UT UT - Macin Smith, 17, St George, 1 Sept 2015

[cybervampira]

Video at link.

Divorce, despair and a family's need to 'move on' leads to final search for Macin Smith | Gephardt Daily

In an exclusive interview with Gephardt Daily, Macin’s mother, Tracey Bratt-Smith and her brother, Keith Bratt, Macin’s uncle, reveal just how heavy the burden has been for Macin’s loved ones — including a decision by Tracey and husband Darrin to end their marriage of more than 30 years.

They also discuss — in new detail — the contents of a letter found after Macin’s disappearance and why it’s led them to one inescapable conclusion — that its time for those who love Macin most to once again live their lives.

 

[Alethea]

Video at link.

Divorce, despair and a family's need to 'move on' leads to final search for Macin Smith | Gephardt Daily

Oh this is so sad, I feel so bad for Macin's mom. In this interview she says Macin's note included things that both she and his dad didn't do, and said he has been suffering for over 5 years at that point. Keith said he finally read the letter this weekend and said he never understood the depth of Macin's pain until he read the letter.

 

[kelsie]

At age 17, I experienced some very profound suicidal urges as well. I am 23 now and doing a lot better, and (MOO) I think Macin didn't see a way through and it breaks my heart. Things do really get better with time and proper care.

 

[Alethea]

At age 17, I experienced some very profound suicidal urges as well. I am 23 now and doing a lot better, and (MOO) I think Macin didn't see a way through and it breaks my heart. Things do really get better with time and proper care.

I'm glad you are feeling better. I really liked the "it gets better" campaign a few years ago because I think that's the exact message young people need. School can be awful, teenagers are awful, it can feel like you will always be picked on or put down but it really does get better. You can choose your own life and live on your terms. It is so, so, so hard to see that at 14, 16, 18 - particularly if you aren't getting the help you need, or you haven't found the right help yet. I wish Macin knew how many people "know" him now and accept him and love him.

 

[AnotherNancyDrew]

Very sorry to hear the final group search yielded no new info. Even sorrier to hear that Tracey and Darrin are divorcing. I can't imagine the stress they have been under since the move to Utah. I'm glad Tracey has such a kind and compassionate brother who would literally walk a mile to try and figure out where Macin would have gone the day he disappeared.

 

[xxbreak]

Very sorry to hear the final group search yielded no new info. Even sorrier to hear that Tracey and Darrin are divorcing. I can't imagine the stress they have been under since the move to Utah. I'm glad Tracey has such a kind and compassionate brother who would literally walk a mile to try and figure out where Macin would have gone the day he disappeared.

Keith is absolutely one of the greats! AMAZING human. We did indeed go through Macins room up and down, walk every direction for miles on multiple days

 

[xxbreak]

How many here actually believe that Macin is out in the desert?

I tend to stay behind the scenes, objective as possible and entertain every theory and “lead” that we get, but Keith really explains it well in the video. The evidence combined with Macins indoor and introverted personality certainly stack towards this. It’s VERY hard to explain the terrain and depth of this area of St. G without actually seeing it yourself. That said, I would absolutely love for him to be out living and happy somewhere

 

[JerseyGirl]

Utah teen Macin Smith was last seen on September 1, 2015, leaving his St. George, Utah home for what his parents believed was another day of high school. The 17-year-old never showed up to Desert High School. All of his personal belongings, including his cellphone and wallet, were found at home. In the three years since, family members have desperately searched for the teen. Hundreds continue to post almost daily on the 'Help Find Macin Smith' Facebook page, and the family is offering a $10,000 reward for information leading to Macin’s return. There have been multiple reports of possible sightings of Macin, but none has proved credible. Police tell Dateline they still follow up on any leads they receive and Macin’s case is an active missing persons investigation.

Five years of Dateline’s Missing in America: 109 still missing

 

[mickey2942]

It would have been fairly easy for Macin to hitch a ride on I-15 to Las Vegas, San Diego, even to Mesquite and go from there. Street kids end up doing some odd things, even when there is family to go back home to.

I am not sure I hope he did that, but some have. I doubt he is out in the desert on his own this long.

 

[Beagle]

It would have been fairly easy for Macin to hitch a ride on I-15 to Las Vegas, San Diego, even to Mesquite and go from there. Street kids end up doing some odd things, even when there is family to go back home to.

I am not sure I hope he did that, but some have. I doubt he is out in the desert on his own this long.

what always troubles me is that as far as i am aware no one who may have given these kids a lift have ever come forward and said where they were dropped off ... if i had picked (which i don't do) i would certainly report it once i knew they were a missing person, i would do the same if i had seen them trying to hitchhike.

