Found Deceased Ks - Lucas Hernandez, 5, Wichita, 17 Feb 2018 #31

[Amonet]

I agree. I suppose I should have better explained in my original post that my wondering why it doesn't seem to be a priority for him or even on his radar doesn't mean I feel he is a fit parent who can provide a safe, stable, loving home. I was already questioning that.

Those thoughts/doubts were compounded when I realized that he had never mentioned her in interviews or articles; there was never a mention of a desire to "get MH back" along with his desire to find Lucas. Sad. Depressing really, for MH, even if she is better off with different caregivers in a different home.

I wonder if it might be that he has a propensity for wanting to separate issues in his mind, and that he doesn't want media articles and public debate surrounding MH, because the issues with her are separate from Lucas' disappearance and death. With Lucas JH would have known that whatever happened to cause Lucas to disappear that he needed public help and that included media stories about the disappearance. I think that's also why JH balked at the abuse allegations being brought up as I think in his mind he wanted the sole focus to be on finding Lucas. But he also said he accepted that abuse allegations would be valid to discuss after Lucas was found, presumably because if Lucas was found alive then there would be a necessity to ask whether or not EG and/or he himself would be suitable ongoing caregivers for Lucas. I honestly think that JH felt the abuse allegations were a distraction from finding Lucas, as opposed to what we felt, and that is being the key to finding Lucas, because he was separating the two things in his mind whereas we were seeing them as part of a whole. That might also be how he managed to stay in a relationship with a woman who he had had violent confrontations with if he felt that her violence with him was separate from her ability to care for the children (for Lucas). He might have a problem thinking about more than one big issue at a time and so this separation of issues might feel like a necessity for him. I personally find it extremely hard when I have one big issue pushing in on me, but when it's raised to three or four, then I really break. JH might have developed this outlook as a coping mechanism, and in its place it might not be a bad one, but when it came to deciphering dangers for Lucas it's failed miserably. That's just a hypothesis.

But as far as MH is concerned, I wouldn't say it's a bad thing for JH to not discuss her situation in public, in the media. She needs privacy.

 

[Smarty Pants]

What can we take from Lucas’ 30 something threads to help save the next ones?

MOO
I've thought about this, too. My mind goes back to one of the first DV calls when JH & EG lived in the apartment. IIRC the report noted that there was a child's table turned over. IMO this was where Lucas was first failed. (And where a lot of kids are.) If there could be a law that says if there is a DV arrest when it's obvious there are children in the household, one has to take anger management/parenting classes. Make there be serious ramifications if the classes aren't completed within 45 days or you get a point against your driver's license. And so on & so forth...but my mind keeps coming back to some people who just won't report DV to skirt this. It would also put a strain on an already overwhelmed system. But IMO change needs to begin at that first DV call where children are present/residing in the household. I just don't have the words (sorry-brain fog) or the workarounds to make it a successful program. Can anyone help me make what I'm trying to say not sound like the rantings of a sleep-deprived crazy lady?

All MOO

 

[Charliegizmo49]

Sad we even have to be here sleuthing the subject at all. But well worth effort to change the outcome for the next LUCAS. you are all so caring, inciteful and compassionate. Thank you for letting me be a part of this group.

 

[AgeofAquaruis]

Soooooo, technically, EG’s cousin was a mandated reporter since she was/is a certified nurse’s aide.

Dr.s note???????

 

[margarita25]

I’m thinking about Diana Alvarez this morning, who has never been found, and may never be found IMO considering the possible terrain/alligators, etc.

Just amazed still that Lucas has been found. That was a really, really close one imo, as far as the likelihood of recovery, considering her silence to date and of course suicide.

I do think that maaaybe, in the future if there was a flood or something, or if there were workers in that area (roads, utility, landscape, etc) that he could have been found one day...(partial skeletal remains possibly) but what if DM never got involved??

ETA: I suppose it’s useless to think about “what if’s”, but can you imagine? How many years would we we all be asking “Where is Lucas”?

 

[Smarty Pants]

It shouldn't take a random caseworker arbitrarily deciding based on abusers words and cursory glances whether a child's life is at risk.

I knew this 30 years ago. Government is just too good to make that one itty bitty change. Move the heck up off 'has to be in dire threat of dying right this minute' to Child is suffering.

When adults and agencies recognize the cost our next generation is paying by pretending everything is fine, it will end.

But it never will. Because everyone wants to point the finger instead of stand for that one little truth... abuse is so intolerable we won't even look at it to recognize it where it is.

This!! Fantastic & accurate post!!

 

[flute4peace]

Some very thought-filled and thought-provoking posts here the past day or so.

I like the idea mentioned by someone upthread of some sort of "reporting party" advocacy program as a part of Lucas' Legacy, to give support and guidance to family members who have abuse to report that seems to fall on deaf ears.

