WA - Four killed in Pilchuk High School shooting, Marysville, 24 Oct 2014

[kimi_SFC]

The NY Times link possumheart posted is a must read :tyou:

ETA;


Tangled Portrait of a Student Emerges in Washington Shooting - NYTimes.com

http://mobile.nytimes.com/2014/10/2...oter-at-washington-school.html?referrer=&_r=0


What I've learned so far from this tragedy is that Jaylen was crying out that something was really wrong.

I read his entire twitter - and he only created it because his friends had one.

He wore his heart on his sleeve. I remember one tweet he lamented about them discussing his personal life on their twitters. However, I couldn't find those tweets.

Perhaps it was the fact that he mattered and then in one click he didn't.

JMO, but if he was becoming unstable and this love triangle existed, then real-world deletion might be a possibility.

Psychologically speaking, I hope they're looking into it.

So so very sad. The finality of it, because he was right. He can't take back what he did.

His last tweet keeps echoing in my head and in my heart, and I keep wishing someone had just listened to him. Our kids need us to listen, and we need to figure out a way to resolve conflict that doesn't end like this.

I am terrified for my kids - our kids. :scared:

:moo:


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[Trino]

The NY Times link possumheart posted is a must read :tyou:

What I've learned so far from this tragedy is that Jaylen was crying out that something was really wrong.

I read his entire twitter - and he only created it because his friends had one.

He wore his heart on his sleeve. I remember one tweet he lamented about them discussing his personal life on their twitters. However, I couldn't find those tweets.

Perhaps it was the fact that he mattered and then in one click he didn't.

JMO, but if he was becoming unstable and this love triangle existed, then real-world deletion might be a possibility.

Psychologically speaking, I hope they're looking into it.

So so very sad. The finality of it, because he was right. He can't take back what he did.

His last tweet keeps echoing in my head and in my heart, and I keep wishing someone had just listened to him. Our kids need us to listen, and we need to figure out a way to resolve conflict that doesn't end like this.

I am terrified for my kids - our kids. :scared:

:moo: Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

One problem is these were adolescent kids who are trying to find themselves by distancing from adults. While they may share with each other, kids don't really understand signs of mental illness, thinking perhaps what someone tweets or shares on social media may be in fun or just something to say.

 

[Trino]

The NY Times link possumheart posted is a must read :tyou:

What I've learned so far from this tragedy is that Jaylen was crying out that something was really wrong.

I read his entire twitter - and he only created it because his friends had one.

He wore his heart on his sleeve. I remember one tweet he lamented about them discussing his personal life on their twitters. However, I couldn't find those tweets.

Perhaps it was the fact that he mattered and then in one click he didn't.

JMO, but if he was becoming unstable and this love triangle existed, then real-world deletion might be a possibility.

Psychologically speaking, I hope they're looking into it.

So so very sad. The finality of it, because he was right. He can't take back what he did.

His last tweet keeps echoing in my head and in my heart, and I keep wishing someone had just listened to him. Our kids need us to listen, and we need to figure out a way to resolve conflict that doesn't end like this.

I am terrified for my kids - our kids. :scared:

:moo: Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

One problem is these are adolescent kids who are trying to find themselves by distancing from adults. While they may share with each other, kids don't really understand signs of mental illness, thinking perhaps what someone tweets or shares on social media may be in fun or just something to say.

 

[kimi_SFC]

At my older child's school, the after school program has a peer program. All of the staff are specially trained to deal with the youngsters (they recruit people with mental health backgrounds, and also require additional training for everyone who interacts with the kids. Their approach is entirely proactive because the kids they work with are "high risk" and they'd rather put out the fire before it becomes an inferno.

So why not use this approach with all students? I agree with you Trino. Some kids won't open up to adults. However, there are those adults who know how to build that bridge with any child. Trust is an amazing thing. Amazingly fragile, but it can be done - I've seen it happen. Can we make it happen at every campus? At this juncture, when the lives of millions of children hang in the balance? As the Editorial piece I posted upthread stated, kids think lockdown drills are the norm. We have to do something. There are many amazingly talented people who are ready and willing to enter our schools and put in the work right now, if that's what it takes to make it happen. They are graduating at my school. We discuss this case with great sadness and belief that a difference can and must be made.

You'd have to be technically savvy, willing to listen, and you'd have to be ready to take on the school systems who aren't up to speed on how fast are kids are growing up. Cyberbullying has changed the face of what kids experience on a daily basis on campuses across the US and around the world.

I believe it can be done. Something has to be done. More than enough lives have been lost. That's just how I see it.

:twocents:


Sent from my iPhone using Tapatalk

 

[zoey]

Your first thoughts when a kid pulls a gun is that it comes from a place of anger or hatred. I'm thinking humiliation might be behind this. High school is so different to grade school and it seems he had been steady with one girl, SG, for junior high until recently - who is at another school. Then, from what I can glean from Twitter, another girl at his school(RJ) starts flirting with J and it escalates to the point that she has a pregnancy scare. Local MSM says this was 'about a girl'. I find it hard to imagine that 14-15 year olds are equipped with the emotional maturity to cope with such adult concepts and dilemmas, let alone the failure of distance relationships. There was also mention that a girl he had a crush on wouldn't date him, and he was crushed - I suspect this is a third girl.
Also in the media it says they were just ready to roll out funding for mental heath support in that area, for schools I think.
I was a bit put off by some of his peers openness about discussing marijuana use on social media, until I realised it is legal in Washington State.

