Ok. thanks. I'm wondering about her compulsion to adopt children, almost like she is replaceing the ones she sighned away, (No offense, lack of better wording in my tired mind)
I gave 3 children up. and I did want more. I knew this. I wanted 3. Not too replace my children, because they can never be replaced, but because I did want to be a mom, just at 19, was not my time. I have always wanted to raise 3. was it a subconsience thing? IDK, but it was a sort of compulsion. KWIM?? am I makeing any sense? I'm trying to get into TS' mind, useing my on experiences. apparently it's working, because I have misspelled so many words, LOL.
anyway, even when I had my first after adoption(number4), I was so scared to love him, and bond. I did, but in a weird stand offish kind of way. I am just now able to love my 3 children at home, with no holds barred, without being scared I would "fail". I guess my point if there is one, TS should surely be Scarred on the inside, and that affects people differently. loseing a child or more than one is almost like death itself. Maybe, just maybe, the fact that she had the emergency historectomy, though at the time was not so bad, she had her kids, is what kind of drove her? she couldn't have a child with Jack. But she desperatley needs too "replace" the ones she lost? and H fell into their laps quite nicely. Now H needs a sibling??
Gosh hope that makes some kind of sense? and don't hate me, LOL, Just trying to shine a tiny insight on how things can be for someone who gives up children. by force or choice. My kids were 5, 3, and 1 yrs old. It hurt like h@ll