Like the beloved person, storyteller he was, I think it's natural to search for answers in response to shock.
In an Op Ed piece for Penthouse Magazine, Leah McSweeney offers another view in her article titled Toxic Feminity. ---Definitely don't want to get in trouble for linking penthouse, but it's easy to look up.
Ok, so IMO, interesting piece, but what was even more telling was Bourdain's BFF chef's wife retweeted the article, and Bourdain's wife, replied to her with a heart emoji.
So the women who loved Bourdain may have some feelings about his final days, what he might have been going through, the choices he made, and are being discreet in their under the radar acknowledgements...
Bourdain was loved and admired by both men and women. My impression is that while he might have been spiraling in a depressive state, men and women process pride and humiliation differently. Or the harrowing bigness of choosing to end his life which only he really knows the answer to.
In my own search to understand him a bit better, I've come across a couple of interesting blogs, full of memories from The Ale House in Chicago, peeps, to a group that's been writing about him for years, and who he met as well, to a men's blog where they talk about the alpha/beta male energy. All interesting reading.
Bourdain himself wrote really gory crime novels, so understanding the occult, or historical references was not a stretch to his imagination. He even stretched it with culture and history in his shows. Like great writers, his was a fertile imagination.
I just think he might have been more traditional in his heart which was both protected, yet he explored something else which may have been more than he could handle?