So I've been thinking about this crime all week. (Obviously-a look at my posting history shows I am a little obsessed.) At first I started familiarizing myself with it because it's the topic of our podcast episode tomorrow night and I was trying to make sure that I had all the facts and didn't screw anything up. But in the last 48 hours I've just obsessed.
I am having a hard time with this one. The fact that we are all speculating and coming up with all of these theories (some of them far-fetched, IMO) and speculations is a testament, I think, to our collective confusion. We've spent a ton of time talking about Thrive and possible cheating, and mental illness (on both of their parts) and financial trouble because, I think, we are ALL having trouble wrapping our heads around this crime and we're just trying to come up with something-ANYTHING-that might help us to understand it.
I'll admit it, I don't get it. I realize that SM doesn't portray life as it is, and I think the majority of her posts were marketing material taken straight out of MLM Social Media 101, but it still does a pretty darn good job of painting a picture-fake or not. Usually by this point people are coming out of the woodwork and talking about control issues, domestic violence instances that were kept hushed, "feelings" that people had, etc. The most we're getting is that he was quiet, kind of shy, and didn't show many emotions-none of which would throw up any red flags. The kids appear close to him in the videos and pictures; it's difficult for kids to fake that (I know because I WAS a child in a bad situation). His eyes looked a little "off", but my husband's do as well. I've actually had people write me and ask if my husband is depressed because he never smiles in pictures. Nope, that's just him. He has the male equivalency of resting ***** face.
So what the heck happened here? A sudden fit of rage could, I think, account for one of the murders but three? Man, that's one psychotic break.
And what WAS his endgame anyway? Was he trying to pull a Scott Peterson? Off his family so that he could start anew as the grieving widower? If that was his plan then he was really, REALLY bad at it because most people online had him pegged as the culprit from the moment he gave that interview. He didn't do any job of setting up the house to make it look like a desertion or a kidnapping. Didn't plant any seeds to friends or on social media, didn't get rid of things that might prove that she just took off, didn't mess the house up to look like an intruder-he literally just took the bodies away and then carried on about his merry way. That is not the work of a smooth criminal. In fact, that goes up there with some of the worst planning, or lack of planning I've seen. Is there a Darwin Awards for crime?
What gets me, too, is that the crime was so utterly useless and pointless. Aside from the fact that ALL murders (especially those of children) are always pointless, he caved within a day or two and admitted to killing them. Now he will be in prison for the rest of his life.
I only knew Shanann through my support groups but I feel so sorry for her and the girls. Not only was she murdered but now her personal life will be picked to shreds on social media and in court. Even if I don't "get" the whole Le-vel thing, she WAS trying to live a good life. Doing things with her kids, traveling, working, etc. Many in my support groups just give up on life and resign themselves to a life of pain and suffering.(Sometimes I throw myself a pity party and do the same.) I have a soft spot for those who attempt to keep chugging along and even thriving (no pun intended) despite their health.
I'm angry on her behalf. No matter what led him to do what he did, it was completely senseless. If there was some kind of outside influence, though, (like a chemical reaction to a supplement or something) then I just hope that it will serve as a warning for people in the future. I don't think it will be anything like that, however I think that probably like many criminals before him, he was a boiling pot and his family was just right there when he finally spilled over. It really makes me sad.