GUILTY Turkey - Sarai Sierra, 33, NY woman murdered, Istanbul, 21 Jan 2013 - #2

[necco]

If I ever go missing, God forbid, I fear you'll have a trail to follow that makes Sarai's look simple in contrast.

I just messaged someone the EXACT same thought. I'd be a double agent for the KGB, an anarchist, a smuggler, a prostitute and possibly having a torrid affair with a yeti! :floorlaugh:

 

[looking4answers]

Me - I know women who do this regularly. I am a woman who has done this myself, minus photography (I have a different hobby) and I have met many, many women, mothers, wives who do this as well. There are thousands of us. We have forums for this. Look up "solo female travel" and read the hundreds of blogs with thousands of followers specifically geared toward just this exact thing. Mothers, wives, single women in their 20's - 60's all doing this, all the time.

It is NOT rare. I don't know how many other ways to say this. I do it and I belong to facebook groups and blogs of other women who do as well.

I have never been to Disney with my children in my life. It costs more than an overseas trip.

I know that this case might be the first time some people have looked into the world of solo female travel, but that does not mean it's weird, or rare, or dangerous, or sketchy, or that it defies belief.

It is very normal and very, very common.

Ami, thought this would interest you, a fellow Woman/Mother solo traveller, who writes a couple of blogs, and a write up by her on Sarai, just posted now:

http://www.huffingtonpost.com/teres...r-sarai-sierra-and-solo-travel_b_2618523.html

 

[Yellow]

I consider a 9 and 11 year old young children. This was not a walkabout this was thousands of miles across the Atlantic *and may I add to visit people she met online who could present themselves to be anyone...that scenario to me is ridiculous when you add the young children and shall I say husband.

An 11 and especially 9 year old child need constant supervision, you cannot leave them alone in the house, etc. you would need someone to prepare meals, supervise homework, get ready for school, wash cloths, etc. That is a pretty big imposition on another family for 3 weeks. I could see a few days, maybe a week, but 3 weeks is a long time,,

Teenagers maybe could be left but kids in elementary or middle school still need alot of parent involvement..

 

[necco]

An 11 and especially 9 year old child need constant supervision, you cannot leave them alone in the house, etc. you would need someone to prepare meals, supervise homework, get ready for school, wash cloths, etc. That is a pretty big imposition on another family for 3 weeks. I could see a few days, maybe a week, but 3 weeks is a long time,,

Teenagers maybe could be left but kids in elementary or middle school still need alot of parent involvement..

She left them with their father and their grandparents. It's not babysitting if they're your kids!

 

[ThinkHard]

Guest identity always beats national identity in Turkey. If you are a Tourist, your nationality is of little importance.

I was just making a light hearted joke more at the stereotype that French aren't fans of Americans.

 

[SophieRose]

There are some pictures on there from DC and I think maybe one of the Golden Gate Bridge? I think she had travelled regionally if not around the US a little.

There were no pictures of the Golden Gate Bridge on her account. And if there were, I would expect lots of pictures of SF.

 

[ThinkHard]

:what:

We do know she had some limit to her funds... but if it was that tight, I don't know if she would have been able to afford Amsterdam. Why spend all your money going to one place for 3 days, and leave nothing to spend in the place you'd planned to spend the majority of your time?

I haven't looked up tickets but I'd be willing to bet you can fly from Istanbul to Amsterdam for around 100 bucks one way.

 

[necco]

There were no pictures of the Golden Gate Bridge on her account. And if there were, I would expect lots of pictures of SF.

I think what people mistook for the Golden Gate is actually the Verrazano Narrows bridge. They are relatively similar looking from some angles. Both are suspension bridges. Both have 2 towers.

 

[ThinkHard]

I just messaged someone the EXACT same thought. I'd be a double agent for the KGB, an anarchist, a smuggler, a prostitute and possibly having a torrid affair with a yeti! :floorlaugh:

I agree, I'm sure mine would be quite insane too.

I'm sure if I died on my trip to Israel, where I visited for two days while living in Turkey, traveling alone, and staying in a hostel....there would have been some great conspiracy theories about that.