Marijauna illegal for his age group. Also very expensive

 

[oceanblueeyes]

When I look at JF I see a kid who had much more than others. He seem to obtain everything he wanted to do. Football team, homecoming prince, popular, and well liked. Family revered and well respected.

Then all of a sudden he finds himself in a situation of rejection. Something that he has probably never had to deal with before because it seems everything just came easy for JF.

When a teen this age has been brought up to practically have all of their 'yeses' obtained they often cannot deal with rejection when they finally have to face it.

I think that was the motive that sparked this. He wasn't able to deal with rejection because it was a new to him and the feeling of being rejected made him feel very angry/rageful wanting to lash out in the worst way possible

JMO

 

[wenwe4]

The size of this school is over 2500 students, approximately 625 students per graduating class. Jaylen was voted homecoming royalty by his peers, which I find pretty impressive. This shooting is so different from the other school shootings. He was so connected to multiple social arenas (football, wrestling, tribe, highschool friends, spiritual/religious, school, extended family members, etc). I think he wanted to be taken "seriously" by his peers.


How many bullets can this type of gun hold? I'm pretty sure there were six shots (6 students) but maybe more since one report had him either reloading or checking the gun because it may have misfired. Student witnesses said it was a small gun. I wonder who he chose to shoot first, a girl he was angry with or one of his cousins?

 

[ATasteOfHoney]

Your first thoughts when a kid pulls a gun is that it comes from a place of anger or hatred. I'm thinking humiliation might be behind this. High school is so different to grade school and it seems he had been steady with one girl, SG, for junior high until recently - who is at another school. Then, from what I can glean from Twitter, another girl at his school(RJ) starts flirting with J and it escalates to the point that she has a pregnancy scare. Local MSM says this was 'about a girl'. I find it hard to imagine that 14-15 year olds are equipped with the emotional maturity to cope with such adult concepts and dilemmas, let alone the failure of distance relationships. There was also mention that a girl he had a crush on wouldn't date him, and he was crushed - I suspect this is a third girl.
Also in the media it says they were just ready to roll out funding for mental heath support in that area, for schools I think.
I was a bit put off by some of his peers openness about discussing marijuana use on social media, until I realised it is legal in Washington State.

I agree with your thoughts about these youngsters not being emotionally able to deal with mature serious issues based on the tweets.
I also remember my first crush & the heartbreak that ensued for me afterwards. Luckily, I had a good support system (family/friends) who I could rely on to give some "balance" to what I perceived was the world coming to an end! Thankfully, my outlet to vent wasn't Twitter---and I think that by tweeting hatred, it gives life & significance to the tweets themselves. It's almost like a person has to make good on every thing they post, iykwim?

 

[wenwe4]

When I look at JF I see a kid who had much more than others. He seem to obtain everything he wanted to do. Football team, homecoming prince, popular, and well liked. Family revered and well respected.

Then all of a sudden he finds himself in a situation of rejection. Something that he has probably never had to deal with before because it seems everything just came easy for JF.

When a teen this age has been brought up to practically have all of their 'yeses' obtained they often cannot deal with rejection when they finally have to face it.

I think that was the motive that sparked this. He wasn't able to deal with rejection because it was a new to him and the feeling of being rejected made him feel very angry/rageful wanting to lash out in the worst way possible

JMO

I agree with this! I think he may have been the "golden boy" (for lack of a better term) in his class. I noticed that he looked older than his peer male friends - I think this plays a big role in adolesence and teen years. It is an awkward time as the girls often begin to mature a couple of years earlier than boys. I think many of the kids admire the boys who begin to take on more masculine traits at ages 13 - 16. Those sort of rights of passage in entering the adult world that are seen outwardly (ie: more muscle mass, facial/body hair, lower voice, etc) are often idealized in this age group.

I also heard reports that people believed Jaylen would have been one of the tribal leaders when he grew. This time is such a difficult one with emotional upswings, hormonal changes, wanting to be taken care of but also learning to individuate from their parents, etc.

I will be interested to see how the investigation plays out. What other things will come out about how Jaylen was feeling, what he was thinking, and what was his plan (impulsive or calculated?)

 

[Shelby1]

Are they having classes tomorrow?

 

[zoey]

Are they having classes tomorrow?

School is closed for the week

 

[Shelby1]

http://washington.providence.org/news/

Hospital is providing updates.
[h=3]Update - 9:00 a.m., Oct. 26[/h]Gia Soriano and Shaylee Chuckulnaskit remain in critical condition, and are receiving ongoing, continual monitoring and care. Both girls continue to be surrounded by family and loved ones, and Providence is doing everything possible to support the physical, emotional and spiritual needs of all who have been affected by this tragedy. Our request is that the media and the public respect the families’ privacy during such a difficult time.
There are no press briefings scheduled at this time. Please continue to monitor this website for updates.

