Found Deceased WY - Gabrielle ‘Gabby’ Petito, 22, Grand Teton National Park, 25 Aug 2021 #83

[10ofRods]

Thanks for the reply and I agree.

It's 100% true that we have almost no facts about the Laundries and certainly none about their family dynamics. Perhaps, with no real info to go on, we view the situation through the lens of our own experiences. In my case, the kids in my family never, ever, ever told our parents anything. So the fact that Brian might have successfully hidden what had happened to Gabby seems 100% plausible to me. "Um, yeah, we broke up. She left the van with me. I'm fine. I don't want to talk about it. Let's get the kids and go camping." IMO, people who have a normally open relationship with their parents believe Brian talked to them or at least had trouble hiding things from them. Maybe. No one knows what's actually true. Although, we saw how smoothly he could manipulate a situation at the Moab stop.

What really stumps me and makes me think the Laundries were kind of clueless about their son is the fact they let him go to Carlton Reserve alone, didn't follow him there, didn't check on him sooner. Half of WS believed he had killed himself. He was an obvious suicide risk, but his own parents didn't realize it? That makes no sense whatsoever unless they did not know the depth of his troubles. JMO

I think there are other possibilities. As you say, families are different (very different). It's hard to know what one would do in that situation, as the parents. People have different views on the morality of terminating our lives, and certainly, the alternative for BL was one that, perhaps, his parents knew he would find intolerable. It's very hard to stop a grown up from doing what they are bent on doing, when it comes to such serious events. BL's life was over, from his point of view (and from mine, too).

I think that had BL been flagrantly suicidal right in the family home (holding a gun to his head; in possession of sufficient medication of a type to be a successful suicide and threatening to take them, etc), the family most likely would have called 911 and tried to Baker Act him (which is not easy, as many suicidal people perk right up when talking to the ER personnel or the ER psychiatrist).

 

[BetteDavisEyes]

The van's Florida registration said she lived there. The story that they'd moved to NY seems to be a rather recent story from the NPPD. It's odd neither NS nor JS who actually live in NY ever mentioned that move. And it's odd JP said he moved to FL (I think as recently as this past summer) to be close to GP. JMO

This has always puzzled me. It seems that GP and BL had been planning and saving for their road trip for months. Why would JP have relocated to FL if his daughter was going to be spending months or longer traveling across the country?

 

[NCWatcher]

This has always puzzled me. It seems that GP and BL had been planning and saving for their road trip for months. Why would JP have relocated to FL if his daughter was going to be spending months or longer traveling across the country?

I don't know.

But my best guess is JP asked for a transfer to FL from his company. And it may have taken awhile for that to come through. He also has kids so he may have wanted to move in the summer to let them finish their school year in NY.

I could be wrong but I'm not sure GP's parents & step-parents saw GP as really doing a permanent kind of van-life. I think they saw it more as a long trip and that's how they talked about it when interviewed. Not a new way of nomadic life with no fixed address. But if BL & GP actually decided to move to NY and did so in early June, that must have been a big surprise to the Florida-bound Petitos. Personally I'm not sure I buy that they moved. Certainly "best friend" Rose never said so and she probably would have had she known.
JMO

 

[10ofRods]

This has always puzzled me. It seems that GP and BL had been planning and saving for their road trip for months. Why would JP have relocated to FL if his daughter was going to be spending months or longer traveling across the country?

Because he wanted to move to FL? It's probably a basic reason why he moved - Gabby being there is an additional reason, but I'm guessing that like many NYers, he simply wanted to move to FL, where he thought, at least, he wouldn't be completely without family.

I don't know.

But my best guess is JP asked for a transfer to FL from his company. And it may have taken awhile for that to come through. He also has kids so he may have wanted to move in the summer to let them finish their school year in NY.

