this is my first post to websleuths, although i've read & thanked fairly often over the last couple of years.
i do apologize for not writing too terribly well. i've been working it over for HOURS, trying to couch what i say with the least amount of sorrow and potential embarrassment for its subject. i feel bad for LEKR, i think she wound up in a dreadful situation in los angeles, lost her way, took an odd & circuitous & not precisely legal way back, then lost herself again, wrecked on the rocks of suspicious, unsympathetic in-laws. it was not a match, at the very least, and i feel more kindly disposed towards the lost lamb than the hardy family.
at long last & at any rate, here's what i have to say. again, i'm rushing, so please forgive my grammar [when more awake, i ofttimes work as a tech writer. i can write this perfectly or i can write it fast—& fast is the rock to which i'm today tethered. i'm tired. it's nearly 4am.....]
& i am in los angeles. & i was once involved in the wonderful world that belongs to that rarest of l.a. breeds, the model/actress. & i think LEKR was another card carrying member thereof, & it is this good guess that drives my theory. anyway.
anyway.
• cuban food. well-known, well-liked, oft-trendy cuban restaurant named Versailles, i know not why, on venice boulevard. los angeles institution. will accommodate vegetarians well, can eat beans-rice-plantains-creamy thing while one's ghastly second husband slurps tentacles & gets beer-drunk. done it many times. good food. bet she liked it. glad he's gone.
• for some reason i long believed LEKR was from bakersfield, or at least central calif. i now know that's more an assumption than a definite; still, at 5'10" & looking something like [then iconic] demi moore, it's an easy slide into los angeles' promised golden world. i would bet she arrived with model dreams, got work—spectacular height means a lot—didn't get as much work, nor as high up as she'd wanted.
slid, possibly, into hand modeling [decent pay, no prestige], then into the world of Be Nice to Rich Men. this is not as bad as it sounds, or it doesn't have to be. it's rep'd work, for heavens sake, you get it from your agent, believe it or not, and it can send you around the world—sex largely optional. instead, what it is, is pretty much sitting or standing around as decor, making important people look rich. one of our presidential candidates likely met at least a couple of his wives in a similar fashion—a whole bunch of tall, very thin women drinking cocktails, "eating dinner" among the wealthy in a fancy, fancy room. yes, you get paid for it. again though, unless you're husband-hunting: no prestige. no advancement. no nothing.
• besides that, other problems do arise. gain weight and you're lucky to find a place at the buffet, nevermind a good seat. work at a low level for too long and you're considered someone who just does that—a catalog model—& better jobs dry up. don't do what's asked—whatever it is—and you're gone. in the thick of this, word used advisedly, there are a whole mess of avenues you can take. none of them are good.
• 402 months is a prison sentence. there are no two ways about it. nothing else gets counted in months like that, certainly not thirty-plus years worth of them. i do not believe it's a sentence belonging to LEKR. i do think she knows the person sentenced, i believe she knows the reason behind the sentencing, & i believe she knows more about the crime that created the reason. i do not think she liked any of it. i think she wanted to get away, get away fast, & get away clean. i think that's why she looks so happy in her idaho photo. i wish the dream she had in idaho truly came to pass—& stayed there.
• it makes no sense to have legal problems in north hollywood & an attorney in inglewood. inglewood & north hollywood are about ninety minutes apart. to better situate this: north hollywood is in the northisheast san fernando valley. it's about 10 - 15 minutes away from downtown LA. it's maybe a half hour from beverly hills. between NoHo and inglewood are hundreds, if not thousands, of lawyers. you'd have to have a remarkable reason to bypass them.
inglewood is also very déclassé. so she's driving, in bad traffic, well over an hour to get advice from someone soon to be disbarred, whose office is in a deep dark dump. i dont think that makes sense under any circumstance other than one, and that one means something very hinky is going on, something which includes the lawyer, himself. something so hinky, in fact, that our disbarred doofus is unwilling to remember their interactions even though she's died.
• & now, of course, he has also died. i don't think these things are connected. what i think is connected is how, & why, & how untoward the little circumstances were in which they met.
