Last night I spent about 20mins trying to write my thoughts down after the charges were made public. I gave up because I couldn't articulate my viewpoint clearly enough that I felt people would understand. I think your post did it very well.
One great thing about Websleuths is we're all wanting to use an evidence-based approach to forming our viewpoint about a case. We all look at the same/similar credible information.... yet end up with very different theories. I love that we're able to debate and brainstorm because it really can challenge your theories and help form better ones. We're not always going to agree though!
Don't feel that you have to explore your own values! Whilst some people may not agree or see your point of view, others of us do see what you're saying. When more information comes out, we'll adjust our theories and views accordingly
Thank you for your post gia2.
Whilst I don't feel I have to explore my own values, I am glad to have done so, it has helped me to firm up my opinions and attitudes.
It led me to this article here
http://www.mirror.co.uk/news/uk-news/what-age-consent-around-world-2802173 where it is stated -
"In Europe, countries who have the age of consent set at 16 include Cyprus, Finland, Georgia, Latvia, Lithuania, Luxembourg, the Netherlands, Norway, and Switzerland.
For Austria, Germany, Portugal and Italy it is 14, and in France, the Czech Republic, Denmark, and Greece it is 15.
Spain did have one of the lowest ages of consent on the continent at just 13, but recently agreed to raise this to 16.
Throughout the rest of the world, there are big variations.
In Bahrain, it is set at 21 for women who want to marry without their father's consent, while in nearby Saudi Arabia, all sex outside of marriage is illegal but there are no laws limiting the age at which you can get married.
In China, the age of consent is 14, in Iraq it is 18, while in Japan it is five years lower at 13.
The likes of Brazil, Peru, Paraguay, Ecuador and Colombia all have it set at 14."
For me, the thing is, were I and my family to move to Italy say, where the age of consent is 14, would I have a different opinion about when it is appropriate for my children to have sexual relations? Should I think that just because UK law says 16 is when all minors are old enough to consent to sex, that the UK has it right and also that all minors are equals? Is the law appropriate if minors are breaking it, and should I rely on other people to decide when it is appropriate and not decide that for myself? Kayleigh was in her 16th year, not quite 16 but how much would she have changed in a few months from being too young to being old enough?
And then we come to the age difference of 12 years. Something attracted her, she chose to meet him, she could have gone with her friend. We are seeing it from how it looks from his point of view to be meeting a girl younger than him, but what about her point of view? Should we also have a law against age differences? Would their illicit meeting have been more acceptable if he were 17? If so, why? Plenty of people are more mature than their ages and plenty are immature. Does LH being immature make him a dangerous predator? Personally I don't think so, without having more facts, but the charge of grooming would insinuate that he is a predator, that he had a devious intent. How about he was just younger than his years and hadn't yet grown out of student-type fancy dress parties and larking around? How about he thought she was a pretty girl, mentioned her to his family and he fancied asking her out? Would the family have pressed charges against him if Kayleigh had come home safely?
Finally I come to facebook. If LH had worked in a chip shop and seen Kayleigh coming in with a friend and had thought she looked nice, perhaps 16 or 17 with her make up on, would it be any different to him finding her fb page and liking her photo? I've mentioned my own teenage experiences, which happened prior to the age of the internet and the smart phone. In fact, when I was in my last year at primary school (gasp) aged 10, my class had a couple of American boys, two brothers, whose father was in the military and as a family they were temporarily staying at a military base in England. We had an outing to their house one day, because their mother wanted to teach us how to cook an American meal. Burgers, Apple Pie etc. It was a great fun day and I remember it like it was yesterday, although I am 51 now. After lunch we were left to our own devices somewhat, and I don't know how it happened but I remember ending up in the bathroom with a group of girls, the boys all standing outside the door. They bribed or begged us (can't remember what was said) to show our private parts to them while they looked through the keyhole! We were 10 and 11 years old! It happens, it is nature, I don't think any of us were abnormal. We had no facebook or snapchat or other technology. I suppose what I'm saying is all we can do as parents, is guide our kids and keep interested in what is going on in their lives and notice if there are any worrying changes. We were taught not to accept lifts from strangers, and that is as true today as it was back then. The equivalent today is the strangers who lurk behind internet contact, people we don't know.
Gosh I'm rambling so much, but I come back to thinking that unless more charges are brought against LH, and until the full facts come out at trial, I'm going to keep an open mind as to his motives towards Kayleigh.
Was LH long-term unemployed, or just between jobs? He's in his late 20s, not a school leaver. Perhaps he had savings, or inherited some money from a grandparent, or won a few grand with a Premium Bond. Maybe his parents bought the house. Lots of possibilities.
