Breastfeeding at 8 - OMG!!!

[Glow]

see now i disagreed with the start of glow's post. why should we be alarmed if a boy begins to reach puberty early? once a boy begins to reach puberty he will see the breast as a sex object. that is normal and natural. the breast are sex objects. yes they provide nourishment for a child at some points but they provide sexual pleasure for most women. breast can be both a item the mother uses to nurture her child and a object of sexual desire. as children age they should be able to see the difference. i am alarmed by those that claim the breast is not a sex object. to ignore the dual function the body part plays is not healthy imo.

We should be alarmed if 8 year old boys are beginning to display their secondary sexual characteristics. Something in our environment would probably be causing that. Sure it could happen randomly here or there but statistically, 8 years old need to be pre pubescent. "Around" the time a child reaches the teenage years, puberty or sexual development occurs. In boys, the first sign is a change in color and size of the testicles. Anything that prompts a child to "see" things as sexual BEFORE his body begins to nudge him in that direction is societal based and not hormonally based.

Evolutionarily speaking, the female breast has three functions.

#1 It is a one of several "target" zones to attract males, along with full red lips and flared hips.

#2 It is an erogenous zone for female sexual excitement.

# 3 To provide antibodies, nourishment and emotional bonding for offspring

Of course #1 causes #2 and that creates a need for # 3. Natures ability to create the perfect "multi tasker is awesomely amazing!

Many of our body parts have dual purposes. Hands can hit and destroy and they can heal and create. Our eyes can flirt with a handsome man and they can reassure a small child looking up into them. The breasts playing 3 roles is just more of the same.

 

[JBean]

You sure know how to write Glow.

 

[Glow]

You sure know how to write Glow.

jbean did you look at the tags at the bottom of this page?

Did it make you think of me?

 

[JBean]

jbean did you look at the tags at the bottom of this page?

Did it make you think of me?

yes! It did make me think of you. You crazy breastfeeder lady lolololol.

 

[luthersmama]

Seems to me there are a couple of different ways of approaching this question.

1. Biological needs

2. Social norms

1. Although there may be biological reasons why breastmilk is good from an immunologic standpoint, I have trouble with the idea that there is a nutritional advantage. If the child is old enough to ingest the same food that the mother ingests, then there is an advantage to having the child process that food directly rather than having the mother "pre process" it and then pass it on to the child. A family that requires the mother to be a nutritional intermediary well past the point when the child can process and digest food is going to have a disadvantage.

2. Even if you believe that there may be good reasons in SOME populations to endorse breastfeeding past the age of about 5, the fact is that it is an aberration in western developed countries. If a child is raised in a household that has freakish habits, they will be regarded as a freak. That is not a good thing. Social norms can take a bad turn, of course, but being so totally out of step with one's neighbors and the child's peers can't be good for the child, unless there is a REALLY REALLY good health reason, religious reason or something like that.

 

[Glow]

yes! It did make me think of you. You crazy breastfeeder lady lolololol.

PLUS dairy farmer! (sigh) I am doomed :crazy:

 

[pedinurse]

ok, that's f&%$ing gross. sorry for the strong reaction, but i literally had to turn it off only seconds into it. I was only able to watch until the kid was like asking for and going down the shirt and i'm like... ugh, can't do it!!
and as a peds nurse, i am all about bfing and even extended breastfeeding (until like, age two or so). i see breastfeeding all the time! heck, i would have glady BF on into the second year of life, however, my son self weaned at 11 months when he started eating more table foods. he got pumped milk that I had saved going to work and stuff until he was 12 months. heck, i think i still have some in the back of the deep freeze i need to throw out!! i was a little sad to see it end, but i was ready to move on into real clothing!! and let me tell you, I breastfed everywhere. give me a receiving blanket and my baby, and no one was any more the wiser. but never would i... flaunt such a thing i guess? here, video tape me breastfeeding!!

the AAP says that BF should be continued until it is no longer beneficial for the mother and child. i have read studies that say that BFing is no longer benficial after 3 years of age (at the 4 year old mark...) so prolonged breastfeeding, in developing countries and stuff... it makes sense this is because of mother's antibodies to illness and disease... not really a nutritional standpoint past a certain point.

HOWEVER...

this is just sooo wrong, and another thing, not socially acceptable!! while she has the right too i guess, there will be negative reprocussions for the kiddos when they are ID'd in this video!! there is no reason an 8 year old or 5 year old should be BFing!!

