I, for one, couldn't agree with you more. I'm always shocked by how many people still think corporal punishment is ok.
You're right in that when we make a mistake at a new job, our supervisor doesn't get to hit us. . .you know. . .for our own good. If a husband and wife are standing on a curb and the wife steps out while a car is still coming, the husband might yell and grab her, but he doesn't get to hit her afterwards. . .you know. . .so she learns not to do that anymore. It's funny how we can see how ludicrous the reasoning is in these situations, but it's somehow still accepted by some when it comes to children.
Never mind that we KNOW that punishment is the least effective form of behavior modification. It just doesn't work very well. IMO, all it really does is teach the child avoidance, e.g. don't get caught! With small children the effects are even worse. It breaks their trust, reinforces that they are powerless, and that people that are bigger than them, can hurt them.
I'm not trying to chastise anyone for their beliefs, but I do wish that parents would analyze their thinking and give it some real introspective thought. IMHO, when you know better, you do better.
What's even more crazy is that in the boss/employee or husband/wife scenario, at least the person being hit would be at somewhat close in size to the person doing the hitting. I am very much against corporal punishment. I think it's crazy that a full grown adult feels it is necessary to strike a tiny child for any reason. To the child, the helplessness, fear and shame that arises from an angry and much larger adult using their large hands on the child, to cause pain, no matter how slight the pain, is pretty real. The psychological aspect of it is often worse than the physical aspect.
And yeah, many kids got spanked growing up and didn't suffer discernible negative affects from it and many parents spank their kids and are good parents who mean well.
But our prisons are filled with adults who got spanked as children.
To me, the number of children who suffered as a result of corporal punishment justifies ending the practice, IMO.
As I've said before, I was a preschool teacher for years before eventually finishing my education and becoming a lawyer. I handled 6-12 tiny kids in a classroom quite well without ever hitting one of them. If I could handle 6-12, why can't some parents handle 1?
It's really not that hard to control behavior, generally. Clearly set out rules that are age appropriate and firm consequences when the rules aren't followed ("oh, you're going to flop to the floor in the store because I won;t buy you something? We're going home then. Cart left in the middle of the aisle, and you won;t get to go with mommy next time."), but even more important, having routines and showing enthusiasm for certain tasks - "Guess what? It's time for us to go brush our teeth!!!! Let's see how well you can do it! Show me!" (uttered in an enthusiastic voice) - praising kids for doing what they were supposed to do - "Good job brushing your teeth!!!!!", and understanding the developmental needs of children (yeah, your two year old does not want to be overstimulated all day at Disneyland or kept up late shopping or in a theater at an adult move), that's how you raise kids who do what they are supposed to do and don't act like creeps while they do it.
I see parents too often expecting their kids to totally adapt to the adults' needs and then acting totally surprised that the child is acting up. Sure, it;s not easy to leave a restaurant with your bratty kid and make them sit in the car while everyone else gets to enjoy their food, or, to go home, when you've just ordered a lovely dinner, or are at a friend's home enjoying yourself (especially if you're a single parent), for example. But you do it a couple times and the kids start acting like angels after that. They learn and not through fear of physical pain and domination by someone larger than them. :twocents:
P.S. Many of the kids in my classes that were the most unruly were ones whose parents used corporal punishment on a regular basis.
