Kyron Horman's stepmother is a profile in contradictions....

[eyes4crime]

And then again maybe the in laws knew her a lot more than we did and so have reason to think the way they did.

Rightly or wrongly..Ecker adopting J worked out very well for her that can not be denied.

JMO

Eker gained a son - he loved his son. Dad #1 gave up his parental rights because of meth use. IMO everyone gained, especially the Terri's boy. moo

 

[21merc7]

Eker gained a son - he loved his son. Dad #1 gave up his parental rights because of meth use. IMO everyone gained, especially the Terri's boy. moo

Originally Posted by BeanE
Conflicting reports regarding the disciplining at school.

June 25 KGW Full Raw Interview -5:05

Kaine: We've had some concerns...

Desiree: Yeah.

Kaine: ...along with his teacher around listening to instructions from adults while at school.

So we've been working with him to try to understand that we need to work with the faculty there, the parents there, the volunteers there to make sure that when they give him instructions he's following those.

He normally does a very good job at doing that. Just occasionally we get a little bit of that behavior so we've really reinforced with him that if you're at school and you're working with a parent or a teacher, you need to follow their instructions.

So in that particular environment he would be expected to follow the instructions of an adult...
Desiree: Yeah.

Kaine: ...at school. Outside of school he's very well versed in the stranger danger and everything else, but in that one particular setting that's the type of behavior that's been reinforced through all of us.
Desiree: Yeah.



Note: Desiree nods affirmatively throughout this whole thing.


http://www.kgw.com/video/featured-vi...-97177194.html


Funny how things have changed.



Does no one else see any significance in those quotes? If anything screams to me that Kyron could easily have been led from the school that morning by a relative stranger, it is those words.

This is probably OT for this thread but, I still think that the account of Kyron's disappearance by his deskmate, TP, rings true.

I think something else is apparent about Kyron that is in conflict with his description as shy, quiet and somewhat fearful. It did not seem amiss for him to have wandered off to the bathroom or to get a drink, without his teacher's permission. When you have a little boy who is actively being taught to obey adult/authority figures while in school and that school is suddenly filled with 300 extra people, a perfect storm of opportunity exists for predators.

OK sorry for the OT. I have a lot of thoughts about that article but most have already been raised by some of our quick minded group.

I have been trying to scream that since day one. Thank you.

 

[human]

Eker gained a son - he loved his son. Dad #1 gave up his parental rights because of meth use. IMO everyone gained, especially the Terri's boy. moo

and he's back with bio dad and has gone there summers.

It's always better to be loved by many.

Interesting that he was sent to the Grandparents first however.

Sounds like a nice kid. I hope they provide him with counseling.

 

[Really]

Excuse me ??????


:furious:

...It's about respect. You can't just spend money without having a budget for your household. Clearly, Terri was going over budget for some items. That shows a lack of respect for her husband.

 

[tiredblondy]

Interesting. Not that way where I live. I believe it's 30 % for the first child, and then I don't know how the percentages go.

Perhaps you are thinking of custody. If it's 50/50, nobody pays.

But otherwise, it's strictly percentage of income.

Same here except for the 50/50 custody,not time spent with children.
In that situation things like med. insurance, braces, etc are examined and it is determine who will pay for what. Sometimes it is ordered that one of the parents must continue to provide medical insurance until the child is 18 or finishes college. For example, NC has this specific guideline that says if you make between 25,000 and 27,000 you will pay this per month, etc. That's just an example. I know there is no wiggle room here.

 

[For The Kids]

Thanks for this BeanE! The couple sentences explain that her 1st hubby's meth addiction/needles and lack of parenting time as reasons for her first divorce. How does someone go from positive to negative is beyond me. What a mess that must have been, certainly explains why 1st hubby gave up his parantal rights. moo mho

Thats if any of it is actually true of course. IMO Terri says whatever suits Terri at that time.

I cant help wondering who actually gets the allowance for J now? If Ecker is paying Tarver the money to look after his own biological son thats crazy. Fair enough he may not have known that J was living with his dad but he would have done for the past two months.

 

[PaulaF513]

It is a percentage of income based on how much you have the child.

Say a Mom has the child 100% of the time and the Dad never has the child. That Dad pays more in child support because the Mom has all the expenses of the child.

A Mom who has the child 60% of the time and the Dad 40% of the time, that Dad pay less child support because when the child is with him, he has expenses for the child.

