GUILTY FL - Chance Walsh, 7 wks, North Port, 7 Oct 2015 #2

[SweatPea4.5]

I remember my son literally crying for 3 or 4 hours non-stop. (Even had some Twitter posts about it show up in my Timehop the other day.) It was rough. I had a hard time with it. So yeah...I remember thinking, "I could see how someone with little self control or with anger issues or whatever could hurt their child." Thankfully, I wasn't alone and I knew to just leave the room.

You reacted like a human being, not a monster. Quick back story...at 18, I ran off and eloped, with a guy who turned out to be a loser, btw, but anyway... I joined the military and moved across the country from my family. 14 months later (4 months after my 19th bday), I had my first baby. That was before we all had cell phones, smart phones, and computers in every house. Long distance calls were expensive. I had no one to talk to. My then-husband was useless and always gone. I worked full time in the military. I was alone, tired, broke, young, and inexperienced. I remember one night my daughter (a few months old) wouldn't stop crying, and none of the usual things were working. Everything I'd read said to put the crying baby somewhere safe like a crib, and go into another room . So I did just that when I started to feel angry. Within 2 minutes, the guilt of ignoring my baby was overwhelming, and I quickly had her back in my arms . I'm not judging any parent that does the walk-away thing - sometimes you need to. Sometimes that's the best way to deal with it. I'm just saying if a teenager, alone, inexperienced, frustrated, etc can deal with it, anyone can. These ppl are just disgusting.

 

[MsMarple]

In case anyone missed it here's the link again to the article that has the unredacted information from the arrest report, updated today at 5:06 EDT:

http://www.heraldtribune.com/article/20151021/ARTICLE/151029953?p=1&tc=pg

 

[AmyPond]

Before we left the hospital, we had to watch a video. And in that video...that's exactly what is says to do. Put the baby in a safe place like a crib and leave the room. Go outside if you have to. The baby will be fine while you cool off for a few minutes. And call someone to help if needed.

 

[Ray_of_hope]

If only... health care workers had known that Walsh had a history w/ DCF and that prior parental rights had been terminated. In the hospital, we have no info on fathers/boyfriends and unless the mom admits that she has children that aren't in her care, we have no knowledge of that either. So there is no way to track an abuser or red flags to warrant a call to DCF. Very very frustrating. We need tracking measures. Many are on their best behavior during their brief hospital stays.

 

[strawberry]

Before we left the hospital, we had to watch a video. And in that video...that's exactly what is says to do. Put the baby in a safe place like a crib and leave the room. Go outside if you have to. The baby will be fine while you cool off for a few minutes. And call someone to help if needed.

My DD is 18 now but as a newborn she cried, no lie, from 5 pm til about 2 pm every day. Nothing helped; rocking, feeding swinging. She also didn't sleep during the day. I remember more than one putting her in the middle of a double bed and just stepping out for a few minutes. Turns out she had hip dysplasia and was in pain, but still, it is challenging. But this, these monsters! If true, he beat the baby because he was mad at his wife! Beat him! He didn't get frustrated and shake the baby. I can't wrap my mind around it.

 

[ClaireNC]

I think the autopsy is going to be hideous.

I couldn't bear to repeat your list of possible damage done to this poor baby, but all are definitely possible causes for his gasping for breath. I'm having a real hard time with this one. I just can't get little Chance off of my mind.

 

[MsMarple]

My DD is 18 now but as a newborn she cried, no lie, from 5 pm til about 2 pm every day. Nothing helped; rocking, feeding swinging. She also didn't sleep during the day. I remember more than one putting her in the middle of a double bed and just stepping out for a few minutes. Turns out she had hip dysplasia and was in pain, but still, it is challenging. But this, these monsters! If true, he beat the baby because he was mad at his wife! Beat him! He didn't get frustrated and shake the baby. I can't wrap my mind around it.

Personally, I think he beat Chance because he wanted to. And I think Bury did nothing to stop it because she didn't want to. JMO.

 

[EllieBee]

I remember my son literally crying for 3 or 4 hours non-stop. (Even had some Twitter posts about it show up in my Timehop the other day.) It was rough. I had a hard time with it. So yeah...I remember thinking, "I could see how someone with little self control or with anger issues or whatever could hurt their child." Thankfully, I wasn't alone and I knew to just leave the room.

