Deceased/Not Found CA - Sierra LaMar, 15, Morgan Hill, 16 March 2012 #15 *A. Garcia-Torres guilty*

[sreshowtime]

The lake is closed to boating of all kind between mid-October to mid-April.
The park is open for "shoreline fishing only" 24-hours a day.
snipped from- http://www.sccgov.org/sites/parks/Ride Here/Pages/Coyote-Lake-Harvey-Bear-Ranch-County-Park.aspx

 

[Annie1004]

Perhaps Sierra ate lunch off-campus or after school (I hated the school cafeteria as a teen). Putting money in Sierra's purse doesn't seem odd at all to me. Heck, my mom used to slip 4 or 5 twenties into my purse when I went to visit her and I was in my forties. And how many 15-year-old girls don't rebel against Mom's rules? That's a tough age, no matter what generation. JMO.

PS my mother and I butted heads during my teen years and I was considered a good kid. In retrospect, she was going through menopause while my hormones were changing, too. Explosive situation.

 

[bgmiller5]

It seems very controlling actions.
It makes me think poor Sierra might have had money safety-pinned to the front of her clothes until she was 12 or something.

If you can name me 10 other mothers to whom this seems reasonable
for a 15 year old, I'd be surprised.

It seems to reinforce that Marlene thinks Sierra a very irresponsible person.
If that were the case, it does not comport easily with allowing her to walk a good distance to the bus stop and back home again without immediate supervision.

My son, who is now 19, always forgot his lunch money when he went to school. He took his book bag everywhere he went, even when it wasn't school. Many times I put it in his book bag on my own accord, and sometimes it was in his room. He was a great student, so it wasn't a big deal to either one of us. I don't see how it's controlling at all...no money, no eat. Kids have other things on their minds....jmo.

 

[dog.gone.cute]

Thanks to all for clearing up what ML said on AMW about putting $$ into SL's Juicy bag.

Would love to know what she remembered about what was in the bag, but LE's might have told not to discussed it. If so, then surprised she mentioned the $$, may have been a slip..

BBM:

:seeya: Yes, it would be nice to know what she remember WHAT was in that bag ...

JMO, but I don't think it was a "slip" ...

And JMO, but I think it was an "after thought" ... :waitasec: and I sure would like to know IF she told LE that she put $$$$$ in the JC Handbag when they found the Handbag by the shed ...

JMO and MOO ...

:moo:

 

[houndstooth]

Perhaps Sierra ate lunch off-campus or after school (I hated the school cafeteria as a teen). Putting money in Sierra's purse doesn't seem odd at all to me. Heck, my mom used to slip 4 or 5 twenties into my purse when I went to visit her and I was in my forties. And how many 15-year-old girls don't rebel against Mom's rules? That's a tough age, no matter what generation. JMO.

PS my mother and I butted heads during my teen years and I was considered a good kid. In retrospect, she was going through menopause while my hormones were changing, too. Explosive situation.

Annie,
You are the second poster to mention being an adult having mom slip money into her purse.
There is a different dynamic at work in those cases.
It may be your mom and hers would not want to offend you by offering you a hand out thinking you might refuse it.
Or there are pride issues.
Or there is the aspect of a secret gift.

None of which applies when discussing lunch money of a 15 year old going to school.

 

[bgmiller5]

Me....I did it. Not into a purse as I had boys but I would stick their lunch money in the pocket of their hoodie, or the front zip part of their backpack.

Totally agree. I don't see how this is controlling. I think it's almost the opposite of controlling...I don't think she had much control of her daughter at all. Apparently had no clue of what she was doing in her little virtual world. jmo

 

[Annie1004]

:seeya:

BBM: Respectfully, I disagree ...

JMO, but from Sierra's "tweets" I have read, it does not appear like they were on "good terms" ... Of course, Sierra is not here to give "her side of the story" ...

However, Marlene is here to give "her side of the story" and she clearly did so in her "Mother's Day Statement" ...

JMO, but it was NOT what I expected from a mother whose daughter is missing ...

- No where in the letter does she address the fact that Sierra is "missing" ...

- No where in the letter does she say she is "praying" and "pleading" for her safe return ...

- This letter contains some disparaging type remarks :

Example : "A child develops ideas of their own. Sometimes a mom might disagree because of personal experiences and wisdom."

JMO, but this is "telling" ... so was there a "disagreement" ? I think so ...

JMO and MOO ...



from the Morgan Hill Times

Marlene LaMar, the mother of missing teen Sierra LaMar, released a statement today about the joys of being mother.

It reads:

“Mother’s Day is a time of reflection on what being a mom has brought to your life. Being a mom has been the greatest joy of my life. From the moment knew that a little life was growing inside me, there was an overwhelming need to protect and nurture my child. It’s not always an easy job. A child develops ideas of their own. Sometimes a mom might disagree because of personal experiences and wisdom. We hover, discipline and teach them to be responsible. We do these things because of our unconditional love for our children! I hope as mothers, we guide them to make good choices. Sierra is my miracle baby. I was told that because of my age, the likelihood of getting pregnant was slim. I knew she was going to be strong-willed the moment the doctor saw on the ultrasound that she was doing somersaults in utero.

