Molly Dooker
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I find this to be an insightful post, thanks. My own thoughts differ slightly on this as I think that the CSK would never reveal himself to 'non-interested parties' under any circumstances as it would be an admission of guilt. As I said a couple pages earlier I speculate that if CGE was to have had any inklings of suspicion that it would have arisen from something she found, likely related to his computer setup, either particularly distressing *advertiser censored* or content relating to sexual violence, or perhaps something more relating to the CSK case. Like yourself I expect the accused to have been domestically abusive towards his partner (emotional, psychological, possibly physical and sexual) but I speculate that he would have been particularly controlling and intimidating around his computer setup because I believe that he would have been accessing all manner of *advertiser censored* online, including material only found on the dark web. While I don't think he'd ever admit guilt, I do thinks it's possible he might have anonymously disclosed or bragged about his 'achievements' to like-minded persons of similar persuasion in a secure online environment. I think it's not outside the realms of possibility that CGE would have been frightened of the accused in the relationship but followed her curiosity given his defensive and controlling behaviour ('stay away from my computer, it's very expensive', 'have you been in my computer room again, I thought I told you not to', 'you just don't seem to get it do you, I've told you it's very expensive but you just don't listen do you, what's it going to take, don't make me have to teach you') and explored his computer setup and found something salacious or suspicious. The sad thing about domestic violence is that all too often, even if the victim does disclose DV, the abuser (overwhelmingly men) has so carefully crafted a persona of good social and community reputation and is so good at manipulation and deflection that the victim is often not believed, even by friends and family ('Him? Surely not, he's a lovely man, he'd never hurt a fly, if anything I would think SHE was abusive, he's always told us how she treats him, we know she's a real handful, she's lucky to have him. Maybe she's not well. Poor man, being accused of this'.). It's not uncommon for women to present as highly dysregulated and anxious when disclosing DV because of the trauma experienced, so they may not be as 'together' at that time, so this can also contribute to not being believed. Sadly though, many women don't disclose anything because they are already so afraid and threats may have been made, but also because they know they won't be believed, or they don't want to 'ruin his life', or break up the family, or because DV behaviour often goes in cycles and they occasionally see glimpses of the man they fell in love with. People ignorant about DV will often say 'why doesn't she just leave?', not understanding all of these factors, that a women's confidence has often been completely ground down to almost nothing, and that abusive men's behaviour often seriously escalates when they sense a loss of control, and is actually one of the highest risk periods. So, if CGE did discover something, I think it would have taken her some time to put it together in her head, but as it did come together her fear would have only risen higher as she realised who and what she was dealing with, and she wouldn't just rush out and disclose her suspicions because there would be such a huge risk she wouldn't be believed; authorities have had so many calls of this nature over the years that they wouldn't even listen anymore, plus they would take one superficial look at the accused and say 'that man? You've got to be kidding right?', and they would more likely see a highly anxious, less together woman and say 'I think she maybe is the one with the problem'. If this was the case and the accused was made aware of her assertions against him, the risk for her returning home would have been astronomical as far as a further escalation of controlling and abusive behaviour.
This may read like fiction to some regarding this particular case, and of course is simply speculation. But the information regarding DV is, sadly, anything but.
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Thanks for your insights into DV, you may be on the money here. Where I don't feel I would agree is with the notion that CGE knew anything about any serious criminal behaviour on BRE's part. If she did have knowledge or even suspicions, I feel that once she had left the relationship she would have severed all ties (e.g FB friendship) and heavily discouraged her daughter from having ongoing contact.
I think that there could have been a mountain of more minor reasons why the relationship fell down. Not mowing the lawn would have been enough for me.
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