 

[Frigga]

Beautiful little girls. Full of promise. Sad.







This is the age when mental illness starts to emerge in people. Looking at his social media I do not feel he is just like other teens. I have teens. They don't have social media like this. Neither do any of the teens whose social media I'm aware of. Yeah, there are things I don't approve of sometimes but this kid?

To me his understanding of sex and the way he expressed it - with no filters- was odd. Socially inappropriate. I also saw tons of rage and some suicidal ideation. Also, he seemed to be cycling quickly between anger and love- for the same girl I think.

I feel if adults were able to see some of the social media posts their kids have and take public expressions of rage, revenge, suicidal thoughts, pain- seriously, maybe some problems in those kids could possibly be averted.

This bears repeating.

I am so glad to know that I am not the only one who felt this way. I was shocked and thought so much was very inappropriate and extremely crass.

 

[Trino]

This bears repeating.

I am so glad to know that I am not the only one who felt this way. I was shocked and thought so much was very inappropriate and extremely crass.

Definitely crass, but that seems like what kids are tweeting and saying these days. Where do they get this language? Movies? TV? Video games? Old hat, but in my generation kids never talked like that.

 

[mck16]

Definitely crass, but that seems like what kids are tweeting and saying these days. Where do they get this language? Movies? TV? Video games? Old hat, but in my generation kids never talked like that.

Parents never talked like that either. Now days everyone talks like that. I think the biggest offenders are the reality shows. Ever watch any of the Real Housewife shows. Profanity is over the top. jmo

 

[FragileSugar]

Definitely crass, but that seems like what kids are tweeting and saying these days. Where do they get this language? Movies? TV? Video games? Old hat, but in my generation kids never talked like that.

I have 14 year old and a 16 year old. I have access to their FB accounts which neither ever use. I log on them regularly to see what their friends are up to. I don't see anything about sex,drugs, etc. From her friends. Same with Instagram. Twitter is a pain to use and navigate to be honest. Maybe kids know this and that's why kids are more open on it? I can't believe how much drug/sex talk there was on the Washington kids' twitter accounts especially considering these kids were 14. It wasn't even limited to Jaylen and the victims- lots of their mutual friends had raunchy tweets too. I don't shock easily but I was this time. Am I the only nosy parent when it comes to my kids social networks?

 

[Frigga]

I have 14 year old and a 16 year old. I have access to their FB accounts which neither ever use. I log on them regularly to see what their friends are up to. I don't see anything about sex,drugs, etc. From her friends. Same with Instagram. Twitter is a pain to use and navigate to be honest. Maybe kids know this and that's why kids are more open on it? I can't believe how much drug/sex talk there was on the Washington kids' twitter accounts especially considering these kids were 14. It wasn't even limited to Jaylen and the victims- lots of their mutual friends had raunchy tweets too. I don't shock easily but I was this time. Am I the only nosy parent when it comes to my kids social networks?

No, you are not.

I'm not one to subscribe to the "oh... everyone's doing it" mantra. My kids would have their mouths washed out with soap if I ever caught them speaking like that and there would be hours and hours of discussion in our household about it. If I ever saw writings from them- similar to those I have seen on JF page- that would be shut down, pronto, and again- hours and hours of discussions would be had. I am NOT old fashioned in the least, I just believe that words are very powerful and what we send out in to the universe in thoughts and words should reflect respect for ourselves and others.

Who was mentoring this young man in his family? Who was setting an example for behavior? Why was no one seemingly paying attention?

 

[Tink56]

Being on life support is keeping the body alive while organ donation is being considered. It is possible that the hospital can report no changes, while the relatives can be reporting death.


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk

I read social media last evening that confirms your theory. It does take 1 or 2 days for the organ donation process to be completed. (We have seen this in a couple of instances in the last year or so....)

 

[mnegri1973]

I have 14 year old and a 16 year old. I have access to their FB accounts which neither ever use. I log on them regularly to see what their friends are up to. I don't see anything about sex,drugs, etc. From her friends. Same with Instagram. Twitter is a pain to use and navigate to be honest. Maybe kids know this and that's why kids are more open on it? I can't believe how much drug/sex talk there was on the Washington kids' twitter accounts especially considering these kids were 14. It wasn't even limited to Jaylen and the victims- lots of their mutual friends had raunchy tweets too. I don't shock easily but I was this time. Am I the only nosy parent when it comes to my kids social networks?

I was also shocked. My dd is 19, when she was younger I had access to all of her social media and I even read her texts, which were plain and very boring. I was shocked when reading this groups FB and Twitter feeds. Maybe my dd is just more open with me and her dad but she tells me everything. Many times I've sat up with her and gave helped her and her friends with social issues. I just find it so hard that not one of these kids brought it to their parents or an adults attention.

I've also found it hard to understand how these kids are posting things about the shooter like, "I've got your back bro." Or telling people to ST*U when comments are made about the shooter. I really hope this school gets these kids help.

Mel


Sent from my iPad using Tapatalk HD

 

[Frigga]

^^^ Very, very sad and probably true. God help all those affected by this senseless tragedy!