Hello all. Long time reader buy made an account because this case hits close to home for a handful
or reasons. I did want to share a story about an incident that happened to me a few years ago just to illustrate that you honestly have NO idea how you would react in this situation and the people criticizing DM are killing me. On what planet does a 19 year old female, living in an extremely safe college town (per LE) think noise at 4am in her shared party house and seeing a man she doesn’t recognize = 4 of my closest friends have just been murdered?
I’m a professional woman in my 40’s (mom, husband, kids) and live in what you would consider an affluent suburb (leaning toward rural with 1+ acre lots) town. A few years ago I went for a run around 10am on a regular Tuesday. I was running down a main road at the edge of town where houses lined one side and forest lined the other. This was not a desolate road, there is traffic and borders a much more populated town.
As i was running a truck pulled up beside me and a somewhat friendly guy asked where the closest gas station. I stood back and told him to follow the road to one or he could turn around and follow another route. He thank me and continued down the road.
I changed direction and headed back on the same road (my planned route) and maybe 5 min later he had done the same and stopped me again. Said he was confused with my directions and asks again to the closest station. I repeated what i said and he thanked me and took off. I thought it was unusual but figured he was flirting or confused and I was on mine 8 and tired - it was late winter and I was getting cold so I was just focused on getting home and warm.
Until half a mile up the road, i saw he had pulled over to the side and was standing standing leaning on the hood of the truck. My initial
thought was sort of ‘huh? wonder why he stopped again?’ I wasn’t exactly scared, but it made me nervous. I crossed to the other side of the road and there happened to be a street into a neighborhood that I took instead of staying straight and running by him. I looked at him as I turned and he looked at me, waved and said ‘hey, good to see you again’. The neighborhood houses didn’t start for a bit so the road in was just woods. I looked back once i was in the sidestreet and he was back in his truck slowly following me.
At this point I knew this was not normal but I was confused and my mind sort of went blank because I couldn’t understand why someone would follow me. It didn’t make any sense to me. I was running like I always do. I sort of froze there in the middle of the street looking at him and trying to understand what was going on. He stopped the truck, got out, and started to jog towards me and by that point I was terrified and my mind just told me to RUN.
He followed me down the street and though one yard, maybe two, then stopped. I ran through a few more and then stopped and hid in a child’s playhouse in someone’s back yard. At that point I called my husbands cell which went to voicemail so I left him a sobbing message that I was chased and scared and didn’t know what to do. I waited in that little house freezing my *advertiser censored* off and scared out of mind for about an hour and then I ran home and locked myself inside. I look back at that day and can’t understand why I didn’t take a picture of the truck and license plate or call 911 or scream or bang on someone’s door. Even when I was hiding in the playhouse terrified my mind kept questioning if I made up with happened or it wasn’t as scary as I had thought. Maybe the guy just needed directions? The idea that someone may have been trying to take me or hurt me is just so hard for me to wrap my head around. It doesn’t ‘fit’ into my life. I ended up reporting the incident to the police but was beyond humiliated that I couldn’t think more clearly or strategically in the moment.
So, please be gentle to DM. We know a tiny portion of what happened that night and we should all hope to god we never experience a fraction of what she has had - and will have to process.