I'm another not buying this friend had a true window into her Karen's life. I know what the snags are in my closest friends' relationships, the mundane difficulties of decades long relationships that are overall going along well, and we discuss wider family dysfunction - it is not prying to ask after a friend's stepson. I routinely ask my friends how so&so in their extended family is going and they do the same. That is how intimate friendships are, you know each other's lives. And even if she kept one aspect close to her chest, if it was too painful to talk about, to just be presenting as if everything is hunky dory seems a bit alarming. If this was the nature of her friendships I feel sad for her even if her relationships with her husband and daughter were great. There are certain things you shouldn't discuss with them that you might need to get off your chest, like details of your marriage with your child, and sometimes you can't truly blow off steam with with your partner on all scores - when you are both involved they might find it a recrimination if you need to express negative feelings or thoughts. What did she do when AR rang? Did she have someone to sit over coffee with for hours to nut it out, with someone who wasn't going to feel as upset and responsible as Borce? When I have a tough time my friends keep me afloat because they know what is troubling me but they are only affected in that they have empathy for me, not directly affected.
