***GUILTY***The Verdict Waiting Room #3

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brizzymum said:
The whole mess is a tragedy. This will not be popular but I even had a touch of empathy for GBC today. He lost the plot completely...and I'm sure he'd take it back if he could. He just should have 'fessed up' earlier...the 2 year denial has made it all so much worse. RIP ALLISON x
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No need to be upset
..his tears will have dried not long after he disappeared from public view and he will be thinking "how dare they!!!".... absolutely no sympathy here...
 
kiwijayne said:
Exactly.

I grew up in a house full of domestic violence. Luckily my my Mother got out with me but left my brother behind with Dad. When I reached my later teenage years I noticed the narcissistic traits in my whole family bar me. Three years ago after the quakes I made my break to Australia and left the controlling/ manipulative family behind. I survived that due to my resilience. Let's hope that the Dickie family are keeping instilling those resilience traits in those beautiful girls.

That's my story folks laid bare.
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(Hugs) if it doesn't kill your physical body, it kills your heart and mind. You did the right thing xx
 
I am just wondering if the full version of the victim impact statements are available somewhere - the ones I have found seem to be incomplete.
 
Yes i do understand your points. But I am just so averse to affairs as i believe it is wrong, despite my past and probably current low self esteem i still wouldn't do it. I have no interest or sympathy for people who do. I also think your example below is far-fetched, despite low self esteem if she does have it, TM was a woman of the world, she had a career in property, she was not a little shrinking naive mouse with no experience or knowledge of anything. Everyone knows it's wrong to have an affair, and to me you'd always have to question a man who told the story you outline. Fall in love yes, be entranced with the charisma and the facade, feel sorry for the sob-story, yes, understandable, but at the end of the day most caring people would have a degree of cynicism about the extent of some of the story, even if you had fallen in love with the guy. Demonising the wife is such a ploy that generally there would have to be some concern surely. Unless of course you didnt care about the wife anyway - which is why I have no sympathy for her. Understand it, yes, but sympathy no because she didnt care about Allison or the girls, and takes no responsibility.

Opinionsgalore said:
I am in no way saying that what TM or any of those other women did was in any way right.

But indulge me for a moment. Imagine that you're a lonely woman craving affection and a man says something like this: I'm scared for my daughters, if I leave, I'm scared what she'll do to them, I honestly believe that if I leave her, that she will kill my daughters purely for revenge - she's evil and twisted. I'm so lonely, I long to be in a loving relationship with a woman I truly love - that would he like heaven for me, but I'm trapped in a marriage void of love and affection - for the sake of my children who I love more than life itself, *tears*,could I have a hug please.

How would a woman with low self esteem, and feeling lonely react to something like this ?

Just food for thought :)
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Camp Chair said:
"She loved him" aaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaagggggghhhhhhh :tantrum:
Those words have been driving me nuts for 2 blimming years!!!! After all of this, TM still thinks she was in a normal relationship... with a married man... who went on to kill his wife.

I really do think the gravity of Allison's murder is significantly lost on Toni, especially where the 3 girls are concerned. Correction - there appears to be sympathy for herself. Strange demeanor & facial expressions I thought. Her eye contact was in false, over confident 'selling' mode. (Trying to find a web link for it). Look forward to seeing the full interview & I hope interviewer Tara Brown asks some tough questions. I'd like to know what secured the court valet service.
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I have no sympathy for her, as she has shown none for poor Allison, at least TM can get on ith her life and spend time with her kids, Allison can not. If she was being true to herself, she would of realised after a few months that Gerard was not going to leave and then she should of just ended it.

She pressured him, telling him to move out with her and let Allison get her own place, like Allison was some spanner in the works.

This case deeply affected, affects me, My first name is Allison, I am currently 43 and 2 of my kids are the same age as Allison's now, I think of my kids hugging me when they are sad, sick or tired..and I always think of Allison and her 3 girls, TM is upset for herself when if she had any decency or a brain, she would be thankful she is still here and spend the rest of her life being thankful she got away from such a monster...

I will never forget Allison, not just because she has the same name as me but because my kids will always be the same age as hers and this is something that TM has somehow been unable to fathom above her own feelings of selfishness..

For anyone who feels sorry for her watching her tears, I say this..What about the 3 girls crying for their mother who will never return, who have no choice but to go to jail to visit their father because of the stupid family court which we all know is flawed here in Australia...

Save your thoughts and sorrow for them instead of a selfish woman hurt by her own misfortunes instead of thinking of the 3 little girls with no PARENTS...
 
Snails said:
Oh yes indeed! There was a powerful Men's Rights push a decade ago and Family Law was overhauled and this is the result. :(
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I just want to add that until today, the girls father was innocent until proven guilty in the eyes of the law so the judge who has ordered they visit him had this to consider. If he insists on continuing to see them a judge has very different considerations now he is convicted of murdering their mother while they slept in the beds and left them alone while he dumped her body under a bridge. I just hope he doesn't put the Dickies through further family court applications.
 
