Tatum was probably very nice to Relisha but also to her too.
Yes, every time thoughts come into my head about more innocent possibilities I get mad at the thought that any of them deserve any credit at all. But, although I cannot understand the situation as a whole, I can understand pieces of it, if I try to forget what we know now.
Here is what I am saying- prior to this big bad event, there was some nice interaction. Those of us who are observant and aware know that "grooming" is nice and kind and is designed to win trust and admiration. And it went on for quite a while! 18 months is a long time.
I am an only parent. I try to put myself in the situation where an older couple (not only a man!- it was him and his wife!) are around a lot with their children (who seem quite normal) and grandchildren. They have a child my son's age and they have played for over a year! I would probably have no problem letting him go places with them and their grandchild. They have earned trust and been around a long time!! It was reported he dressed nice, was kind to everyone and I will bet no one knew about his criminal past. He was employed by a state run (?) homeless shelter, after all!
As for him handing out money and gifts, I also can see where this wouldn't necessarily raise red flags (until later when something bad happened). I was the Associate Director of a mental health agency for 16 years. I had an older lady who worked as a staff member for us for many years. Her husband worked and made lots of money. She drove a Lexus and came to work every day for $7 an hour, with the favorite snack of each person (a pickle, a bag of pretzels, a pouch of Kool-Aid, etc) every day! It was not sinister! She worked for the love and joy she could give! I LOVED that staff member and think of her and her kindness often! Our individuals LIVED in our homes. They were part of our families. Many did not have family and my staff were all they had. They would go to holiday dinners with them and parties and were so happy to be included and loved. It touched my heart that these people who we provided services for were accepted and loved, some for the first time in their lives! I would not change that or the smiles and genuine joy both my staff and my people we served experienced. And we never had a bad experience with it. I wanted my "clients" to feel like they were worth more than only people who were paid to tolerate them.
It is much easier now that something bad has happened to say "I would never" or something the same. But, you might have. I might have. NO! I am not saying I would have not checked on him after 3 weeks. I would have checked on him after 3 hours! But, some of it, I can see how it evolved.
Please, don't start with the "but she didn't... well, he... her lies say...". I know. I get it. I have followed this case and know all those points very well. They are both horrible and never deserved Relisha in their lives for one second. I am not defending the actions as a whole. I am just trying to give a real life glimpse into how SOME of those things could have happened without much alarm by others.
lease:
