Liadan
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- Jan 23, 2007
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In regards to the debrief of the children I have a few perspectives on this. I can definitely see the potential for a manipulative debrief to assist with a coverup, but I can also see the validity of other more positive reasons for a debrief. I can see the value in taking the time to clarify with the children the myriad of things happening in their life at a very tragic and confusing time. I can also see the value of giving children (who have probably been taught to respect adults) the power to not feel they have to answer every prying and possibly gossipy adults questions. I am talking about adults that have no legitimate reason to find out details (not police and people like grandparents). Some adults do see children as easy people to find out juicy information from. Some children are so respectful, innocent and honest that they don't have the confidence, skills, nor power to resist answering questions from prying adults. I can remember as a child my parents giving me the tools, confidence and permission to not answer the questions of prying adults. It was about things like confidential details about my foster siblings that were important for me to understand, and not at all necessary for prying adults. There were other situations that it was appropriate too. We have done the same thing with our own children from time to time, not to facilitate a coverup of anything but for appropriate reasons. I think there is a fine balance with children in teaching them to be open and transparent and able to confidently report to adults appropriate things (eg. Reporting abuse, assisting with a police investigation etc.) and giving them the tools to have the confidence to not answer the questions of adults who are really just prying for their own ends.
You know if this debrief was done by people who loved and supported Allison then I would have no problem accepting the situation and I would say great the girls are being cared for. BUT ....the fact it is done by people who have not given police statements when asked, who have appeared in court to speak with a hidden agenda of Allisons ineptitude and sickness. Who continue to deride her amazing accomplishments.
In fact Allison was constantly trying to fix her marriage, make herself more understanding and open - she wanted her family above all costs. She wanted her extended family happy and proud. This was her aim - unfortunately she was never ever good enough for them.