“Regardless of the work it takes to raise children, the overwhelming love far outweighs those moments that you wonder how you’ll even make it through.

“The greatest gift that God has blessed me with is the joy of being a mom to two beautiful daughters. I love you Danielle and Sierra and I’m so proud to be you mom.”

The letter sounds like Marleen is acknowledging that Sierra was a spirited young lady, since by now Marleen knows the public is aware of Sierra's Tumblir page and Twitter account. Best to address she was aware of her daughter's rebelliousness, than to paint her ala Nancy Grace as "the all-American cheerleader."

 

[houndstooth]

My son, who is now 19, always forgot his lunch money when he went to school. He took his book bag everywhere he went, even when it wasn't school. Many times I put it in his book bag on my own accord, and sometimes it was in his room. He was a great student, so it wasn't a big deal to either one of us. I don't see how it's controlling at all...no money, no eat. Kids have other things on their minds....jmo.

There is a difference in a backpack and a wallet or purse.
It still does not explain to me why all you people just don't hand money to these kids and let them put it where ever.

How are people supposed to learn responsibility if they are not trusted with any in the first place?

That's my last on the subject.

 

[houndstooth]

The letter sounds like Marleen is acknowledging that Sierra was a spirited young lady, since by now Marleen knows the public is aware of Sierra's Tumblir page and Twitter account. Best to address she was aware of her daughter's rebelliousness, than to paint her ala Nancy Grace as "the all-American cheerleader."

Time and place for everything.

A Mother's Day letter probably wasn't the best place to address those
"issues".

 

[bgmiller5]

:seeya:

BBM: Respectfully, I disagree ...

JMO, but from Sierra's "tweets" I have read, it does not appear like they were on "good terms" ... Of course, Sierra is not here to give "her side of the story" ...

However, Marlene is here to give "her side of the story" and she clearly did so in her "Mother's Day Statement" ...

JMO, but it was NOT what I expected from a mother whose daughter is missing ...

- No where in the letter does she address the fact that Sierra is "missing" ...

- No where in the letter does she say she is "praying" and "pleading" for her safe return ...

- This letter contains some disparaging type remarks :

Example : "A child develops ideas of their own. Sometimes a mom might disagree because of personal experiences and wisdom."

JMO, but this is "telling" ... so was there a "disagreement" ? I think so ...

JMO and MOO ...



from the Morgan Hill Times

Marlene LaMar, the mother of missing teen Sierra LaMar, released a statement today about the joys of being mother.

It reads:

“Mother’s Day is a time of reflection on what being a mom has brought to your life. Being a mom has been the greatest joy of my life. From the moment knew that a little life was growing inside me, there was an overwhelming need to protect and nurture my child. It’s not always an easy job. A child develops ideas of their own. Sometimes a mom might disagree because of personal experiences and wisdom. We hover, discipline and teach them to be responsible. We do these things because of our unconditional love for our children! I hope as mothers, we guide them to make good choices. Sierra is my miracle baby. I was told that because of my age, the likelihood of getting pregnant was slim. I knew she was going to be strong-willed the moment the doctor saw on the ultrasound that she was doing somersaults in utero.

“Regardless of the work it takes to raise children, the overwhelming love far outweighs those moments that you wonder how you’ll even make it through.

“The greatest gift that God has blessed me with is the joy of being a mom to two beautiful daughters. I love you Danielle and Sierra and I’m so proud to be you mom.”

So very true. Can't imaging saying the things about either of my parents at that age, no matter how mad I got at them. Never would air it in public, especially. As far as Sierra was concerned, they didn't appear to be on good terms.

The letter sounds more combative to me. Someone isn't saying something they know...I personally think that 100%. Not saying anyone's guilty of more than that, but why the mom wouldn't be forthcoming is sketchy in my eyes.

 

[Annie1004]

Annie,
You are the second poster to mention being an adult having mom slip money into her purse.
There is a different dynamic at work in those cases.
It may be your mom and hers would not want to offend you by offering you a hand out thinking you might refuse it.
Or there are pride issues.
Or there is the aspect of a secret gift.

None of which applies when discussing lunch money of a 15 year old going to school.

True, but my first sentence stated maybe Sierra didn't eat in the cafeteria every day. I would have flipped out if my mom even touched my purse at 15. Sierra lived with her father for about a year, and Marleen may be controlling and unaccustomed to the teen-age mind when Sierra moved in with her. I didn't take it as meaning much in the case.

 

[LittleMissContrary]

:seeya:

BBM: Respectfully, I disagree ...

JMO, but from Sierra's "tweets" I have read, it does not appear like they were on "good terms" ... Of course, Sierra is not here to give "her side of the story" ...

However, Marlene is here to give "her side of the story" and she clearly did so in her "Mother's Day Statement" ...

JMO, but it was NOT what I expected from a mother whose daughter is missing ...

- No where in the letter does she address the fact that Sierra is "missing" ...

- No where in the letter does she say she is "praying" and "pleading" for her safe return ...

- This letter contains some disparaging type remarks :

Example : "A child develops ideas of their own. Sometimes a mom might disagree because of personal experiences and wisdom."