• eg: the valley, in which one finds north hollywood [it's got nothing to do with picture show hollywood], is good for two things: drugs and *advertiser censored*. those 402 months likely involved the former, but models on the slide are too often involved in both. i hate saying this because i feel so bad for LEKR. would anyone want to know who she was if this is why she became who she did? would it not be preferable to leave it alone? is it possible the social security guy has finally figured what he missed and just will not tell?
still, if you want to find her "real name" or "real identity"—after all her hell, i think LEKR is her real identity—you'd do well to check old, aboveboard, model agents; model reps who'd put anyone anywhere for a price; anyone from l.a. who was sentenced to 402 months during the mid-late 80s, along with anyone who was involved in, yes, old *advertiser censored*. if it's of any consolation, old *advertiser censored* is fairly straightforward, nowhere near as skizzy as today's stuff. i doubt she did it for long, it went too much against her nature. if she did it at all, i do not think she liked it.
from that unworthy branch, & as far as people possibly missed, you might also check with someone like dennis hof, who's been in the business forever & whom i believe recently married heidi fleiss; together they run the bunny ranch. i think. had LEKR run amok & then aground in this not so uncommon way, she could easily have touched down, briefly, in nevada. nevada's on the circuit. she had a p.o.b in nevada.
• i think she was tremendously happy to get away. in the idaho picture she looks as if she's beaming her way into a brand new life. i wish it had really taken. so help me, when you're married seven years & have a toddler daughter, that IS your family. when the detective said that BR had to decide between her & his family & he chose his family—i mean, what crueler thing could have been said? what crueler could have been done? what is possibly more negating than that?
• as for texas, i'd get ahold of the guy who knew her as a stripper. people don't just fall into that job as soon as they hit a new town, especially when they have church socials in mind. that's her transition period, she knew how to transition in just that way [who, other than she, said her implants were done in 1991?] & that guy knows more than most. YES, i believe him. i've seen this trajectory more than once. it's common. the only uncommon piece of the puzzle is her lost original identity. she was clever, & she did a good job with that. how much better it would have been had she been able to live, & leave it alone.
• lastly, there was an ENORMOUS crime in l.a. during the time she lived & worked in the city. the "402 months" brought it to mind: the wonderland murders. drug murder put paid for by a gangster who owned a nightclub called the starwood. involved every skizz bit of our grand metropolis: drugs [coke, of course], lots of beatings & lots of blood, plus the involvement of john c holmes, johnny wadd, *advertiser censored* star extraordinaire, 14 inches & a 14-year-old girlfriend. eddie nash, the starwood's owner/dealer/gangster, used to keep models around. college girl types. lots & lots at a time. just to be there. &, of course, there was LOTS of dope. enough to keep anybody skinny—& LEKR does not stay thin easily, obviously. most people don't. if she wanted dope, & nearly everyone did, the thinning of the thighs would be why. i'm not judging; i've done it, & for the same reason. i dont run to thin either. & she's already admitted bulimia.
at any rate, eddie nash's was a houseful of dope & collegiate-looking models. the wonderland trial ran on for nearly a decade. i'm not saying she was involved or overheard or even was there. her 402 month mess could be something else entirely. but the people involved in the wonderland mess would near-absolutely know the people involved in her mess, & all of them would near-absolutely either know her or know someone who knows her. i'm one scene adjacent so i was not there [& i look like i belong in a russ meyer movie, not like a wholesome coed] but i can easily put a gangster, a model, a hinky attorney, & some sort of major crime in a room. it is, as they say, a no brainer. hinky attorney could have helped with the ID, too.
so those are my weary earliest morning thoughts. not well-put, i do apologize. please know i would never have gotten them here at all if i stopped to mess with capital letters & grammar. tomorrow i might be able to edit, or give you something more, but it's after 5am & tonite i am beat. & i'm a long long time from rooms like that. i didnt get as deep, so i didnt have to run as far. i wish her run ended more happily. i am sad, again, for LEKR.
ps. there is an excellent explication of her likely connections to the straight model world written in a post in the ben perkins, jr thread. i cannot remember the name of the poster—i do remember that she'd noted she also had an 'unusual' life—but i did want to credit her. she knows what she's talking about & i concur.