I get what you’re saying (and yep re: Bowman!), and also struggle with this, because of the suffering and burden on her daughter she caused, even if awareness of it is buried now. Collateral damage.
How could MT not foresee this. Also a violent, egregious shattering of “girl code,” to the point of IMO conspiring to slaughter. I adored, ADORED my mother… and if I knew she was party to something like this, I’d not trust her again, ever. To love and protect me? No way.
Basic selfishness, that extended to her daughter. Not the kind of love I think of as motherly.
I know I’m projecting again.