 

[Charliegizmo49]

I'm almost always up at this time anymore.

If LE has anything on others, they'll save it for the trial/s, no?

'Everyone else' is an afterthought in EG's mind, sort of like failsafe mechanisms when she can't manage a thing on her own insipid insight.

Musing on those central figures who are vital to this case yet have no place in it, so to speak.

I’m up as well reading your thoughts and trying still to understand this mess of a case.

I focus on how Lucas must have felt as a little boy trying to understand. He so rarely was shown true love when his Daddy was gone to work, and probably had a hard time coping with the difference in everything when his Daddy was there and when he was gone. Unless someone comes forward we will never know what EG did to him. We can only see the pictures of a little boy bruised from head to toe with gross weight loss.

Not a pretty picture. And I would guess EG denied it to her death. I don’t care for the way she ended her life, and don’t understand her motives. But it’s evident she left a wake of death, pain and destruction for anyone close to her. The EG legacy will live on for people smarter than me to tear apart and analyze.

Lucas and his legacy is important now, and trying to understand it enough to prevent it from happening again.

 

[Smarty Pants]

I appreciate y'all so much for sharing your insight & wisdom. You each bring something amazing to the table with every post you write. This is the only place where I can like one post that says one thing, then like the next post that says something totally opposite. I love the respect that is shown to everyone & their varying opinions. Y'all rock!

 

[whatsnext]

I appreciate y'all so much for sharing your insight & wisdom. You each bring something amazing to the table with every post you write. This is the only place where I can like one post that says one thing, then like the next post that says something totally opposite. I love the respect that is shown to everyone & their varying opinions. Y'all rock!

Totally agree!!

 

[margarita25]

Again, how fantastic that some here had the opportunity to train under one of the best SAR groups in the world. And even those who didn’t work with TES, the ones who searched on your own, in your own best capacities, surely what you learned is valuable.

Some of you newer members were brought here to Lucas’ threads as locals. And were broken in quite quickly I have to say as far as feet on the ground. Again, an amazing collective effort by so many in so many ways, one of the biggest responses I’ve ever seen by members on WS.

With all that being said, a thought here: Perhaps those who now have the experience of searching/isolating potential search areas can apply this to other cases on WS, past and future...I for one would like to see some of you guys take a look at Relisha Rudd’s case for example—-as I mentioned the perp offed himself, but last I remember they were searching a park...anyway not to take the focus away from Lucas here, just giving one example of many, many, many children here on Webaleuths who have never been found. I invite our new members to please poke around the forums here if you haven’t already. Everything you guys did for Lucas with the flyers, media, organizing events, etc....so many ways to further apply this hands on experience for other kids. So anyway I hope you guys stick around and contribute in other “cases”.

 

[motheroffour]

MOO
I've thought about this, too. My mind goes back to one of the first DV calls when JH & EG lived in the apartment. IIRC the report noted that there was a child's table turned over. IMO this was where Lucas was first failed. (And where a lot of kids are.) If there could be a law that says if there is a DV arrest when it's obvious there are children in the household, one has to take anger management/parenting classes. Make there be serious ramifications if the classes aren't completed within 45 days or you get a point against your driver's license. And so on & so forth...but my mind keeps coming back to some people who just won't report DV to skirt this. It would also put a strain on an already overwhelmed system. But IMO change needs to begin at that first DV call where children are present/residing in the household. I just don't have the words (sorry-brain fog) or the workarounds to make it a successful program. Can anyone help me make what I'm trying to say not sound like the rantings of a sleep-deprived crazy lady?

All MOO

I think you are on the right track in your thinking and you have also foreseen some of the roadblocks to your initial solution. I don’t really have anything to add to your ideas other than continue to refine the consequences and find a way to not further burden an already overburdened court and DFS system There are always going to be children who fall through the cracks so you are looking for a way to fill in more of those cracks.

 

[Kamm5]

Again, how fantastic that some here had the opportunity to train under one of the best SAR groups in the world. And even those who didn’t work with TES, the ones who searched on your own, in your own best capacities, surely what you learned is valuable.

Some of you newer members were brought here to Lucas’ threads as locals. And were broken in quite quickly I have to say as far as feet on the ground. Again, an amazing collective effort by so many in so many ways, one of the biggest responses I’ve ever seen by members on WS.

With all that being said, a thought here: Perhaps those who now have the experience of searching/isolating potential search areas can apply this to other cases on WS, past and future...I for one would like to see some of you guys take a look at Relisha Rudd’s case for example—-as I mentioned the perp offed himself, but last I remember they were searching a park...anyway not to take the focus away from Lucas here, just giving one example of many, many, many children here on Webaleuths who have never been found. I invite our new members to please poke around the forums here if you haven’t already. Everything you guys did for Lucas with the flyers, media, organizing events, etc....so many ways to further apply this hands on experience for other kids. So anyway I hope you guys stick around and contribute in other “cases”.