Bobbie Elliott said:
Regarding Allison's girls contact with GBC - What dreadful psychopathology will the have to experience and display before experts can agree that visiting daddy is not in the girls best interest?? I'd go so far as to suggest that contact with the whole BC clan is not in their best interests. From what we know and have heard so far, it's likely that their mission will be to portray daddy as the victim in all of this and to impart the associated lies they use to support this.
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I am sure the Dickie's will be able to put forward a strong case in the girls defence re: visiting their murderous father in prison. They will show and prove via psychologists reports that jail visitation may not be in their best interests.
 
kiwijayne said:
Exactly.

I grew up in a house full of domestic violence. Luckily my my Mother got out with me but left my brother behind with Dad. When I reached my later teenage years I noticed the narcissistic traits in my whole family bar me. Three years ago after the quakes I made my break to Australia and left the controlling/ manipulative family behind. I survived that due to my resilience. Let's hope that the Dickie family are keeping instilling those resilience traits in those beautiful girls.

That's my story folks laid bare.
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Resilience is a rare and great thing KJ, so is strength, character and love. Cheers to your clean break and to representing all the above characteristics. If more people spoke out the taboo would be lessened.
 
Amee said:
Victim impact statements from Baden-Clay trial released

http://www.sunshinecoastdaily.com.a...statements-baden-clay-trial-released/2319384/
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Thank you Amee. I'm not sure if I'm missing something here but I don't seem able to access the entire statement. For example, Vanessa said "in this trial there has been an over-emphasis on the negative aspects of her life ... You and those around you created it for her ..." I think it was Vanessa too who made reference to no remorse and it being "business as usual" for GBC. (I am relying on some very hastily taken notes)
 
itsthevibe said:
Yes i do understand your points. But I am just so averse to affairs as i believe it is wrong, despite my past and probably current low self esteem i still wouldn't do it. I have no interest or sympathy for people who do. I also think your example below is far-fetched, despite low self esteem if she does have it, TM was a woman of the world, she had a career in property, she was not a little shrinking naive mouse with no experience or knowledge of anything. Everyone knows it's wrong to have an affair, and to me you'd always have to question a man who told the story you outline. Fall in love yes, be entranced with the charisma and the facade, feel sorry for the sob-story, yes, understandable, but at the end of the day most caring people would have a degree of cynicism about the extent of some of the story, even if you had fallen in love with the guy. Demonising the wife is such a ploy that generally there would have to be some concern surely. Unless of course you didnt care about the wife anyway - which is why I have no sympathy for her. Understand it, yes, but sympathy no because she didnt care about Allison or the girls, and takes no responsibility.
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Sadly not far fetched - it's standard procedure for sociopaths/narcissists.
The S I was involved with was 3 years divorced, but used a steady drip of poison against his ex wife, to make sure no one actually asked her what the REAL story was.

I have no doubt I'm now the evil, crazy ex according to him, and no one will think to ask me what really happened.
 
JK673 said:
No need to be upset
..his tears will have dried not long after he disappeared from public view and he will be thinking "how dare they!!!".... absolutely no sympathy here...
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I can totally see your point of view. But it's not how HIS mind works, and for that I've got (a touch) of empathy...
 
Tangled_Web said:
Thank you Amee. I'm not sure if I'm missing something here but I don't seem able to access the entire statement. For example, Vanessa said "in this trial there has been an over-emphasis on the negative aspects of her life ... You and those around you created it for her ..." I think it was Vanessa too who made reference to no remorse and it being "business as usual" for GBC. (I am relying on some very hastily taken notes)
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It is because of you that I stand here today without a sister.

It is because of you that I will never see her delightful smile again.

It is because of you that three young girls have no mother.

It is because of you that Allison will never get to see her children grow up.

It is because of you that numerous lives have been changed forever.

You have shown no remorse for Allison's death.

While Allison lay cold, wet and alone out in the elements under a bridge, you enjoyed sleeping in a warm bed, having lavish lunches, dinner dates and in your own words it was "business as usual" with no regard or concern for your missing wife or the future of three young girls who now face the future without their mother.

But I am not going to allow this statement to be all about you.

http://www.abc.net.au/news/2014-07-15/allison-baden-clay-family-victim-impact-statements/5598704
 
brizzymum said:
I can totally see your point of view. But it's not how HIS mind works, and for that I've got (a touch) of empathy...
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Do you know him? A lot of people thought they did. I have to disagree with you because I think, from what has been presented at trial, that it is EXACTLY how his mind works.
 
BJsleuth said:
According to that report just on ACA, he had told security guards at the court that he was going home so yes, I think he really did believe he'd get away with it.
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I think the family suffers from some sort of group delusion where they were all convinced he'd get away with it.
 
possumheart said:
Thanks. My ch 9 is malfunctioning and am a bit frustrated.

Talked to a colleague today who has a friend who works in the incoming part of G's new prison. Says he will be well medicated initially.
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I gather the idea of "medicating" him would be to calm and sedate him. IMO he does not deserve to be medicated. He should be fully conscious and feel every nuance of agony he has coming his way! To quote Mr Pinhead, "your suffering will be legendary, even in hell..."
 
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