texts that Terri is reckless...flagrantly pursuing a man sexually while she very well knows she is under police observation. We can learn she is devious...lying to her own attorneys and asking others to do so as well. We can learn she has a sense of entitlement...bragging about her expensive attorneys fees ...but as an unemployed woman with no assets apparently of her own, nonchalant yet CERTAIN she can pay them. We can learn Terri is far from consumed with her missing stepson or recently removed Baby Daughter...she is consumed with her own physical needs. We can learn Terri sees sex as power, manipulation, not an act of mutual love.

We see the extremes that comprise the mindset of Terri Horman...and the absence of empathy and motherly grief.

These texts are invaluable as teaching toools about Terri. They are about SO much more than sex.

Whether she ever talks or not...it is important for the public to divest themselves of the Facebook Terri false image. She needed to be outed for who and what she is...so that any hope she clings to...of succeeding in avoiding punishment...becomes less a possibility to her. Maybe then, she will tell us what she did to Kyron.

 

[Chablis]

But it is not Terri's sex life that is important here...that has been "outed." The real shock here is not the sexual behavior...but the context wherein it occurred.

We can learn from these texts that Terri is reckless...flagrantly pursuing a man sexually while she very well knows she is under police observation. We can learn she is devious...lying to her own attorneys and asking others to do so as well. We can learn she has a sense of entitlement...bragging about her expensive attorneys fees ...but as an unemployed woman with no assets apparently of her own, nonchalant yet CERTAIN she can pay them. We can learn Terri is far from consumed with her missing stepson or recently removed Baby Daughter...she is consumed with her own physical needs. We can learn Terri sees sex as power, manipulation, not an act of mutual love.

We see the extremes that comprise the mindset of Terri Horman...and the absence of empathy and motherly grief.

These texts are invaluable as teaching toools about Terri. They are about SO much more than sex.

Whether she ever talks or not...it is important for the public to divest themselves of the Facebook Terri false image. She needed to be outed for who and what she is...so that any hope she clings to...of succeeding in avoiding punishment...becomes less a possibility to her. Maybe then, she will tell us what she did to Kyron.

This person knows that she is under police surveillance and she takes pictures of her nipples and whatever else parts, knowing the LE will see them, and she just does not care! Like this is some game to her, in her mind she probably thinks these cops want to see these parts of her, like shes the star and they are keeping track of her because shes famous, and not a suspect in what happened to a missing child!

There is something really wrong with her.

 

[believe09]

I guess a judge could look at it that way, though I could also see how a judge would say that having sex with another adult has nothing to do with how much you miss your children. IDK, but my real question is why they determined it was necessary to release this garbage to the public. Is that standard procedure?

For who to release it? For media to request it under FOIA and for them to release it to the public?

I suppose if Bunch or Houze had gotten wind of the request, they might have filed something to seal the response.

 

[Shadowboy]

In re-reading yesterday's filing, I noticed this:

"16. As noted above, I obtained a restraining order on June 28, 2010. Respondent's
behavior following her removal from our home and separation from K are highly unusual and suspect. In my opinion, Respondent's subsequent acts reveal extreme emotional disturbance and provide insight into the motives behind Kyron's disappearance."

BBM

Just interesting, IMO.

 

[Emma Peel]

d-i-v-o-r-c-e.

when I said "game on!" (waaaaaaaay back in this thread), I was thinking divorce.

And so, this is the stuff (exception of the Kyron allegations) of a nasty divorce. You want sole custody? Gotta come out guns-a-blazin'. Here, the marriage dissolution itself is uncontested. But not the custody issues. And ... we'll see about property...

so...the motions are doing what divorce motions do. Request/response/support/rebuttal...and so on...

Kaine wants sole custody and no visitation. Not that I blame him. He's providing his reasons for keeping the baby away from her mother forever. He's attesting to whatever bad behavior from Terri that he honestly can now to sway the judge. He's painting her character as horribly as he possibly can. I'd expect his affidavit to describe Terri on her very worst day ever. That's what happens. It should be a seriously ugly picture to warrant no visitation for one of the parents.

(When Kaine needed police/media to help find Kyron, it was of no benefit to paint such a picture of Terri. Kaine's job was to keep the media on Kyron's side, and to keep encouraging Terri to cooperate. Kaine quite possibly hadn't quite understood Terri's capacity for evil until the MFH and sexting shenanigans were disclosed. He likely only knew his marriage was troubled, and Terri was depressed...for whatever reason...one can see how he didn't connect those things to Kyron early on.)

I do wonder if Terri will now counter with affadavit/response about Kaine's allegations and/or Kaine's fitness for parenting and/or Kaine's marital indiscretions - to even up the "what a crappy parent" score.

I wonder if Terri's counsel has or will subpoena records of all of Kaine's texts?

:waitasec:

...this is how I've seen it play out with others' nasty divorces...tit 4 tat...until the judge throws up their hands and says "okay you're both equally awful parents so you're going to have to figure out a way to share custody and the only ones I pity are your kids". (or whatever.)...

It's been interesting to me that Terri didn't contest the divorce at all. Perhaps from her point of view, the marriage had long been over.

 

[cluciano63]

I think Kaine will get his divorce and sole custody.

I do not think he or anyone else will ever get Terri to tell what she knows about Kyron.

 

[Billylee]

In re-reading yesterday's filing, I noticed this:

"16. As noted above, I obtained a restraining order on June 28, 2010. Respondent's
behavior following her removal from our home and separation from K are highly unusual and suspect. In my opinion, Respondent's subsequent acts reveal extreme emotional disturbance and provide insight into the motives behind Kyron's disappearance."

BBM



Just interesting, IMO.

What's really further interesting about that statement, is it is referring to TH's behavior "after her removal from the home". I wonder what on earth Kaine is referring to? How does he know what her behavior has been since then? I wonder if they finally hired a PI?