Found Deceased MA - Zachary Marr, 22, Boston, 13 Feb 2016 #2

  • #241
Basically, I put out some common sense questions with the information I have read, as the story does not fit. Why does a 22 year old, not from the city, take off from his family, after making a phone call? Knowing they are on their way out to meet him? And that your phone is dying. Then walk across town to try to "make a train" when the last one was hours earlier. I'm pretty sure he was aware. You don't come into the big city via commuter rail and not know when the last train out is. And why would the cousins not worry til 10am? When the last you knew was he was waiting outside for you? Sorry, but, I wouldn't have left the area without everyone I came with.
And why's the kid wandering the tracks? Something more seems to have been going on.
<modsnip>
And maybe it's my hope that he just got out, got away. Is safe somewhere and will live a long, happy life, because the situation doesn't make sense.

This has all been discussed a bazillion times.
<modsnip>
I hope they find him soon...
 
  • #242
So, yes, with the windchill at 2 and temperature at 21.2 F on February 13,2016, 1:30 am in the city of Boston, real feel was more around 15 or so degrees. (not confirmed, estimated) That means a person could be outdoors for less than an hour without starting to have frostbite. It was not Sunny and warm! Understood...but not as debilitating as people have been saying, that is all I meant.

Thanks for the info on the dogs...interesting and amazing what animals can do...
As far as the rest of my questions and post, I mean no disrespect of Zach or his family, but in my viewpoint and in my experience, things aren't always as they seem.
It did not seem as he was giving up his smart phone for the burner phone...it was a pure and simple burner phone. with no bells and whistles, a pic of it next to his real phone. Looked like an old flip phone.
I reflect on him possibly taking something from grandma's for a few reasons

1. why he needed to flee before they cleaned out house next day
2. he had been "sitting" in his grandmother's house by himself talking to his father on the phone a few weeks after her death, which was for some reason reported somewhere. (opportunity?)
3. father had alluded to him having "problems in the past" and was begging him home and they could "get past anything" (as if he thought Zach took off)
4. family initially put out bolo reporting he was known to have friends in somerville
5. one of reports said he went out of bar to make phone call
6. he was on his phone in surveillance cam while walking from the area.
7. why would he just ditch his family on a freezing cold night, not wait, like he was running somewhere, or at least away from them?
8. Enough of the pics on his SM show him and friends high, liberally posted, in public view (look at eyes) guessing MJ, not claiming anything else
9. to believe reports, he had 3 drinks that night so his decisions on the night in question do not quite add up
10. If involved in the life, better to disappear than be taken out or go to jail. Where he originally comes from? people are overdosing daily. not implying he uses...this is a stretch...unfortunately I see bad things... Leominster/Fitchburg?
11. Maybe he ran out of options

If you knew anything at all about me, I am anything but cold... what I do and I see everyday in this world is what is cold. And the people, the families, the friends, in so much denial, that could have been there, could have helped. Could have opened their eyes and understood.

I am not here sitting in judgment. I am here with tears in my eyes.
"There but for the Grace of God Go I"
 
  • #243
  • #244
So, yes, with the windchill at 2 and temperature at 21.2 F on February 13,2016, 1:30 am in the city of Boston, real feel was more around 15 or so degrees. (not confirmed, estimated) That means a person could be outdoors for less than an hour without starting to have frostbite. It was not Sunny and warm! Understood...but not as debilitating as people have been saying, that is all I meant.

Thanks for the info on the dogs...interesting and amazing what animals can do...
As far as the rest of my questions and post, I mean no disrespect of Zach or his family, but in my viewpoint and in my experience, things aren't always as they seem.
It did not seem as he was giving up his smart phone for the burner phone...it was a pure and simple burner phone. with no bells and whistles, a pic of it next to his real phone. Looked like an old flip phone.
I reflect on him possibly taking something from grandma's for a few reasons

1. why he needed to flee before they cleaned out house next day
2. he had been "sitting" in his grandmother's house by himself talking to his father on the phone a few weeks after her death, which was for some reason reported somewhere. (opportunity?)
3. father had alluded to him having "problems in the past" and was begging him home and they could "get past anything" (as if he thought Zach took off)
4. family initially put out bolo reporting he was known to have friends in somerville
5. one of reports said he went out of bar to make phone call
6. he was on his phone in surveillance cam while walking from the area.
7. why would he just ditch his family on a freezing cold night, not wait, like he was running somewhere, or at least away from them?
8. Enough of the pics on his SM show him and friends high, liberally posted, in public view (look at eyes) guessing MJ, not claiming anything else
9. to believe reports, he had 3 drinks that night so his decisions on the night in question do not quite add up
10. If involved in the life, better to disappear than be taken out or go to jail. Where he originally comes from? people are overdosing daily. not implying he uses...this is a stretch...unfortunately I see bad things... Leominster/Fitchburg?
11. Maybe he ran out of options

If you knew anything at all about me, I am anything but cold... what I do and I see everyday in this world is what is cold. And the people, the families, the friends, in so much denial, that could have been there, could have helped. Could have opened their eyes and understood.

