Army Mom Refuses Deployment

[Kat]

I'll throw my two cents in:

There's more to this story than what this soldier is reporting as having happened. IMHO.

When a soldier has a baby, he/she is required to have a family care plan. There are regs that state how quickly that plan must be in place.

Prior to deployment, that soldier is required to submit that plan or an amended plan for the care of their dependent child(ren) to their Chain of Command.

Here is an example of what the DA form looks like but it could have been revised since this was posted online, I don't know:

http://www.armyg1.army.mil/dcs/docs/DA Form 5305 Family Care Plan.pdf


If you note on that form, it clearly states the possible consequences in the heading under "Disclosure" as seperation from the Military.

On a personal note I have seen many ( a great many) soldiers that were voluntarily seperated from service because they could not come up with a Family Care Plan.

I've never seen a military member disciplined for not being able to come up with one.

I think it's important to note that prior to deployment, these soldiers are given numerous briefings and screenings and at any time this soldier could have spoken up and shared her problem.

I don't know if she did or not.

I will say this, if her accusations are in fact true, someone in that Chain of Command is in deep Doo-Doo for lack of a better word. However, I am highly sceptical that a CDR or a 1st SGT would threaten to put this child in foster care and thereby potentially lose all of the years that they a have commited to their respective careers in the military.

Also, foster care isn't an option for a Family Care Plan. IMHO this young lady should be seperated from the military so that she can raise her child. I only say that, for the sake of the child.

I thank her for her service. I respect her for the sacrifices that she has made up until this time. It is time for her to move forward with her life there is nothing wrong with that.

I still think there is more to this story than she is telling.

 

[Salem]

Hi Kat! So good to see you back on the threads. Hope all is well with you and yours.

I see the Army is now refuting some of what this young mom has said. And it does appear that she was given additional time to come up with a new plan. I also agree that when she found that she could NOT provide an adequate plan for her child, she had a duty and responsibility to end her military service.

I really feel for her. She is only 21.

My son had to end his military career after 14 years because he could not provide an adequate family care plan. The children's mom is nuts and can not be counted on to care for the kids for any extended length of time. Weekend visits go okay 80-90% of the time. But it only takes one bad weekend

Because my son could not enforce provisions of his requested family care plan and the kids would have been left with their mother, he chose to leave the service. It was very sad and very hard for him to do. However, he was deployed as National Guard after 9/11 for 6 months. It was during that time that it was discovered the mom could not be trusted to care for the kids on her own.

Maybe that's why I feel badly for this young mom who has served her country and now finds herself between a rock and a hard place.

I do agree that she has duties and responsibilities to both her Country and her Child.

Salem

 

[Lyn1001]

Hi Kat! So good to see you back on the threads. Hope all is well with you and yours.

I see the Army is now refuting some of what this young mom has said. And it does appear that she was given additional time to come up with a new plan. I also agree that when she found that she could NOT provide an adequate plan for her child, she had a duty and responsibility to end her military service.

I really feel for her. She is only 21.

My son had to end his military career after 14 years because he could not provide an adequate family care plan. The children's mom is nuts and can not be counted on to care for the kids for any extended length of time. Weekend visits go okay 80-90% of the time. But it only takes one bad weekend

Because my son could not enforce provisions of his requested family care plan and the kids would have been left with their mother, he chose to leave the service. It was very sad and very hard for him to do. However, he was deployed as National Guard after 9/11 for 6 months. It was during that time that it was discovered the mom could not be trusted to care for the kids on her own.

Maybe that's why I feel badly for this young mom who has served her country and now finds herself between a rock and a hard place.

I do agree that she has duties and responsibilities to both her Country and her Child.

Salem

Salem ~ I know everyone has topics they feel strongly about and typically they have a reason behind it. Thank you for sharing your reasoning! I now have a better sense of why you feel the way you do on this issue. I cannot imagine how difficult it was for your son to give up his career and difficult position he was put in. I respect your son's decision and wish him the best of luck caring for his children.

 

[theforgotten]

I would really love to feel bad for this woman, but I wont. There is birth control in this country. She didn't have to become pregnant. A woman wants to be a mom or she doesn't. If she wanted to someday be a mom, maybe the military wasn't the best path for her then.