 

[philamena]

Glow,
You're provided valuable information on breastfeeding.
FYI- My post on the first page are not meant to be anti-breast feeding but anti older children breastfeeding.

I mentioned sex because my exSIL breastfed all 3 of her babies and she openly admitted she really liked the sensation she got while breastfeeding.

 

[Yeah me]

ETA: I can envision a number of scenarios where offering your breast to an 8 year old would be inappropriate, but this isn't one of them.

Breast feeding is for nourishment while the child cannot fend for themselves, ie. walking, talking, hand eye coordination

This child can eat regular food.
They can walk and they are definitely talking.

Beyond that, it's only a "comfort" and this particular way of comforting a child is highly inappropriate. I am all for cultural diversity, but this goes beyond those limits....to the extreme.

Like I stated earlier, if I were to offer a boob to my now 7yr old, it would be some form of abuse.....possibly sexual. Many people don't "go there" with their own children, but there is a minority of men and women that do. We read about people abusing their own children on this site all of the time. I'm not sure what this woman is getting out of this, but it's not FOR the benefit of her kids, IMO. They can eat solid foods to get all of their nourishment at that age. There is no reasonable excuse for it.

 

[Glow]

Seems to me there are a couple of different ways of approaching this question.

1. Biological needs

2. Social norms

1. Although there may be biological reasons why breastmilk is good from an immunologic standpoint, I have trouble with the idea that there is a nutritional advantage. If the child is old enough to ingest the same food that the mother ingests, then there is an advantage to having the child process that food directly rather than having the mother "pre process" it and then pass it on to the child. A family that requires the mother to be a nutritional intermediary well past the point when the child can process and digest food is going to have a disadvantage.

2. Even if you believe that there may be good reasons in SOME populations to endorse breastfeeding past the age of about 5, the fact is that it is an aberration in western developed countries. If a child is raised in a household that has freakish habits, they will be regarded as a freak. That is not a good thing. Social norms can take a bad turn, of course, but being so totally out of step with one's neighbors and the child's peers can't be good for the child, unless there is a REALLY REALLY good health reason, religious reason or something like that.

Those are some really good points luthersmama.

I got the idea that with the mom in the video it is not being done to supplant the child meeting its own nutritional needs but rather to "let" it be the childs call on when it no longer "wants/needs" the emotional connection being provided.

And you're right, it IS considered an aberration in our society. I also agree that there should be a really good reason health, religous (or other) to steer against the "crowd."

I just dont think that I am the best person to decide that for everybody else, or in this case, this woman.

 

[Glow]

Glow,
You're provided valuable information on breastfeeding.
FYI- My post on the first page are not meant to be anti-breast feeding but anti older children breastfeeding.

I mentioned sex because my exSIL breastfed all 3 of her babies and she openly admitted she really liked the sensation she got while breastfeeding.

I see what you are saying!

 

[southcitymom]

Seems to me there are a couple of different ways of approaching this question.

1. Biological needs

2. Social norms

1. Although there may be biological reasons why breastmilk is good from an immunologic standpoint, I have trouble with the idea that there is a nutritional advantage. If the child is old enough to ingest the same food that the mother ingests, then there is an advantage to having the child process that food directly rather than having the mother "pre process" it and then pass it on to the child. A family that requires the mother to be a nutritional intermediary well past the point when the child can process and digest food is going to have a disadvantage.

2. Even if you believe that there may be good reasons in SOME populations to endorse breastfeeding past the age of about 5, the fact is that it is an aberration in western developed countries. If a child is raised in a household that has freakish habits, they will be regarded as a freak. That is not a good thing. Social norms can take a bad turn, of course, but being so totally out of step with one's neighbors and the child's peers can't be good for the child, unless there is a REALLY REALLY good health reason, religious reason or something like that.

Good post. I don't know that the Mom in this video approached it from either vantage point. She approached it more from a - "when the child is ready, the child will wean" - a standpoint not really rooted in biology or social norms.

It's fairly contradictory to the way I parent. My kids did things like give up pacifers, sippy cups, the breast and diapers when I was ready for them to do that. I mean - I was sensitive to readiness signs - but I was the decision-maker, not them.

I have heard many breast-feeders say the same thing she did - that the child will wean when the child is ready, but even the most rabid breast-feeders I know manipulated that weaning to occur when they were ready!

 

[pedinurse]

Glow,
You're provided valuable information on breastfeeding.
FYI- My post on the first page are not meant to be anti-breast feeding but anti older children breastfeeding.

