Hi Allie, I usually just lurk. But, (there is always a but.....) I have to comment!! you see I am an adoptive parent, of two children (both grown now) Our Son was born in El Salvador and we now know he was sent here illegally and his adoption probably wasn't legal ( legal here but not there)HOWEVER it probably was done for the best as he was very abused, and was 6 when we got him into our family. Our Daughter is Korean and we adopted her as an infant. So, thats my back ground....let me just say,my Daughter who never ever had any desire to know or even hear about her bio family. Now since having a child of her own wants answers! She wants back ground. And, so would I! Yes, I will admit it is scarey. But would I ever try and stop her? NO WAY! She wants to know why her Mom abandoned her ( out of pure love I believe, her hands are deformed and over there her life would have been real hard) But more then that she wants to know genetics and things like that. So, I just wanted to throw these thoughts your way and let you know....if its in your heart and you feel the need to know. You have that right! I personally can not imagine trying to stop my child from seeking the answer he/ she wants/ needs..........good luck and if I can help you sort these feelings/ thoughts please feel free to ask. Please understand I am in no way saying anything against your adoptive family. I just have a real problem with you feeling guilty because they "did so much". THATS what parents do! NO matter if a child is adopted or bio. Good Luck!