I'm sorry maybe I missed something, Were is the baby's father at? If he isn't being deployed can't he take care of the child?:twocents:

 

[MarleneM]

Here's a few things that come to mind for me with this topic:
:twocents:

SAILOR CHARGED IN BABY'S DEATH ; 11-MONTH-OLD ALLEGEDLY LEFT IN HOT CAR FOR SEVERAL HOURS
Aug 15, 2002 - Seaman Lateasha Moore, 20, of Norfolk, is accused of leaving 11- month-old Mikius Benjamin Moore in the car in the afternoon heat on July 27 while she went to work at Little Creek Naval Amphibious Base.
http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-90408756.html

BABY FOUND HOME ALONE; [NAVY] MOM ARRESTED, FATHER AT SEA
Stephanie K. Teixeira was placed in the Virginia Beach Correctional Center on a $5,000 bond. She is in the Navy and is stationed at Oceana Naval Air Station; police would not release her rank. Her husband, a petty officer in the Navy, could face similar charges when he returns home from deployment, police said.
http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-87095674.html

BEACH POLICE CHARGE NAVY MOTHER WITH CHILD NEGLECT
Investigators interviewed Tranate and learned that she had been leaving her son at home alone from 7:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. weekdays since June 14, Rimer said. Tranate is in the Navy and is stationed at Oceana Naval Air Station, Rimer said.
http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/dailypress/access/154683041.html?dids=154683041:154683041&FMT=ABS&FMTS=ABS:FT&type=current&date=Aug+22%2C+2002&author=The+Associated+Press&pub=Daily+Press&desc=OCEANA+MOTHER+HELD+IN+CHILD-NEGLECT+CASE+BOY%2C+6%2C+WAS+ALLEGEDLY+LEFT+ALONE+WEEKDAYS&pqatl=google

[NAVY] MOTHER FOUND GUILTY OF NEGLECT JUDGE CONVICTS 21-YEAR-OLD WHO ABANDONED NEWBORN
1.Judge Von L. Piersall Jr...sentenced James, a 21-year-old Navy woman, to a year in jail on the felony child neglect conviction. James was scared and alone last October when she left baby Anna Christine. She had no family here. The father of her child was overseas with the Marines, and he thought James had earlier miscarried the baby. James' own father lived out West.
2.When she learned she was pregnant last winter, Samantha Rosa James was not sure she wanted to live. Her mother had died of cancer. Her boyfriend was overseas with the Marines. She barely spoke with her father out West. And getting pregnant would make her feel ``cursed'' where she worked, in the Portsmouth Naval Medical Center's maternity ward, James told a detective in a videotaped interview last fall.
1.http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-99057863.html
2.http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-97294023.html

 

[oh_gal]

I support this young lady 100%. I don't know how she got pregnant or why - I don't care. It is all water under the bridge now and doesn't matter. This young woman can do all kinds of military work right here at home and look after the well-being of her child at the same time. She doesn't need to go overseas.

One of the hardest things for any parent to do, is leave their children for an extended period of time and it is IMPOSSIBLE if you do not have a safe and loving environment to place the child in while you are gone.

I send her lots of support and hope that she is not punished. She is doing the RIGHT thing by standing by her child - in my mind, there is no question about that.

Salem

I respectfully disagree. As my husband (military, retired) says, "We all had to do our time in the barrel."

There are many, many, many young mothers deployed. I'm sure they'd love to be home with their babies. But they're honorable.

(ETA: I've read your post above, Salem, regarding your son, and what he did was out of love for his children -- a totally selfless act. I feel that what this young woman did was selfish. On many levels. Big difference.)

 

[crystalgenie]

I was in the Navy so I won't speak for the Army but we used to deploy shipboard every 12 to 18 months. I have held the hands of fellow sailors ( mostly females) who have had to leave their babies for 6 to 7 months at a time and this is not counting work ups. Workups for sailors on ships, opposed to sailors on the airside, means doing donuts for up to 2 weeks at a time out in an ocean or gulf. There were always lots of tears and it was terribly painful.

