CA CA - Ember Graham, 7 mo., Happy Valley, 2 July 2015 - #1

[gitana1]

Is it possible MG decided to give the baby some of that oil he was making thinking it would calm her down and instead she died?
Or did he go some place which required lots of walking and leave her in that hot car?
Also, who puts a 7 month old fussy baby unstrapped in a car seat, did something happen to her if she has a seizure not strapped in?

The video apparently shows him bringing the baby into the store and pumping gas. I think it's thus clear that the baby was alive before that hourlong ride north of the gas station. So no accident, no natural death, no panic. It's murder.

 

[sunflowerchick]

RSBM Emph. mine

You and probably the rest of us here are wanting to 'projectile' hurl. My god.

As far as the sperm donor here, MG (I refuse to call him a 'father' or 'dad'); I will need to sit on my hands.
Seriously wondering what the heck was Ember's mom thinking ? Just how simple minded could a person be to think this was a liveable situation ? By simple minded I'm thinking about someone who is blinded by their "need" for someone --- to the point they are no longer living in reality.

What were the grandparents of Ember thinking ? Were they shut out by these two and not allowed a 'say' in the conditions in which their granddaughter was going to live ?

People who are blessed enough to have a baby at all should be grateful and ensure his/her proper care ... and if it's not possible; let someone else look after your little one !!! Smh.

:moo:

See my previous posts. I completely disagree and I do not think this mother needs our judgment. We do not know her background or anything about her. We do not know if she has the ability or know-how to provide better. It seems to me that she is guilty of trusting the baby's father to care for her adequately, nothing more.

Let's not forget, there are other places in this world where living conditions are similar to this trailer, if not worse, and people manage to raise healthy and happy kids. The problem here isn't the living conditions.

 

[Nece]

I haven't watched the video because I'm afraid it will upset me too much (though now I'm curious), but I've often referred to my daughter as "that baby" and "that little girl."

I found this to be distancing. I know people use the phrase but if you think about it it's only in situations where one person is distancing themselves. I used the phrase "your daughter" and "your granddaughter' when talking to my husband or parents but I only used this phrase when she was being naughty. JMO

 

[Ontario Mom]

The video apparently shows him bringing the baby into the store and pumping gas. I think it's thus clear that the baby was alive before that hourlong ride north of the gas station. So no accident, no natural death, no panic. It's murder.

Just spoke to a close & trusted source about this honey oil crap. It doesn't make you forgetful or hallucinate or any of that other stuff. It just makes you high (kicks in faster and more intense than just smoking pot) and there's no reason to expect you'd "forget" anything that went on during your "wax" high. He said anyone claiming that is either lying thru their teeth or was doing something else along with it.

So, take it for what it's worth.

 

[SCHMAE]

I watched the video of the mother. She seems a little off, super focused on all the people helping, and sort of repeats herself and pauses awkwardly. I think she's medicated.

She may be and if I were her I would be medicated this week, as well , on anything a dr would give me. That doesn't necessarily mean she's been ' medicated' prior to this week. I haven't watched any videos. I typically do not when on a thread like this. They distract my mind from just the facts, I suppose. I have seen many videos where a family member appeared for sure guilty or for sure innocent to me, only to find out I am wrong . So I quit watching them.

 

[sunflowerchick]

After reading the agency report linked earlier that described the side FX of the meds this sweet baby was on, my first thought was "he didn't give her those meds because he KNEW she'd be restless and wide awake and he wanted her sleeping". My second thought was "did he dose her to get her back to sleep?"

I wasn't born yesterday but seriously I've never heard of 'honey oil' or wax. Hash oil yes, but I didn't know it was the same thing. I can't even imagine a 6 month old baby with seizures being given such crap or how it would affect them. I don't dare say what I think of Ember's mother, allowing this precious baby girl to be with this person, in these conditions. I don't care HOW much she thinks he loved her.

Best to end here before I get myself in trouble.

Interestingly, CBD oil is being used for children with seizure disorders because it helps when all other medications fail.

http://psychcentral.com/news/2015/0...zures-in-kids-with-severe-epilepsy/83523.html

I was thinking that the "father" gave the baby some "honey" to help her sleep but that doesn't explain the video car ride.

 

[JeannaT]

The video apparently shows him bringing the baby into the store and pumping gas. I think it's thus clear that the baby was alive before that hourlong ride north of the gas station. So no accident, no natural death, no panic. It's murder.

Well, or, he took the baby back home and put her lovingly to sleep and someone broke in and took her. I don't know.

I'm just going to say this, although I could be wrong. I don't think he planned ahead of time to murder her. I don't think that was his plan.

Although maybe it was. It just doesn't seem like that to me.

