Doogie Howser is Gay!

[Nova]

It is!!
And would be compared to any of your cities in the states...it is nothing compared to Sydney and Melbourne.
Sydney and Melbourne are always bickering over which one is the best city...the others aren't even in the running lol

Muriel's Wedding was in part filmed right near where I live!
It's been a while since I saw that movie, it was the movie that started Toni Collette's career.
My ex hubby is in Mental Health and used to treat the brother, he was a bit not there..(the story was based on a local politicians family, I forget the name...the whole family were a bit odd!)

Wow, Narla, thanks! I didn't know it was based on an actual family. We still grab anyone who hasn't seen it and make them watch - even though some (like my sister) don't understand why we think it is hysterically funny (as well as tragic).

We also go to see pretty much everything Toni Collette or Rachel Griffiths does.

Too bad about P.J. Hogan (the writer/director). Working in Hollywood hasn't been kind to his work, IMHO.

 

[Nova]

Actually, I think we've been having an excellent conversation, one that I've truly enjoyed.

We've all been good about discussing things lately without it getting out of hand, and I love that. I'd hate to see this thread get locked.

I would, too. This is a discussion forum. Dark Knight was asked his Church's view on homosexuality and explained it clearly and succinctly. To my mind, this is what a "discussion" is.

(The question of what is offensive speech came up recently on another thread with a similar topic. I think context is important: while it would be both rude and offensive for someone to barge into my house and compare me to a pedophile (however obliquely), here we ask and expect posters to express opinions that may not be to everyone's liking. Prohibiting them from doing so will leave us with nothing to discuss but Tomkat's Baby; I, for one, am done with that subject.)

 

[Nova]

When my husband started teaching at the local state university, he had to provide a copy of our marriage certificate before they would include me on his health insurance. So obviously the California State University system does not include domestic partners as part of the health insurance plan.

Pepper, I believe it does. Your husband could have produced a copy of his Domestic Partner registration form (if he had one) instead of the marriage license. However, the unfair tax burden I mentioned above would then apply.

 

[Nova]

I don't live in California, but that kind of surprises me because I thought they did have some sort of law for domestic partnership.

Julianne, we do. Although it isn't perfect, California's dp law is much closer to marriage than most states. My partner and I would have to go to divorce court to split up at this point.

 

[JBean]

Julianne, we do. Although it isn't perfect, California's dp law is much closer to marriage than most states. My partner and I would have to go to divorce court to split up at this point.

One of the biggest issues I have seen is rights in the event of death.
There was a local disc jockey couple on KFI a few years back. Karel and Andrew. Andrew dies suddenly and unexpectedly and Karel had no rights to get medical information about his death or make decisions regarding his final resting place etc. IIRC, he was unable to sue the hospital or doctor for the alleged malpractice that resulted in Andrew's death. They were my rush hour dj's and the whole thing was absolutely heartbreaking. talk about adding insult to injury.
He became even more outspoken on this topic.

 

[Nova]

One of the biggest issues I have seen is rights in the event of death.

I remember Karel and Andrew well, JBean. (KFI's signal stops about where the North side of Palm Springs begins, so I don't know who's on now.) That was indeed heartbreaking.

I believe the situation would be different now, but I don't hope to test it any time soon. (One of the interesting aspects of this whole issue is that dp laws do not just benefit homosexuals. Under current California law, my step-children (partner's biologicals) would be recognized as my relatives were I in a hospital and could not be denied access to me.)

Since Catholicism was much discussed above, I should point out that the one time my partner and I were faced with such a situation (partner had a severe concussion and was unable to understand medical instructions or make decisions for himself), our local, Catholic hospital treated me as precisely his spouse. And that was 20 years ago! Most of the Catholics I know try very hard to "love the sinner," and leave the judgment to God.

 

[JBean]

I remember Karel and Andrew well, JBean. (KFI's signal stops about where the North side of Palm Springs begins, so I don't know who's on now.) That was indeed heartbreaking.

I believe the situation would be different now, but I don't hope to test it any time soon. (One of the interesting aspects of this whole issue is that dp laws do not just benefit homosexuals. Under current California law, my step-children (partner's biologicals) would be recognized as my relatives were I in a hospital and could not be denied access to me.)

Since Catholicism was much discussed above, I should point out that the one time my partner and I were faced with such a situation (partner had a severe concussion and was unable to understand medical instructions or make decisions for himself), our local, Catholic hospital treated me as precisely his spouse. And that was 20 years ago! Most of the Catholics I know try very hard to "love the sinner," and leave the judgment to God.