I am not here sitting in judgment. I am here with tears in my eyes.
"There but for the Grace of God Go I"

Great post thanx! Most of the time the galss half full or empty is determined by the whole picture before it is "determiend"!\\

Grandma:

Marr helped care for her (need to be needed is an important notion of homosapians).

battling breast cancer for 16 years-- in all liklihood he was in the caretaker role at very early age - that is both burdensome while feeling needed. It is a huge life scarring role. He would have been 6 years age when grnadma diagnosed. 6 7 8 9 year old humans are not "designed" to have the emtotionial development to handle such responsiblities.


Big people are suppossed to take care of little people. I saw a lot of real issues when kids were placed in reveresed roles. Primairly alcholic parent, wherein the child ends up being the caretaker (seeing big person passed out/ cleaning vomit/erratic parenting, feeding) I am bringing this angle up to highlight the burden of being in the adult role when one only had the capacity to be the "child" . Tough stuff.

Children need to be taken care of guided, not the other way around. Since there seems to be no mother around, IMO Zach "absorbed" those responsilites. This is not speculation, clearly stated he "cared" for her. Caring for cancer in a loved one for adults is grueling experiance - for a young child very damaging. IMO

&#8220;He called me (recently) to say he was down at his grandma&#8217;s house, just sitting there,&#8217;&#8217; Matt Marr said, noting the death hit his son hard. &#8220;We were by my mother&#8217;s side 24/7 because that&#8217;s what families do.&#8217;

The system was totally focused on grandma. Kids need a spotlight on them (self esteem). Focusing on death since 7 years old is a grim notion. Usually in those situtions everyone elses "needs" take a back seat. For a very young person that is trauma.

On Tuesday, (the 9th of Feb --grandma passed Jan 12) Matt Marr spent time fielding calls, blinking back tears, and accepting warm hugs from neighbors who carried concern and best wishes.

He was very, very close with our grandma,&#8221;

&#8220;They had a special relationship.&#8221;

The family had planned to clean out his grandmother&#8217;s apartment on the Saturday that Zachary went missing

&#8220;It was like a de-stressor to get out

paternal gmo just learned that

Matt Marr said he just wants his son to walk through the door -- no questions asked. IMo, the need to on the air ,hoping he might be listening is a very telling statement. Implication dad pondered at that point if Zach had "left" (split)

just come home. Again at that point in time it appears as if dad had few notions of "harm" - again , seems as if dad primary notion early on was that this a voluntarily leaving. IMO

five classes and the stress of our grandma passing away,&#8221; said Amanda.

he was going to show people just what he could do.&#8217;&#8217;

Prove? When I first heard it I thought self esteems stuff - show prove - as if thus far had felt as a "failure"

just moo

https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2016/02/16/father-worry-his-son-goes-missing/mPCt0RQvnNnZ2mLpLsC9IN/story.html

http://boston.cbslocal.com/2016/02/14/boston-police-missing-man-zachary-marr/
 
  • #245
  • #246
MAYBE the dad and "bio mom" are divorced??? Just a thought.
 
  • #247
Great post thanx! Most of the time the galss half full or empty is determined by the whole picture before it is "determiend"!\\

Grandma:

Marr helped care for her (need to be needed is an important notion of homosapians).

battling breast cancer for 16 years-- in all liklihood he was in the caretaker role at very early age - that is both burdensome while feeling needed. It is a huge life scarring role. He would have been 6 years age when grnadma diagnosed. 6 7 8 9 year old humans are not "designed" to have the emtotionial development to handle such responsiblities.


Big people are suppossed to take care of little people. I saw a lot of real issues when kids were placed in reveresed roles. Primairly alcholic parent, wherein the child ends up being the caretaker (seeing big person passed out/ cleaning vomit/erratic parenting, feeding) I am bringing this angle up to highlight the burden of being in the adult role when one only had the capacity to be the "child" . Tough stuff.

