2010.07.01 - The Oregonian and Willamette Week not invited to the presser

[raeann]

How would you feel if ... today, instead of Kaine giving the press ground-rules introduction, it had been the 3 parent's representative - either a PR/media rep or an attorney. Same exact speech. Same exact calling out of the Oregonian & the WW. Same exact plea from one of those papers (oregonian) for reconsideration - which worked, and the same exact flee & whine-about-getting-kicked-out blog from the other paper.

Close your eyes. Picture this authoritarian press liason figure representing the family, instead of Kaine doing it himself...and go...repeat the day's events.

How would you feel now?

I would feel exactly the same because all it would have taken is two phone calls this morning to tell them you're not invited. There was no need for the public 'spanking', it was immature and petty no matter who did it, and it only detracted....actually destroyed.....any focus on Kyron.

 

[Emma Peel]

I would feel exactly the same because all it would have taken is two phone calls this morning to tell them you're not invited. There was no need for the public 'spanking', it was immature and petty no matter who did it, and it only detracted....actually destroyed.....any focus on Kyron.

Maybe I should have been more specific, I'm sorry. My question was kind of incomplete - I'll edit it too...

I should have asked: who would you be annoyed with for this media faux pas?

 

[Mrs G Norris]

I think LE thought they were going to be really 'clever' with this one, and use all these great 'psychological tricks' to freak out TH and get her to confess, and they were WRONG. She isn't budging, their tactics are so obvious its making people furious because they feel like they're being manipulated.

I think this is a classic case of 'over thinking' a situation, instead of just going in, doing a bit of good old fashioned police work, and getting it done.

JMO of course.

 

[MsFacetious]

(BBM)
I prefer jounalists/media who are persistant and determined to get the real story, rather than a media that is spoon-fed and/or can only air or print what's on the menu, so to say... JMHO ~

See I'm so confused, I don't know what I prefer. I am simply pointing out the very obvious difference here... and wondering why that is.

 

[raeann]

Maybe I should have been more specific, I'm sorry. My question was kind of incomplete - I'll edit it too...

I should have asked: who would you be annoyed with for this media faux pas?

My answer either way would be the 3 who made this spectacle happen. I guess I just expect them to show the same kind of respect that they are demanding. The one thing I know absolutely for sure that would happen if I were in this situation is that I would be gushing my thanks to everyone who was interested in the case and helping in any way. The one huge thing I would be very aware of would be thanking the local TAXPAYERS who were the ones sacrificing other services to pay for the millions of dollars being spent on trying to find my child. The whole STATE has spent money and personnel on this search. Before I would be playing hissy-pissy at ANYONE, I would be humble and thankful to all involved--and that would include the media.

jmo

 

[CCup]

I think we need to attempt to put ourselves in their shoes. Imagine....your 7 year old son is missing and has been for the last month. You are on the worst rollercoaster ride of your life.

Everything that you have done in your life, every decision you have made, every marriage, divorce, past relationships, your personal info including your medical history is being publicized in just about every mainstream media in the country.

When you didn't do interviews they talked about why you didn't, when you did the interviews they scrutinized what you said and what you didn't say.

The way you looked on tv, the way you fix your hair, the way you show no emotion, people are wondering if your eyelashes are real, people across the whole freakin country(and some overseas) are talkin about your every move. And what is it doing to bring your son home?

Random friends or acquaintances are talking on your behalf or sharing personal info about you. Every picture you have taken over the last 7 years is posted on every news website, Nancy Grace is running a slideshow of your life in pics nightly, these pics are being looked through for any and every flaw.

You have no control over what some people are saying, what some people are doing, and most horrifying you have NO control of where your son is or what is happening to him.

You are at a breaking point and the only thing you can control is what you say and who you say it to! You get to pick what the media hears from you and you get to pick what media publishes it first hand.

Imagine having no control over what is happening to your child and then try imagining what you would do! I can honestly say that I too would attempt to control what the media releases at this point. JMO

 

[curiousgal]

I think we need to attempt to put ourselves in their shoes. Imagine....your 7 year old son is missing and has been for the last month. You are on the worst rollercoaster ride of your life.

Everything that you have done in your life, every decision you have made, every marriage, divorce, past relationships, your personal info including your medical history is being publicized in just about every mainstream media in the country.