I never said anything about not having to pay child. I actually said the opposite....if you never see your child, you pay a lot more than someone who does see their child.

You're confusing "joint physical custody" with "visitation". In cases of JPC, yes, the child support would be proportionately adjusted. In cases where 1 parent has full custody and the other has visitation rights, such as weekends or holidays, the custodial parent receives full child support.

 

[eyes4crime]

...It's about respect. You can't just spend money without having a budget for your household. Clearly, Terri was going over budget for some items. That shows a lack of respect for her husband.

I'd like to know what Terri spent wildly on. Certainly not her clothes. They got married on the beaches of Hawaii in their bathing suits, so clothes don't seem like a priority for either one of them. Maybe getting her hair done, styled/cut/colored?

Terri and Kaine belonged to the same gym - so that couldn't be it.

Kaine bought her a Mustang for Mother's Day, so that couldn't be it. Maybe gas money? Lunches?

Vacations were taken together (nice ones at that).

I'm sure a large part of Kaine's salary was used to buy Intel stock,so maybe the fluidity of money was tight. Or do you think Terri was stashing some away? And if so, wouldn't Kaine have noticed that?
All just my opinions

 

[For The Kids]

Eker gained a son - he loved his son. Dad #1 gave up his parental rights because of meth use. IMO everyone gained, especially the Terri's boy. moo

Personally I think if J gained from any of his step fathers it would be from Kaine IMO. He said himself Kaine was like a father to him and it was Kaine who he had lived with the longest.

Long term I disagree that everyone gained. Personally I think Ecker lost out big time. And Terri gained massively..

JMO

 

[For The Kids]

snipped

I'm sure a large part of Kaine's salary was used to buy Intel stock,so maybe the fluidity of money was tight. Or do you think Terri was stashing some away? And if so, wouldn't Kaine have noticed that?
All just my opinions

Lol yep...probably so she could hire someone to kill Kaine...


And with all respect we hear of cases a lot where one half of a couple squirrels money away and then disappears with it so yes it can be done quite easily.
JMO

 

[eyes4crime]

Thats if any of it is actually true of course. IMO Terri says whatever suits Terri at that time.

I cant help wondering who actually gets the allowance for J now? If Ecker is paying Tarver the money to look after his own biological son thats crazy. Fair enough he may not have known that J was living with his dad but he would have done for the past two months.

I'm pretty sure termination of parental rights has to be done through the courts - can't just yell meth use, and it happens. Adoptions in this country rely on the fact that termination of parental rights is permanent. moomho

As human said - the boy has many adults loving him, and that's great! He deserves it! As long as the boy is being cared for and taken care of, I really don't care who is paying who! moo

 

[passionflower]

Ok, 14 pages into this, I'm surprised nobody has brought this up...

What was behind the sudden fanatical interest in body building?

Now, I've known folks who've suddenly "gotten religion" and started eating healthy and heavily working out - but it's usually something like running, cycling - even weight lifting - but not competitive body building.

Did she do it on a bet or a dare? Was it to get Kaine's (or someone else's) attention? To be honest, I don't think that a lot of people find that "look" to be attractive (especially on a woman).

Whatever she was after - it appears that either it was a short term thing (like a bet), or else it did not achieve the desired reaction, because she quickly gave it up.

Was DeDE her friend into body building?? This as year 2005?
Same year as DUI? Met DeDe in 2003? 7 years ago?
But kept DeDe at a distance with kaine? He said DeDe arranged TH 40th birthday, but was only at the house about every 6 months???

 

[tiredblondy]

snipped



Lol yep...probably so she could hire someone to kill Kaine...


And with all respect we hear of cases a lot where one half of a couple squirrels money away and then disappears with it so yes it can be done quite easily.
JMO

LOL I used to write checks at the grocery for much more than the groceries so I could have cash no one knew about...Anywhere from $50 to a $100 more each time, I had a nice little stash going. I worked full time but always felt like that cash was different,like a cookie jar. :innocent:

 

[eyes4crime]

Personally I think if J gained from any of his step fathers it would be from Kaine IMO. He said himself Kaine was like a father to him and it was Kaine who he had lived with the longest.

Long term I disagree that everyone gained. Personally I think Ecker lost out big time. And Terri gained massively..