Children need to be taken care of guided, not the other way around. Since there seems to be no mother around, IMO Zach "absorbed" those responsilites. This is not speculation, clearly stated he "cared" for her. Caring for cancer in a loved one for adults is grueling experiance - for a young child very damaging. IMO

&#8220;He called me (recently) to say he was down at his grandma&#8217;s house, just sitting there,&#8217;&#8217; Matt Marr said, noting the death hit his son hard. &#8220;We were by my mother&#8217;s side 24/7 because that&#8217;s what families do.&#8217;

The system was totally focused on grandma. Kids need a spotlight on them (self esteem). Focusing on death since 7 years old is a grim notion. Usually in those situtions everyone elses "needs" take a back seat. For a very young person that is trauma.

On Tuesday, (the 9th of Feb --grandma passed Jan 12) Matt Marr spent time fielding calls, blinking back tears, and accepting warm hugs from neighbors who carried concern and best wishes.

He was very, very close with our grandma,&#8221;

&#8220;They had a special relationship.&#8221;

The family had planned to clean out his grandmother&#8217;s apartment on the Saturday that Zachary went missing

&#8220;It was like a de-stressor to get out

paternal gmo just learned that

Matt Marr said he just wants his son to walk through the door -- no questions asked. IMo, the need to on the air ,hoping he might be listening is a very telling statement. Implication dad pondered at that point if Zach had "left" (split)

just come home. Again at that point in time it appears as if dad had few notions of "harm" - again , seems as if dad primary notion early on was that this a voluntarily leaving. IMO

five classes and the stress of our grandma passing away,&#8221; said Amanda.

he was going to show people just what he could do.&#8217;&#8217;

Prove? When I first heard it I thought self esteems stuff - show prove - as if thus far had felt as a "failure"

just moo

https://www.bostonglobe.com/metro/2016/02/16/father-worry-his-son-goes-missing/mPCt0RQvnNnZ2mLpLsC9IN/story.html

http://boston.cbslocal.com/2016/02/14/boston-police-missing-man-zachary-marr/

BBM

Where are you getting this info?
He was her caretaker from a very young age?
There seems to be no mother around?

My dad passed away recently. My kids were devastated. He was their rock! He was involved in every aspect of their lives. They were all distraught. Still are. That is a normal reaction. They suffered a loss.
 
  • #248
BBM

Where are you getting this info?
He was her caretaker from a very young age?
There seems to be no mother around?

My dad passed away recently. My kids were devastated. He was their rock! He was involved in every aspect of their lives. They were all distraught. Still are. That is a normal reaction. They suffered a loss.



Mom!

He was her caretaker from a very young age? Where are you getting this info?

I will explain:

1.when a family member tells the media Zach took care of his grandma

2. then, when you discover that gma had breast cancer for 16 years

3. If Zach is 22, and gmom was diagnosed 16 years ago

Calculate 22-16=6.

4. then you read that the "family" took care of her 24/7 - "thats what family does" according to dad . Zach is a member of "the "family.

5. Conclusion: Zach was 6 years of age when gma dxed.

7. 6 is young--so one can conclude "since a young age"

8. Cancer has been a component in Zach life since he was a 6 year old child

Is there another conclusion ??

There seems to be no mother around? I have not heard anyone mention her- have any of you??
 
  • #249
I, for one, will not speculate as to the dysfunction of a family that is suffering while awaiting the recovery of their loved one's body.

We have nothing to prove that ZM was the caretaker, that he was burdened with grandma's care since he was a child, that he has no mother, that he had emotional issues...nothing.

Zach is still missing. By All accounts a wonderful guy, son, cousin, friend, employee. Not a bad word on the internet. Nowhere. Not a negative comment. Even anonymously.
 
  • #250
MAYBE the dad and "bio mom" are divorced??? Just a thought.

I gave a whole bunch of options a couple of posts back. The deal here is no "mention". To me it would seem like , in the beginning the media would have asked this question.

A statement that Zachs parents were divorced in XXXX, seems just a part of the who what when where why of the news business.

Who we know dad all the cousins, the gmo, but a mom is missing. That is all I have been saying.

And in a sitution like this that strikes me as odd. Jmoo
 
  • #251
I, for one, will not speculate as to the dysfunction of a family that is suffering while awaiting the recovery of their loved one's body.

We have nothing to prove that ZM was the caretaker, that he was burdened with grandma's care since he was a child, that he has no mother, that he had emotional issues...nothing.

Zach is still missing. By All accounts a wonderful guy, son, cousin, friend, employee. Not a bad word on the internet. Nowhere. Not a negative comment. Even anonymously.

There is nothing bad or negative about having a rough beginning ...........
 
  • #252
There is nothing bad or negative about having a rough beginning ...........

We have nothing to show he had a rough beginning. Or that he was the caretaker for his grandma since a young age. Or that he suffered emotional problems. Or that he was using drugs. Or that he has no mom.

The father has issued a statement that his son's accident was just that. A tragic accident. Good enough for me.
 
  • #253
I, for one, will not speculate as to the dysfunction of a family that is suffering while awaiting the recovery of their loved one's body.

We have nothing to prove that ZM was the caretaker, that he was burdened with grandma's care since he was a child, that he has no mother, that he had emotional issues...nothing.

Zach is still missing. By All accounts a wonderful guy, son, cousin, friend, employee. Not a bad word on the internet. Nowhere. Not a negative comment. Even anonymously.

THIS!

And I don't know of any 6 yr old who is assigned to care for a grandparent with cancer especially when there are adults in the family.

(imo) He likely had hypothermia and confusion, went walking, fell through a hole that was not visible on tracks at night. Tragic.

He was celebrating his birthday at a bar , so he had a few drinks. That seems normal. Does not mean he was an alcoholic or was drunk. (imo)

I hope he is found soon.
 
  • #254
We have nothing to show he had a rough beginning. Or that he was the caretaker for his grandma since a young age. Or that he suffered emotional problems. Or that he was using drugs. Or that he has no mom.

The father has issued a statement that his son's accident was just that. A tragic accident. Good enough for me.

YES.
That is all.
 
  • #255
Basically, I put out some common sense questions with the information I have read, as the story does not fit. Why does a 22 year old, not from the city, take off from his family, after making a phone call? Knowing they are on their way out to meet him? And that your phone is dying. Then walk across town to try to "make a train" when the last one was hours earlier. I'm pretty sure he was aware. You don't come into the big city via commuter rail and not know when the last train out is. And why would the cousins not worry til 10am? When the last you knew was he was waiting outside for you? Sorry, but, I wouldn't have left the area without everyone I came with.
And why's the kid wandering the tracks? Something more seems to have been going on.
I said he "mistakenly took something", to be kind. But there's some red flags here that don't fit. What 22 year old do you know with a burner phone that disappears a few weeks later? What 22 year old do you know who has a burner phone and why do they have it?
And maybe it's my hope that he just got out, got away. Is safe somewhere and will live a long, happy life, because the situation doesn't make sense.

i take a commuter rail train multiples times a week and I don't know what the last train out is on any of the lines...
 
  • #256
Did Zach and his cousins take a train in? And how did the cousins get home? Am I the only one wondering this? Or maybe it's been covered here and I missed it; although I have read the whole thread. TIA.

His parents' divorce (if there was one?) doesn't seen to have any relevance to me. He was a grown man, not 2.

Also it is perfectly normal to feel sad when a grandparent dies. NORMAL.

The poor dude is dead.... on his birthday , no less. I don't want to drag his entire life through the mud. May God help those searchers find his body . Blessings and prayers for the family.
 
  • #257
  • #258
"Extremely cold temperature can also cause hypothermia, when the body's temperature dips below 95 degrees Fahrenheit. Warning signs include uncontrollable shivering, memory loss, disorientation, incoherence, slurred speech, drowsiness, and obvious exhaustion, according to the NWS.
Surprisingly, hypothermia can occur at any temperature lower than normal body temperature. Factors like body fat, age, alcohol consumption, and especially wetness can affect how long hypothermia takes to strike.
If you fall into water, the situation becomes drastically more dangerous."

http://www.businessinsider.com/at-what-temperatures-can-you-get-frostbite-or-hypothermia-2015-2

So at 8 deg. F without a jacket and even moderate alcohol consumption, symptoms can be a factor in an accidental drowning.

:cow:
 
  • #259
Did Zach and his cousins take a train in? And how did the cousins get home? Am I the only one wondering this? Or maybe it's been covered here and I missed it; although I have read the whole thread. TIA.

His parents' divorce (if there was one?) doesn't seen to have any relevance to me. He was a grown man, not 2.

Also it is perfectly normal to feel sad when a grandparent dies. NORMAL.

The poor dude is dead.... on his birthday , no less. I don't want to drag his entire life through the mud. May God help those searchers find his body . Blessings and prayers for the family.

His Birthday was on the 11th, they waited till the weekend to celebrate. It's a small thing maybe, but I find it a bit comforting that he didn't die on the exact same day he was born. They can still celebrate his Birthday as such.
 
  • #260
His Birthday was on the 11th, they waited till the weekend to celebrate. It's a small thing, maybe but I find it a bit comforting that he didn't die on the exact same day he was born. They can still celebrate his Birthday as such.

Small comfort I suppose. But was missing for Valentine's Day :(
 

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