For reference, I have included the statutory definition of domestic violence below. MOO (non-attorney) a formal finding of DV is only relevant for sentencing.
MOO also, BM
slamming SM against a wall and pointing a gun to his head was an act of violence upon her person and meets the definition's terms. It was also a violent response to her desire to leave the marriage, of which BM was fully aware, intended to coerce her to remain in the relationship through fear of his violent reaction if she left - not only toward her but also the daughters. We have no reason to doubt the truth of SM's statements to her friend IMO.
§ 18-6-800.3. Definitions.
As used in this part 8, unless the context otherwise requires:
(1) “Domestic violence” means an act or threatened act of violence upon a person with whom the actor is or has been involved in an intimate relationship. “Domestic violence” also includes any other crime against a person, or against property, including an animal, or any municipal ordinance violation against a person, or against property, including an animal, when used as a method of coercion, control, punishment, intimidation, or revenge directed against a person with whom the actor is or has been involved in an intimate relationship.