JMO

Sorry but I'm not into elevating Kaine to the most influential and wonderful daddy of them all. My bet is that J doesn't either. Sounds like all 3 dads have benefited from having J as a son. moo mho

 

[wondering1]

I'm pretty sure termination of parental rights has to be done through the courts - can't just yell meth use, and it happens. Adoptions in this country rely on the fact that termination of parental rights is permanent. moomho

As human said - the boy has many adults loving him, and that's great! He deserves it! As long as the boy is being cared for and taken care of, I really don't care who is paying who! moo

bbm~

yes, but I doubt very much that it was based on TH's allegations. As we've already discussed in connection with th's own decision not to challenge the RO wrt visitation with baby k, courts do not terminate parental rights lightly, and certainly not based just on the alllegations made in a divorce proceeding. Also, even if RT was absolutely guilty as charged, the court would have insisted on putting some kind of plan in place for him to get himself right and re-establish a relationship with the child. imo Only after continuing failures to do so would his parental rights have been terminated. Part of the reason for this is to discourage bio parents from giving up parental rights on purpose to avoid paying child support.

My educated guess is that Tarver voluntarily gave up custody when Ecker agreed to adopt J. The court WILL terminate in that situation.

 

[LisaB]

Yes, exactly. Her father-in-law was planning to buy a boat and she was complaining that he was using up money that would otherwise have gone to her husband after her father-in-law's death.

IMO, it was a joke. I've heard people say that joke so many times. Whenever anyone would say it around my Dad, even if they were saying to his friends, my Dad would always reply "Yep, we cannot take it with us so we have to enjoy it now."

I agree with 1Chump, except that Etilema misquoted the source. Terri complained that her husband's parents were spending HER son's (J****') inheritance, NOT her husband's (THEIR son). That sort of gives the "joke" a different flavor.

 

[kimmera]

According to the article, terri had at least some part of the $250k settlement when she met kaine, as well as $550/mth which served as income for her, along with for a time some unemployment. was that all "theirs" I wonder.

BBM~

I am not directing this at you personally, but I keep seeing this over and over on this thread, that this was HER INCOME. It was NOT her income. It was child support...which is supposed to be for the care of a minor child. This was a teen aged boy, FGS...does anybody really believe that there was anything left of that 550.00/month after providing food, clothing, and shelter to this kid? (And that's not even factoring in little luxuries like school supplies, scouting fees, etc). I raised two boys alone for a number of years and I can assure you that it costs A LOT more to raise a child than 550/month. Child support is supposed to be provided by both parents...it is calculated on the combined income of both parents and each is expected to pay a percentage of what it takes to raise that child. From where I am sitting, TH was providing NOTHING to the support of her own child, only KH and the 'legal' father were. JMO. :furious:

 

[eyes4crime]

BBM~

I am not directing this at you personally, but I keep seeing this over and over on this thread, that this was HER INCOME. It was NOT her income. It was child support...which is supposed to be for the care of a minor child. This was a teen aged boy, FGS...does anybody really believe that there was anything left of that 550.00/month after providing food, clothing, and shelter to this kid? (And that's not even factoring in little luxuries like school supplies, scouting fees, etc). I raised two boys alone for a number of years and I can assure you that it costs A LOT more to raise a child than 550/month. Child support is supposed to be provided by both parents...it is calculated on the combined income of both parents and each is expected to pay a percentage of what it takes to raise that child. From where I am sitting, TH was providing NOTHING to the support of her own child, only KH and the 'legal' father were. JMO. :furious:

BBM

Guess you could ask the same question about Desiree - what was she doing to support her own child. If people are going to use that against Terri, why not to both moms? moo

 

[LisaB]

I'd like to know what Terri spent wildly on.
Terri and Kaine belonged to the same gym - so that couldn't be it.

IIRC Both belonged to the Edge and Terri ALSO belonged to 24-hour fitness.

When I was a SAHM I'd have felt GUILTY indulging in Starbucks, but that's just me.

 

[LisaB]

In January 2002, Horman and Ecker were divorced. She got primary custody of J and the decree included an informal agreement that Ecker would pay about $169 a month in child support.

A year later, Horman went to Washington County authorities, asking for more child support. His payments were bumped up to nearly $550 a month.

Seems the adjustment was due to the court getting involved. They had agreed between themselves to a figure of $169 (based on who-knows-what) and that was stipulated to the court and incorporated into the divorce. It was not based on either of their income or earning potential per se.
Later, Terri went to court and asked for an increase. At that time, based on his income (ability to pay) the amount was increased to $550 by court order.