Connecticut school district on lockdown after shooting report at a Newtown elemen #11

[FragileSugar]

Snipped respectfully by me.
My opinion is that it is very likely that NL sought counseling and treatment of some kind for her son. As a person of means and education, I believe it would have been the course she would have naturally taken, in an effort to help if mot cure her increasingly troubled child.

No doubt LE does know the who, what, where etc. of mental health and service providers that have had any contact with AL. It would be uncovered in the investigation into the family's lives. Yes, I agree that victims deserve to know about this kind of info to help them try to make sense of a senseless tragedy. Perhaps we as the public need that info too to educate society as a whole about this hidden area.

AND I cannot imagine the distress of any mental health professional who ever was involved with AL. How difficult it must be to examine yourself, your skills, your instincts in the aftermath, with the ever-present question 'what more could I have done'? AND how fearful it would be to consider the public's scrutiny and, in some cases, rage about you if they knew your name.

The State of Connecticut laws regarding mental health professionals state that the provider is PERMITTED to disclose confidential patient information if in their profession judgement, and in good faith, they believe their is an imminent risk of personal injury to the patient or others. Some states have laws that make it a MANDATORY duty to warn, or duty to protect. All states have the mandatory provision for child abuse. New York just changed their mental health duty to warn law to MANDATORY in January, perhaps as a result of the recent mass shootings. at the link below there a state by state rundown, with details. I did a search of this thread and didn't see it mentioned, though I admit I did not search all 10 threads before this one #11. If it is a repeat, I apologize.

http://www.ncsl.org/issues-research/health/mental-health-professionals-duty-to-warn.aspx

Thanks for the info Coco! I do believe that NL had sought treatment for AL in the past. There were reports that NL did seek counseling for AL. For instance she was advised to stay in Newtown rather than move at one point - but I know I read in one article that someone (was it LaFontaine?) said she didn't agree with what the experts/counselors were telling her. There were also reports that AL was on medication. Nothing confirmed though. If he was on some sort of meds for his behavior problems, he would have required follow up visits with his psychiatrist I believe.

I just can't imagine any expert advising NL to pull AL out of school as many times as she did. I wonder if she didn't heed all of the advice she was given. I'm just wondering if she continued seeking treatment for him as he got older. My son has moderate Asperger's and he has private counseling twice a week. Thankfully he doesn't require an IEP but the schools he has been in have been very accommodating when a problem does arise. Since it seems like no one had any real contact with NL or AL since 2010 it's hard to figure out if NL continued services for AL once he was finished with high school.

 

[HastingsChi]

There isn't an ounce of credible evidence that Adam Lanza's hero was Anders Breivik.

From NBC: Police: 'Mere speculation' that Adam Lanza was motivated by obsession with other mass killers

"Reports that Sandy Hook school shooter Adam Lanza aspired to one-up Norwegian mass killer Anders Breivik are “mere speculation” given the ongoing nature of the investigation, said Connecticut State Police spokesman Lt. Paul Vance."

and

"CBS News has appended an editor’s note to the online version of its story saying that after the piece ran Vance “told CBS News that the investigation into the motive for the Newtown shooting has not been completed and therefore any statements about the shooter’s intent are mere speculation.”"

Wow, I'm shocked....

Well, actually, as soon as the report aired I immediately posted here that law enforcement denied the story and it was pure malarkey.

From the beginning the media has a near perfect record when it comes to "reporting" information about the Lanza family; starting when they made Nancy a Sandy Hook kindergarten teacher and identified the shooter as Ryan (complete with 10+ photos of Ryan broadcast to the world) and this inaccurate reporting about the Lanza's continues today.

The exception is the Frontline doc which presented actual facts from people who actually knew Nancy Lanza and the shooter. Frontline didn't make outrageous claims or report rumor or speculation, they vetted and fact checked carefully and presented what they could verify as being true.

With a few exceptions, one of the only things about the Lanza's other media has reported that has been accurate is the spelling of their name.

 

[4MYGUYS]

Thanks for the link. Very interesting article. I'm surprised he says that NL didn't talk about her divorce and was surprised when she got one. From the 1999 emails it seems as if she confided quite a bit.

When was the last time you actually saw her?

Three years ago. We had dinner some place. She’d come up to visit and she’d tell me ahead of time when she was coming to visit. …

Three years ago = 2010. I wonder if she kept in touch via email correspondence. If not, then it is yet another relationship that was suddenly cut off. 2010. I wonder what happened in NL and AL's world that year.