You reacted like a human being, not a monster. Quick back story...at 18, I ran off and eloped, with a guy who turned out to be a loser, btw, but anyway... I joined the military and moved across the country from my family. 14 months later (4 months after my 19th bday), I had my first baby. That was before we all had cell phones, smart phones, and computers in every house. Long distance calls were expensive. I had no one to talk to. My then-husband was useless and always gone. I worked full time in the military. I was alone, tired, broke, young, and inexperienced. I remember one night my daughter (a few months old) wouldn't stop crying, and none of the usual things were working. Everything I'd read said to put the crying baby somewhere safe like a crib, and go into another room . So I did just that when I started to feel angry. Within 2 minutes, the guilt of ignoring my baby was overwhelming, and I quickly had her back in my arms . I'm not judging any parent that does the walk-away thing - sometimes you need to. Sometimes that's the best way to deal with it. I'm just saying if a teenager, alone, inexperienced, frustrated, etc can deal with it, anyone can. These ppl are just disgusting.

When a parent is pushed to their limits (and OMG, yes-babies and toddlers can make you see red and lose your cool), the RIGHT thing to do is EXACTLY what you did...separate. And if you do not have a trusted friend of family member to "spell you", you do whatever it takes to not act on your sleep-deprived anger.

Like I posted before, my DD was an easy infant. But as a toddler she wore me out and broke me down and my ex was always on the road. I had no help and rather than scream at or hit her, I would lock myself in my bathroom and sob. And she would knock on my door.

Not my proudest moment, but my choice kept her safe and me sane. And it is okay for your kids to see you sad. Even newborns. They learn emotional expression from us. "It is okay to be angry or sad and cry. It is not okay to hit".

You done good! :grouphug:

 

[mrsward]

I remember my daughter having colic and every night at 6 pm she would scream the place down for a couple of hrs she would have me in tears , not from anger just pure guilt , I was only 18 and had no family to help so in the end I ended up knocking on my neighbours door and handing her over for an hr , ( yes I did know the neighbour)

Not in a million hrs would I ever have wanted to hurt her though..

Put them down...walk away..breathe...

 

[ninij9]

In his very short life here on Earth all this little one knew was fear and pain...And I say to myself, What a wonderful world.
I'm so sorry baby Chance.

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[Ontario Mom]

Personally, I think he beat Chance because he wanted to. And I think Bury did nothing to stop it because she didn't want to. JMO.

Exactly that. A newborn is a drain on every level. Personal time, financially, emotionally, physically, psychologically. They're also a joy, blessing, amazing, sweet, precious, wonderful, gifts that most parents are so happy to have, they just push that drain thing aside and do whatever it takes to make it all work. And eventually, it does all even out. For those that genuinely love their children, that is.

KB and JW didn't want Chance and they made him go away. No remorse at all. They are both pure evil.

 

[ILikeToBendPages]

I'm going to a really bad, bad place with my interpretation of why this poor baby boy had trauma to his mouth and throat. I think pacifier and baby wipes are a smoke screen for what this vomit really put down that babies throat. I really don't want to know any more. Holy Mother Mary.

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Well I just had a terrible thought. I wonder if the wipe was used on his bottom then shoved down his throat. In the thumbsuckig photo he has a terrible rash on his left inner thigh, and I wonder if he took him in the bathroom so neighbors wouldn't hear his screams when he changed him.

I don't know how old he was when this was taken, but I'm glad he had his thumb to comfort him. His poor little legs. it takes my breath away

 

[SieSie]

In case anyone missed it here's the link again to the article that has the unredacted information from the arrest report, updated today at 5:06 EDT:

http://www.heraldtribune.com/article/20151021/ARTICLE/151029953?p=1&tc=pg

Thank you for the link - it's just awful, and DCF WAS notified earlier according to that link:

In addition, the DCF received a tip July 28, the day after Chance was born in a Charlotte County hospital, that Bury was misusing opiate prescription drugs. But it took no action.

BBM

 

[EllieBee]

Exactly that. A newborn is a drain on every level. Personal time, financially, emotionally, physically, psychologically. They're also a joy, blessing, amazing, sweet, precious, wonderful, gifts that most parents are so happy to have, they just push that drain thing aside and do whatever it takes to make it all work. And eventually, it does all even out. For those that genuinely love their children, that is.

KB and JW didn't want Chance and they made him go away. No remorse at all. They are both pure evil.

My daughter is a teenager, soon to be own her own ( heart pain) and I will often still get in her bed and curl up behind her and smell her hair. She still smells like "her". And many mornings my taller-than-me girl creeps into my bed after my DH leaves for work for a cuddle. Most precious part of my day.

Do you think it would be weird if I moved in once she gets married so I can still cuddle? No? Stalkerish? Lol

Nothing about Chance's story is funny, so I am sorry for making light. I know that feeling of screaming into a pillow or bursting into tears the moment help arrives.

But when you love your kids, you choose what is right (not always, but on the big things).

Poor Chance was never loved. Not by his parents, not by his extended family. He was dead for a month before anyone cared. I hope that if I am dead for an hour, there is someone to notice and to care. Maybe that is why I am at WS. We are the people that care for the forgotten.

 

[ninij9]

Well I just had a terrible thought. I wonder if the wipe was used on his bottom then shoved down his throat. In the thumbsuckig photo he has a terrible rash on his left inner thigh, and I wonder if he took him in the bathroom so neighbors wouldn't hear his screams when he changed him.

I wouldn't put it past him.
Poor, poor baby. I just can't.

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[Mimiof8]

It's hard to follow this case, my granddaughter will be 9 weeks this Saturday. She had her shots today, my daughter just called saying she's running a slight fever. My gd was screaming in the background. I can't even imagine how loud Chance must have screamed.

This makes me worry so much because her father is a recovering prescription drug addict. They've been together 8 years, married for 3 years. His sobriety is good right now and he's employed. He's relapsed numerous times but typically isn't violent. But I still worry.

 

[TeaTime]

The bathroom door is still on its hinges? I would have torn it down before I let him hurt my child. I would have killed him with a frying pan to his head or a butcher knife in his heart.

This one just plops the infant in the crib and walks away after clearing his throat of whatever and admonishing daddy with 'you are going to break his neck". Blood in their bed, in the bathroom - splattered everywhere.

Daddy shoved something in the child's throat to kill him. There is no other outcome when the airway is plugged. He meant to kill Chance and they waited hours before checking on him, hoping he would die before feeding time. He didn't, he suffered a while longer as they watched and did nothing. Then of course, left him there, dead, while they got high until his rotting corpse began to stink. Then into some trash bags in the closet until they decided to dump him in a remote grave, naked and decomposed.

Daddy had to wear gloves because the body was falling apart and liquefying after 8 days.

Then off on vacation!

 

[ninij9]

My daughter is a teenager, soon to be own her own ( heart pain) and I will often still get in her bed and curl up behind her and smell her hair. She still smells like "her". And many mornings my taller-than-me girl creeps into my bed after my DH leaves for work for a cuddle. Most precious part of my day.

Do you think it would be weird if I moved in once she gets married so I can still cuddle? No? Stalkerish? Lol

Nothing about Chance's story is funny, so I am sorry for making light. I know that feeling of screaming into a pillow or bursting into tears the moment help arrives.

But when you love your kids, you choose what is right (not always, but on the big things).

Poor Chance was never loved. Not by his parents, not by his extended family. He was dead for a month before anyone cared. I hope that if I am dead for an hour, there is someone to notice and to care. Maybe that is why I am at WS. We are the people that care for the forgotten.

Your post made me smile(for the first time on this thread). I too have a taller than me beautiful daughter who still comes and sits on my lap for a hug. I too wish to follow her when she goes and grows. She is the light of my life.
Aren't we blessed? It's so tragic that not every child gets loved like that.

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[bluesneakers]

My daughter is a teenager, soon to be own her own ( heart pain) and I will often still get in her bed and curl up behind her and smell her hair. She still smells like "her". And many mornings my taller-than-me girl creeps into my bed after my DH leaves for work for a cuddle. Most precious part of my day.

Do you think it would be weird if I moved in once she gets married so I can still cuddle? No? Stalkerish? Lol

Nothing about Chance's story is funny, so I am sorry for making light. I know that feeling of screaming into a pillow or bursting into tears the moment help arrives.

But when you love your kids, you choose what is right (not always, but on the big things).

Poor Chance was never loved. Not by his parents, not by his extended family. He was dead for a month before anyone cared. I hope that if I am dead for an hour, there is someone to notice and to care. Maybe that is why I am at WS. We are the people that care for the forgotten.

Between Chance being dead for a month before anyone cared and Janiya Thomas being missing for a year without anyone noticing I'm ready to give up on people.

 

[Ontario Mom]

Between Chance being dead for a month before anyone cared and Janiya Thomas being missing for a year without anyone noticing I'm ready to give up on people.

Don't give up. Thankfully, these monsters are the exception and not the rule.