Thank you for your perspective and input, I always find the difference in family interaction fascinating behaviorally. It is very hard to stereotype any group of people’s behavior as a whole IMO, as perception can differ from one person to the next. When there are 5-6 people, I feel it is impossible to base research on any type of behavioral compartmentalization-I do my best to avoid stereotyping individual behavior and do my best to stoically interpret what I see in front of me (via tangible actions/facts/observations).
**(Begin differing personal experience growing up in the Deep South I want to address in my response but I personally feel is irrelevant in any investigation/sometimes a distraction from what we can observe tangibly)**
I grew up in the Deep South. My experience was a bit different (or perhaps my interpretation different, other members of the family different, other cultural microcosmic factors, etc). My parents/grandparents emphasized: honesty, loyalty, strength, independent thought, love/compassion/understanding, non-judgement, forgiveness, respect and *MANNERS*. I emphasized manners because I feel this is often mis-stereotyped about Southern culture (MOO, nothing is right or wrong FTR). For example, you don’t talk religion/politics/etc over the dinner table; you respect other’s homes; if you spill/break something (God forbid!) as a guest you clean it up and apologize; you don’t allow your children to run amok in another’s house, you teach them respect for others at a very young age.
Ironically, the reason I say I wouldn’t call my parents late at night unless an emergency personally, is due to these ingrained values; inconsideration is like a cardinal sin in the Deep South from my experience-but *it would never be inconsiderate to reach out to family when in crisis for help, regardless of the time.*
I grew up taught the total opposite-you ALWAYS have boundaries/respect for others/their time. Again, it is not disrespectful when you genuinely need help-in that case it’s a faux pas to NOT contact family and/or help family when they need help.
Personally, my family would do anything to help when asked and I would do the same for them. I can’t even fathom an aunt or uncle or cousin locking me out of the house when I had nowhere to go-much less my own parents/siblings-especially in the middle of the night. I was brought up taught to help others, even strangers-as long as you didn’t put yourself in danger/betray your own morals (I.e., you would call the police if you were witnessing a situation of DV in the front yard, 911 if someone is hurt, etc). I was taught to love others without judgement, “do unto others as you’d have them do unto you”, “two wrongs don’t make a right”, “actions speak louder than words”, etc….personally, I feel extremely grateful to have been taught these values growing up in the Deep South microcosm of my early childhood environment.
MOO cultural stereotypes are irrelevant in an investigation because they can differ greatly-from person to person, family to family, state to state, or even town to city in the same state.
With that being said, MOO there is nothing in this case that reminds me personally of “Southern values” as I know them from spending the majority of my life in the Deep South. In fact, most of the behavior I’ve observed in multiple individuals in this case, is the antithesis of what I would call stereotypical Southern behavior. I could dissect behavior by behavior but I’m not here to judge or infer about anyone’s cognitive mental process or the morality of their behavior.
Sometimes these same things can be used to demonize victims/investigative direction, victimize suspects, and manipulate/muddy perception of those with good intentions who’s only desire is to find the truth. IMO it is a distraction, as anything emotional can cloud stoic, objective, constructive, research/problem-solving.
**(End)**
MOO Observations are neutral. They aren’t sinister or innocent until proven otherwise. EK did not accuse her Dad (MK) of anything. If you are referring to the phone call mentioned in the doc where MK said his daughter was mad and blamed him, MK was talking about his other daughter-SK-who wasn’t interviewed publicly, hasn’t spoke publicly, lived with AK at the mother’s house at the time of her disappearance, and argued with AK the night of her disappearance according to EK in the transcript above.
Furthermore, if EK was understandably concerned due to drug use, she would have no reason to know that and lie that she wasn’t aware of it to investigators. If EK was lying about her knowledge of AK’s alleged drug use, how reliable would that make her other statements? Currently, I have no reason to disbelieve EK’s given statement that she was unaware of AK’s alleged drug use. From my recollection EK mentions her children at least twice, in E1 and E3, but I’m unsure how this part is related?
If the timeline isn’t fuzzy for you, could you please list the timeline?
AK’s phone has never been found, and her last location, first reported as at her mother’s, at 6:31am, was actually an unknown location. There is an article re: discrepancy of the timeline earlier in this thread.
I’m unsure what you mean re: “due to editing” of the JF-EK interview? Are you implying the doc edited part of the interview out? Wouldn’t more information be better than less? What motivation would the documentary crew have for leaving anything out? Re: my transcript of the interview-I paused the program for every line of interview subtitles, meticulously typing every word verbatim, please tell me if/where/timestamp something is incorrect so I can correct it.