When you didn't do interviews they talked about why you didn't, when you did the interviews they scrutinized what you said and what you didn't say.

The way you looked on tv, the way you fix your hair, the way you show no emotion, people are wondering if your eyelashes are real, people across the whole freakin country(and some overseas) are talkin about your every move. And what is it doing to bring your son home?

Random friends or acquaintances are talking on your behalf or sharing personal info about you. Every picture you have taken over the last 7 years is posted on every news website, Nancy Grace is running a slideshow of your life in pics nightly, these pics are being looked through for any and every flaw.

You have no control over what some people are saying, what some people are doing, and most horrifying you have NO control of where your son is or what is happening to him.

You are at a breaking point and the only thing you can control is what you say and who you say it to! You get to pick what the media hears from you and you get to pick what media publishes it first hand.

Imagine having no control over what is happening to your child and then try imagining what you would do! I can honestly say that I too would attempt to control what the media releases at this point. JMO

Thank you for your post, puts it all back into perspective for sure!! So many judgement calls and speculation and really we have nothing to go on, other than Kyron is still not home with his family!

 

[CCup]

My answer either way would be the 3 who made this spectacle happen. I guess I just expect them to show the same kind of respect that they are demanding. The one thing I know absolutely for sure that would happen if I were in this situation is that I would be gushing my thanks to everyone who was interested in the case and helping in any way. The one huge thing I would be very aware of would be thanking the local TAXPAYERS who were the ones sacrificing other services to pay for the millions of dollars being spent on trying to find my child. The whole STATE has spent money and personnel on this search. Before I would be playing hissy-pissy at ANYONE, I would be humble and thankful to all involved--and that would include the media.

jmo

I realize that today's statement came off a little rugged around the edges, but these poor people are under tremendous stress. They have thanked the media, the community, and LE every other time that spoke. I do not think that they are unappreciative of anything positive being done on their and Kyron's behalf.

Truly, there was no need for any of us to know about any of the personal details of their lives, including Kaine and Terri's impending divorce. I think it has gave us great insight into their lives, but why do we need insight into their lives? LE is the only people that need to know every detail of their lives. All we need to know is when and where he went missing, what he had on, and what he looks like. JMO

 

[raeann]

Recognizing all of that as very stressful and agonizing.....most of that applies to TH and not to these three. What they have done this week is pile on to that and make it exponentially worse, resulting in a backlash that is landing on themselves. Regardless, in their position, I know I would maintain my respect for others, and be thankful for all help and concern. I would do this if for no other reason than to hope karma would pay it back to my child wherever they might be.

jmo

 

[cluciano63]

I'm afraid it all goes back to the parents staying silent in the early days. The media had to find something to write about since no one was talking or looking for press attention and so they dug up the rather colorful family dynamics with the convoluted tales of marriages and divorces and children moving around, etc...

Perhaps that would not have happened if the Hormans had been taking interviews from the start, who knows.

In any case, this is what is has become, and the focus HAS been taken away from Kyron, as every article in the press this week has been about the divorce, the restraining order or today's partial-PC, for example. And since LE won't talk, they have nothing else to write about, and still keep Kyron somehow in the news. But he is getting in there in a very third-hand kind of way.

 

[CCup]

Reeann, I agree with you on respecting others and being thankful for the help and concern, but how respectful is digging up and airing these people's dirty laundry? Or scrutinizing their every move? They didn't ask to be in this situation and they don't deserve to be picked apart. And honestly I would have kicked the WW news reporter out too. They are clearly sensationalizing the story to get more internet hits. These reporters would have to give me respect to get my respect. And talking to ex-husbands, posting divorce papers, demanding documents be unsealed, and repeatedlly asking the same questions that have been said will not be answered, is not earning them any respect.

JMO.

 

[sofia76]

All I can think at this point is that maybe this is KH's way of responding to stress - also, it seems that something happened over the weekend to make him file for divorce from the woman he's been with for 8 years, with apparently very little warning. Maybe he is trying to "take charge" of the situation?

Who knows. I just hope all the major truths come out in the next few weeks, or at least that Kyron is found.