I could be wrong but I'm not sure GP's parents & step-parents saw GP as really doing a permanent kind of van-life. I think they saw it more as a long trip and that's how they talked about it when interviewed. Not a new way of nomadic life with no fixed address. But if BL & GP actually decided to move to NY and did so in early June, that must have been a big surprise to the Florida-bound Petitos. Personally I'm not sure I buy that they moved. Certainly "best friend" Rose never said so and she probably would have had she known.
JMO

I think so too. In fact, it's one reason I'm so interested in "Van Life." Its very nature is ambiguous and if practiced full time, is actually classified in most places as "homelessness." I'm pretty sure that Gabby and BL did not think of themselves as permanently on the road, they knew they had some places they could come back to roost. I think that's true of many Van Lifers - they may want to spend most of the year on the road, but in the winter, they drift south if they can, and park at some family member's house or a friend's. People are constantly allowing Van Life friends to park in their driveway on reddit (especially in big cities).

Near Yosemite, where the park actively limits the number of nights a van can stay, Van Lifers leave the park and there are several known houses with fairly large acreage where they can park (these are the climbers and hikers). There are also several other campgrounds (also with time limitations, but they can be combined in various ways to get a Van Lifer several months of low cost "rent." Many of these will leave the area in the coldest part of the year and go to Baja for a couple of months. Fishing is good, it's warm, food and beer are cheap.

Gabby and BL would have had 3 places in FL to rotate their winter stay if they wished and family allowed it (I believe they would have). And a place in New York, too, for part of the year. I do think this is the basic pattern for Van Lifers - not completely on the road all the year, but trying to avoid permanent living anywhere.

 

[NCWatcher]

Because he wanted to move to FL? It's probably a basic reason why he moved - Gabby being there is an additional reason, but I'm guessing that like many NYers, he simply wanted to move to FL, where he thought, at least, he wouldn't be completely without family.

Very well could be. It's my understanding there are more reasons to leave NY than there used to be given federal tax changes. But JP said he moved to FL to "keep an eye on G" and seemed to mean it.
JMO

 

[FindingJoLee]

I know it's been inferred (based on the changed camping arrangements at Ft DeSoto from 2 persons to 3) that Brian communicated that he would be returning to Florida rather than arriving unannounced. But is it known when he communicated that (before he left Wyoming, somewhere along the way)...and whose phone he used to contact them?

 

[EvieIvyOver]

I'm right here with you.

If BL had told his parents early on about what had happened, and the Ls were the horrible, callous people so many are calling them, why would they NOT have prepped him to go on the run and help hide him forever? They didn't do that. They took him to visit their grandkids, go camping, shopping, biking, etc. Murder does not just go away. I do not think a new phone would have been purchased had they hoped he would turn himself in or known his intentions of suicide, either. And why not call SB sooner? There's just nothing in their behavior in those first 10 days to indicate that they knew GP was dead. JMO.

But, from the 10th on...tables had turned.

I remind myself how important it is to remember that by the 13th, when BL went to the swamp, GP was only a missing person. The van was impounded, but basically, that was it. Nobody knew anything yet. No search or arrest warrants, no tips to Spread Creek, no body, nothing. I'm sure BL figured it was just a matter of time, but he could have waited it out. Instead, he likely killed himself. I think he didn't want to live with his family, GP's family, or himself knowing what he had done. JMO.

What if Brian had told his parents, when he flew home in August, that they were ending their trip. When he arrived in September, he may have said that he had driven Gabby to their new residence in New York, and he was visiting them before he moved back to New York with her, and that he would be picking up their stuff to take back with him. The parents wouldn't have suspected anything was wrong--until the phone calls started.

Possibly the source of their contention was the fact that he was done with that trip, and she wasn't willing to concede that the time had come to end it.

 

[Balthazar]

What really stumps me and makes me think the Laundries were kind of clueless about their son is the fact they let him go to Carlton Reserve alone, didn't follow him there, didn't check on him sooner. Half of WS believed he had killed himself. He was an obvious suicide risk, but his own parents didn't realize it? That makes no sense whatsoever unless they did not know the depth of his troubles. JMO

Denial runs deep with many parents. I know of more than one family where an adult son committed suicide, but made an outcry call to the parents first. Guess what? In none of the cases did the parents call the police for a welfare check on their adult child, even if they thought the call was weird or off in some way.