 

[mickey2942]

what always troubles me is that as far as i am aware no one who may have given these kids a lift have ever come forward and said where they were dropped off ... if i had picked (which i don't do) i would certainly report it once i knew they were a missing person, i would do the same if i had seen them trying to hitchhike.

Unless they don't know. Some people really don't pay attention to lost children flyers/news.

 

[Ejay]

I have followed this for some time and just never posted. And I am 18 years old so this is from the point of an 18 year old. And first I want to say I think Macin is alive and well. And second, I do not believe the parents had anything to do (directly) with the day of his disappearance. And third, it really doesn’t matter WHY he ran away-he’s gone. That said, I have been comparing things said by people involved and the data has not been consistent in what was said over time -some of the elements simply do not add up. Of course, any and all of this is speculation anyway because the parents have not provided all of the facts. And I mean no disrespect to the parents, but I do not think they are telling the full truth on the situation leading up to him leaving and in reality things were much different or even more intense.

First off, no one in the public knows all the facts. Few people would likely tell all the negative stuff about their family dynamic to strangers anyway. I imagine most parents would try to put a somewhat positive spin on the family life with things like, “We never fought”, “ or “Dad and son never argued” and such. This is natural because every parent “wants” to think and have others believe they were good parents and doing the best they could with their children upbringing. Problem here I think, Is that the parents (mother) never really heard or acted on what her son was telling her all along and dad simply did not want to hear or lacked compassion. The mother (who is some sort of a clinical or therapy worker), stated Macin was special and has been depressed for a very long time, yet she never talked about any help or ongoing professional help offered to her son. Maybe there was, just not mentioned much or at all. It’s sort of like they buried their heads in the sand, as Macin became more and more isolated and internalizing his thoughts (and plans).

Mom seemed more patient or lenient with her special son. Dad, who strikes me as a “my way or the highway type person, was away more than he was around apparently, and when he came back to live in the household (like three or so days before), had it in his mind that he was going to make “a man out of his son”. I could image things like, "Stop wasting time playing games"; "Get a job"; "Get out and meet people so you don’t look so weird" (to us and the church), and, “You will learn to drive NOW whether you want to or not because I say so". And Heaven forbid, if they knew by “chance” Macin was gay. (There are supposed centers affiliated with their church that claim they can “fix” gay or *advertiser censored* addicted people; send your kid to us and when we’re done with him, he’ll be good as new.” And I have heard stories because I have relatives that belong to the same church organization-as well as live in SLC). If there is any truth to what I said above, wow, I would bolt too I think.

I suspect all things with the dad were mandates rather than discussions when it came to Macin. So if that were the case or something similar, all of that was way out of Macin’s comfort zone. I doubt that the day of his vanishing was the “first time” Macin ever locked his door. That just makes no sense, especially with a strong-minded dad that obviously demanded total control. And in my opinion, going into Macin’s room (or breaking down the door lock) that night, and taking away the only connection Macin really had with the “world” would be nothing short of cruel considering the situation of Macin. I am not trying to project that they were bad parents, nothing of the sort. I think they were very dysfunctional parents and truly they thought they had good intent and maybe even did try their “best”. Macin no doubt, likely felt differently.

It’s impossible to know what happened the 24 hours prior to his vanishing and the only person that truly knows what really happened is Macin. But after studying this case, I have my own theory and again, it’s just a speculated guess that is certainly no worse than the dozens of others I have read. One thing that really stands out to me is the note that they “found” a week after he left. They said they searched the wallet early on and found the money and ids and such. And then suddenly a week later, they did another search and eureka- epiphany, there was the note hidden deep in the depths of the wallet. Sorry, but that does make any rational sense at all. What parent in a panic of a missing son or daughter would not have tore that thing apart the first time, looking for clues. And no 17-year old I know has a wallet that is so crammed with stuff, that a two or three page not would be missed when the wallet was examined. That story just does not add up. Of course holding back on the letter only adds to the mystery and I hope someday it does get released to the public but I will not hold my breath as I believe elements in it would probably be embarrassing to and not edify the parents.