His 18th birthday may have been the turning point. At 18 & of legal age, I lean towards AL cutting off all communication with his father, and beginning to exert more control over his own life with NL. 2 more years pass and NL possibly is in the process of legally regaining control over a very ill person.
Reading her emails, she also was very concerned about her health issues, and death. We will probably never learn how valid her concerns were, or if this was a recurring theme, (I'm sick and could die any minute ) she also played out with AL.
I don't find the emails flattering and wonder who released them.

 

[time]

His 18th birthday may have been the turning point. At 18 & of legal age, I lean towards AL cutting off all communication with his father, and beginning to exert more control over his own life with NL. 2 more years pass and NL possibly is in the process of legally regaining control over a very ill person.
Reading her emails, she also was very concerned about her health issues, and death. We will probably never learn how valid her concerns were, or if this was a recurring theme, (I'm sick and could die any minute ) she also played out with AL.
I don't find the emails flattering and wonder who released them.

I think Mr. LaFontaine released the emails. Oddly, he must have thought they were flattering?

 

[4MYGUYS]

I think Mr. LaFontaine released the emails. Oddly, he must have thought they were flattering?

:wormsr Not... I was constantly wondering what LaFontaine was saying too. One sided convos,,, so difficult to fully understand. And WHY release these emails..... for his reputation now?

 

[CocoChanel]

Thanks for the info Coco! I do believe that NL had sought treatment for AL in the past. There were reports that NL did seek counseling for AL. For instance she was advised to stay in Newtown rather than move at one point - but I know I read in one article that someone (was it LaFontaine?) said she didn't agree with what the experts/counselors were telling her. There were also reports that AL was on medication. Nothing confirmed though. If he was on some sort of meds for his behavior problems, he would have required follow up visits with his psychiatrist I believe.

I just can't imagine any expert advising NL to pull AL out of school as many times as she did. I wonder if she didn't heed all of the advice she was given. I'm just wondering if she continued seeking treatment for him as he got older. My son has moderate Asperger's and he has private counseling twice a week. Thankfully he doesn't require an IEP but the schools he has been in have been very accommodating when a problem does arise. Since it seems like no one had any real contact with NL or AL since 2010 it's hard to figure out if NL continued services for AL once he was finished with high school.

You are very wise indeed to see to it that your son with Asperger's has counseling twice a week. I know you mentioned a military connection that makes it feasible, and that is so wonderful. That is exactly the kind of benefit that I personally want military families to have access to. I wish your son the best, and I applaud you as his mother for being dedicated to supporting his emotional well-being.

As critical as therapy is, it is a national shame that it is not easily available to all who would benefit. I work with adults on the autism spectrum, and though I am not a counselor, I find myself in counseling situations with them often as they navigate the complex social world of society. Some of my friends with Asperger's never realized there were others who had the same challenges. It is an isolating syndrome, that CAN lead to depression and anxiety and other mental health issues. I think AL's retreat into a solitary basement world could have been the result of never knowing there ARE others out here with similar challenges who have managed to find success and happiness in life in a 'strange land'. I use that term because I often imagine living on the autism spectrum must feel like being a stranger in a strange land.

 

[time]

:wormsr Not... I was constantly wondering what LaFontaine was saying too. One sided convos,,, so difficult to fully understand. And WHY release these emails..... for his reputation now?

IDK... maybe the spotlight? I think it's a bit strange to release someone else's emails but not your own. But also, why 1999? What about the next 13-14 years?

 

[i.b.nora]

I think the only person who should be made privy to the email exchanges (if LaFontaine so chooses) is her living son, Ryan.

Otherwise they just become fodder for the detractors.

I found the ones he did release very interesting but am unable to draw any conclusions from them.

 

[jjenny]

I think with AL's difficulties the choice of a degree was a somewhat different process than usual and the possibility of making a productive career out of it probably wasn't such a great factor if it was becoming evident that he wasn't going to make a productive career out of anything. Then it would be more a matter of what he was interested in and what he might be persuaded to get out of the house for.

I've never studied history but a friend did and from what I understand you can do a lot of the studying just reading books and writing essays in solitude and it may require less personal interaction than some other fields of study.

Well, we haven't heard anything about AL being interested in History. Anyhow, PBS claims they couldn't find a school in which AL was supposed to study, so how do they know he was going to study History?

 

[Donjeta]

Well, we haven't heard anything about AL being interested in History. Anyhow, PBS claims they couldn't find a school in which AL was supposed to study, so how do they know he was going to study History?

I've no idea what their source is but he did pretty well in the history classes he took at age 16 at the Western Connecticut State University so I don't see it as bizarre to think history might have been something they thought he could do. But no doubt it could be just one of those things that the media got wrong in this case.

The gunman in the Connecticut elementary school slaughter was a college student at the age 16, earning A's in computer science and American history classes.

Read more: http://www.nydailynews.com/news/nat...ge-classes-16-article-1.1221831#ixzz2LqevHHtG

This is just my conjecture but I think he might have been interested in the history of wars and the military. It has been reported that he was fascinated with the military and had posters of historical weapons on his walls and played war games obsessively and an interest in military history would not surprise me in that context.

 

[Darkman00]

Someone did provide information to media however .... that they found many articles in one of bedrooms at Lanza's property ... about the mass killer from Norway.

So unless that was a pure lie (which I am always skeptical one way or another anyhow).. - maybe he liked that Norway's dude .... who knows.

Much attention should not be paid however if copycat of Norway's dude was a main reason for AL's actions or not...

It's simply side detail now .... damage is done .. and he / AL is dead......
So what was in his head .. - with 100% certainty no one will ever know anyhow..

More attention should be paid however to people with psychological problems / psyhological illnesses .. that more likely could be found EVERYWHERE among us. (if look for them hard enough).

 

[FragileSugar]

You are very wise indeed to see to it that your son with Asperger's has counseling twice a week. I know you mentioned a military connection that makes it feasible, and that is so wonderful. That is exactly the kind of benefit that I personally want military families to have access to. I wish your son the best, and I applaud you as his mother for being dedicated to supporting his emotional well-being.

As critical as therapy is, it is a national shame that it is not easily available to all who would benefit. I work with adults on the autism spectrum, and though I am not a counselor, I find myself in counseling situations with them often as they navigate the complex social world of society. Some of my friends with Asperger's never realized there were others who had the same challenges. It is an isolating syndrome, that CAN lead to depression and anxiety and other mental health issues. I think AL's retreat into a solitary basement world could have been the result of never knowing there ARE others out here with similar challenges who have managed to find success and happiness in life in a 'strange land'. I use that term because I often imagine living on the autism spectrum must feel like being a stranger in a strange land.

BBM - I agree with you Coco and thank you so much for the kind words. If it wasn't for Tricare there is no way we could afford counseling. According to the insurance statment, one 45 minute session equals $200! I also realized I said my son goes twice a week but it's twice a month! :blushing: He does look forward to it and I think having that "neutral" person to talk to helps him a lot.

When I read these reports of how many children are diagnosed with an ASD nowadays (1 in 88 now I think), I wonder how many families are able to see to it that their children receive services. It breaks my heart that there are many that do not have the option. That's why I wonder what services AL received. NL was very well off financially and as a result she probably had so many more options available for AL.

 

[FragileSugar]

IDK... maybe the spotlight? I think it's a bit strange to release someone else's emails but not your own. But also, why 1999? What about the next 13-14 years?

My thoughts exactly! If they were corresponding for years, why did he just give access to 1999? Why not 2000-2013? Why not include any emails where NL may have discussed how she dealt with AL? Emails that would give a better understanding as to the dynamic between NL and AL? Emails that would have portrayed NL in a more positive light.

Instead we get a portrait of a very off-the-wall character. Spreading gossip at a wedding, her Y2K fears while she brags about $3k/night hotels, random discussions about her garden and the pervy gardener...

I wonder if LaFontaine excluded any emails after 1999 because of what his emails to her might reveal about him. We know he was experiencing marital problems. Does anyone know offhand when LaFontaine and his wife divorced? Maybe he and NL were "friends with benefits"?

Very odd all around considering he might be one of the few people that might actually have some sort of insight to the NL/AL relationship.

 

[time]

Uhm, it appears Mr. LaFontaine got divorced the very end of 2009 or very beginning of 2010 per his meetup profile.

 

[i.b.nora]

The March issue of The New Yorker has an article about the esteemed local newsletter, The Newtown Bee. Unfortunately, unless you are a subscriber, it appears you cannot read the whole article.

Here: http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2013/03/04/130304fa_fact_aviv?currentPage=all

LETTER FROM NEWTOWN
LOCAL STORY
A community newspaper covers a national tragedy.
BY RACHEL AVIV
MARCH 4, 2013

"LETTER FROM NEWTOWN about how the Newtown Bee covered the Sandy Hook Elementary School massacre. When Shannon Hicks, a reporter and photographer for the Newtown Bee, pulled into the Sandy Hook Elementary School’s parking lot, Newtown police officers had already entered the school. She saw a young officer, William Chapman, come out of the school yelling, “Get a bus!” He had a limp girl in his arms. A few minutes later, officers began to lead the first class of children out of the school. With their eyes clenched shut, the children appeared trusting. Hicks’s photograph of the class has become the iconic picture of the tragedy. Hicks has been at the Bee since 1985, when she was sixteen."

Much more before you have to click over to the rest of the story (which you have to be a subscriber to read)...

Read more: http://www.newyorker.com/reporting/2013/03/04/130304fa_fact_aviv#ixzz2LvtikDX1

 

[FragileSugar]

Sandy Hook Elementary's fate rests with 28 Newtown officials

Llodra, the school board and Superintendent of Schools Janet Robinson all have said that no solution is likely to come fast enough to have a new school in place in Newtown by September. Sandy Hook School is likely to remain in the Monroe building at least through the end of the next school year.

“We’re anxious to have them back, but we also know that the process is going to take awhile in order to do it right,” school board Chairwoman Debbie Leidlein said Friday. “We’re weighing everybody’s input so we can make the best decisions possible.”

 

[FragileSugar]

Parents of Sandy Hook victim speak of shattering journey, personal crusade

The distorted facts swirling across the community in the wake of the shootings contributed to Mark Barden’s lack of preparedness for what was to come. Daniel was alive, he thought, but the ordeal would be hard for him to handle. That’s as far as Mark’s thought process would take him.

“I was still thinking about formulating how I was going to talk to Daniel about this,” he said.

...

Jackie, an elementary schoolteacher, was at work that morning in Pawling, N.Y. She got three text messages that morning about her children’s schools being locked down...

She was advised not to drive the 34 miles from her job to Newtown, Conn. A co-worker took her there. She walked into the fire station conference room where her husband and other parents of victims had been waiting.

“I’m not sure how I can announce this,” said Col. Danny R. Stebbins of the Connecticut State Police.

By that time, Mark’s emotions were catching up to him.

“Twenty children are dead,” Stebbins continued.

Mark buried his head into his neighbor’s shoulder.

Jackie’s knees buckled.

Neither recalls much more about those moments or the hours that followed, but they both remember at one point being on the floor sobbing.
...

On the way to the bus stop, Daniel tried to goad his dad into a game of tag because that’s what he loved to do each morning before school. On this particular day, Mark told Daniel, “We always play tag. How about this time we just hold hands?”

On Daniel’s last day, he got to walk down the sidewalk and up the street that morning hand-in-hand with his father.

Mark can recite every minute of it.

lease:lease:

 

[HastingsChi]

FragileSugar thank you for sharing that article about the Barden family's journey (in every sense) after the death of their son Daniel in the Sandy Hook massacre.

It is one of the most comprehensive, completing and thoughtful articles I've read. The reporter, Tony Holt, is very talented and writes for The Daytona Beach News Journal

 

[i.b.nora]

Posted: 11:34 a.m. Monday, Feb. 25, 2013
Facebook agrees to remove some Newtown pages
KTVU and AP Wires

"Facebook has agreed to remove some so-called tribute pages related to the Sandy Hook Elementary School shooting over concerns they're being used to exploit the tragedy, U.S. Sen. Richard Blumenthal said Monday."

Echoing complaints already brought by some Sandy Hook families, Blumenthal and fellow Connecticut Democrats U.S. Sen. Chris Murphy and U.S. Rep. Elizabeth Esty requested the removal of offending pages in a letter to Facebook chief executive Mark Zuckerberg Monday morning."

Much more...

http://www.ktvu.com/news/news/facebook-agrees-remove-some-newtown-pages/nWY9H/

 

[FragileSugar]

Connecticut mulls death certificate limits after Newtown massacre


Town Clerk Debbie Aurelia said she's concerned certain details on the documents, such as a mother's maiden name or a cemetery name, could be misused by identity thieves or used by the media and others to contact family members during their time of grief.

"They want to know where the victims are buried and how they died," she told members of the General Assembly's Government Administration and Elections Committee on Friday. "This is an extreme invasion of privacy."

Aurelia said she knows of families who have been threatened and intimidated since the Dec. 14 massacre, which left 20 first graders and six educators at Sandy Hook Elementary School dead. But Aurelia told The Associated Press that her office has not yet released any requested death certificates.