Nicole Kidman

[Jules]

Nanandjim your argument does seem plausable but if that was the case wouldn't most mothers take up residence near their children?

Nicole owns homes in Australia (has for years), Nashville and LA. She has been in Australia for the past several months filming a movie there. When in the States, she splits her time between LA and Nashville. She sees her kids lots. They spent a majority of the time over the summer in Australia with her and when she is in the States, they are often with her - be it Nashville or LA. Nicole has always been a private person - she just doesn't drag the kids out for photo opts when she has them like Tom does.

Also, part of Keith's recovery was to spend time with her kids as well. He spent quite a bit of time with them in Australia over the summer.

JMO of course.

 

[Amraann]

I think your dislike of Scientology influences your thoughts on the subject. Plenty of people raise their kids is Scientology - that doesn't mean they don't love their kids.

I think Nicole is a more private person (and parent) than Tom and so we don't see as many public pictures of her with them. Like I said in an earlier post, I've always gotten the feeling that she and Tom are good parents.

I remain firm in my stance that it is ignorant to imply that a person would love an adopted child less than a child that came from their body.

Those people are usually Scientologist's themselves and IMO it does mean they don't love their children.
If you have read how Scientologist's treat their children you to would question why anyone would agree to such a thing.

I do not see it a good parenting move to marry a drug addict when she already had children.
The exception to that would maybe be if he had a long history of stable recovery which he clearly did not and I don't believe he was clean when she married him.


Jules based on her own words the children prefer to be with their dad.
I just find that very odd.

 

[southcitymom]

Those people are usually Scientologist's themselves and IMO it does mean they don't love their children.
If you have read how Scientologist's treat their children you to would question why anyone would agree to such a thing.

I do not see it a good parenting move to marry a drug addict when she already had children.
The exception to that would maybe be if he had a long history of stable recovery which he clearly did not and I don't believe he was clean when she married him.


Jules based on her own words the children prefer to be with their dad.
I just find that very odd.

I hear you about the long history of stable recovery and marrying an addict thing, though I don't think it's bad parenting to make that decision.

When I was 13 and my parents were divorced, I went to live with my Dad. I prefered it. I still saw my Mom a lot and was close with her. My second younger sister lived with my Mom. She prefered it and she still saw my Dad alot. My 3rd younger lived with my Mom for a while and then went to live with my Dad. My sisters and I are all close with both parents today as adults. So I don't think it's odd for kids to do that and for parents to accept that.

I've read a lot about Scientology and we had a big thread about it here several months ago that was very interesting. It's not my thing, but it works for some people.

As for how some of the Scientologists might treat their children - I don't like how some of the priests in the Catholic Church treated the children, but I'm not going to roundly dismiss Catholicism because of it. Like Scientology, Catholicism works for some people.

Perhaps I would feel differently if I was bothered by Scientology.

 

[JDB]

When you marry a recovering addict, you take those chances. They might stay clean, like my husband has done, or they might relapse, like her husband did. But she couldn't have forseen the relapse.

I actually think it's a good thing to expose children to people in recovery from addiction.

Are not we all addicted to something?yes keith had a relapse that oftens happens. He paid his price for it also.And Nicole was right by his side when he went back in. She supported him the way a spouse should.ANd like Jules siad part of Keith cleaning up his act and getting off of drugs was to be with her kids .I saw the man in concert a few months ago. He talked very open about his addiction. And Thank God for Nicole. He basically said if she and her kids were not in his life . He more then likely would be dead.
My step son was addicted to drugs for all to many years. He hit rock bottom and now is a Missionary in the Honduras. Some people have to go all the way down before they can come up.

 

[eve]

It is a good thing kids are more forgiving about substance abuse than some of us are, apparently! It is a real-life problem and probably one that they will eventually encounter, and knowledge, personal or otherwise, tends to have an up side as well. I highly doubt Nicole subjected her children to danger via Keith's relapse. I think their honesty and speed in dealing with his relapse was admirable. I also like her loyalty to her vows. We could use more of that.

I think Tom is so incredibly dominant and controlling that her relationship w/ C and I was affected as a result after the divorce. I think he would have fought her tooth and nail had she tried to, say, take the kids to Australia for any length of time. I feel bad for her about that but she probably did what she had to do to keep the peace and keep the communication lines open.

The Scientology must be hard for a devout Catholic and I think led to their divorce in many ways, too. I wonder when it will be too much for Katie. I would never be able to tolerate it, I admit.

I hope she and Keith have luck with having their own baby.

Eve

 

[tennessee]

So, lets say the husband is Catholic and the mother is Jewish (which has happened before), which religion should the children be raised? There are lots of families with mixed religion.

 

[fundiva]

Nicole owns homes in Australia (has for years), Nashville and LA. She has been in Australia for the past several months filming a movie there. When in the States, she splits her time between LA and Nashville. She sees her kids lots. They spent a majority of the time over the summer in Australia with her and when she is in the States, they are often with her - be it Nashville or LA. Nicole has always been a private person - she just doesn't drag the kids out for photo opts when she has them like Tom does.

Also, part of Keith's recovery was to spend time with her kids as well. He spent quite a bit of time with them in Australia over the summer.

JMO of course.

I couldn't agree more. Tom is filming in Germany right now and I don't pics of the children with him there either. Just an FYI, part of the culture in Australia is that they have a school system where the kids go all year and a lot of them go to boarding schools (just like England). Just because these kids are living where they go to school and have a long distance relationship with their parents does not mean that the parents are not good parents and don't love them. We need to remember that not every country or nationality share our views on how to raise kids.

 

[Amraann]

So, lets say the husband is Catholic and the mother is Jewish (which has happened before), which religion should the children be raised? There are lots of families with mixed religion.

The difference being that Scientology is not a religion .... it is a cult created by a science fiction writer!

 

[TheShadow]

Well many people think the same about all religions. Only the sci fi writers of the "other books" lived a few thousand years ago. Let's not turn this into a big religious debate.

I think it is normal for kids to want to live with whatever parent they feel lets them get their way, or gives them more positive attention and less discipline. And Nicole, mother or not, has no right to demand that her children spend more time with her than their father. He is a parent and has equal rights and , presumably, equal love for his children. Most jurisdictions give children their choice of which parent to live with after age 12 or, in some places, 14.

 

[iNTERESTEDWOMAN]

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,295647,00.html

Does anyone besides me think its darn odd that Nicole said this...

"Even though she remains a devout Catholic, Kidman said the two kids she adopted with Cruise — Bella, 14, and Connor, 12 — are being raised Scientologists.
They have joint custody, but Kidman admitted Bella and Connor prefer Los Angeles and being close to Dad."



Its like she adopted them for him not to be a mom????

I think they are both unfit parents. They are both totally needy, and care more about their personal desires than the well being of their kids. Nichole jumps from man to man, marries a junkie, and can't understand why he fell off the wagon, (Oh, I didn't know there was a risk of that...NOT!) What a brilliant Mother. Tom shacks up, knocks up and THEN marries a girl young enough to be his kid. Ghee, what a great Dad and role model. Weird how Scientology says it's okay to have premarital sex, okay to shack up, but you can only take vitamins to combat depression. I am not sorry to say that when 2 people make a conscience decision to have children, (wether biological or adopted), those kids should be their life. Romance should be the last thing on their minds, and their children should come first...It is not their right to have children, it is their PRIVELEDGE, and they need to take the job seriously. Those 2 older kids take the back seat to who ever is in their parents bed.

Okay, now flame me

 

[wildTrose]

I dont feel Nichole jumped from man to man....its called dating! you dont settle with the first person you date....its like gardening...you have to pull alot of weeds sometimes to find the flower!
your also saying they should not have romance....and put the kids first, there is nothing wrong with dating when you have children! its when you have a revolving bedroom door with the kids in the next room then its wrong!

 

[reportertype]

I dont feel Nichole jumped from man to man....its called dating! you dont settle with the first person you date....its like gardening...you have to pull alot of weeds sometimes to find the flower!
your also saying they should not have romance....and put the kids first, there is nothing wrong with dating when you have children! its when you have a revolving bedroom door with the kids in the next room then its wrong!

I agree; parents are still human beings. I remember seeing pics of Nic's kids with Tom when they were still together. She's not photographed nearly as much as he is. I don't think Keith Urban's addiction automatically makes him a bad person/parent anymore than I think Nicole is horrible for marrying him.

 

[iNTERESTEDWOMAN]

I dont feel Nichole jumped from man to man....its called dating! you dont settle with the first person you date....its like gardening...you have to pull alot of weeds sometimes to find the flower!
your also saying they should not have romance....and put the kids first, there is nothing wrong with dating when you have children! its when you have a revolving bedroom door with the kids in the next room then its wrong!

Why does she NEED TO DATE? Why can't she raise her kids. WHY is she SO needy she HAS to have a man? She had a man, didn't want him...got another one. She should have gotten that all worked out BEFORE she had children. This is why kids are so screwed up today. Their parents think with their genitals.

Lonely you say? SHE HAS KIDS.
Needs affection? SHE HAS KIDS
Needs someone to tell her she's beautiful? READ HER FANMAIL.

 

[southcitymom]

Why does she NEED TO DATE? Why can't she raise her kids. WHY is she SO needy she HAS to have a man? She had a man, didn't want him...got another one. She should have gotten that all worked out BEFORE she had children. This is why kids are so screwed up today. Their parents think with their genitals.

Lonely you say? SHE HAS KIDS.
Needs affection? SHE HAS KIDS
Needs someone to tell her she's beautiful? READ HER FANMAIL.

Kids should not be used to fill your loneliness, your need for affection or your desire to be told you're beautiful. That's incestuous.

A person does not stop becoming a person once they have kids. There is, of course, nothing wrong with dating when you have kids.

 

[nanandjim]

It is my impression that Nicole dated very rarely. I believe that she is a very good and loving mother. I have seen her on talk shows, even right after Tom had walked out on her, and she refused to say anything bad about him. She always commented that they had children that she needed to consider.

 

[kelly london]

i personally find it very odd that katie holmes is raising nicole's kids. there used to be many pictures of bella and connor, but since the little princess has arrived, i've seen none - not even a mention of those kids. i wonder if they are feeling like a step-child?

 

[southcitymom]

i personally find it very odd that katie holmes is raising nicole's kids. there used to be many pictures of bella and connor, but since the little princess has arrived, i've seen none - not even a mention of those kids. i wonder if they are feeling like a step-child?

Well, new babies always upstage the older kids - that's just the way of the world.

I've always felt that Bella and Connor enjoyed a certain amount of anonymity in light of who their parents were. They may relish that privacy at their age - I know I would have.

I don't think Katie raises Nicole's children, though she certainly has a hand in it - as does any stepmother that kids of divorce live with. My stepmother certainly helped raise me.

 

[OneLostGrl]

I have not one doubt in my mind that the "church" and/or Tom have threatened Nicole with something.. they are hanging something over her head, that is why she has just more or less handed over her children to Tom.

Flame me, choose not to believe me, hate me, call me an idiot who has no idea what I'm talking about but I'd bet my home AND my land on it.

 

[narlacat]

I have not one doubt in my mind that the "church" and/or Tom have threatened Nicole with something.. they are hanging something over her head, that is why she has just more or less handed over her children to Tom.

Flame me, choose not to believe me, hate me, call me an idiot who has no idea what I'm talking about but I'd bet my home AND my land on it.

I would too.

There is no other explanation, she got herself out but knew she had no chance of getting the kids out.

 

[narlacat]

--agree Amraann--I don't get that either but perhaps she gave in to Cruise instead of arguing with him about it all the time--But I wonder if these kids were not adopted,would she feel the same way about letting them be raised by a cult? The situation could be much different if these 2 kids were her own flesh and blood

I've wondered that myself.

Being adopted myself though, has probably made me cynical.