Family plans can be a difficult thing. I know when I was in the Navy (My job was the equivalent of Human Resources) I dealt with family plans. I don't see how her mother could have been part of her family plan... The mother is the caretaker of what the Navy called an exceptional family member. When I was in you couldn't have someone like her mother as the caretaker for child. The mother has too much on her.

It has been my experience (and just my experience) that females generally make up their minds long before the deployment and start trying to get out of the military not just out of a deployment. I don't doubt the fact that some jerk did make a comment about sticking the child in foster care. You would be suprised at what all I have heard come out senior enlisted as well as officer's mouths. There was one senior enlisted on my last ship that made it clear that he believed women had no place in the military ( much less on ships) and he wasn't alone in his beliefs. Now mind you, at the time, the jerk had in 18 years in and alot to lose.


I say just discharge the girl under a "general discharge."

BTW before someone jumps on me. I loved being in the Navy but when I got pregnant I had no one for a family plan. My mother died unexpectedly 3 months before my little girl was born and my only sibling has an "exceptional family member", his daughter has cerebal palsy so I no choice but to get out. I am so glad that I had a great group of Navy people around me that didn't toss me out with a dishonorable discharge because I couldn't deploy!!!! I got out with a admin discharge under honorable conditions and still have all my Navy friends.

 

[Kat]

Hi Kat! So good to see you back on the threads. Hope all is well with you and yours.

I see the Army is now refuting some of what this young mom has said. And it does appear that she was given additional time to come up with a new plan. I also agree that when she found that she could NOT provide an adequate plan for her child, she had a duty and responsibility to end her military service.

I really feel for her. She is only 21.

My son had to end his military career after 14 years because he could not provide an adequate family care plan. The children's mom is nuts and can not be counted on to care for the kids for any extended length of time. Weekend visits go okay 80-90% of the time. But it only takes one bad weekend

Because my son could not enforce provisions of his requested family care plan and the kids would have been left with their mother, he chose to leave the service. It was very sad and very hard for him to do. However, he was deployed as National Guard after 9/11 for 6 months. It was during that time that it was discovered the mom could not be trusted to care for the kids on her own.

Maybe that's why I feel badly for this young mom who has served her country and now finds herself between a rock and a hard place.

I do agree that she has duties and responsibilities to both her Country and her Child.

Salem

Thanks Salem and it's good to see you too my dear. I'm sorry your Son had to seperate from serving because of not being able to get a good FCP that he felt comfortable with, it's important for him to take care of his children and I understand the reasons why he had to do so, Bless his heart.

As for this Mother, I will be very surprised if she has told all of the truth. I can't fathom that she would be facing jail time for not deploying if the only reason was her FCP and her inability to come up with one.

Letting her voluntarily seperate (which I think is more than likely is what is going to happen) is a win/win.

It's a win for her because she served our country, and she made sacrifices in order to do so, however now her priority has to be her child and as a soldier the mission has to always come first. So, she will probably be allowed to seperate with an honorable discharge (unless there is something she's not telling that would indicate otherwise), and be able to move forward with her life in the civilian sector.

It's a win for the military because in the current environment almost all soldiers need to be able to drill, train, and deploy to combat arenas or peace keeping missions and be able to keep their mind on their mission without the worry of a child being uncared for in the rear. That type of situation is not only dangerous for that soldier-forward it could be dangerous for the co-workers of that soldier. KWIM?

There is no shame in her not being able to find appropriate child care. There should be no shame for her as a single parent in choosing seperation from military service in order to care for her child.

Take care Salem!

 

[STEADFAST]

Oh, Salem! I feel for your son having to separate after 14 years in -- all that hard work and sacrifice and getting close to retirement pay. But I'm sure he did it correctly and didn't just not show up for a deployment like this woman did.

 

[Kat]

Oh one more thought that I had and before I sign off today I wanted to share it for consideration.

This Soldier had ample opportunity to share that she did not have a FCP prior to the flight for deployment.

She could have informed her Chain of Command at any of the briefings prior to deployment.

The day of the flight she could have picked up the phone and called her platoon SGT who would have sent that call up the chain of command pronto -trust me..lol.

If she was really treated and threatened with her child being placed in foster care I am willing to bet my bottom dollar that she knew this:
1. Whoever made the alleged threat, go to their immediate supervisor and lodge a complaint.
2. If you don't get an adequate response go up to that persons supervisor. Up to the level of Company CDR and 1 SGT.
3. Can't get anywhere with the Company level CDR? Go the the Battalion CDR...
4. Can't get anywhere with Battalion CDR? Go to Brigade CDR and on and on and on....

5. File an IG complaint.

6. File a complaint to begin a congressional investigation, that would really make some backsides pucker.

But yet, she chose not to get on the plane and chose to go to the media....hmmm :waitasec: I really think there is way more to this story than is being told...

 

[6angels]

The military ask single moms and dads to leave kids in Foster care all the time and guess what happens? Some of them children get ADOPTED out from foster care because the parents are not there to fight for them. Don't think it happens? IT DOES. I was a foster child and seen it I was a foster mom and seen it. Sad but True.

There is a lot of single parents in the service and by Gosh there is jobs right here in the USA they can do but no the service wants to send them over seas where they could lose the only parent they have. Guess what not every has family suporitt and sometimes you think you do only to find out you don't. This should not mean they shouldnt serve their county but it does mean The Military should find them jobs they can do in the USA. You can SERVE in the service without going to war and it's a shame people think your not serving unless you do so.

 

[STEADFAST]

Here's a few things that come to mind for me with this topic:
:twocents:

SAILOR CHARGED IN BABY'S DEATH ; 11-MONTH-OLD ALLEGEDLY LEFT IN HOT CAR FOR SEVERAL HOURS
Aug 15, 2002 - Seaman Lateasha Moore, 20, of Norfolk, is accused of leaving 11- month-old Mikius Benjamin Moore in the car in the afternoon heat on July 27 while she went to work at Little Creek Naval Amphibious Base.
http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-90408756.html

BABY FOUND HOME ALONE; [NAVY] MOM ARRESTED, FATHER AT SEA
Stephanie K. Teixeira was placed in the Virginia Beach Correctional Center on a $5,000 bond. She is in the Navy and is stationed at Oceana Naval Air Station; police would not release her rank. Her husband, a petty officer in the Navy, could face similar charges when he returns home from deployment, police said.
http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-87095674.html

BEACH POLICE CHARGE NAVY MOTHER WITH CHILD NEGLECT
Investigators interviewed Tranate and learned that she had been leaving her son at home alone from 7:30 a.m. to 3:30 p.m. weekdays since June 14, Rimer said. Tranate is in the Navy and is stationed at Oceana Naval Air Station, Rimer said.
http://pqasb.pqarchiver.com/dailypr...AS+ALLEGEDLY+LEFT+ALONE+WEEKDAYS&pqatl=google

[NAVY] MOTHER FOUND GUILTY OF NEGLECT JUDGE CONVICTS 21-YEAR-OLD WHO ABANDONED NEWBORN
1.Judge Von L. Piersall Jr...sentenced James, a 21-year-old Navy woman, to a year in jail on the felony child neglect conviction. James was scared and alone last October when she left baby Anna Christine. She had no family here. The father of her child was overseas with the Marines, and he thought James had earlier miscarried the baby. James' own father lived out West.
2.When she learned she was pregnant last winter, Samantha Rosa James was not sure she wanted to live. Her mother had died of cancer. Her boyfriend was overseas with the Marines. She barely spoke with her father out West. And getting pregnant would make her feel ``cursed'' where she worked, in the Portsmouth Naval Medical Center's maternity ward, James told a detective in a videotaped interview last fall.
1.http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-99057863.html
2.http://www.highbeam.com/doc/1G1-97294023.html

I never understand these cases considering there's plenty of low-cost child care facilities on bases. However, it does bring up something that I've always wondered. Why doesn't the military provide free child care for soldiers and their families? Seems like it would go a long way to raise morale in a stressful situation and protect the children of people who HAVE to go to work (and usually need the spouse to work, too, in order to provide.) At least free child care for E-1 to E-3 or 4, when most would be very young and getting little pay.

