Matt Lauer fired by NBC, accused of "inappropriate sexual behavior"

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CARIIS said:
I think the speed at which they canned him indicates that public is going to learn about sexual behaviors that freak most out (S&M cross dressing orgies dominance gay etc etc)

Obscure sexual behaviors that middle america will freak out over -- we will see
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Now that I've thought about it, years ago when his wife filed for divorce she charged 'Cruel & Inhumane Treatment'. I may be an old fogy but S & M would certainly be cruel & inhumane treatment in my book.
 
faw720 said:
Oh I agree that co-workers couldn't know what went on behind closed doors but you would think they would surely have been suspicious when he spent so much time in his locked office especially since he was known for his many affairs. I've been in work environments where 'hanky panky' was going on & it wasn't a big secret to co-workers even though we didn't actually see a sex act itself. As far as Couric & Viera's joking relationship with Lauer..............it's not even safe to have a joking relationship in the workplace these days lest someone gets the wrong idea.

I still think Lauer 'picked' the wrong woman who just happened to have the right connections to get him taken down. Otherwise, why on earth would NBC fire the goose that laid the golden egg?
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They might not have known how much time (and when) he spent time in his closed office. They all have different meetings after the show, depending on what they're working on. The only way they could know if his door was locked was if they tried it themselves -or- someone mentioned it to them. Otherwise, a closed office door does not mean something untoward is going on in there. And there's no way to know what someone else is doing on their phone if you don't personally see it or they don't tell you.

I think it's unfair to expect coworkers to be psychic and 'know' what all someone else is doing, assuming they never personally saw anything and no one told them. I mean, HOW could they know? When I see managers at work with doors closed I don't think to myself, "I bet that guy/gal is sexually harassing someone in there."
 
faw720 said:
Now that I've thought about it, years ago when his wife filed for divorce she charged 'Cruel & Inhumane Treatment'. I may be an old fogy but S & M would certainly be cruel & inhumane treatment in my book.
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It could also be things like: criticizing her, especially in front of the children, name calling, lying to her about various things, gaslighting her, being controlling with money, yelling, leaving the marital home and not telling her where he is or where he is going....

It's not necessarily about sex and physical behaviors, is probably referring to psychological.
 
faw720 said:
Now that I've thought about it, years ago when his wife filed for divorce she charged 'Cruel & Inhumane Treatment'. I may be an old fogy but S & M would certainly be cruel & inhumane treatment in my book.
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BDSM involves a ton of trust and consent. If BDSM is done against the will of a participant, that's straight up assault and rape.
 
Madeleine74 said:
They might not have known how much time (and when) he spent time in his closed office. They all have different meetings after the show, depending on what they're working on. The only way they could know if his door was locked was if they tried it themselves -or- someone mentioned it to them. Otherwise, a closed office door does not mean something untoward is going on in there. And there's no way to know what someone else is doing on their phone if you don't personally see it or they don't tell you.

I think it's unfair to expect coworkers to be psychic and 'know' what all someone else is doing, assuming they never personally saw anything and no one told them. I mean, HOW could they know? When I see managers at work with doors closed I don't think to myself, "I bet that guy/gal is sexually harassing someone in there."
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It was not my intention to be unfair to his coworkers & I'm not even saying they should have known. I'm simply saying that with his adultery track record I'm surprised that they were surprised. Of course NBC may not have the same 'grapevine' as the Fortune 500 company that I worked for.

I worked for a defense contractor & our office was located adjacent to a SAC AFB & would have been a prime target for a nuclear attack. A coworker's husband worked his way up to a Vice President's position. Married couples do talk & we discovered in the event of a nuclear attack there was a nuclear bomb proof room for Vice Presidents ONLY. All the engineers, mid management, & peons could have been vaporized & the Vice Presidents would have survived & ready to start up again from scratch.