JMO, but this is "telling" ... so was there a "disagreement" ? I think so ...

JMO and MOO ...



from the Morgan Hill Times

Marlene LaMar, the mother of missing teen Sierra LaMar, released a statement today about the joys of being mother.

It reads:

“Mother’s Day is a time of reflection on what being a mom has brought to your life. Being a mom has been the greatest joy of my life. From the moment knew that a little life was growing inside me, there was an overwhelming need to protect and nurture my child. It’s not always an easy job. A child develops ideas of their own. Sometimes a mom might disagree because of personal experiences and wisdom. We hover, discipline and teach them to be responsible. We do these things because of our unconditional love for our children! I hope as mothers, we guide them to make good choices. Sierra is my miracle baby. I was told that because of my age, the likelihood of getting pregnant was slim. I knew she was going to be strong-willed the moment the doctor saw on the ultrasound that she was doing somersaults in utero.

“Regardless of the work it takes to raise children, the overwhelming love far outweighs those moments that you wonder how you’ll even make it through.

“The greatest gift that God has blessed me with is the joy of being a mom to two beautiful daughters. I love you Danielle and Sierra and I’m so proud to be you mom.”

Yes, I can understand where you may have a difference of opinion.
I was raised in a family with divorced parents. Often times the parent that is the regular caretaker, is the one who has to "lay down the law". This usually results in a somewhat rocky relationship with the child until the child becomes an adult and realizes that all those rules and restrictions were done out of love. The other parent, usually feeling at least a small amount of guilt (which is not to say they should feel guilty, but just that often they do), allows the child to have much more freedom.
Her comments directed towards her mom do not seem to be anything out of the range of normal. Especially considering that her mom moved her from Fremont, and she was clearly unhappy with that move.

As far as Marlene's letter to Sierra is concerned, I think it is hard to make any determination about her state of mind without knowing everything she knows. Parents of abducted children are often coached and guided during the period of disappearance when making pubic statements of this kind. Depending on how they profile the perp, they may think that an emotional outpouring and display may only feed into the pleasure the perp could be getting from watching the parents in misery. They may have told her to play it cool in hopes of not further exciting the perp, or perhaps to achieve a particular outcome.

 

[bgmiller5]

Time and place for everything.

A Mother's Day letter probably wasn't the best place to address those
"issues".

Disagree. If you're writing a public letter, and the only reason the public is reading it is because your daughter is missing, you should be saying something about it. jmo.

 

[OldSteve]

Seems we are going bit OT into a discussion about do's and don't of placing money in our kids purses/wallets ...
okay, I'll admit, it is more interesting than me going on about the cats at the shed...:floorlaugh:

 

[wasalurker]

Every day until they graduated?

Or are we talking little kids?

No, we are talking HS kids....every day till they graduated. When they were smaller they had an acct at school that the parents refilled and the kids used - they never had to carry money. In HS they had to have $$ and mine continually forgot it, then I would have to run out and go to school and drop off $$ for them. Easier, quicker, etc to just stuff a few dollars in their hoodie pocket or their backpack.

 

[houndstooth]

True, but my first sentence stated maybe Sierra didn't eat in the cafeteria every day. I would have flipped out if my mom even touched my purse at 15. Sierra lived with her father for about a year, and Marleen may be controlling and unaccustomed to the teen-age mind when Sierra moved in with her. I didn't take it as meaning much in the case.

Thank you for the clarification because I really didn't get all that from your original post.

 

[Annie1004]

Time and place for everything.

A Mother's Day letter probably wasn't the best place to address those
"issues".

Marleen made it clear that she loved both her daughters in her message. Besides, Marc Klaas suggested she write it.

No matter what a family does in a high profile case, they are going to be under a microscope, damned if they do, and damned if they don't.

 

[dog.gone.cute]

The letter sounds like Marleen is acknowledging that Sierra was a spirited young lady, since by now Marleen knows the public is aware of Sierra's Tumblir page and Twitter account. Best to address she was aware of her daughter's rebelliousness, than to paint her ala Nancy Grace as "the all-American cheerleader."

:seeya:

JMO, but I think Marlene was well aware of the "content" of Seirra's Twitter account ... and I think she was aware of some other things, which of course, we may -- or may never -- know the "truth" about ...

If your daughter is "rebellious", than just say so ... There is no need for Marlene to "dance around" the issue and paint a picture of something that may "not" be accurate ...

BBM: LOL ... Yes, Nancy does go "over board" sometimes ...

:moo:

 

[bgmiller5]

There is a difference in a backpack and a wallet or purse.
It still does not explain to me why all you people just don't hand money to these kids and let them put it where ever.

How are people supposed to learn responsibility if they are not trusted with any in the first place?

That's my last on the subject.

Don't see a correlation between how a kid receives her lunch money with being or not being responsible. My kid was earning his own lunch money his senior year, so, apparently something took.

 

[OldSteve]

dog.gone.cute - I agree with your observations about the letter in that it shows IMO that all was not smooth sailing ... often in letters of this kind you see a person express things they believe are supposed to be said, and then you see the reality of what's really taking place...