 

[liserhart]

Great post. Thanks.

ASSUMING he was going the speed limit which is probably 55 on the rural road, they would have a pretty large radius. Wonder if they have cell phone pings. (If he had one)

Every time we go to Happy Valley (our doctors office is on Cloverdale) we have no service. No cell service until we get back onto Hwy 273 (Market st.) The roads that are out there are one lane each way and there are curves. These are back roads and there isn't another way to take to get home.
If he was gone for an hour according to video surveillance than he could have gone through Redding. Makes me think that maybe I should be searching in my area instead of HV.

 

[menmo]

So you smoke the honey oil? Sorry I've never heard of it either.
What would happen if he was smoking it around Ember with her health conditions.
Just had a thought come to me what if he blew it in her face?

Hoping against odds that Ember is safe.

JMO

 

[Ontario Mom]

See my previous posts. I completely disagree and I do not think this mother needs our judgment. We do not know her background or anything about her. We do not know if she has the ability or know-how to provide better. It seems to me that she is guilty of trusting the baby's father to care for her adequately, nothing more.

Let's not forget, there are other places in this world where living conditions are similar to this trailer, if not worse, and people manage to raise healthy and happy kids. The problem here isn't the living conditions.

Northern CA isn't a 3rd world country where deplorable living conditions are the norm and parents know how to circumvent deadly conditions for their babies. I don't want to unjustly or unfairly judge baby mama here but good gracious, this was (and yes, I say was because I don't believe sweet Ember is still with us) a special needs baby that DEMANDED special precautionary measures for her basic living conditions. At the very least, this mother needed to ensure the home where this infant was, met those needs. Clearly, she did not do that.

I was 18 with a newborn daughter in 1983 and even at that young and tender, oh-so-ignorant age, THAT GIRL came first, 100% of the time. Never, in 20 billion years would she have ever been allowed to be "cared for" by anyone living in such conditions. NEVER.

 

[menmo]

Every time we go to Happy Valley (our doctors office is on Cloverdale) we have no service. No cell service until we get back onto Hwy 273 (Market st.) The roads that are out there are one lane each way and there are curves. These are back roads and there isn't another way to take to get home.
If he was gone for an hour according to video surveillance than he could have gone through Redding. Makes me think that maybe I should be searching in my area instead of HV.

Wondering if he knew someone out there he went to visit or maybe someone he delivered something to if you know what I mean.
JMO

 

[bluesneakers]

I found this to be distancing. I know people use the phrase but if you think about it it's only in situations where one person is distancing themselves. I used the phrase "your daughter" and "your granddaughter' when talking to my husband or parents but I only used this phrase when she was being naughty. JMO

I don't know. JMO, but I disagree it's only in situations where one person is distancing themselves. I've never said it in that way nor has my husband. And when we say "your daughter" it might either be she did something that reminds me us of the other, or did something funny/awesome. My parents referred to me like this too. Lately it's been any time she eats spicy foods. My bff affectionately says "that girl" about her daughter when she's done something funny or crazy.

I'm not defending the mom like she's definitely not guilty. Just adding another perspective. All jmo of course. I think a lot of it is wanting to talk about Ember and hold on to hope she's okay.

 

[JeannaT]

Northern CA isn't a 3rd world country where deplorable living conditions are the norm and parents know how to circumvent deadly conditions for their babies. I don't want to unjustly or unfairly judge baby mama here but good gracious, this was (and yes, I say was because I don't believe sweet Ember is still with us) a special needs baby that DEMANDED special precautionary measures for her basic living conditions. At the very least, this mother needed to ensure the home where this infant was, met those needs. Clearly, she did not do that.

I was 18 with a newborn daughter in 1983 and even at that young and tender, oh-so-ignorant age, THAT GIRL came first, 100% of the time. Never, in 20 billion years would she have ever been allowed to be "cared for" by anyone living in such conditions. NEVER.

I think you should read Wally Lamb's "Couldn't Keep it to Ourselves". Nonfiction histories written by women currently in prison in the US, young and older. You might be very surprised at the circumstances some people in the US live in. Wally Lamb taught a writing class in a women's prison, recently, and published their stories.

I think you might be surprised - as I was - at the depravity and hopelessness some families endure in the good old US of A.

 

[bluesneakers]

She may be and if I were her I would be medicated this week, as well , on anything a dr would give me. That doesn't necessarily mean she's been ' medicated' prior to this week. I haven't watched any videos. I typically do not when on a thread like this. They distract my mind from just the facts, I suppose. I have seen many videos where a family member appeared for sure guilty or for sure innocent to me, only to find out I am wrong . So I quit watching them.

I understand. For me it's more about not wanting to see anyone in so much pain.