It was fairly common knowledge that anyone who was a Director or above received yearly bonuses, but we learned the hard way that it wasn't just yearly bonuses. I worked in the accounting department & was responsible for transferring foreign currency & there was a protocol that I had to follow. The first person whose approval was required was the person responsible for daily forecasts to corporate office. . The second person whose approval was required was the supervisor of Accounts Payable Dept. For some reason a payment had been delayed to the Turkish government & there was a Turkish General screaming bloody murder to the Program Office. The Program Office in turn was screaming at my Supervisor. My supervisor had to go out of town but he left me with written instructions to do whatever I had to do to get $6 million transferred to Turkey the next day. I followed protocol, got the permission I 'thought' I needed, & took a check to the bank. Thoughts will get you in trouble!!...............not only peon me, but 2 Managers & 2 Supervisors as well. It seems a bonus was due to the Director based on expenditures through that business day (end of a quarter). We all got screamed at & cussed out in a very public forum by the Director. I had to go to the bank & retrieve the offending check. Because of that public outburst everyone in the entire company knew when bonuses were due to be paid to the Directors. I was totally shocked that even Managers & Supervisors were not privy to this information. From that day forward I was officially called the '$6 million Woman' in the accounting department. Funny now, not so much then.
 
I'm simply saying that with his adultery track record I'm surprised that they were surprised
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Someone who cheats on their spouse is usually doing so in a consensual manner with another person or person(s) who are consenting to the relationship. Lauer had several 'relationships' of some duration with other women, often through work.

There's no correlation that a person who cheats on their spouse is also sexually inappropriate and sexually harassing various other people. They are different behaviors and different motives. One can be a harasser and not be married or in a relationship. One can be married, and cheat on their spouse, but never sexually harass anyone.

Lauer was doing both. I'm not surprised his coworkers are shocked by the hidden shadow side of Lauer. If he never acted that way towards them, around them, and no one ever told them about this behavior, they wouldn't have seen it and couldn't know about it. Of course they'd be surprised by that revelation.
 
His coworkers are not shocked--everybody knew about it--they had the reporter who broke this story on the Page 6 TV show and she said one of the Today show anchors spread gossip about it all the time.
 
So many coming forward with complaints of sexual harassment that occurred years ago. Why wasn’t a complaint made at the time? Did these women think that if they complied there would be something in it for them? This is what I think they believed and I think it was dumb of them to think this. When a man asks a woman to do something, like remove your shirt, and the woman does what he asks, she is consenting to the actions. If the woman doesn’t know what might follow, she needs an education. I was sexually harassed on the job in my 20’s, but back then you didn’t talk about it and it never involved a sex act or anything close to it. I just blew it off as a really old man trying to get his jollies.
 
faw720 said:
Another strange twist to this case. Allegedly Lauer thought the incident that resulted in his firing was consensual. How can an incident be both consensus & sexual harassment at the same time? Can anyone explain that? My curious mind wants to know.

https://www.msn.com/en-us/tv/celebr...th-his-kids-source-says/ar-BBGdDfC?li=BBnb7Kz
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The man might think it's consensual if the woman complies. The woman might comply but not consent. For example, if your boss suggests that sleeping with him will ensure you keep your job and get promoted and suggests that if you don't, he will make your life hell at work and perhaps fire you and smear your reputation so no one else will hire you, well....is that consensual?

These high-profile cases get attention, but this happens in everyday working situations and can be more damaging to the woman. If you're a single mom living in a small town and the boss coerces you into sexual acts - you are often stuck. You can't afford to lose the job, you might not have opportunities because of education or location to get another job, you have a reputation to protect, you don't want to be public about the incidents....you are often stuck. Is that consensual?

To deal with the situation, women might comply - which the man interprets as consensual. There are situations, of course, where the woman does indeed consent and is a willing partner. In those cases, it is unfair to later come back and say it was harassment. I agree with that. It can be hard to determine in hindsight what happened. However, in Matt's case, it seems very clear that what he did was wrong. The decision was made so swiftly after seeing something (a photo, I'm assuming) that he overstepped his bounds.

jmo
 
Gardenista said:
His coworkers are not shocked--everybody knew about it--they had the reporter who broke this story on the Page 6 TV show and she said one of the Today show anchors spread gossip about it all the time.
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About Lauer sexually harassing female coworkers, dropping trou to expose himself, sexting pics of himself? Everyone knew about that? Because that is different than Lauer cheating on his wife over most of their marriage, which is what most everyone knew, but that's not why he got fired.
 