I mentioned sex because my exSIL breastfed all 3 of her babies and she openly admitted she really liked the sensation she got while breastfeeding.

it does feel good to nurse your baby. you are close to your baby, and it is very relaxing. i usually fell asleep while i nursed, i got so relaxed, especially at night time. other than that it just feels like... a baby nursing. but it is really usually more of an enviroment that parents give their babies while they nurse (quiet, calm, sometimes dark if at night or evening. sometimes you are rocking back and forth with them or laying down with them. whatever) and being close to your infant that makes people feel good. also, there are some thoughts on chemicals in the brain that are "feel good" chemicals, so that might be part of it as well.

 

[southcitymom]

Glow,
You're provided valuable information on breastfeeding.
FYI- My post on the first page are not meant to be anti-breast feeding but anti older children breastfeeding.

I mentioned sex because my exSIL breastfed all 3 of her babies and she openly admitted she really liked the sensation she got while breastfeeding.

Phil,

I am confused. Did your exSIL say that in a yucky way? I mean - once my nipples toughened up - I loved the sensation I got when I breastfed my children - not in a sexual way - but in a lovely, snuggly, satisfied way.

 

[pedinurse]

Good post. I don't know that the Mom in this video approached it from either vantage point. She approached it more from a - "when the child is ready, the child will wean" - a standpoint not really rooted in biology or social norms.

It's fairly contradictory to the way I parent. My kids did things like give up pacifers, sippy cups, the breast and diapers when I was ready for them to do that. I mean - I was sensitive to readiness signs - but I was the decision-maker, not them.

I have heard many breast-feeders say the same thing she did - that the child will wean when the child is ready, but even the most rabid breast-feeders I know manipulated that weaning to occur when they were ready!

i know people who have had send off parties for the pacifier and bottle. LOL... or they put it in the mail and mail it to a baby cousin, or whatever and make the child apart of it. or when they move, they tell the baby "the pacifier got lost in the move. its gone!"

how do you do that with a breast?

 

[JBean]

Phil,

I am confused. Did your exSIL say that in a yucky way? I mean - once my nipples toughened up - I loved the sensation I got when I breastfed my children - not in a sexual way - but in a lovely, snuggly, satisfied way.

Oddly enough, as much as I LOVED nursing, my hormones kicked in whenever they latched on and I got a terrible depressed feeling. I could feel it come over me so I knew it was all hormonal but it was a real buzzkill.

 

[SeriouslySearching]

I personally know a woman who breastfed her son until he was 6. We discussed it many times and she knew I felt it was way over the top. She did not do this around us or in public so I didn't have to be subjected to it. (I would have been quite uncomfortable myself.)

Her stand on it was the benefit not only with the milk, but the emotional impact on him. Her pedicatrician supported her decision to continue until he was ready to stop. (I think he got to school and realized other kids did not breastfeed.)

He is a great kid. Healthy, smart, respectful, and I didn't see any signs he was being harmed by the practice at all. They have a very normal and loving relationship. It had nothing to do with a sexual relationship whatsoever. To her, she was insuring that he never felt a sense of abandonment from her by taking it away.

 

[GlitchWizard]

Bet you the first sleepover party will cure the kids of it.

If not, at least the first boyfriend.

 

[southcitymom]

i know people who have had send off parties for the pacifier and bottle. LOL... or they put it in the mail and mail it to a baby cousin, or whatever and make the child apart of it. or when they move, they tell the baby "the pacifier got lost in the move. its gone!"

how do you do that with a breast?

Well - since the breast belongs to someone else, you just say "This is mine and it's not for you any more!" Now - if you have a thumb-sucker, you're screwed!

I actually don't have a problem with this woman's choice, but was just saying - I';m a different type of parent!

 

[southcitymom]

I personally know a woman who breastfed her son until he was 6. We discussed it many times and she knew I felt it was way over the top. She did not do this around us or in public so I didn't have to be subjected to it. (I would have been quite uncomfortable myself.)

Her stand on it was the benefit not only with the milk, but the emotional impact on him. Her pedicatrician supported her decision to continue until he was ready to stop. (I think he got to school and realized other kids did not breastfeed.)

He is a great kid. Healthy, smart, respectful, and I didn't see any signs he was being harmed by the practice at all. They have a very normal and loving relationship. It had nothing to do with a sexual relationship whatsoever. To her, she was insuring that he never felt a sense of abandonment from her by taking it away.

Thanks for sharing that, SS. It supports my belief that there's nothing inherently harmful about this. It's unusual, to be sure, and it makes LOTS of folks uncomfortable.