I agree .. I would still love to hear from Henry with his thoughts

 

[DakotaMayi]

I just have to say this. I've been in the court system. I've worked for attorneys even. I come from a legal family background. I don't claim to know much, but I'm familiar with family court. It's typically called liars court.
I believe that EG's ex did not want his sons around her at all......for their own protection. She gained unsupervised custody. I'm sure he worried sick every time he had to drop his sons off to her for 7 hours on a Sunday visitation. I think when JH stopped the ex's one son with a rough push (I'm not saying it was ok) he used it to his advantage in the courts to keep his sons away from EG. I feel certain this was his goal.

Good. Well played. These boys are now safe.

 

[DakotaMayi]

I believe JH was/is a loving father. He loved and trusted the wrong woman. She played him. I've seen it time and again.
I don't think right now is the right time for him to take custody of his daughter. He can't possibly be in a good place right now. I really hurt for him.
But I do think he will protect his daughter when he gets her back. I believe he's had a huge wake up call!
I also believe he needs some guidance. I think he has a good family that will nurture him thru this. And amazingly, I think Jamie will help him enormously. She and her family are good people.

I'm quoting you kkdj, but it's not necessarily directed at you. I can't get with all of this "love" and understanding that there is for JH. Ok, yes, she played him. He trusted the wrong woman, but, and I hope no one minds me voicing my opinion here, but the poor boy was covered in injuries, head to toe. His face, his arms even his little bottom. We could see it the minute we saw the photos. No one looking at those photos would say "oh, don't worry, he just fell." Yes, it's terrible that he has lost his son, but I feel like I am the only one not giving this guy a hall pass. He left his injured child with a woman who was clearly injuring him. It's not like he never saw the injuries... I don't understand how anyone can pass this off as "he loved the wrong woman". The evidence was there to see.

 

[Kamm5]

Some very thought-filled and thought-provoking posts here the past day or so.

I like the idea mentioned by someone upthread of some sort of "reporting party" advocacy program as a part of Lucas' Legacy, to give support and guidance to family members who have abuse to report that seems to fall on deaf ears.

Yes when I posted that my thoughts were what would I do If I reported like they did and nothing what’s happening they did try to help Lucas I just think if we had some places they could go to show their photos that could help them with all the agencies and advise them . Because they did try

 

[nyvictoria]

Thoughts at 4am...sorry for multiple posts but I think I'm the only one up lol...

So, IF EG had assistance, at least after the fact, this means that she has not thrown them under the bus (as we know it), even though she led DM to Lucas' body.

So, is this her not mentioning them as to protect them? Or is there really nobody to tell on?

I can’t picture EG having any loyalty to anyone, family included. IMO if anyone else was directly involved in Lucas’ death or the transporting and hiding of his body, I’m fairly certain she would have told DM. She may have shared information with a confidant about Lucas’ death and/or where he was hidden but I don’t think anyone else participated in the actual crimes. She would have hurled that person right under the bus

JMO

 

[whatsnext]

I'm quoting you kkdj, but it's necessarily directed at you. I can't get with all of this "love" and understanding that there is for JH. Ok, yes, she played him. He trusted the wrong woman, but, and I hope no one minds me voicing my opinion here, but the poor boy was covered in injuries, head to toe. His face, his arms even his little bottom. We could see it the minute we saw the photos. No one looking at those photos would say "oh, don't worry, he just fell." Yes, it's terrible that he has lost his son, but I feel like I am the only one not giving this guy a hall pass. He left his injured child with a woman who was clearly injuring him. It's not like he never saw the injuries... I don't understand how anyone can pass this off as "he loved the wrong woman". The evidence was there to see.

Yes, he must have seen it but he chose Emily over Lucas. I believe he loves Lucas, but that guilt will stay with him and he can't run from it.

 

[nyvictoria]

Yes when I posted that my thoughts were what would I do If I reported like they did and nothing what’s happening they did try to help Lucas I just think if we had some places they could go to show their photos that could help them with all the agencies and advise them . Because they did try

This is JMHO and I have no professional knowledge regarding reporting child abuse. Isn’t the best action to take the child to the ER? The abuse can be documented and police or CPS called on the spot.

 

[margarita25]

I can’t picture EG having any loyalty to anyone, family included. IMO if anyone else was directly involved in Lucas’ death or the transporting and hiding of his body, I’m fairly certain she would have told DM. She may have shared information with a confidant about Lucas’ death and/or where he was hidden but I don’t think anyone else participated in the actual crimes. She would have hurled that person right under the bus

JMO

Thank you for your response...this is exactly the kind of thoughts/feedback I was hoping to hear, wondering about.