The discrepancy I’m referring to in EK’s account is related to the interview with MK (link below) starting at 11:31min, MK says he advised EK to call her mother that night re: AK situation. When did EK talk to MK? I assume if he advised her and it was unexpected AK would show up it was via a phone call? MK says to his knowledge EK called her mother after their conversation. When did these conversations happen in the middle of the night? EK did not mention any phone calls in the transcript above in her account on that night; from my understanding, MK is implying EK had 2 conversations re: AK showing up seeking help, one with MK, one with her mother. Where does this fit in the timeline? Had MK advised EK before that night at some point?
To attempt to clarify the next part of your comment-AK lost her job, which was mentioned in the documentary, 2 different related newspaper clippings re: lay-offs from Humana (the company she worked for) were shown. AK was one of those lay offs, and understandably upset about being laid off. AK was described in the doc as professional and hard working, MOO her volunteer work with MIA helping people kept her busy while searching for another job.
Additionally IMO, I don’t care for the criticism, gossip, and judgement of NS/MIA/JF. I find it very odd, especially when observed in the manner I have observed it, is not constructive to finding AK. It is distracting when attempting to research in a group allegedly dedicated to finding AK. I asked for sources re: NS allegations and how it was applicable to finding AK? Someone very close to AK running the group dedicated to finding her, commented to “Google NS MIA”. I actually did this
and I the first (MOO) legitimate article I found about NS told a different narrative than what I perceive as unfounded, suspicious, character assassination of someone who has good intentions and volunteers to help people.
I’m providing that article from 2016 below. (Mods please snip/inform me of anything unacceptable as I’m still new to the rules).
I feel this is important to the investigation because of the abnormality of this type of destructive, cruel behavior/accusations towards others who care and are trying to help. It was also mentioned in E1 of the documentary. Is this coming from a place of high emotional distress about AK’s disappearance or as a means of sabotaging specific investigational directions?
Lastly, what did MK mean when he said SK told him to “be careful because EB knows people that can make you disappear”? Was that coming from a place of concern for MK’s well-being or was that a threat?
To clarify, in E4 “weak link” is the term MK said LMPD used to describe SK in relation to EB.
11:31min begin MK statement about EK/AK disappearance/advice
‘I’ve lost everything,’ says NJ woman devoted to missing person cases (2016)
“BRIDGEWATER — Eleven years ago,
Nancy Schaefer set out to help reunite families with her missing loved ones. Today, even though she's just lost her home and most of her possessions, she remains undeterred.
Schaefer, founder of
Missing in America, a volunteer group that’s helped law enforcement and families with hundreds of missing persons cases nationwide, was recently evicted from her Bridgewater apartment and is in the process of clearing out what little she has left.
As the founder of Missing in America, Schaefer — who left her accounting job two years ago — is also the sole funding source for the organization. The 45-year-old estimates that in the past decade, she's spent about $300,000 of her own money to continue helping families locate missing loved ones.
"You have to understand how passionate I am about this cause," she said.
Now, Schaeffer said she has a just a few days before she has to leave her apartment. She said that because she's in default on her rent payments, she also won't get back her security deposit, which has her sinking further into debt.
"It's been really rough, but I'm trying to remain strong," Schaefer said. "I've had to sell everything in yard sales, all my possessions, everything but my clothes."
But rather than use the money she made selling her belongings to help find a new home or get her own finances in order, Schaefer has decided to dedicate the funds to making Missing in America an official 501(c)3 charity organization.
As a temporary solution to her housing issue, Schaefer said she will be staying in Kentucky with the mother of a 19-year-old woman who went missing from Columbia University in May. LaCreis Renee Kidd's daughter was eventually located. Last month, she created a
******** page dedicated to helping raise money so Schaefer could get back on her feet. As of Monday, $2,170 of the $5,000 goal had been raised. Schaefer said she offered to give her landlord the funds, but her offer was declined and instead, she was told to vacate her apartment.
Schaefer said she doesn't want to move out of New Jersey and leave her children and family, but she's out of options at this point. She also said she will not take money from any of the families that she is currently assisting through Missing in America.
"I've been very committed to this cause for 11 years and you don't think about yourself when you're in this situation," Schaefer said. "I have lost everything for the cause, and I would do it all over again."
Toniann Antonelli is a social content producer for NJ 101.5. She can be reached at
toniann.antonelli@townsquaremedia.com, or on Twitter
@ToniRadio1015.
'I've lost everything,' says NJ woman devoted to missing person cases
I’m not thinking like that.