 

[Ontario Mom]

She may be and if I were her I would be medicated this week, as well , on anything a dr would give me. That doesn't necessarily mean she's been ' medicated' prior to this week. I haven't watched any videos. I typically do not when on a thread like this. They distract my mind from just the facts, I suppose. I have seen many videos where a family member appeared for sure guilty or for sure innocent to me, only to find out I am wrong . So I quit watching them.

The only vid I've watched so far in this case was of Ember's mom telling us all how much baby-daddy loved his girl. I think she genuinely believed that, or genuinely needed to believe it. I can't watch any others right now. I made that mistake with baby Delano Wilson's case late last summer when I KNEW better after watching Susan Smith so many years ago.

 

[gitana1]

Well, or, he took the baby back home and put her lovingly to sleep and someone broke in and took her. I don't know.

I'm just going to say this, although I could be wrong. I don't think he planned ahead of time to murder her. I don't think that was his plan.

Although maybe it was. It just doesn't seem like that to me.

Then where was he for an hour with the baby? Which he claimed took only 10 minutes?

 

[m_brown]

I think you should read Wally Lamb's "Couldn't Keep it to Ourselves". Nonfiction histories written by women currently in prison in the US, young and older. You might be very surprised at the circumstances some people in the US live in. Wally Lamb taught a writing class in a women's prison, recently, and published their stories.

I think you might be surprised - as I was - at the depravity and hopelessness some families endure in the good old US of A.

From what we know from MSM, mom was preparing to move back in with MG. IMO, this sounds like it was probably a choice she was making. She, as far as I know has been living with her parents and Ember. Posts to her SM which can't be brought here do not show deplorable living conditions wherever she has been living recently. Why couldn't Ember just stay there with her while she packed up?

Surely, they could have qualified for some financial assistance to live somewhere with running water, working sewage facilities and possibly even air conditioning...

JMO

 

[Ontario Mom]

Well, or, he took the baby back home and put her lovingly to sleep and someone broke in and took her. I don't know.

I'm just going to say this, although I could be wrong. I don't think he planned ahead of time to murder her. I don't think that was his plan.

Although maybe it was. It just doesn't seem like that to me.

FWIW, I do believe he loved her to pieces, based solely on what I've read on his FB. However, that being said, I also think he was/is a druggie idiot, who thought he would just help her sleep by either withholding her prescribed meds or supplementing them with something he cooked up himself.

moo.

 

[JeannaT]

Then where was he for an hour with the baby? Which he claimed took only 10 minutes?

I don't know. I really don't. It could be that he planned all along to murder this baby, and then be free of his obligation. But what I'm seeing on facebook is he REALLY wanted to be with the baby, and when he was, he invited family there to enjoy her with him. He was worried that the rumors about him being with an ex might cause him to not have visitation with Ember.

I'm just not seeing it, that he planned ahead to kill her, which is what you're surmising. Although I agree that could be the case, you never know what's in someone's heart. There have certainly been men who have killed their children (i'm specifically thinking of the dad who poisoned his kids with halloween pixie sticks 20+ years ago and NO ONE suspected it).

 

[LietKynes]

See my previous posts. I completely disagree and I do not think this mother needs our judgment. We do not know her background or anything about her. We do not know if she has the ability or know-how to provide better. It seems to me that she is guilty of trusting the baby's father to care for her adequately, nothing more.

Let's not forget, there are other places in this world where living conditions are similar to this trailer, if not worse, and people manage to raise healthy and happy kids. The problem here isn't the living conditions.

RSBM

I 'thanked' your post because I welcome your opinion. It would be a boring world if everyone agreed with each other.
Maybe Jamie G. was raised in conditions like this trailer -- without running water and a working toilet ? Some people living off the grid survive like this. And so she'd think it was fine.
My opinion is that MG may have misled her into thinking he was some sort of dependable, responsible man. Like perhaps MG told her that the trailer was going to have improvements or remodeling ? When he may have been nothing like that.

I was not trying to judge JG -- apologies for a post that appeared to condemn without reason -- ; nothing has surfaced that would make one think she had prior knowledge of what MG might have done to Ember.
It strains the mind to think he will try to pass this off as an accident. That is, if Ember is deceased.

The best news is that Ember appeared with him on the surveillance vid., showing she was alive and in good health (as in, not suffering a seizure). Just how the heck is MG going to spin this ? Is he going to say he stopped by the road somewhere else for a drink and someone snatched her from his truck ?
I think le will know how to get information out of him.

This case is one of those where I get too upset... mostly because there's a baby involved. A little one who is utterly helpless, and completely dependent on her caregivers. Just seems like she was failed by one who should have had her best interests at heart.

:moo: