GA - Teacher Accused Of Writing Love Letters To 12 Yr. Old Student

[IrishMist]

I agree with you. Alcohol and drugs many times just lower the inhibitions so the true colors are seen. There would have to be some attraction to the child for molestation to take place. Most normal, healthy adults would be repelled by the thought even when under the influence.

If I'm understanding the concept correctly, what SCM is saying is that there is a difference between pedophiles and molesters. (Then add a third category of those that wouldn't harm a child in that manner.)

 

[SewingDeb]

If I'm understanding the concept correctly, what SCM is saying is that there is a difference between pedophiles and molesters. (Then add a third category of those that wouldn't harm a child in that manner.)

Thanks. I understand what she is saying. Even so, I think there has to be some attraction to children for the thought to even enter their minds.

 

[White Rain]

Thanks. I understand what she is saying. Even so, I think there has to be some attraction to children for the thought to even enter their minds.

I agree, and I don't care if it's one child, or twenty, they are a pedophile in my book and should, never be released from jail for the remainder of their life. I'd actually prefer death for them even on the first charge. but most of the time that doesn't happen.

 

[sherri79]

If I'm understanding the concept correctly, what SCM is saying is that there is a difference between pedophiles and molesters. (Then add a third category of those that wouldn't harm a child in that manner.)

if i understand its 3 types. 1 normal people who wont hurt kids. 2 pedos that find kids sexy. 3 evil people who want to hurt some1 and dont care if you are 8 or 80.

 

[southcitymom]

if i understand its 3 types. 1 normal people who wont hurt kids. 2 pedos that find kids sexy. 3 evil people who want to hurt some1 and dont care if you are 8 or 80.

well spoken!

 

[sherri79]

so where would that leave us with this teacher? i wouldnt say she is in group 1. nor in group 3.

and does every1 in group 2 have to act on their feelings?are there people who find kids sexy but know it is wrong and any action will harm the child so they never ever act on it?

 

[IrishMist]

Thanks. I understand what she is saying. Even so, I think there has to be some attraction to children for the thought to even enter their minds.

No doubt in my mind.

 

[southcitymom]

so where would that leave us with this teacher? i wouldnt say she is in group 1. nor in group 3.

and does every1 in group 2 have to act on their feelings?are there people who find kids sexy but know it is wrong and any action will harm the child so they never ever act on it?

I would say that this teacher, like Mary Kay LeTourneau, would be categorized as a situational child molester if she had molested this child, which I don't think she did.

Certainly, it appears she was thinking of the child in an intimate way and perhaps thinking of having sexual contact with the child. I can't really tell from what I've read of the letter.

As to the - "do-all-pedophiles-act-criminally-on-their-urges" question, I can only say that I'm sure there are some who don't out of morality and instead fulfill themselves with fantasy. That said, we know there are many who do. This is one of those areas where more research should be done.

I don't think any of us HAVE to act on our sexual urges, but it's difficult not to!

 

[Jeana (DP)]

Yes, they could be - my point was just that not everyone who is attracted in such a manner is a pedophile. A pedopohile is attracted exclusively or primarily to prepubescent or peripubescent children.

This woman may or may not have become a sex offender, but we don't have enough information to call her a pedophile, IMHO.

Fair enough.

 

[sherri79]

i have read about a man whole liked to molest kids about 9-10 years old. he had toddlers at the time he was caught. he went to prison for a few years and his wife sttod by him. when it was time for him to get out he asked for a surgery first to remove his testi. he was scared he would molest his own kids who were 9-10 at the time of his release. the courts refused. the day he was let out of jail his lawyer took him for the surgery before he went home to his family.

i guess its the closest i have ever seen to morality in the case of a molester. it would have been better if he had the surgery before he ever touched the first child but atleast he knew as long as he had a sex drive he would want sex with kids so he did what he could to stop himself.

 

[southcitymom]

Thanks. I understand what she is saying. Even so, I think there has to be some attraction to children for the thought to even enter their minds.

Here's an example that you may find repugnant, but that might give some insight into how the attraction isn't necessarily "sexual" with some situational child molesters.

