Except there is no sole custody in the state of Colorado. She obtained physical custody (responsiblity) because she moved hundreds of miles away for MR in July of this year where he wouldnt be able to have at least 90 overnight visits per year which is required for shared custody. I just linked the Co. custody laws this morning.
Plus this is believing everything ER has said and Im not willing to do that just yet.
She said he hadnt visited him and implied it had been a very long time and only did when the courts supposedly made him yet MR said Dylan flew into to see him in September of this year just two months before and stayed 3-4 days.
So a lot of things dont add up to me except I sense anger and vindictiveness on the part of Dylan's mom to paint MR in the worse light she can.
IMO
Thank you for your thoughtful response! I did see your link, but I used the term "sole custody" because I was specifically referring to what was written in the local mass media---and they used, wrongly or no, the term "sole custody". The terminology itself doesn't really matter, I don't think; what is truly significant is that the court ruled in Mom's favor, allowing Mom to take Dylan with her when she moved. Courts generally structure their orders to maintain stability and provide consistency for the children; in this instance, the court felt, for whatever reason, that moving with Mom was in Dylan's best-interest---this despite Dylan having grown up in that area, having gone to school and participated in activities in that area, even despite him having Dad in the area. Despite all those stabilizing factors, the court decided that Dylan was better off moving with Mom.
Even more telling, I think, is that older brother also decided to move with Mom and Dylan. At 21yo, he could've readily decided to stay, even live with his Dad, but, notably, he did not. He also, notably, did not come with Dylan to visit his father for the holiday; despite being too old for court-ordered visitation, MR is his father too. Perhaps there is a good reason he chose not join Dylan for the visit (e.g. work schedule?), but the fact that he didn't prompts me to ask why not?
As I said in my ealier post, all these things combined do not match what MR has said regarding Dylan being his whole world--which I find even more curious in the context of MR having other children; there is a lack of sensitivity towards those other children, their grief, their fear, their need for paternal reassurance. If Dylan is MR's "whole world", then where exactly do the other boys fit into his realm of consciousness? If you want to put ER's statements completely aside, look at MR's statements in the context of his other children. Could Dylan's disappearance also be relevant to MR's relationships with the other boys? How about the other boys' relationship with Dylan? I suspect, ever so sadly, that all these things do matter, that there is a pattern of behavior, of choices, of relationships, of parenting, that does not match MR's words.
Maybe my 'Mommy radar' is simply working overdrive, but something is not right, far more than Dylan's tragic disappearance, something is definitely not right.