RSBM
This post is so helpful! Just wanted to add though, I should go find the post but I don't think I have time, I recall that attached to this statement she then added that all of these questions are 'hypothetical' ie she could not confirm that the lie detector was indeed passed, nor any of the other items. Just wanted to mention that because I don't think we've ever had anyone, not GR, not LD, no other insiders or MSM, state that the lie detector was passed.
Fringles, you are correct. We never got confirmation that he passed. Her answer was that he took a lie detector test and if he failed, wouldn't they have him take another one? Lots of dancing around questions..
:waitasec:
Originally Posted by Lavanda Dolce
"Important thoughts to Ponder"
Let's, for a moment, take a path of possibilities with me...for those who wish to follow along here to help me find some answers or thoughts.
My belief: (also note my beliefs can vary...but are along the same line.)
I personally do not believe JR made it to the mall. Merely because of the locations of the cell phone and van.
→I do not know if JR truly intended to go to the mall or if that was where she was telling JR she was going.
Possible reasons? Numerous. Here are some examples:
→Being that it was around Christmas time
even I have "lied" and said I was going to a large outlet mall but in reality I actually drove to a specialty store in Maine (out of state) to buy my husband's snowmobile helmet a few years ago. I couldnt tell him the truth of where I was going...else it would have spoiled his Christmas gift.
→Did JR use the mall as a reason to meet someone from online? This would give nearly 5 hours of "accountable time" to her family and the chance to meet, and maybe innocently enough someone she could meet that is "outside" of her normal circles and "outside" of all the traveling that she did with her husband for his interests, someone she played gaming with? Someone that she could meet that was "her friend" and nobody elses. (If that makes sense.) We all know they did a lot of travel from photos. A lot of family activities and a lot focused around her husband's passion
not necessarily her own as she had bad feet with metal that prohibited her from running. She also battled weight. Not to say she was obese in any way
but it is difficult to be a bit overweight and live with someone who is extremely fit and extremely active. So maybe this was a friend "for her" that she wanted to meet. Does not mean it was "an affair" or anything along that line
just a meeting that could have gone astray. The person was LOOKING for a vulnerable woman.
→In my view and in my eyes
Jennifer was extremely vulnerable. She was battling health issues that is hard to explain to anyone around her "in real life" (family, friends, etc.) without them thinking she is a hypochondriac. (which many do when someone is diagnosed with fibromyalgia and other related auto immune conditions.) How are very fit and active friends going to react? The same as most doctors. Excercize more, eat less. Trust me. The last words someone who lives with problems wants to hear that it is "their fault" because basically that is how one perceives that kind of "advise." I see in some photographs such an in-depth look of sadness (that is very deep) and I don't think even Jennifer understood it. I think it goes hand in hand with her vulnerabilty of a multitude of things. I don't think Jennifer truly felt "she belonged." Does this reflect the love she has for her family or they for her? Absolutely not. This is an "inner feeling" I believe she felt and struggled with. I've seen it before. Many times. I feel she did not "feel the approval" around her that she needed for Jennifer. (That's not to say she didn't get the approval
she didn't "feel" it.) So for years she found ways of getting that approval by doing what she knew best and could get that approval through her excellent parenting, cooking, art, and knitting. But no matter how good
it was not comforting to Jennifer that Jennifer WAS good. There are no awards or blue ribbons for being a great mother.
Note that in may cases those that suffer from some of the insecurities that she may have felt would STILL feel this even when their spouses assure them all of the time of their beauty, their goodness and conveys their love for them. This is something "deep" that can only be resolved by the person themselves. Many have said over and again that Jennifer is a wonderful and loving mother. We've heard GR say things suddenly changed. What changed? My personal opinion? I think things came crashing when she was losing some of the "control situations" that she created in order to love herself and somehow saw "normal life changes" as something she was "losing."
Example. Daughter is growing older. Child no longer wants to wear a knitted hat / matching scarf to school as it is not "in style" as to the kinds the other kids wear. I also saw a photo of Jenn's daughter in a race
taking on a joy that dad likes. Child is starting to bond with outside friends and their parents. Starting to become a young woman and finding herself and her own interests. Perhaps bonding closer to her mom's friends, or her grandparents. Things that someone who is insecure is not going to clearly understand.
Jennifer has a personality of more "dream-like" as opposed to "realistic." Interest in scifi, interest in fantasy games
things she can create and develop to her liking as opposed to "attempting to be like others around her" in life because I believe she feared that she would fail. Just like she felt she "failed" to convince doctors there IS something wrong. Failed that she couldn't run due to her feet surgery, but would dress to "fit in" and give the appearance she may be a runner
to fit in. Another sign of insecurity and vulnerability. She probably didn't play Farmville for she was "tired of having to meet others expectations" and if her farm was not as thriving as the next person it would be defeat in her own self. Playing sci fi and fantasy games is about challenges and creativity of which she was very good. Something that nobody around her does. It was something for Jennifer that Jennifer could do, feel comfortable and feel she "belonged."
→God forbid, but if someone caused Jennifer harm
I do not believe for a minute that it was anyone around her that knows and loves her. I believe if someone caused her harm
it was from a planned encounter that could have gone astray because Jennifer is/was vulnerable and may have given off the wrong message to the wrong person.
→Or. As has happened to many others, and unless we are in their shoes, we will never understand the feeling of "not being any use to anyone" or "everyone is better off without me" or "I didn't fit in with them anyhow and they will get over me quickly." This is the exact reason that I stress the importance for all to leave messages on Jennifer's wall that it is "OK" to come home. It is "ok" with their peers, children and family
because they all do love and her and will work with her to help her see she is wanted, needed and loved very much.