Macin’s computer was taken away for some unknown prior amount of time and he just got it back that day. I believe Macin had access to anyway to the internet from other sources-library or what not prior to getting it back. So he must have been excited to come home and start using his computer that day before he left. Except, dad had other plans; driving lessons when Macin got home. Macin (perhaps) faked a headache to get out of it, which then went in his bedroom and did his computer thing, after all it was his first day getting it back. Mom came to visit him later in the evening and said good night. Macin wiped his computer history somewhere around midnight. Dad heard a noise (probably Macin preparing for his bolt). Dad then entered Macin’s room, (I still feel the door was locked and dad broke in), and took the computer and phone. Although dad “claims” there was no argument, I cannot believe that, because he was even quoted to say to wife afterwards. “See I told you”. Now anytime my dad says something to my mom like that about me, is never because dad was just making conversation, but rather as a form of disgust or anger.

Macin was a planner. I believe he planned to leave the next day and the computer episode was just a coincidence. He had been planning this out, maybe for months or even for as long as he knew dad was moving back after not living there since they moved there five months prior. They report Macin had no money or supplies. There is absolutely no one could know that. He could have been salting away a little money here and there, and article of clothing or twenty over time at some off site for when the day came. By all indications, he was a very intelligent person, and during his times of isolation from society so to speak, could have created a real master plan for escape, and developed many internet friendships over the years. Who would really know otherwise? So this was arranged by Macin and he had assistance from the outside for the execution of the plan.

I think when he awoke for school that morning, he never left the house but hid, only making it look like he left. I think he was going to bolt after parents left the house for work or what not. I believe he did not count on the dad staying home to do landscaping that day (which I feel was dad’s way of making sure he was there when Macin came home from school for that “mandatory” diving lesson that was postponed the day before. I think during that time between 7:40 a.m. and around 3 p.m., Macin was waiting for his opportunity to sneak away, all the while hiding things to throw people off the track and delay them. He left the note because this perhaps the first time he could express he inner feelings or at least one final time without being shut down. He got his opportunity to finally leave around 3pm, and he left, which could account for the neighbor seeing him walking away. This time, Macin had no intention of ever returning and made extra effort to ensure no one would to be able to find him, by hiding wallet and school books and all. Then he left and closed the previous seventeen year chapter of his life.

I cannot begin to understand the pain parents must go though when a loved one goes missing. But I think Macin is doing just fine with his new life. In his mind, the past was too painful (for whatever reasons) for him to look back as he began work on the new chapter of his life. I only hope that Macin eventually finds a way to communicate just two words to his parents: “I’m OK”, which should then provide a sort of closure for the family.

 

[mickey2942]

I have followed this for some time and just never posted. And I am 18 years old so this is from the point of an 18 year old. And first I want to say I think Macin is alive and well. And second, I do not believe the parents had anything to do (directly) with the day of his disappearance. And third, it really doesn’t matter WHY he ran away-he’s gone. That said, I have been comparing things said by people involved and the data has not been consistent in what was said over time -some of the elements simply do not add up. Of course, any and all of this is speculation anyway because the parents have not provided all of the facts. And I mean no disrespect to the parents, but I do not think they are telling the full truth on the situation leading up to him leaving and in reality things were much different or even more intense.

First off, no one in the public knows all the facts. Few people would likely tell all the negative stuff about their family dynamic to strangers anyway. I imagine most parents would try to put a somewhat positive spin on the family life with things like, “We never fought”, “ or “Dad and son never argued” and such. This is natural because every parent “wants” to think and have others believe they were good parents and doing the best they could with their children upbringing. Problem here I think, Is that the parents (mother) never really heard or acted on what her son was telling her all along and dad simply did not want to hear or lacked compassion. The mother (who is some sort of a clinical or therapy worker), stated Macin was special and has been depressed for a very long time, yet she never talked about any help or ongoing professional help offered to her son. Maybe there was, just not mentioned much or at all. It’s sort of like they buried their heads in the sand, as Macin became more and more isolated and internalizing his thoughts (and plans).

Mom seemed more patient or lenient with her special son. Dad, who strikes me as a “my way or the highway type person, was away more than he was around apparently, and when he came back to live in the household (like three or so days before), had it in his mind that he was going to make “a man out of his son”. I could image things like, "Stop wasting time playing games"; "Get a job"; "Get out and meet people so you don’t look so weird" (to us and the church), and, “You will learn to drive NOW whether you want to or not because I say so". And Heaven forbid, if they knew by “chance” Macin was gay. (There are supposed centers affiliated with their church that claim they can “fix” gay or *advertiser censored* addicted people; send your kid to us and when we’re done with him, he’ll be good as new.” And I have heard stories because I have relatives that belong to the same church organization-as well as live in SLC). If there is any truth to what I said above, wow, I would bolt too I think.

