I don;t know either. I hope we will get to find out. I have three borderlines in my life (MIL, aunt by marriage and long time friend from childhood) and have come across about three more in my practice. Only one was into cutting that I am aware of. Three made suicide attempts or seriously threatened.
Not surprising (the attempted suicides and cutting) and I am sorry.
All have zero damn memory of the things they have done or things that occurred in the past. They completely remember them the wrong way.
This is SO true. And the nature of the absolute Mind**** that ensues on a constant basis.
Only a couple have been sexually promiscuous as most are supposed to be.
Meh...maybe to avoid abandonment in Borderline, but classically more of a mania symptom. People can have both Bipolar Disorder and Borderline Personality disorder, in fact, clinically they mimic each other upon first assessment and a differential dx needs to be made. MOO.
I think while some of that is common, none of it has to be there for the person to be diagnosed. For me, the constants are intense fear of abandonment that results, inexplicably, in crazy behaviors that ensure they will be abandoned - rages, pulling the person in and then shutting them out, intensive boundary crossing (like the allegation that LT picked the locks and watched her sister come out of the shower, if that allegation is to be believed) but extreme distress or rage if anyone ever tries to pry into their business, and then it's the idealization which swings to hatred.
Absolutely SPOT ON.
Only thing here is that I must have missed that and only understood the showering episodes to be DT not LT and DT. Correct me if I am wrong.
I could see some of that applying to LT. She idealizes her husband. Let's see if she turns on him.
This would be important to know, I agree, we just don't know enough yet here. To me they seem to be in absolute narcissistic "love" and bizarre adoration for each other, but that could be just for the cameras (Vegas), a facade, like everything else they ever showed the public. The power dynamics in their relationship are paramount to understand and I don't think we do yet. Her being raised Evangelical, and him, Pentecostal, makes me lean toward a patriarchal narrative in their marriage. But that is pure informed (lol) speculation.
She seems to maybe idealize her babies but then hates them as they age?
Agreed! Are they dolls? When they grow up does she become disinterested in dressing them up and playing with them? When they talk back or push back do they shake up her regressed narrative? She appears stuck in childhood as well. Trauma? Trauma and a high functioning Intellectual Disability? It does appear that childhood and fantasy (Disney etc) are a very fixed theme with her, at least for 29 years. Does anything that shakes her out of that fantasy incite rage in her? I don't know. But its a good analytical question
I don't see evidence of intellectual disability in her actions or facial expressions in the videos, narratives about her, etc. In fact, she seems pretty sharp. "No, we don;t call him James. WE call him Jonathan!" Her ability to keep things hidden. Her close control of her son when he went to college. her stated desire for a reality show. her communications on FB, like to the fertility nurse? etc.
My speculation about an ID in the high range are based on limited information such as her regressed state, her inappropriate affect in videos both in court and in Vegas, her obsession with Disney and her apparent disinterest in her children other than her baby. It is really just a feeling at this point, as in I wouldn't be shocked if we learned that, but if not, I wouldn't be shocked either.
A huge cause of it is actually abandonment by a caretaker. From what I've read and witnessed, the primary caretaker not allowing for proper separation-individuation early in life and then in adolescence is not a cause as much as abandonment is (either physical or more often, emotional). And of course straight up abuse, physical and especially emotional.
Yes, absolutely abandonment or, more importantly perceived abandonment during the separation individuation process as a toddler and then again as an adolescent. When a child/toddler is given the message that the mother is upset with the separation individuation (Crawling to explore your world and then later pushing boundaries as teen) and love is withheld or taken away, the child learns that their separation individuation means abandonment and the attachment gets all distorted. This causes the Borderline adult to have poor boundaries (get to close to fast, ALL IN unrealistically ) and then to see abandonment everywhere and then to idealize, rage and split. Lather rinse repeat. Separation individuation happens twice during our development. And LT was effectively abandoned by her father when he found out about her relationship with DT. LT effectively replaced her father figure for sure. She was a child, 16 years old.
Calling out "No, Jonathan! " in response to the Elvis Impersonator regarding J's name would not be out of the realm of high functioning ID. I also am not sure if DT or LT made those comments on FB to the OBGYN. Either way they were very strange and inappropriate whether he made them or she did. Her close control of her son while in classes says more about his fear than her not having a high functioning ID in my opinion. And again, it's just a vibe I get, not something I am absolutely asserting. As far as her actions to keep things hidden...OH YEAH, I believe she knew right from wrong and that she had to hide it. But an intellectual disability in the high range would not thwart you from knowing right from wrong.
I don't know about bi-polar for her. I don't know enough. Don't they tend to have issues with substance or alcohol abuse a lot? Anxiety and depression?
Bipolar disorder and substance abuse are found together in extremely high numbers. Also Bipolar Disorder and Borderline often present similarly and can take clinicians time to differentiate. And to make it all easier , you can be DX'd with both Bipolar and Borderline. So Yes. YES. AND YES. Bipolar Disorder is an actual form of depression. (Unipolar Depression and Bipolar Depression. And Borderline Personality Disorder presents with a ton of anxiety. So many Diagnosis can exist within one person.
The latter sure fits with hoarding.
Hoarding almost always has roots in trauma and is a form of anxiety
I hope we will be able to find something out. I doubt it though. Usually that stuff is sealed.