 

[Kat]

The military ask single moms and dads to leave kids in Foster care all the time and guess what happens? Some of them children get ADOPTED out from foster care because the parents are not there to fight for them. Don't think it happens? IT DOES. I was a foster child and seen it I was a foster mom and seen it. Sad but True.

There is a lot of single parents in the service and by Gosh there is jobs right here in the USA they can do but no the service wants to send them over seas where they could lose the only parent they have. Guess what not every has family suporitt and sometimes you think you do only to find out you don't. This should not mean they shouldnt serve their county but it does mean The Military should find them jobs they can do in the USA. You can SERVE in the service without going to war and it's a shame people think your not serving unless you do so.

6angels first let me say thank you for fostering children in need. That is commendable and you deserve a thank you!

I have to say though that you have been misinformed. The military never asks/or tells single parents to leave their children in foster care. I'm sure I can support that by regulation, give me some time.

 

[Kat]

The Army Regulation for FCP is AR 600-20, Ch. 5-5

http://www.army.mil/usapa/epubs/pdf/r600_20.pdf

beginning on page 44 on the PDF (not the numbered pages of the doc). It ends at the top of page 48.

A FCP is of utmost importance and there are strict procedures and regulations and rules that must be adhered to not only by the soldier creating the FCP for their child(ren) but by the Chain of Commands.

I had posted the DA form that is filled out by the soldier and maintained by the Chain of Command.

...The Army assists the Soldier in providing for the care of his or her Family members. Mission, readiness, and deployability needs especially affect Active Army (AA), Army National Guard, and USAR single parents and dual military couples with Family members. Plans must be made to ensure Family members are properly and adequately cared for when the Soldier is deployed, on temporary duty (TDY), or otherwise not available due to military requirements. Army National Guard and USAR Soldiers are subject to those policies and regulations, and will implement plans during any period of absence for annual training, regularly scheduled unit training assemblies, emergency mobilization and deployment, or other type of active duty. Emergency-essential civilians who meet the criteria set forth in paragraph 5-5 a are encouraged to have a Family Care Plan that follows the guidelines set forth in this regulation.
...

After refreshing my memory with the reg, she wasn't arrested for refusing deployment...I'll be willing to bet my bottom dollah on that one

 

[STEADFAST]

After refreshing my memory with the reg, she wasn't arrested for refusing deployment...I'll be willing to bet my bottom dollah on that one

She was arrested for not showing up to deploy. Big difference than refusing to deploy, going in and saying, "I can't deploy." It's called "missing movement," and it's addressed in the UCMJ.

[FONT=Verdana, Arial, Helvetica, sans-serif]Any person subject to this chapter who through neglect or design misses the movement of a ship, aircraft, or unit with which he is required in the course of duty to move shall be punished as a court-martial may direct. [/FONT]

From the first article linked on this thread:

An Army cook and single mom may face criminal charges after she skipped her deployment flight to Afghanistan

 

[mae]

The military ask single moms and dads to leave kids in Foster care all the time and guess what happens? Some of them children get ADOPTED out from foster care because the parents are not there to fight for them. Don't think it happens? IT DOES. I was a foster child and seen it I was a foster mom and seen it. Sad but True.

There is a lot of single parents in the service and by Gosh there is jobs right here in the USA they can do but no the service wants to send them over seas where they could lose the only parent they have. Guess what not every has family suporitt and sometimes you think you do only to find out you don't. This should not mean they shouldnt serve their county but it does mean The Military should find them jobs they can do in the USA. You can SERVE in the service without going to war and it's a shame people think your not serving unless you do so.

Exactly. On all accounts.

And children die in foster care. My parents are foster parents, and I still would be extremely hesitant to let my child enter foster care willingly. I cannot imagine being deployed and having my child into foster care. It would be horrible for morale.


And I love that people say that getting pregnant is a choice. Like all pregnancies are planned, birth control is 100% effective and accidents never happen. Having a baby is a choice, getting pregnant not so much. Chances are those same people would have judged her for having an abortion if she had chosen that route. Some people can never win.