I suspect all things with the dad were mandates rather than discussions when it came to Macin. So if that were the case or something similar, all of that was way out of Macin’s comfort zone. I doubt that the day of his vanishing was the “first time” Macin ever locked his door. That just makes no sense, especially with a strong-minded dad that obviously demanded total control. And in my opinion, going into Macin’s room (or breaking down the door lock) that night, and taking away the only connection Macin really had with the “world” would be nothing short of cruel considering the situation of Macin. I am not trying to project that they were bad parents, nothing of the sort. I think they were very dysfunctional parents and truly they thought they had good intent and maybe even did try their “best”. Macin no doubt, likely felt differently.

It’s impossible to know what happened the 24 hours prior to his vanishing and the only person that truly knows what really happened is Macin. But after studying this case, I have my own theory and again, it’s just a speculated guess that is certainly no worse than the dozens of others I have read. One thing that really stands out to me is the note that they “found” a week after he left. They said they searched the wallet early on and found the money and ids and such. And then suddenly a week later, they did another search and eureka- epiphany, there was the note hidden deep in the depths of the wallet. Sorry, but that does make any rational sense at all. What parent in a panic of a missing son or daughter would not have tore that thing apart the first time, looking for clues. And no 17-year old I know has a wallet that is so crammed with stuff, that a two or three page not would be missed when the wallet was examined. That story just does not add up. Of course holding back on the letter only adds to the mystery and I hope someday it does get released to the public but I will not hold my breath as I believe elements in it would probably be embarrassing to and not edify the parents.

Macin’s computer was taken away for some unknown prior amount of time and he just got it back that day. I believe Macin had access to anyway to the internet from other sources-library or what not prior to getting it back. So he must have been excited to come home and start using his computer that day before he left. Except, dad had other plans; driving lessons when Macin got home. Macin (perhaps) faked a headache to get out of it, which then went in his bedroom and did his computer thing, after all it was his first day getting it back. Mom came to visit him later in the evening and said good night. Macin wiped his computer history somewhere around midnight. Dad heard a noise (probably Macin preparing for his bolt). Dad then entered Macin’s room, (I still feel the door was locked and dad broke in), and took the computer and phone. Although dad “claims” there was no argument, I cannot believe that, because he was even quoted to say to wife afterwards. “See I told you”. Now anytime my dad says something to my mom like that about me, is never because dad was just making conversation, but rather as a form of disgust or anger.

Macin was a planner. I believe he planned to leave the next day and the computer episode was just a coincidence. He had been planning this out, maybe for months or even for as long as he knew dad was moving back after not living there since they moved there five months prior. They report Macin had no money or supplies. There is absolutely no one could know that. He could have been salting away a little money here and there, and article of clothing or twenty over time at some off site for when the day came. By all indications, he was a very intelligent person, and during his times of isolation from society so to speak, could have created a real master plan for escape, and developed many internet friendships over the years. Who would really know otherwise? So this was arranged by Macin and he had assistance from the outside for the execution of the plan.

I think when he awoke for school that morning, he never left the house but hid, only making it look like he left. I think he was going to bolt after parents left the house for work or what not. I believe he did not count on the dad staying home to do landscaping that day (which I feel was dad’s way of making sure he was there when Macin came home from school for that “mandatory” diving lesson that was postponed the day before. I think during that time between 7:40 a.m. and around 3 p.m., Macin was waiting for his opportunity to sneak away, all the while hiding things to throw people off the track and delay them. He left the note because this perhaps the first time he could express he inner feelings or at least one final time without being shut down. He got his opportunity to finally leave around 3pm, and he left, which could account for the neighbor seeing him walking away. This time, Macin had no intention of ever returning and made extra effort to ensure no one would to be able to find him, by hiding wallet and school books and all. Then he left and closed the previous seventeen year chapter of his life.

I cannot begin to understand the pain parents must go though when a loved one goes missing. But I think Macin is doing just fine with his new life. In his mind, the past was too painful (for whatever reasons) for him to look back as he began work on the new chapter of his life. I only hope that Macin eventually finds a way to communicate just two words to his parents: “I’m OK”, which should then provide a sort of closure for the family.

Welcome Ejay, thank you for the update, it sounds like you know Macin quite well.

I agree, that living in St. George has some unique pressures on teens, that other places don't have. My cousin felt pressured to go on an LDS mission, like he would have "failed and shamed" his family if he didn't go. He decided to take advantage of his full paid tuition scholarship to college for basketball instead. Literally, his Mom acted like there was a death in the family.