I'm the type of person who moved to a US small city, for an internship year for the simple reason I knew no one there, and nothing about it, and I just wanted to experience something new, see how other people live. See how much its the same or different.

And by the way I think I experienced more culture shock there then in any foreign country I've been!

 

[Yellow]

I guess there are two kinds of people in this world. Those who are normal and those who think normal is just a setting on the dryer. I clearly fall into the 2nd category.

I think you are using the term normal as a relative standard. The words normal and norm sometimes are used interchangeably. Saying something is not the norm is simply making a factual statement on what most people do. Normal behavior or doing what the norm is is not necessarily better than behavior different than the norm.

Most of the posters here (at least me and it seems like others) are simply making a factual observation that in their opinion her behavior is not what the majority of people do. It is not common for a woman of limited means with no travel experience to travel solo w 2 small children at hone. Maybe it should be, but as a factual matter it is not what usually happens,

I don't think anyone is saying that normal behavior is better or that doing the norm is appropriate for everyone. In fact being outside the norm is what makes life exciting.

Saying someone acts outside the norm is not the same thing as saying that all should abide by the norm.

 

[CMac2]

:what:

I haven't looked up tickets but I'd be willing to bet you can fly from Istanbul to Amsterdam for around 100 bucks one way.

I wouldn't expect the airfare to be astronomical. I was speaking to the post that wondered if SS was isolated in Turkey, unable to take in the sights, because she lacked the funds for public transportation. I wouldn't expect she would spend money on plane tickets to spend 3 days in Amsterdam while saving no money for transportation in Turkey- where she'd planned to spend 3 weeks.

 

[ThinkHard]

I think you are using the term normal as a relative standard. The words normal and norm sometimes are used interchangeably. Saying something is not the norm is simply making a factual statement on what most people do. Normal behavior or doing what the norm is is not necessarily better than behavior different than the norm.

Most of the posters here (at least me and it seems like others) are simply making a factual observation that in their opinion her behavior is not what the majority of people do. It is not common for a woman of limited means with no travel experience to travel solo w 2 small children at hone. Maybe it should be, but as a factual matter it is not what usually happens,

I don't think anyone is saying that normal behavior is better or that doing the norm is appropriate for everyone. In fact being outside the norm is what makes life exciting.

Saying someone acts outside the norm is not the same thing as saying that all should abide by the norm.

I'm sorry but I still just don't think 9 and 11 are small children. Adults far to often tend to underestimate kids. Yes I agree I would not leave them alone either. But at 9 and 11 they don't need constant super vision in the house. By 9 and 11 kids can do a lot of things for themselves. I have loads of experience with 3-6 year olds, and most people even underestimate them and their capabilities and level of understanding. 9 and 11 is far older then that.

Also I don't see people accusing fathers of abandoning their children on a business trip when they are left with their mother! Why is sarai being accused of not thinking of her children by leaving them with their OWN father?

 

[necco]

I think you are using the term normal as a relative standard. The words normal and norm sometimes are used interchangeably. Saying something is not the norm is simply making a factual statement on what most people do. Normal behavior or doing what the norm is is not necessarily better than behavior different than the norm.

Most of the posters here (at least me and it seems like others) are simply making a factual observation that in their opinion her behavior is not what the majority of people do. It is not common for a woman of limited means with no travel experience to travel solo w 2 small children at hone. Maybe it should be, but as a factual matter it is not what usually happens,

I don't think anyone is saying that normal behavior is better or that doing the norm is appropriate for everyone. In fact being outside the norm is what makes life exciting.

Saying someone acts outside the norm is not the same thing as saying that all should abide by the norm.

Yellow, I could have said that I exist at least two standard deviations from the norm, but the statistical analysis isn't quite as pithy as the dryer comment. If you prefer, I can say I do the limbo under the bell curve at the point where y approaches zero.

