SuziQ
Former Member
- Joined
- Jun 6, 2007
- Messages
- 39,600
- Reaction score
- 52,090
I was molested by my oldest brother for 7 years. When I finally told a teacher, who alerted authorities, my brother was arrested at his college & my parents were called to come to my school, where they were told what was going on. In front of the principal, my mom was solicitous & nice to me, but as soon as we were in the car to go home, she turned on me & wanted to know why I'd made up such lies about my brother. He admitted that he'd abused me & my mother STILL refused to believe it. To this day, my entire family protects my brother & maintains he's a great guy. Even one of my sisters who was also abused by him (he molested both her & me on our parents' bed). The story that my family maintains is that I lied about my brother for attention. The fact that he was convicted of a class A felony means nothing except that I was horribly malicious in trying to wreck his life.
What's my point? I'm not horribly damaged even though I spent my life in an environment where molestation was an "okay" thing & the victim was blamed & demeaned & treated like crap once the truth came out. I grew up pretty screwed up, but counseling & choosing to cut my biological family out of my life so that the cycle of abuse could be broken & my own children could be spared the crap I went through was the route I chose.
I know it's not an easy road for survivors of incest, but dang it, TS didn't have to choose to give her children to a convicted felon!!! I don't care HOW bad her childhood was! I DON'T CARE how challenging her life has been. There's no good excuse in my book for not taking care of your kids. Absolutely zero. As such, I am so thoroughly disgusted by the adults involved in this case that I want to.... well, I can't say 'cuz it would get me a T.O.![]()
BBM. Thank you! The myth that abusers go on to abuse is probably the only shame I carry as an adult abuse victim and makes me hesitant to share my history. It's a myth that is simply not true. The few that choose to inflict the same pain they receive....they no longer are victims, they are perps.