I am sorry Macin didn't feel "at home" with his family. I worry about him, all all of the teens in that area. I wish parents would see the cup as half full instead of half empty.

 

[Ejay]

Thanks Mickey2942. I want to be clear that in my opinion St. George or even the LDS are certainly not the only areas that puts unique pressures on people, especially teens. There are "Macins" across the country dealing with pressures put on by tradition, religion, local culture or what not. And everyone of us has a unique or 'different' handicap to boot. For some it's lagging speech, for others it is super low self-esteem, big ears, small nose or whatever. Trying to reign in my political posture of a person my age, I will just say it is society as a whole has failed, and not the Macins of the world. Religious dogma that is not up for discussion (experience talking here-come from a super religious family myself), pressure from needing more and wanting more material crap, and the total inability to LISTEN to what kids/teens are saying is what has failed. And I don't totally blame parents for this. Parents like mine for instance, themselves were groomed by the church from the time they were kids, and it is 'natural' and comfortable to them to rear their offspring in the ways they know-or the ways of the church, for instance (regardless of if those 'ways' are negative or positive. (After all that's how you get into Heaven right?)

I have a very close friend from the same "church flavor" upbringing as me. (Not LDS but just as, as, as bad; there I said it...) He is gay. He is living in total secret and has buried that because I know the family long enough and well enough that the dad would beat the living *advertiser censored* out of him if he knew about his son. My friend is in constant turmoil 24 hours a day. My friend has many times shared with me that he was planning to "Do a Macin" himself as soon as he could. Never mind that he is a super nice person, awesome at playing music and such, but trust me, none of that would matter to the dad; dad would be totally fixed on the gayness of his son and nothing else would matter. So here is my friend, 17 years old and living a total life of fear and lies for the most part of his life. Great way to start out adulthood ya think? And do not think for a minute, if he asked me to help him escape that I would not do everything in my power that I could to assist him.

Through my eyes, there is already something good that has come of this. Macin is somewhat of a hero I think. He "fixed" his situation on his own. And I only say that because his story has brought something that has been going on for years with teens front and center in the national spotlight. I have to believe that every parent that saw Macin's story stopped for a minute and reevaluated their methods of dealing with their "unruly teens". All teens, all people are basically good. But we have to stop and listen to them, because guess what-teens will tell you their feelings, you just have to be willing to hear in a nonjudgmental way.

 

[mickey2942]

So sad. I have listened to so many stories like this. In SLC there is a "Rainbow Club" for teens who need a place to live when their parents kick them out for being "different".

My cousin announced to our extended family that he was gay, he imagined a huge drama, where no one would talk to him. Hardly! This is the same guy who stole my Barbies at age 5! We all "knew", and it really didn't matter. And my family is very religious. We can't even wear red! Go Cougars! (I know that Ejay will get that joke).

 

[Ejay]

hahaha. lol. yepper.

 

[mickey2942]

I wonder if Macin went hiking or climbing in the area? He may have fallen...

 

[Ejay]

Nope I think. He wanted as far and fast away from there that he could.
And I believe he had a ride waiting for him, if he went through desert, it was only as far as to grab his stash and get to the prearranged meeting place.

And, I also think that's one reason why he hung around into the afternoon. I think his prearranged meeting time with his associate was sometime after 3 p.m. (after school). I totally believe he picked the escape day way in advance. I also think he finalized any loose-end details and coordinated his watch with his helper, between the time he got his computer back and the wiping of the hard drive at midnight, when it was all done.

In my opinion, there simply was no motivation for him to stick around any longer than absolutely necessary in his mind. When he walked out of the home at around 3 p.m., the plan was in motion, and no turning back.

Furthermore, I believe he looks totally different now-a "new" person. Outside of the facial blemish below his eye and the speech, I will bet no one would even know it was him if they walked past him. Macin will not be found unless he wants to be found. Sorry for getting long-winded. haha

Something else that was always curious to me was that Macin vanished exactly one year to the day from the posting of the "sorry video" from "Michelle." Probably just a weird coincidence...

 

[siliconrod]

About two years ago there were unconfirmed sightings of Macin in Modesto and Sacramento CA but I don't know if there was any type of follow-up on these sightings.

 

[Ejay]

I think there was follow-up and determined not to be him. I think people are looking for a blond-haired 20 year old. I would lay down money betting that he looks nothing like the photos plastered all over. I would bet he has dark hair, and a beard as well. I mean that if I went through all the effort to erase tracks to find me from the get go, totally changing my appearance would be a no-brainer.
I personally think they are looking for a person in the photos that does not exist anymore.