 

[Emma Peel]

My answer either way would be the 3 who made this spectacle happen. I guess I just expect them to show the same kind of respect that they are demanding. The one thing I know absolutely for sure that would happen if I were in this situation is that I would be gushing my thanks to everyone who was interested in the case and helping in any way. The one huge thing I would be very aware of would be thanking the local TAXPAYERS who were the ones sacrificing other services to pay for the millions of dollars being spent on trying to find my child. The whole STATE has spent money and personnel on this search. Before I would be playing hissy-pissy at ANYONE, I would be humble and thankful to all involved--and that would include the media.

jmo

Agreed. They were pretty thankful last Saturday in their interviews, I found. But I do agree it would have been nice for them to thank reporters today too.

 

[Faulkner]

I'm not sure where the assumption is coming from that people are unwilling to look at this from the family's perspective. Because it is clear that people are -- including Mark Klaas who was in their shoes -- and are saying that they still don't get excluding press from a press conference with the stated purpose of finding Kyron and then doing things that are clearly contradictory to that goal. It may be because of stress or it may be indicative of red flags that deserve a closer look solely in the interest of finding the truth about what happened to Kyron.

 

[raeann]

Reeann, I agree with you on respecting others and being thankful for the help and concern, but how respectful is digging up and airing these people's dirty laundry? Or scrutinizing their every move? They didn't ask to be in this situation and they don't deserve to be picked apart. And honestly I would have kicked the WW news reporter out too. They are clearly sensationalizing the story to get more internet hits. These reporters would have to give me respect to get my respect. And talking to ex-husbands, posting divorce papers, demanding documents be unsealed, and repeatedlly asking the same questions that have been said will not be answered, is not earning them any respect.

JMO.

LOL....from the beginning of this case I have been the staunchest of supporters of NOT dragging out the derogatory comments.....believe me, I have probably angered many here by advocating restraint in order to protect the innocent children at the very least. I don't think that any of the hateful and hurtful things said about any of the parents has added one ounce of help in solving the case. My objection to the pc today, is that I see the other three parents as having jumped on the trash the sm bandwagon and now are leading the charge. I don't see how this can possibly help. Thus, I still advocate for humility, respect and restraint. I was one of the first to say that the WW article was out of line. However, what was done today is wrong ethically and has now probably assured the continued digging into personal lives.

jmoo

 

[joshiesmom]

So maybe this is petty, but this comment really bugs me:

"Kaine said they miss Kyron’s toothless smile, belly laugh and him just being around."

Kyron doesn't have a toothless smile. Why would his dad say he does? :waitasec:

Link

 

[Calliope]

How would you feel if ... today, instead of Kaine giving the press ground-rules introduction, it had been the 3 parent's representative - either a PR/media rep or an attorney. Same exact speech. Same exact calling out of the Oregonian & the WW. Same exact plea from one of those papers (oregonian) for reconsideration - which worked, and the same exact flee & whine-about-getting-kicked-out blog from the other paper.

Close your eyes. Picture this authoritarian press liason figure representing the family, instead of Kaine doing it himself...and go...repeat the day's events.

How would you feel now? And who would you be annoyed with for this media faux pas?

I'd feel the same.

 

[sherbetjello]

Maybe I should have been more specific, I'm sorry. My question was kind of incomplete - I'll edit it too...

I should have asked: who would you be annoyed with for this media faux pas?

Sounds like this station/website needs a lot of attention and or advertisements.

I read both, and katu lost my respect at breaching their privacy policies.

 

[raeann]

So maybe this is petty, but this comment really bugs me:

"Kaine said they miss Kyron’s toothless smile, belly laugh and him just being around."

Kyron doesn't have a toothless smile. Why would his dad say he does? :waitasec:

Link

True, and hmmm......maybe he hasn't been around Kyron much in the last few months to notice those teeth are all in, as seen in the latest pictures. Maybe it is just his favorite way to remember him. I'll go with that last one to give KH the benefit of the doubt here.

jmo

 

[curiousgal]

So maybe this is petty, but this comment really bugs me:

"Kaine said they miss Kyron’s toothless smile, belly laugh and him just being around."

Kyron doesn't have a toothless smile. Why would his dad say he does? :waitasec:

Link

Depends on which picture you look at I suppose?