CA - Massive fire at Oakland warehouse party, 36 dead, 2 Dec 2016 #2

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Jax49 said:
WARNING (offensive material in the article) WARNING

I think this was linked earlier, but it has been updated. Some of the information is so gross I won't post it, but it you feel up to it search for the word condom.

http://nypost.com/2016/12/05/owner-of-oakland-rave-cave-was-a-negligent-father-and-drug-addict/
Click to expand...

I feel very sorry for Micah's and Derick's parents and grandparents of their children. Can you imagine the worry they have lived with?! They got the kids removed, but they were later returned. Michael Allison has said that Derick's mother and sister are good people and he hopes the kids can go back to them.

His description of DA is chilling, including DA's self description. No wonder we see Manson in his eyes.

Almena’s father-in-law, Michael Allison, agreed — saying he wanted the self-described “thriller love child of Manson, Pol Pot and Hitler” to be punished to the fullest extent.
“[Almena] needs to be sent away to prison for a long time because he’s a menace, he’s an absolute menace — a plague, a danger,” the dad told the Daily Mail. “He’s crazy, I mean the guy’s completely crazy.”

http://nypost.com/2016/12/05/owner-of-oakland-rave-cave-was-a-negligent-father-and-drug-addict/
 
This is a couple days old, but I see there is a center for assistance to the families of victims. Not sure if Gitana has found it, so posting here:

OAKLAND (KRON)—The city of Oakland has set up a family assistance center for those who are looking to find their loved ones after the deadly warehouse fire in Oakland.
Mayor Libby Schaaf tweeted that the center is on 2425 East 12th Street. People can also call (510)382-3000 if they are not sure where to find them.

http://kron4.com/2016/12/03/family-...p-following-deadly-warehouse-fire-in-oakland/
 
Jax49 said:
WARNING (offensive material in the article) WARNING

I think this was linked earlier, but it has been updated. Some of the information is so gross I won't post it, but it you feel up to it search for the word condom.

http://nypost.com/2016/12/05/owner-of-oakland-rave-cave-was-a-negligent-father-and-drug-addict/
Click to expand...
Oh geez. Reminds me of a family I worked with once. The grandma would come to school and rail on the teachers for letting the 3 year old get sand on their shoes (you know, from the sandbox) and it was so hard not to scream, "okay you do realize this same 3 year old came to school chewing a used condom like freaking bubble gum and you're angry about sandy shoes?" Deflection, misdirection, projection.
 
Just coming here to say hugs and prayers - not only for gitana and family, but for all of these unfortunate victims. This is a horrible and very sad story. I hope they hit this fool with the book.
 
Jax49 said:
WARNING (offensive material in the article) WARNING

I think this was linked earlier, but it has been updated. Some of the information is so gross I won't post it, but it you feel up to it search for the word condom.

http://nypost.com/2016/12/05/owner-of-oakland-rave-cave-was-a-negligent-father-and-drug-addict/
Click to expand...

Great place to have your children lay their heads to rest at night! This is disgusting! Absolutely disgusting! Fire hazards, health hazards. Great parenting. Just great! The more I read about this guy, the angrier I become.

If you look at how much he was charging people to stay, how many people were usually there, and how much the rent was, you can see that he was probably scraping at least $5,000 a month off the top of it all. $5,000 a month could have been put towards at least making some updates in there. A working stove, a water heater, an electrician, REAL stairs. No, it still wouldn't be legal, but at least he could have made it safer. One tenant even said that when she moved in, he charged an extra months rent for updates, which was $700. She said she never saw the improvements. However, one previous tenant said he went to a piano store and bought them out of old pianos.

Meth sucks. :(
 
Oakland fire touches two Detroit artists

Michael H. Hodges, Detroit News Fine Arts Writer 12:32 a.m. EST December 6, 2016

Two Detroit artists were hit hard by news of Friday night’s fire in an Oakland, California, artists’ warehouse.

Monica Canilao, who divides her time between Oakland and Detroit, said she would have been at the doomed party had she not been out of state at Miami’s Art Basel.

“I lost people I know,” she said. “It’s hard to wrap your head around.”

Canilao admits that the subject of fire safety was one that came up from time to time at the Ghost Ship, as the warehouse was called...

http://www.detroitnews.com/story/en.../12/06/detroit-artists-oakland-fire/95029520/
 
I'm seeing in some news articles about DA's interview today that Today also showed his gf/wife Micah in recorded clips. Is that anywhere online?
 
Not condoning anything !!

Today Show

Wow. Potent.It did answer a lot of important questions. The hallmark of the Narcissist is a total inability to respond to criticism. It is core.

His initial motivations were helpful to learn. Correct or incorrect , in his thinking and believing that is what he was doing.

I believe he is "stuck" in getting past what his motivations were, what happened along the way, and Friday night.

Another component of malignant narcissism is an authentic inability to put oneself in another person shoes, it just does not register cognitively or emotionally, and as a result,t they wound people along the way.His conflicted relationships are indicative of theNarcissit and how they interact with the world around them. Skewed indeed.

His actual behavior during the interview demonstrates the childlike response to criticism.

The ability to take criticism well depends mostly on how secure we feel about ourselves. ....it's a challenge to avoid feeling defensive when we experience ourselves as attacked. ...to go into self-protective mode.

And typically, the way we choose to protect ourselves is through denying the criticism, indignantly turning on the criticizer, or hastening to disengage (interview) from the uncomfortable situation entirely.


..... When criticized, narcissists show themselves woefully incapable of retaining any emotional poise, or receptivity. And it really doesn't much matter whether the nature of that criticism is constructive or destructive. ........ these disturbed individuals demonstrate an abnormally developed capacity to criticize others (as in, "dish it out" to them).

Although narcissists don't (or won't) show it, all perceived criticism feels gravely threatening to them (the reason that their inflamed, over-the-top reactions to it can leave us so surprised and confused).

Deep down, clinging desperately not simply to a positive but grandiose sense of self, they're compelled at all costs to block out any negative feedback about themselves.

Their dilemma is that the rigidity of their defenses, their inability ever to let their guard down (even with those closest to them), guarantees that they'll never get what they most need, which they themselves aresadly--no, tragically--oblivious of.


To better grasp why narcissists... People aren't born narcissistic--it's powerful environmental influences that cause them to become so.

As a caveat, however, I should add that no single theory adequately accounts for every instance of NPD. The explanation I'll be offering, .....though it's a bit oversimplified,.... it elucidates the essential dynamic of the narcissistic defense system

.... in growing up future narcissists had many reasons to doubt whether they were good enough. ... held to unrealistically high standards of behavior. ....couldn't help but feel defective, ,doubting their fundamental worth as humans.

Totally fits he placed himself wherein he felt omnipotent, needed, valued.

In most instances, neither did they feel cared about or wanted--... they never seemed able to acquire their approval or validation), in their head they cultivated an imaginary "ideal self" that could get the parental acceptance--....narcissistic adults project an air of importance, superiority, entitlement, and grandiosity, it's a pronounced reaction (or over-reaction) to the massive self-doubt


.....less appreciated is that this deficiency represents an unfortunate consequence of their growing up so preoccupied with their own frustrated needs--and emotional distress generally--that they could never develop sufficient sensitivity to others.

Intensely driven to succeed, or at least see themselves as successful, their focus inevitably became myopic, pathologically self-centered.

Without any clear recognition of what's motivating them, in their relationships as adults they continue to seek the encouragement, support, and acceptance denied them earlier.........

they're criticized, or think they're being criticized (and they're definitely hyper-alert to the possibility), they're compelled to react aggressively, in the frantic effort to avoid re-experiencing the terrible feelings ofloneliness, abandonment, or rejection
Which is why they need constantly to prove themselves b... ironically, serves in time only to alienate


It's precisely this need to be viewed as perfect, superlative, or infallible that makes them so hypersensitive to criticism. And their typical reaction to criticism, the "narcissistic rage"
decidedly at risk for going ballistic against their perceived adversary.

.....mortally threatened when anyone (matt Laur) dares question their words or behavior. .....xternal expression of doubt can tap into their own self-doubts.

And this is why, though they can certainly "dish it out" (by way of affirming to themselves their superiority over others), they just can't "take it" se.

, by way of safeguarding themselves from such never-resolved feelings of worthlessness or defeat, they're likely to react to present-day threats with contempt or defiance, or with a verbal violence frequently referred to as "narcissistic rage."


At last, the prodigious defenses of those with NPD simply don't permit them to grow, to evolve, or to take full responsibility for their lives.

Given their considerable drive, they're frequently able to attain more and more things. But as Huston Smith wisely declared: "You can never get enough of what you don't really want."


.... Lacking the ego strength that would allow them to be genuinely vulnerable to others--the prerequisite for the intimacy they secretly long for... this time they're not just the victim but the "perpetrator," too.

In attempting to avoid any resurgence of the acute pain they once felt with their non-nurturant caretakers, they succeed only in muting--or burying--this pain.

https://www.psychologytoday.com/blog/evolution-the-self/201110/the-narcissists-dilemma-they-can-dish-it-out
 
Thanks CARIIS. His FB page screamed narcissism and narcissistic rage, but seeing him respond to Matt Lauer confirmed that impression. He will never be able to understand what he did wrong because it would destroy his image of himself.
 
Jax49 said:
BBM

The kids had school Saturday?
Click to expand...


That whole thing is just a blatent lie! We certainly better find out, no matter which agency dropped the ball in returning the kids their - one of the conditions I would hope is that they never be allowed back there.

He is not gonna say my kids are at the hotel (and have been wherever since returned) because where I had them live had drugs condoms sex feces nails no water etc .

I think he is surprised at how much of his dirty laundry is going to be aired in the next half a year.

And hey that is the beauty of this place - agree to disagree , I think suicide is def possibility - he cant handle walking down the street and in a blazing headline dashing his completely skewed vision of himslef,
 
So sorry for you loss Gitana1. Said a prayer last night for your family and will continue to pray for comfort and peace to you all.


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk
 
CARIIS said:
That whole thing is just a blatent lie! We certainly better find out, no matter which agency dropped the ball in returning the kids their - one of the conditions I would hope is that they never be allowed back there.

He is not gonna say my kids are at the hotel (and have been wherever since returned) because where I had them live had drugs condoms sex feces nails no water etc .

I think he is surprised at how much of his dirty laundry is going to be aired in the next half a year.

And hey that is the beauty of this place - agree to disagree , I think suicide is def possibility - he cant handle walking down the street and in a blazing headline dashing his completely skewed vision of himslef,
Click to expand...

But he won't see that is indeed his dirty laundry. He will say it is beautiful and misunderstood and alternative and needed and creative and a service. Not his fault that a fire broke out and people died because his vision for it all was beautiful.

jmo
 
Guys

local news they are giving out sand bags for tomm good lord
 
CARIIS said:
That whole thing is just a blatent lie! We certainly better find out, no matter which agency dropped the ball in returning the kids their - one of the conditions I would hope is that they never be allowed back there.

He is not gonna say my kids are at the hotel (and have been wherever since returned) because where I had them live had drugs condoms sex feces nails no water etc .

I think he is surprised at how much of his dirty laundry is going to be aired in the next half a year.

And hey that is the beauty of this place - agree to disagree , I think suicide is def possibility - he cant handle walking down the street and in a blazing headline dashing his completely skewed vision of himslef,
Click to expand...
BBM

DA himself admitted in the Today Show interview that he and his family usually slept at the warehouse, so apparently they still lived there. Whether that was in violation of the conditions for their return, we don't know...yet.

You could be right about suicide. But the anger expressed on FB and toward Lauer also causes me concern that he will cause harm to anyone he blames for destroying his self image.
 
cant help it - a therapist - rewatch the interview

BUT there is a delay is him hearing the questions- watch the facial reactions about 8 seconds behind the actual audio we hear

can't help it after several years much of it was much more about what was not being said than the air passing over vocal cords!!
 
Lilibet said:
BBM

DA himself admitted in the Today Show interview that he and his family usually slept at the warehouse, so apparently they still lived there. Whether that was in violation of the conditions for their return, we don't know...yet.

You could be right about suicide. But the anger expressed on FB and toward Lauer also causes me concern that he will cause harm to anyone he blames for destroying his self image.
Click to expand...

Is his Facebook page back up?
 
Inthedetails said:
But he won't see that is indeed his dirty laundry. He will say it is beautiful and misunderstood and alternative and needed and creative and a service. Not his fault that a fire broke out and people died because his vision for it all was beautiful.

jmo
Click to expand...

Spot on. That was exactly his attitude when his kids were removed (or kidnapped, as he put it). Nothing is ever his responsibility, and if people say negative things about him they are lying and trying to destroy him. Ugh.
 
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