Steven Alexander please come forward
my name is SA - TA was my big brother - i was sleeping in after working 12 hr grave yard shift . . . woke to my wife crying walking up stairs talking on phone - say Samantha I cannot tell him - you tell him . . .Samantha said Steven Travis is dead.
i remember walking out the back door screaming - crying to sky asking why - sank down into corner - awhile later my commander called - i kept my composure - soon as hung up i broke down - thought my brother was bullet proof - stronger than any thing - couldn't ing - be cut down or knocked down, 2 motorcycle crashes, wrecked cars, rolled snowmobile - he wa unbreakable . . who would do this . . . he wanted to do better in life and move forward - why him . . how much did he suffer, scream? what was he say what was last thing he saw, final thought . . last time i saw brother Xmas 2007 - good time - family there - played family games - american idol game - TA kept beating everyone - i sang kelly clarkson song in high girl voice - he said it doesn't count because it is a girl song - he got meet my daughter and hold her fir first time - he said she was most beautiful little girl he had ever seen - never thought that would be last time i would see him
(JA crying)
major impact on my - invaded my dreams - nitemares about someone going after me with a knife and then wife and daughter - scream in my sleep - may sound childish - can't sleep alone in dark anymore - thoughts of my bro curled up and thrown in shower left for days . . . don't want these nightmares anymore - don't want to see his murderer anymore - hospitalized for ulcers - several different anti-depressants none of which really worked - haven't been husband i could have been - wife and i separated 2 years ago - passed my little girl back and forth every week - i go home to california and every week i return to california i have to see my little girl cry and beg me not to go . . i miss them very much i want to get back to them
TA used to write his day out on a flash card - last one he wrote to call me i never got that call - he worried about my health - he wanted to fly and help me quit smoking - i never got that
now i have to go visit a place that is 8' long and 6' deep
he was meant to do something so much more - never got to live dreams or meet his goals - in 2008 he wrote affirmations on his blog . . . this year will be the best year of life = year eclipse all others, learn more, travel more, give more, . . . than any other year of my life - year of metamorphsis . . impossible will become common place.
raise myself . . . . how will do i do this - compassionate service, unconditional love, blessings and gratitude in my heart - when i fail - i will learn from my mistakes - improve finances - work harder, smarter, challenge self - succeed thru integrity . . . exponentially greater asset to this world - love, serve more, forgive more, remind self of these thoughts daily - envision accomplishment until they become real - new quests and goals to change this world - published author - better my life and others . . associate with others be a teacher as well as a student - travel country and gain riches - find eternal . . enhances me exponentially
2008 will be the best year of my life - which will lay forground of 2009 . . . this year best year i will succeed.
know TA only hoped he could change one life - never thought he could change the world - people across the world . . . we all have different lives and trials - TA has a legacy - you were born to be great - it is your destiny - difference between ? and stumbling block . . .
he was so brutally ripped out of this world - my world - hopefully one day