<modsnip>

 

[Mom24]

This has always puzzled me. It seems that GP and BL had been planning and saving for their road trip for months. Why would JP have relocated to FL if his daughter was going to be spending months or longer traveling across the country?

My guess would be that Gabby and Brian were planning to live in FL.

 

[FindingJoLee]

I wonder when the Laundrie parents realized that Brian had murdered Gabby and what that moment was like when they realized they hadn't been tuned in to the fact that he had been lying for {insert however many days there were between her murder and their understanding that he murdered her.}

 

[BetteDavisEyes]

My guess would be that Gabby and Brian were planning to live in FL.

If the recent reports of Gabby and Brian allegedly moving back to NY are true, I wonder if JP would have moved back to "keep an eye on" his daughter? I suppose it's a moot point now since the young couple isn't here any longer

“For never was a story of more woe than this of Juliet and her Romeo.”

― William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

 

[ktm44]

YES!! It's SO frustrating to try to sort that out!! And it's exactly why I said earlier (somewhere in the previous 84 threads) something to the effect of....

• I can't see how they could have possibly known all along. (We're camping, we're biking, we're mowing the lawn, we're visiting the grand babies....what kind of diabolical people can behave like that if they know their child has murdered his girlfriend??)
• And yet, I can't see how they didn't know all along. (What kind of totally extinct parents of a child that's lived with them most of 23 years would be so bereft of common sense, intuition, questions, etc....)

I'm still totally mystified by either option!

Those seem like the kind of things that parents would do to help their children through a bad breakup.

 

[10ofRods]

Very well could be. It's my understanding there are more reasons to leave NY than there used to be given federal tax changes. But JP said he moved to FL to "keep an eye on G" and seemed to mean it.
JMO

But didn't he end up living 3 hours away from North Port? Or have I got that wrong?

And why does Gabby need his eye on her? Protection? Is she incompetent in some way? Still a child in his view? Acting out? It's a strange thing to say, really. "I wanted to be closer to my oldest daughter," would not be so strange. But this "keep eyes on" thing doesn't sit right with me.

 

[Skigirl]

If the recent reports of Gabby and Brian allegedly moving back to NY are true, I wonder if JP would have moved back to "keep an eye on" his daughter? I suppose it's a moot point now since the young couple isn't here any longer

“For never was a story of more woe than this of Juliet and her Romeo.”

― William Shakespeare, Romeo and Juliet

Moo, this was not as much like Romeo and Juliet, as it was like MacBeth (if we are sticking with Shakespeare) or, if we're going for realism, An American Murder: The Family Next Door.

 

[Auntie Cipation]

I'll probably never know who knew what when, but when a couple calls off an engagement vs postpones a wedding, something is wrong. As a parent, I'd want to know why are you calling off the engagement. Being young as a reason to call off vs postpone doesn't work for me. Some signs of trouble had to be present before this van trip.

MOO

NPPD recently stated that Gabby and BL had moved to New York BEFORE leaving for their road trip, so the Laundrie's house was no longer her place of residence (if it ever actually was.). So, it was no longer a matter of her not being home, at least at the Laundrie's house, it was a matter of BL having the vehicle at his parents house.

Something about this has bugged me since the beginning of this case. I think I saw NS being quoted, or maybe it was in the missing person info she provided, that GP's residence was in NY and not FL.

What I suspect (entirely MOO) is that during the course of this trip, maybe even due to the Moab incident, GP had decided not to stick with BL. I think she had told her mom this info and was looking for the right time/way to tell BL. I think that sadly backfired on her and he responded with violence.

But I think that is why NS asserted that NY was [again] GP's residence.