Oh gosh, I didn't even think about the Catholic hospital aspect. Our local trauma hospital is Catholic. I am glad that you were treated properly.
Funny, my best friend was just in ICU, I met the ambulance at the hospital and while they knew i was not a blood relation, they kept me abreast ofwhat was happening and allowed me to stay with her in ER while they waiting for a place in ICU. She was not conscious, so there was no permission given.. I was allowed into ICU before her family. I am fairly certain they assumed we were a gay couple, and were trying to make sure I had all the current information and diagnosis. heehhee. So, it's already working to my advantage.

 

[Ang50]

One of the biggest issues I have seen is rights in the event of death.
There was a local disc jockey couple on KFI a few years back. Karel and Andrew. Andrew dies suddenly and unexpectedly and Karel had no rights to get medical information about his death or make decisions regarding his final resting place etc. IIRC, he was unable to sue the hospital or doctor for the alleged malpractice that resulted in Andrew's death. They were my rush hour dj's and the whole thing was absolutely heartbreaking. talk about adding insult to injury.
He became even more outspoken on this topic.

In some states, these sorts of situations can be handled by having Power of Attorney for Health Care and POA for Finances. (Health would have handled the first part, and the Finances would have handled the lawsuits.) Hetero couples should have these too. Most heteros don't, though, so either a hospital just allows the spouse to handle these things, or the spouse can go to court and get these rights.

For gay couples, this wouldn't happen unless there are legal forms in place. It's really unfortunate, and requires gay couples to take a bunch of extra steps and involve lawyers and pay lots of $$. There is no question - that is discrimination b/c of the sex of your partner - everything else is the same. That's what makes this wrong.

WI's constitutional amendment to define Marriage as one man one woman and not to recognize other state's civil unions, etc. passed. My husband said he now feels like he lives in a "red-neck" state because it puts discrimination on the books. (This from a Maxim-reading, truck-driving, deer-hunting football and wrestling coach - gotta love him!)

As a consolation, there is a pretty viable theory that this amendment, and the death penalty advisory referendum drew out a lot of new voters, who overwhelmingly voted Democrat. (While they also voted to kill people and discriminate... but at least it's something)

 

[Nova]

So, it's already working to my advantage.

And to the advantage of others. A friends of mine had a hysterectomy a few years ago. Because her family are nuts, she says, she asked me to serve as next of kin. Of course, she signed a directive, but the hospital personnel didn't bat an eye about giving me info or letting me make decisions.

(They DID bat an eye when right before surgery she asked them to check for STDs because she had had unprotected sex with an acquaintance. I was so shocked (that she had been so stupid) I said very loudly, "You did what?!" The medical team just stood there, looking very uncomfortable. Later I realized they must have thought I was her boyfriend and hearing the "upsetting news" that she had "cheated" for the first time. )

 

[Nova]

Great post, Ang. And good advice. Thanks.

We aren't allowed to fire guns here, so an imaginary 21-gun salute to your husband and his good sense. (And go, Badgers! (My partner is a UW-Madison grad.))

 

[JBean]

And to the advantage of others. A friends of mine had a hysterectomy a few years ago. Because her family are nuts, she says, she asked me to serve as next of kin. Of course, she signed a directive, but the hospital personnel didn't bat an eye about giving me info or letting me make decisions.

(They DID bat an eye when right before surgery she asked them to check for STDs because she had had unprotected sex with an acquaintance. I was so shocked (that she had been so stupid) I said very loudly, "You did what?!" The medical team just stood there, looking very uncomfortable. Later I realized they must have thought I was her boyfriend and hearing the "upsetting news" that she had "cheated" for the first time. )

OMG that is so funny.
heehee

 

[JBean]

Great post, Ang. And good advice. Thanks.

We aren't allowed to fire guns here, so an imaginary 21-gun salute to your husband and his good sense. (And go, Badgers! (My partner is a UW-Madison grad.))

My dad went to medical school there and served his residency.

Good advice Ang50.

 

[julianne]

And to the advantage of others. A friends of mine had a hysterectomy a few years ago. Because her family are nuts, she says, she asked me to serve as next of kin. Of course, she signed a directive, but the hospital personnel didn't bat an eye about giving me info or letting me make decisions.

I worked in a hospital for many years. Used to be, we freely gave info out. Now with HIPPA (sp?) things have changed so much. Case in point--There was a physical assault that happened and the perpetrator ended up getting stabbed in the arm, pretty badly. After the perp stabbed the victim, the victim wrestled the knife from the perp and stabbed him before perp got away. LE showed up at the Emergency Dept. wanting to know if any patients fitting the perp's description were there for treatment of a large arm laceration. My boss refused to give him the info, based on the new privacy laws, which, in a legal standpoint, she really couldn't. Even though the ED and LE work hand in hand many times, as soon as these news laws went into affect, everything changed.

Fortunately, SOMEONE :innocent: alerted LE on the downlow that perp was about to be discharged, and if the officer would just wait outside, the perp would walk right in his path. He did, and was arrested without incident after victim identified him.

 

[Nova]

My dad went to medical school there and served his residency.

Good advice Ang50.

JBean, it seems you and I have spent our lives within steps of one another. If not in this life, then surely in the next we shall be great, personal friends!

 

[Ang50]

Great post, Ang. And good advice. Thanks.

We aren't allowed to fire guns here, so an imaginary 21-gun salute to your husband and his good sense. (And go, Badgers! (My partner is a UW-Madison grad.))

I'm a Badger undergrad (1998) and now at law school here at UW. Say hello to your partner for me.

I married well, but believe me, I've worked hard on my husband. We had a small taste of this when we combined our names upon marriage. I didn't want his name, he didn't want mine, but we wanted a "family name". So Wellnitz and Smith became Wellsmith. The state gov gave us no problem, but the feds didn't allow it, and we had to go through a legal name change separate from our marriage, and it cost about $300 to do it. (I did all the legal stuff, this was just filing fees, court costs, newspaper notifications, etc.) To get other Power of Attorney docs, wills, etc. all squared away would costs thousands. Plus, you'd need legal advice for home ownership, etc. This is all stuff that I don't HAVE to do b/c by default, since i'm a woman married to a man, the courts would work out. Not the same with gay couples.

 

[Nova]

I worked in a hospital for many years. Used to be, we freely gave info out. Now with HIPPA (sp?) things have changed so much.

Julianne, I had no idea things had gotten so strict. My partner works at a college and I know they have all sorts of new privacy guidelines and can't even acknowledge whether a student attends the school. But it never occurred to me these rules would apply to LE.

 

[Nova]

So Wellnitz and Smith became Wellsmith.

What a great idea! Imagine how interesting the world would be if this were more common!

 

[JBean]

JBean, it seems you and I have spent our lives within steps of one another. If not in this life, then surely in the next we shall be great, personal friends!

Well I can't wait that long...so I shall be in PS one of these days.
I am originally from Chi-town. One of my sisters went to U of W Madison also.
We had vacation home in Baraboo outside the Dells. My mom only just moved from Baraboo 2 years ago, back to Illinois.
I'll be in Chicago this weekend and I'm going to run up to Racine for some cheese.

 

[Nova]

Well I can't wait that long...so I shall be in PS one of these days.
I am originally from Chi-town. One of my sisters went to U of W Madison also.
We had vacation home in Baraboo outside the Dells. My mom only just moved from Baraboo 2 years ago, back to Illinois.
I'll be in Chicago this weekend and I'm going to run up to Racine for some cheese.

You shall be welcome, JBean. (Seriously, if you have time, let me know and I'll buy lunch or something.)

My partner grew up on a dairy farm in Belvedere, IL. (He later worked for Catholic Children's Charities in Chicago.) Ever since I met him 30 years ago, I've been hearing about the Dells. Apparently, that is the one part of the Midwest that is beautiful. Pardon me, but I'll have to see it to believe it. (I was born in Kansas, BTW, but I was clever enough to escape at the age of 7 weeks.)

 

[JBean]

You shall be welcome, JBean. (Seriously, if you have time, let me know and I'll buy lunch or something.)

My partner grew up on a dairy farm in Belvedere, IL. (He later worked for Catholic Children's Charities in Chicago.) Every since I met him 30 years ago, I've been hearing about the Dells. Apparently, that is the one part of the Midwest that is beautiful. Pardon me, but I'll have to see it to believe it. (I was born in Kansas, BTW, but I was clever enough to escape at the age of 7 weeks.)

hahaha there is no place like the Dells in the world.The Dells themselves are beautiful, but the tourist attraction Dells is hysterical! It is certainly midwest different. The North Woods of Baraboo is lovely too, Devil's Lake and pretty hillside. of course it is home to the Barnum and Bailey Circus World Museum lol!
My attraction to Wisconsin was from the age of 18. You see the drinking age over the border was 18 and it was 21 in Illinois. So every weekend, carloads of us 18 yo's would drive over the border, drink up a storm and then drive home. sheesh.Brilliant.
I know where Belvedere is and I will be coming to PS at some point and you will be the first to know.