 

[necco]

i'm sorry but i still just don't think 9 and 11 are small children. Adults far to often tend to underestimate kids. Yes i agree i would not leave them alone either. But at 9 and 11 they don't need constant super vision in the house. By 9 and 11 kids can do a lot of things for themselves. I have loads of experience with 3-6 year olds, and most people even underestimate them and their capabilities and level of understanding. 9 and 11 is far older then that.

Also i don't see people accusing fathers of abandoning their children on a business trip when they are left with their mother! Why is sarai being accused of not thinking of her children by leaving them with their own father?

yes! They are his kids!!!!

 

[ThinkHard]

I wouldn't expect the airfare to be astronomical. I was speaking to the post that wondered if SS was isolated in Turkey, unable to take in the sights, because she lacked the funds for public transportation. I wouldn't expect she would spend money on plane tickets to spend 3 days in Amsterdam while saving no money for transportation in Turkey- where she'd planned to spend 3 weeks.

I agree. Plus your money goes pretty far in Turkey. Stuffs cheaper, some sights are free. Hagia Sofia is 20ytl that's about 12-16 bucks depending on the conversion rate at the time.

 

[KuriousKev]

Also I don't see people accusing fathers of abandoning their children on a business trip when they are left with their mother! Why is sarai being accused of not thinking of her children by leaving them with their OWN father?

:floorlaugh: Sorry but I had to chuckle at that comment.

 

[AuburnPoet]

She left them with their father and their grandparents. It's not babysitting if they're your kids!

I am sorry NECCO But I so had to comment on this. My mother had such a time with parents saying this. My brother would say he was babysitting his kids (his own kids mind you) and my mother would be livid and give him a lecture on how it isn't BABYSITTING if they are your OWN children.

But some men forget that. Moms raise the kids and men just babysit every now and then.

My mother hated that.....

Sorry to go OT but I just had to comment...you made me smile and think of my mom.

 

[Elley Mae]

I think you are using the term normal as a relative standard. The words normal and norm sometimes are used interchangeably. Saying something is not the norm is simply making a factual statement on what most people do. Normal behavior or doing what the norm is is not necessarily better than behavior different than the norm.

Most of the posters here (at least me and it seems like others) are simply making a factual observation that in their opinion her behavior is not what the majority of people do. It is not common for a woman of limited means with no travel experience to travel solo w 2 small children at hone. Maybe it should be, but as a factual matter it is not what usually happens,

I don't think anyone is saying that normal behavior is better or that doing the norm is appropriate for everyone. In fact being outside the norm is what makes life exciting.

Saying someone acts outside the norm is not the same thing as saying that all should abide by the norm.

Exactly!

 

[CMac2]

Also I don't see people accusing fathers of abandoning their children on a business trip when they are left with their mother! Why is sarai being accused of not thinking of her children by leaving them with their OWN father?

BBM

Who accused Sarai of not thinking of her children when she left them with her father? Unless I misunderstood the entire tone of the conversation, all that's been said by anyone here is that her decision to travel to Turkey alone with two small children at home is not a common thing to do. That's it- just looking at personal experience- it's not the most common thing for a mother of two to do.

Doesn't make it wrong, doesn't mean she wasn't thinking of her children. None of those things.

What is with people getting so defensive when someone has a different world view than they do? At the end of the day, all we have are theories. None of us know what happened, none of us know Sarai, or what she was thinking when she did any of the things she did. That's why sleuthing this case gets so exhausting.

I've been out of the country- alone- since my kids were born (and they were younger than Sarai's are). I left my husband in charge of them. Be that as it may, I can acknowledge that like Sarai, what I did, was not a common thing to do. There wasn't anything wrong with it- but not a ton of people do it.

If you dare have an opinion that isn't the most popular theory of the moment, prepare to be attacked.

 

[KivaSupporter]

http://www.dailymail.co.uk/news/article-2275205/Mommy-got-hurt-died-Husband-New-York-mother-murdered-Turkey-reveals-moment-finally-told-sons-aged-9-11-death.html#axzz2KFfh3ssl

The devastated husband of the New York mother who was murdered while on a solo trip to Turkey has revealed that he today told their sons, aged 9 and 11 that 'mommy got hurt and she died'.