The van's Florida registration said she lived there. The story that they'd moved to NY seems to be a rather recent story from the NPPD. It's odd neither NS nor JS who actually live in NY ever mentioned that move. And it's odd JP said he moved to FL (I think as recently as this past summer) to be close to GP.
JMO

Again, I do think NS made this claim. Will see if I can find it. As to the reasons JP moved:

JP said he moved to FL to "keep an eye on G" and seemed to mean it.
JMO

Again from very early in the case I saw JP quoted as describing GP as a "free spirit" and "impulsive". That word impulsive pricked my ears in terms of what he might have been specifically worried about, but I never saw it mentioned again.

MOO

 

[LinneaE]

I know it's been inferred (based on the changed camping arrangements at Ft DeSoto from 2 persons to 3) that Brian communicated that he would be returning to Florida rather than arriving unannounced. But is it known when he communicated that (before he left Wyoming, somewhere along the way)...and whose phone he used to contact them?

No. We have no information about calls made/received from either Gabby's or BL's phones after Aug 30th

 

[TL4S]

Something about this has bugged me since the beginning of this case. I think I saw NS being quoted, or maybe it was in the missing person info she provided, that GP's residence was in NY and not FL.

What I suspect (entirely MOO) is that during the course of this trip, maybe even due to the Moab incident, GP had decided not to stick with BL. I think she had told her mom this info and was looking for the right time/way to tell BL. I think that sadly backfired on her and he responded with violence.

But I think that is why NS asserted that NY was [again] GP's residence.



Again, I do think NS made this claim. Will see if I can find it. As to the reasons JP moved:



Again from very early in the case I saw JP quoted as describing GP as a "free spirit" and "impulsive". That word impulsive pricked my ears in terms of what he might have been specifically worried about, but I never saw it mentioned again.

MOO

Iirc, it's been noted that on the missing person report NS filed for GP, the location of expected return was to the mothers. Is this correct?

 

[NCWatcher]

But didn't he end up living 3 hours away from North Port? Or have I got that wrong?

And why does Gabby need his eye on her? Protection? Is she incompetent in some way? Still a child in his view? Acting out? It's a strange thing to say, really. "I wanted to be closer to my oldest daughter," would not be so strange. But this "keep eyes on" thing doesn't sit right with me.

Yes, I agree. But it's hard to tell with JP sometimes if he's saying things for effect. While I think he does that, I'm not sure the words he chooses always have the effect he intended. For example, he may have intended to convey he would always feel a father's love for GP. But instead he seemed to infantilize her.

And while ~3 hrs from North Port isn't next door, its much closer than Long Island at nearly 20 hours away.
JMO

 

[NCWatcher]

Iirc, it's been noted that on the missing person report NS filed for GP, the location of expected return was to the mothers. Is this correct?

Yes but that happened after NS tried repeatedly to file elsewhere. She did not try to file in NY initially. It sounds like that "new address" was to facilitate the filing of the Missing Person report.

JMO

 

[Skigirl]

Something about this has bugged me since the beginning of this case. I think I saw NS being quoted, or maybe it was in the missing person info she provided, that GP's residence was in NY and not FL.

What I suspect (entirely MOO) is that during the course of this trip, maybe even due to the Moab incident, GP had decided not to stick with BL. I think she had told her mom this info and was looking for the right time/way to tell BL. I think that sadly backfired on her and he responded with violence.

But I think that is why NS asserted that NY was [again] GP's residence.



Again, I do think NS made this claim. Will see if I can find it. As to the reasons JP moved:



Again from very early in the case I saw JP quoted as describing GP as a "free spirit" and "impulsive". That word impulsive pricked my ears in terms of what he might have been specifically worried about, but I never saw it mentioned again.

MOO

I think that GP was questioning the relationship, and may have told him that she was leaving, but I don't think she told her parents that. Her mom said early on that she was starting to wonder if the relationship was what it seemed, and she also said that she felt comfortable with the trip because she thought BL would take care of GP. I got the impression that she was saying that she was wondering about the relationship because she thought everything was fine (except for some tension due to the close quarters) before her daughter disappeared. I think that she gave her address as GP's address simply to get the NY police to accept the MP report, because she hadn't had luck getting the Northport police to accept one. MOO.