I am an adoptive parent who has known a myriad of other adoptive parents. When one adopts a child who is older, there are often social/emotional/educational/physical issues that are present for a large variety of reasons-- abandonment, poor maternal health while in utero, alcohol/drug exposure in utero, orphanage neglect/abuse, lack of nourishment, and much more. The reason that adoptions often take longer than any parent wants is to ensure full knowledge (as much as one can) and to vette/educate the adoptive parents on issues related to older child adoptions.
This child was adopted in the country of her birth and had to be identified by the US government as qualified for the VISA in which she travelled. Someone relinquished her in the US. It is not uncommon for people to create private rehoming deals based on "behavior." Often the families that rush to adoption, especially of special needs children, are on a mission to save an orphan. However, the work of bonding with a young child who has had relationships interrupted or who have been institutional care is difficult work that requires time, commitment, and is often not easily done with other special needs children in the home. Don't get me wrong, I know lots of families who have been successful. However, the secret rehoming network that exists out there is frightening because these children become disappeared-- the immediate family is relieved to have them gone, the extended family does not necessarily feel compelled to stay in touch--- so, who watches for these kids? The answer is no one does. There are many stories of children in these situations being murdered, raped, physically abused. So, in that sense, this girl is very lucky-- she was rehomed not once but twice with the second rehoming resulting in her living in an apartment alone. Thank goodness for the family that has fought hard to adopt/care for her. She is at great risk for doing all kinds of negative social behavior based on her history of abandonment but they seem committed to giving her the best that they can.
The Indiana woman in this case had made a living and public airing of her older son's disability. I doubt that there was ever a need for an emergency adoption. Why? Because this child would have been placed in Foster Care if a suitable home was not found. The family who had custody would have some legal issues but it could have been handled by the courts and a foster placement or respite care plan could have been made. I am interested to here the facts behind an emergency adoption.
I will conjecture (as in IMHO) a couple of things based on my experiences:
1. Child was abandoned by first adoptive family, not long after getting here. She may have had behavioral issues that were not disclosed to the second family to adopt her.
2. The agency who had facilitated realized that if the home country found out this child was abandoned that they would risk limited or non-existent referrals in the future (adoptive families don't like to wait). Many agencies provide child updates in the home country or in some cases it is legally required and part of the home country's adoption procedures.
3. (IIRC) This child was abandoned a second time which would really create red flags in the home country and possibly the state in which the child resided for the agency who is supposed to insure child safety. All agencies need to be licensed in their home state, so which agency/agencies did the first, second, and third placement (with the Indiana family?. Was the third adoption to the family in Indiana done through an agency or attorney (both would require a home study and post-placement reporting for the 90 days post-adoption in FL)? Where are the home studies? Where is the paper trail of this child?
Lastly, it is important that this child get access to her Certificate of Citizenship, if she does not/has not already been given it, especially since the Indiana family who abandoned her and changed her age abandoned her. If she ever winds up in trouble with the law in this country or wants to work, she will need her paperwork set up properly and have copies that she can keep going forward. Adoptees with uncompleted citizenship paperwork or questionable paperwork have been deported from this country when they had run ins with the law-- many of whom were adopted as tiny babies and never learned the language of their home country but were sent back to that country with no support systems (
Deportation a ‘Death Sentence’ to Adoptees After a Lifetime in the U.S.). This young woman has a disability that may make any transition to her home country impossible if she is deported.