I once sponsored a woman who, in the course of a 5th step, admitted to me that when she was old enough to know better (late teens/early twenties) she had sexual contact once with a young boy. The contact was not for her own sexual gratification, but a result of a compulsion and poor impulse control. It should be noted that this woman has several mental illness diagnoses and that she may (big may - she really can't say for sure) have been sexually molested when she was a child.

This happened many many years ago and this woman has never had the urge to engage in this behavior since. Her predominant sexual orientation is homosexual and she has been in a long term homosexual relationship for years. Now, this woman molested a child. But it doesn't seem like she did it because of a sexual attraction - it seems like she did it because she knew she could get away with it because the child was too young to tell. She could have engaged in similar behavior with an animal - not because she has a sexual attraction to animals, but because - like the child - an animal can't tell and she could have gotten away with it.

 

[southcitymom]

i have read about a man whole liked to molest kids about 9-10 years old. he had toddlers at the time he was caught. he went to prison for a few years and his wife sttod by him. when it was time for him to get out he asked for a surgery first to remove his testi. he was scared he would molest his own kids who were 9-10 at the time of his release. the courts refused. the day he was let out of jail his lawyer took him for the surgery before he went home to his family.

i guess its the closest i have ever seen to morality in the case of a molester. it would have been better if he had the surgery before he ever touched the first child but atleast he knew as long as he had a sex drive he would want sex with kids so he did what he could to stop himself.

That's a powerful example of someone putting children ahead of their own urges to harm. Would that this type of selflessness were more common.

 

[sherri79]

No offense taken at all, Nova! I just want to be extra-clear when discussing something so sensitive....and, as I have proved time and again, clarity and brevity don't always go hand in hand for me.

I think your LeTourneau/prison analogy is apt. Often, there seems to be a "different" type of dynamic occurring when older female teachers are attracted to young male students. I don't know quite how to "classify" it; I just don't necessarily classify it as pedophelia. There seems to be a tremendous fantasy element that is not necessarily connected to sex.

In this case, it seems the boy was not physically molested and for that I am grateful.

the fantasy vs just sex statement i would find true for most women. for men it can be sex and just sex much more often than for women. aimed at men only needs 1 or more bodies. aimed at women tends to add some fantasy the women can latch on to. so i don't find it surprising that male predators just grab any child they can and female think they are in love. men and women work different on a sexual level. we both have brains and know its wrong. that is why i tend to see her as no different than a male teacher who had necked sketches he drew from fantasy of a little girl in his class. a child was not touched or hurt. would we not think the male teacher was a danger?

 

[southcitymom]

the fantasy vs just sex statement i would find true for most women. for men it can be sex and just sex much more often than for women. aimed at men only needs 1 or more bodies. aimed at women tends to add some fantasy the women can latch on to. so i don't find it surprising that male predators just grab any child they can and female think they are in love. men and women work different on a sexual level. we both have brains and know its wrong. that is why i tend to see her as no different than a male teacher who had necked sketches he drew from fantasy of a little girl in his class. a child was not touched or hurt. would we not think the male teacher was a danger?

I agree with this insightful post and, in terms of molestation, a kiss from a woman who thinks she is in love has the same trust-damaging effects as one from a man who is "just" sexually motivated. Always, child molestation reaps terrible consequences for the child - regardless of what path the adult took to get to a point where they were willing to cross such a boundary.

 

[sherri79]

I agree with this insightful post and, in terms of molestation, a kiss from a woman who thinks she is in love has the same trust-damaging effects as one from a man who is "just" sexually motivated. Always, child molestation reaps terrible consequences for the child - regardless of what path the adult took to get to a point where they were willing to cross such a boundary.

and i agree that research and understanding can help greatly in these cases. what makes a boy who is molested more likely to become a predator than a girl? how should boy and girl victims be treated differently to ensure they don't become molesters? drugs to lower a mans sex drive can lessen the chance he re-offends, will that work as well for women? once a adult crosses the line i really don't care about why any more. i hope more research in this area could save the kids before they ever get to that point. until we get that cure for the kids the only hope i see is to lock the adult offenders away for life so we at least keep them from harming more kids and spreading their sickness.

 

[White Rain]

UPDATE: Teacher Speaks Out



CLAYTON COUNTY, Ga. -- The Clayton County teacher accused of writing love letters to a 12-year-old student says God has forgiven her and she wants everyone to do the same.

Channel 2’s Tom Jones broke the story of the letters that now have Tonya Johnson under investigation.

Jones said he repeatedly tried to get Johnson’s side of the story before Channel 2’s initial story aired earlier this week. After the story aired, Jones sent Johnson a letter and that’s when Johnson called him to explain her side of the story.

“I am not in love with a 12-year-old boy. The only person I am in love with is my husband,” said Johnson.

Johnson is accused of writing a letter to a 12-year-old student which says, “I have been suffering in this marriage for a long time and you seem to be the only peace in my life.”

The Clayton County school system allowed Johnson to resign in lieu of being fired when they found out about the alleged letter.

The boy’s mother got a temporary protective order after Johnson apparently sent another letter and called the boy’s home.

Johnson told Jones, “I asked God for forgiveness and he has forgiven me. I asked the parents for forgiveness and they have chosen not to.” She also told Jones, “Everybody in life makes mistakes and I made a mistake.”

She said people might not understand what happened but that God understands.

Jones said Johnson would only talk if she was allowed to speak without being questioned.

Johnson said she’s ready to move on with her life.
http://www.wsbtv.com/news/13297775/detail.html

 

[sherri79]

ok this letter bothers me. i dont see the personal responsibility i would expect.

Jones said Johnson would only talk if she was allowed to speak without being questioned.

sometimes when you screw up this big you dont get to set the rules about how much you suffer to get people to forgive you.

The boy’s mother got a temporary protective order after Johnson apparently sent another letter and called the boy’s home.

after she gets caught with 1 letter she sends another and calls. no wonder mom dont forgive her. just because you say you are sorry does not make it true. just because you are sorry does not mean you have the right to expect forgiveness.

 

[White Rain]

ok this letter bothers me. i dont see the personal responsibility i would expect. sometimes when you screw up this big you dont get to set the rules about how much you suffer to get people to forgive you.after she gets caught with 1 letter she sends another and calls. no wonder mom dont forgive her. just because you say you are sorry does not make it true. just because you are sorry does not mean you have the right to expect forgiveness.

In that letter she wrote she sure doesn't sound like she's in love with her husband!

 

[Mygirlsadie]

White Rain...you said it right when you said when it comes to your kids you cant afford to be fair! I agree with you. I won't take chances when it comes to my kids and if I am proven wrong in the end then I will apologize & if I hurt someones feelings I am sorry but when it comes to them they come first and I will worry about fairness later. My daughter is almost 14 and one of her male teachers made a comment to her that I found inapropriate.He basically was questioning her about who she dates and then he said something along the lines of ''well I am sure any boys wouldnt mind you spreading your seed in their pollen''....I was shocked mad wanted to kill him pull her out of the school wanted him fired you name it! I don't know what the outcome of it is going to be because its not over yet but I don't play when it comes to her or my sons. Keep your grubby paws off and keep your dirty comments to yourself because teachers are there to teach they are not there to check out the highschool hunk or the school beauty queen or give their input on my childs love life...(or lack there-of)

I don't think it's nationwide news...just my local GA news out of an Atlanta station. I respect your feelings on the subject but I can't agree with them...maybe because I have two small girls, and with all the news of the child rapes/killings these days I want to know about everything that goes on like this...I know it's supposed to be innocent until proven guilty, but in my own mind I think "Well, at least I know yet another person to keep my kids away from."
Fair? Maybe not..but when it comes to my kids I can't afford to be fair. Now I am not saying this woman is guilty, and there certainly has been nothing to say that she actually molested a child, but to me it doesn't matter...the fear is too much for me.

 

[southcitymom]

I think it's great that the boy's parents and the school administrators moved swiftly to protect the child once all of this started to unfold.

It does not sound like this teacher will be able to teach again and that's an appropriate outcome. I hope she seeks counseling for whatever stressors led her to become infatuated with this child and act so recklessly.