IF this intern allowed or at least didn't mind Lauer sexting her and IF they had any sexual encounters AND she consented to them, then I don't understand why, after 3 years she is now claiming harassment. I'm *not* saying she consented or anything of the like. I'm saying *IF* she did or *IF* she continued some kind of personal/sexual dealings with Lauer then one must wonder at what point it was nonconsensual.
 
Madeleine74 said:
IF this intern allowed or at least didn't mind Lauer sexting her and IF they had any sexual encounters AND she consented to them, then I don't understand why, after 3 years she is now claiming harassment. I'm *not* saying she consented or anything of the like. I'm saying *IF* she did or *IF* she continued some kind of personal/sexual dealings with Lauer then one must wonder at what point it was nonconsensual.
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Because if someone very senior and very powerful asks you to do something, then you either have a choice of saying "yes" and playing along, or saying "no" and maybe/probably being shown the door. That goes for actual work and it even goes for sexual encounters. She may think she had a choice but it wasn't much of one, I'm guessing holding an internship at a major network show is a big deal on a resume and if she lost it, she'd have to talk about a pretty painful experience every time someone asked why she didn't complete her internship (or she could lie which isn't good either.)

And Lauer would have known this, or should have.
 
Madeleine74 said:
IF this intern allowed or at least didn't mind Lauer sexting her and IF they had any sexual encounters AND she consented to them, then I don't understand why, after 3 years she is now claiming harassment. I'm *not* saying she consented or anything of the like. I'm saying *IF* she did or *IF* she continued some kind of personal/sexual dealings with Lauer then one must wonder at what point it was nonconsensual.
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I've wondered the same thing. Perhaps she expected more out of the relationship other than a fling & was bitter when it didn't develop into her expectations. IF that was the case perhaps she decided that now, with all the other outings of sexual abuse, she decided now was the time to get her revenge. Of course I don't know but that is just a random thought floating through my brain. "Hell hath no fury like a woman scorned".
 
PaulR said:
Because if someone very senior and very powerful asks you to do something, then you either have a choice of saying "yes" and playing along, or saying "no" and maybe/probably being shown the door.
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This was 3 years ago, not 40 years ago. Sexual harassment prevention and training is mandatory in corporations, NBC included. Even for interns. There are clear guidelines for how to report such a thing, who to report it to, even anonymously if necessary. There is *nothing* a senior exec can force an employee to do that is illegal AND get away with it. It just requires telling someone -- someone in HR, another manager, someone. Staying silent never gets the proper resolution to a harassment issue. And this particular intern had pictures of Lauer exposing himself that HE sent to her. NBC and other large corporations have policies that protect any employee or contractor of the company from retribution from reporting something illegal or against company policies. Harassment is against every public company's policies. It's a huge potential litigation issue and believe me when I say it is taken seriously if reported AND there's clear proof.
 
From a source about NBC: "They protected the s— out of Matt Lauer.”
 
Don't forget this intern wasn't the only one he harassed. There's allegedly the employee who complained about receiving a sex toy with a note about what he wanted to do to her with it, and allegedly the employee who was summoned to Lauer's office where he (again, allegedly) sexually assaulted her. It wasn't just one incident and it wasn't just one person.

But again, IF no one speaks up then others can't know and can't do anything about it. I hope that is the big lesson everyone at a minimum takes away from all these various reports coming out in the media. If someone does something to you or makes you feel uncomfortable or they've crossed a line, even someone powerful, document it and tell someone who can help.
 
I also hope people learn what constitutes sexual harassment vs someone who is maybe interested but is not actually crossing a line. There is a difference.

It's not illegal or against a company policy to be attracted to someone else or interested in them. It comes down to how one behaves and what one chooses to do, if anything, about those feelings.

Lauer crossed many lines with several women. By not getting 'caught' or having one of his victims report what he did, he got away with his behavior and felt emboldened by it, apparently for years.
 
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