 

[MarleneM]

6angels first let me say thank you for fostering children in need. That is commendable and you deserve a thank you!

I have to say though that you have been misinformed. The military never asks/or tells single parents to leave their children in foster care. I'm sure I can support that by regulation, give me some time.

Kat, I'm sure you won't find a reference to refute what 6angels has seen or heard regarding the military referring parents to the foster care system. There is nothing in writing, however the comments by senior enlisted and department heads to the single/dual military parents that cannot muster for work because of conflict with their family's needs (ie sick children, school/daycare hours et al) are commonly recited as: "Your kids didn't come in your seabag." or "You signed a family care plan." and "Either figure it out and get here by xx:xx, or be prepared to sign your report chit."

Successful military careerists are those with either the blessing and support of a stay-at-home spouse that manages their personal lives (home, kids, finances), or have no family obligations at all. Dual military, divorced and single parents face many hurdles and challenges in meeting both the long hours at work while then going home to be the head-of-household and often lone parent to their child(ren). The stress and obligation to both worlds often leads to cases of neglect or abuse in military children seen repeatedly every. year.

I agree the mother in this case should be separated on an adsep discharge. She'll have to find another way to support her family, but at least she'll be there for him as a mother. Risk of brig time is exactly what motivates military parents to leave their toddlers locked in a bedroom alone for days rather than tell their Supervisor they can not come into work because they can't find a suitable daycare provider. It is more common than anyone thinks, and it stems from fear of losing your livelihood or being otherwise punished because you eventually found yourself in the position of having to make a choice between taking care of your child and reporting for duty as ordered.

While 'missing movement' such as in this case is a much larger offense that begs the question of the amount of effort the mother put into planning for her deployment, there is a much higher frequency of military parents that are counseled and/or put on report for having to miss too many days of work/watches because of their obligation in their 'single-parent' role. I'd much rather read about this mother getting discharged and having to find another job in this economy, than to read her baby was sent into foster care while she sat in jail because she didn't want to leave him. I also wouldn't want to read another blurb about yet another military kid that died from neglect because their military parent couldn't find daycare to cover them in order to work the crazy hours and shifts (holidays/weekends included) the military throws at every member.

.

 

[crystalgenie]

http://usmilitary.about.com/od/punitivearticles/a/87.htm

I]UCMJ (Uniform Code of Military Justice) Article 87 - Missing Movement

(1) Movement. “Movement” as used in Article 87 includes a move, transfer, or shift of a ship, aircraft, or unit involving a substantial distance and period of time. Whether a particular movement is substantial is a question to be determined by the court-martial considering all the circumstances. Changes which do not constitute a “movement” include practice marches of a short duration with a return to the point of departure, and minor changes in location of ships, aircraft, or units, as when a ship is shifted from one berth to another in the same shipyard or harbor or when a unit is moved from one barracks to another on the same post. [/I]
(5) Actual knowledge. In order to be guilty of the offense, the accused must have actually known of the prospective movement that was missed. Knowledge of the exact hour or even of the exact date of the scheduled movement is not required. It is sufficient if the approximate date was known by the accused as long as there is a causal connection be-tween the conduct of the accused and the missing of the scheduled movement. Knowledge may be proved by circumstantial evidence.

(6) Proof of absence. That the accused actually missed the movement may be proved by documentary evidence, as by a proper entry in a log or a morning report. This fact may also be proved by the testimony of personnel of the ship, aircraft, or unit (or by other evidence) that the movement occurred at a certain time, together with evidence that the accused was physically elsewhere at that time.

You can and will be arrested for "missing movement". We had several of these cases while I was in. Ours were usually sailors out partying in a foreign port and not making it back before we pulled out of port.

 

[p7byrd]

The needs of the Army come first. Single parents with underage children don't belong in the service. Period. Give her a general discharge and a one-way ticket back home. Problem solved.

 

[MarleneM]

I'm actually guilty of missing movement once. I was new (like, just-reported-yesterday new), but I wasn't sent to mast because apparently nobody even noticed I was missing (through at least 4 separate musters..) until I flew myself cross-country and caught up to them at the ship that night. Looking back on it now I just think - whew!! That was close! :crazy: