CA - Rebecca Nalepa - suicide or murder? #8

[oceanblueeyes]

I didn't get to watch the press conference, so I'm wondering if the ME was speaking only about cases in San Diego County? I could easily believe that the manner of suicide would be unusual in any given county, but I wonder what the nation-wide, or world-wide statistics would be about this kind of suicide.

I have no reason to doubt that Rebecca was modest. But I also think that when you enter the mental state where you are going through with a suicide, a lot of a person's usual behaviors like modesty, or concern for the feelings of others, just get drowned out by the horrible storm of negative emotions that you're is feeling.

It doesn't surprise me that Rebecca would kill herself after Max's death. The manner in which she tied her feet gives me pause, but stranger things have happened, obviously.

Yes, they specifically were talking about the San Diego area only.

ITA with your post.

IMO

 

[sorrell skye]

Maybe she felt anger at JS for blaming her for Max's death. Maybe she had other issues with JS that were ongoing, and when he lashed out at her over Max's death, she replied in kind.

Is there evidence that JS blamed Rebecca for Maxie's accident and subsequent death? Is there evidence that JS "lashed out" at Rebecca for Maxie's accident & subsequent death?

 

[jjenny]

She might well have felt guilty regarding even the mere possibility that her dog had caused the fall. And not knowing for sure but having that gnawing doubt might have even been more tortuous to her mental and emotional state.

Why is it her dog as opposed to JS's dog?

 

[katydid23]

bbm

Is a caregiver not allowed to go to the bathroom? Should Rebecca have insisted that Max go into the bathroom with her?

As far as the ridiculous scenario offered by LE about Max "running" and "falling" over the railing - ?????????????

Sure a caregiver can use the bathroom. But this was a 27 room home. So it took some doing to do so safely. In a normal home it would not be dangerous to go to the bathroom really quick. But this is a different situation because of the dangerous staircase set up.

Maybe she should have waited until the 13 yr old came out of the shower first. Or used a bathroom upstairs near where Max was.

What do you find ridiculous about their scenario of Max and the staircase? What do you think happened?

 

[MyBelle]

Trained in the medical field?



I seemed to hear LE state that this was an accident and that by the nature of Max and his behaviors, they could not justify a belief that he was jumping off the balcony to try and hang on to the chandelier, but instead used it to try and break his fall. The repeated again that Maxie was not the kind of child that would show a behavior of doing something like sliding down the bannister or jumping off the staircase. (paraphrased, not a quote). They stated he could have been running, kicking a ball or been pushed by Ocean. Not that he wad attempting a stunt.

If that is true, and LE or family didn't find Rebecca negligent, why are you? I do find this to be trashing language.

Rebecca was a technician who worked with eye surgeons. I assume she was trained in basic first aid such as CPR.

I don't believe differing opinions are trashing anyone.

 

[katydid23]

Is there evidence that JS blamed Rebecca for Maxie's accident and subsequent death? Is there evidence that JS "lashed out" at Rebecca for Maxie's accident & subsequent death?

The only evidence is the erased phone message, which was sent right before the suicide, and the fact that she never went to or was invited to the hospital to see Max.

JS never came back to the home or called her early on to see how she was doing or tell her she was NOT at fault either.

 

[infobabe]

Nicely said and you validated that I really didn't miss anything key.

Did they think that having someone sit there and struggle through just making the wrist knots was going to be convincing that all of it happened. How many times did the Rebecca sustitute have to work on that before they started videotaping it anyway? Rebecca just happened to be able to do those intricate rope knots trying it one time on the spur of the moment but "they doubt she may even have been able to do it again".

I don't get her painting on the door either, like you said.

Right along the lines of what i am thinking. Did she do research to find out how to tie your hands behind your back. And they didn't show how she did this with her feet tied. Did she do a lot of hopping? And why would she tie her feet? Are they alledging that she was trying to make it look like a homicide?

Because the only other person I could find in research who tied their hands AND feet to committ suicide was trying to make it look like a homicide so the faily could benefit from his life insurance.

SignOnSanDiego said today that Niel Nalepa told them the painted door said "She saved him, can he save her." I'm sorry I don't have the link right now, but you can go to the site, it is their latest article on it.

She could have had a gun pointing at her while she did this to herself. And where did the black paint come from? And what is the signifigance of the message?

And don't tugboat captains have knowledge of all sorts of knots? Adam could have killed her, on his own or at the urging of his brother.

And that message is directed at her and Shacknai, I think. Or it was something she wrote before she enacted this elaborate staging to make people think that she had been murdered. And THAT I cannot buy.

Whether it was suicide or murder or suicide, WAY too many questions are unanswered, and they are important ones. This is where you brief the family and maybe the public about what you have so far, and then say the investigation is ongoing. IMO.

 

[cluciano63]

I do not think I am trashing her. I am simply saying that I can see why she might have felt guilty after his death. I think there might have been some negligence if she was not supervising him well enough to prevent him from going over the upper staircase balcony. This is not your regular family home, where you could leave a 6 yr old alone while you went to the bathroom. This home had dangerous staircases and 27 rooms. It requires more supervision than the average home, imo.

I kind of wonder if she had temporarily passed the baton, so to speak, to the other youth there, to keep an eye on Max...it happens...

 

[elementry]

This is the supposed suicide note that's not a suicide note but a message (or whatever LE was getting at)

From signonsandiego:

<........A message written in black paint on the door to the guest room with the balcony was also discovered. Officials would not disclose the contents of the message, but Zahau's ex-husband, Neil Nalepa, told The San Diego Union-Tribune it read: "She saved him, can he save her.".......>

 

[katydid23]

I kind of wonder if she had temporarily passed the baton, so to speak, to the other youth there, to keep an eye on Max...it happens...

Yes, but it is reported that the 13 yr old was in the shower at the time. So my point is just that maybe she should have waited until the 13 yr old was out of the shower before she too went into the bathroom.One of them should have been supervising Max, imo.

 

[Quester]

The only evidence is the erased phone message, which was sent right before the suicide, and the fact that she never went to or was invited to the hospital to see Max.

JS never came back to the home or called her early on to see how she was doing or tell her she was NOT at fault either.

Who sent the erased phone message?

How do you know she never went to or was invited to the hospital?

How do you know JS never came back to the home?

How do you know that JS never called her early on to see how she was doing?

How do you know JS never told her she was NOT at fault?

Links please! Thx.

 

[elementry]

Why is it her dog as opposed to JS's dog?

the weimareiner (spelling?) was supposedly her pup.

 

[jjenny]

Rebecca was a technician who worked with eye surgeons. I assume she was trained in basic first aid such as CPR.

I don't believe differing opinions are trashing anyone.

And? The child had a spinal cord injury. How do you suppose she could have fixed that?

 

[jjenny]

This is the supposed suicide note that's not a suicide note but a message (or whatever LE was getting at)

From signonsandiego:

<........A message written in black paint on the door to the guest room with the balcony was also discovered. Officials would not disclose the contents of the message, but Zahau's ex-husband, Neil Nalepa, told The San Diego Union-Tribune it read: "She saved him, can he save her.".......>

That is one bizarre message. What could it possibly mean? It makes no sense.

 

[katydid23]

This is the supposed suicide note that's not a suicide note but a message (or whatever LE was getting at)

From signonsandiego:

<........A message written in black paint on the door to the guest room with the balcony was also discovered. Officials would not disclose the contents of the message, but Zahau's ex-husband, Neil Nalepa, told The San Diego Union-Tribune it read: "She saved him, can he save her.".......>

WOW. My interpretation, fwiw, is that she is talking to JS. She may be saying that she 'saved' him, perhaps from his loneliness, his prior marriage, whatever. But can he save her, from herself perhaps?

 

[sorrell skye]

I'm astounded that anyone would seek to blame Rebecca for Maxie's death.

 

[elementry]

Right along the lines of what i am thinking. Did she do research to find out how to tie your hands behind your back. And they didn't show how she did this with her feet tied. Did she do a lot of hopping? And why would she tie her feet? Are they alledging that she was trying to make it look like a homicide?

Because the only other person I could find in research who tied their hands AND feet to committ suicide was trying to make it look like a homicide so the faily could benefit from his life insurance.

SignOnSanDiego said today that Niel Nalepa told them the painted door said "She saved him, can he save her." I'm sorry I don't have the link right now, but you can go to the site, it is their latest article on it.

She could have had a gun pointing at her while she did this to herself. And where did the black paint come from? And what is the signifigance of the message?

And don't tugboat captains have knowledge of all sorts of knots? Adam could have killed her, on his own or at the urging of his brother.

And that message is directed at her and Shacknai, I think. Or it was something she wrote before she enacted this elaborate staging to make people think that she had been murdered. And THAT I cannot buy.

Whether it was suicide or murder or suicide, WAY too many questions are unanswered, and they are important ones. This is where you brief the family and maybe the public about what you have so far, and then say the investigation is ongoing. IMO.

Some good points. It may just be my abiding skepticism, but LE did not impress me as actually having left no stone unturned. Definitely, work to determine where that paint came from, where she learned to make the knots - especially the one fastening the rope to the bed - that was no random knotting in my amateur opinion.

http://www.sdsheriff.net/coronado/images/rz8671.jpg

http://www.sdsheriff.net/coronado/images/rz8714.jpg

 

[katydid23]

Who sent the erased phone message?

How do you know she never went to or was invited to the hospital?

How do you know JS never came back to the home?

How do you know that JS never called her early on to see how she was doing?

How do you know JS never told her she was NOT at fault?

Links please! Thx.

LE said that JS never went back to the house. And there were NO reports that she ever went to the hospital. I cannot link a report that does not exist.

Those other things are my speculative opinions. I think she felt guilty and she felt others blamed her as well. I could be wrong. But have you heard him say publicly that she was not at fault?

As for the erased phone message, didn't LE say it was from the hospital, telling her Max's turn for the worse?

 

[Quester]

Originally Posted by elementry View Post
This is the supposed suicide note that's not a suicide note but a message (or whatever LE was getting at)

From signonsandiego:

<........A message written in black paint on the door to the guest room with the balcony was also discovered. Officials would not disclose the contents of the message, but Zahau's ex-husband, Neil Nalepa, told The San Diego Union-Tribune it read: "She saved him, can he save her.".......>

WOW. My interpretation, fwiw, is that she is talking to JS. She may be saying that she 'saved' him, perhaps from his loneliness, his prior marriage, whatever. But can he save her, from herself perhaps?

BBM - "She" in your sentence being DS?

 

[MyBelle]

And? The child had a spinal cord injury. How do you suppose she could have fixed that?

I didn't suggest she could have fixed his injury, I suggested she could have prevented it in the first place.