Two things. While I agree the brazilian family isn't going to shut up and put this childs interests first, I HOPE the media attention will die down and this 9 year old child won't have to read every last detail about what happens with the bitter custody battle from here on out online.
Also, my son is 7. His dad saw him a half dozen times at most between birth and age 18-24 mos. Nothing until age 4, then he was flighty for a year. It's only been the last 28 months or so he's been an active dad. For approximately the first year- year and a half my son NEVER called him dad, and always refered to him by his first name. We both allowed our son to start calling him dad in his own time, when he was comfortable doing so.
I'm sorry to say this, but David needs to keep from airing his personal disappointments now with the media and allow his son time to adjust to this in the time his son is comfortable. There is no right or wrong time for Sean to adjust to this. I'm not saying David does not have every right to be disappointed and hurt, BUT, he need to step back and NOT share those personal feelings with the media because it isn't helping his son in the least to be doing so. If anyting, he needs to be sharing them PRIVATELY with either a therapist, or a close supportive friend.
The best thing David could do, is do only what he has control over, and keep this reunion and adjustment from becoming a media circus and scrutinizing every last detail of every step these two go through while becoming reacquainted. I hope for Seans sake, the media dies down within the next week or so.
jmo as a single parent putting my childs best interests first and letting his feelings supercede my own as the adult.
David was
not airing his personal disappointment with Sean not calling him Dad. He was simply answering a question. Veira asked "has he called you dad yet?" and he replied, "No, not yet. He really hasn't called me anything yet." Sort of explaining that Sean was working through how to address him. When asked, David said, "Yeah, I call him son, buddy, Sean."
On a related topic, some have criticized David for working with NBC and airing any footage of Sean at this point. But, I think he has been VERY discreet with airing footage of his son and judicious with his comments.
I completely understand why he is involved with the media at all. There are several reasons. First, this is a common tactic for families who want privacy when faced with a case of national or even international fame and interest. Think Elizabeth Smart, Jaycee Dugard, Shawn Hornbeck. They know the media will continue to invade their privacy and hound them. They know that without being given a bone, the public or their enemies will be free to frame events the way they want to. Thus, by giving one or two outlets exclusive access to the story, they can control how the sotry is framed and they can limit the intrusiveness of a media hungry for info.
Th opposite of this is Tiger Woods who remained silent. The media thus dug deep and boy did they find a lot! I know it is a different situation but just an example of what can happen when you don't play ball with the media in a high profile case.
Second, there remain 65 or so children illegally held in Brazil, not to mention thousands of children kidnapped to other countries. David Goldman fought tirelessly for five and a half years for his little boy. He prevailed but I have no doubt that he feels a sense of responsibility towards the remaining left behind families. Allowing public access to his painful journey is a way to keep such issues in the public's mind, it allows those left behind to feel hope and it allows foreign governments to see that all can be well when a kidnapped child is returned. He is being honest with the struggle and truthful with the success so far of his reunion with Sean. He is allwoing the world to see that the U.S. and Brazil made the right decision. He is a smart man working with intelligent advisors and I applaud him.
Finally, David has been very generous in his comments and actions surrounding Sean's Brazilian family. He hugged Bruna at the exchange and promised her he would not do to her what she did to him. He has been very lowkey in his comments, simply saying he felt upset by how they paraded Sean through the streets and that he will never understand their motivations. Believe me, he could have said much more. He was victorious and now has nothing to lose. Given that, his restraint is remarkable.
