Beautifully said. I have two sons, (now adults) matter of fact my youngest son (22) and I attend the same college, (lol - different majors/classes and he's the one who actually encouraged me to attend there) and I frequently have students come up to me and ask if he is my son and tell me how highly they think of him. (guys & gals alike) They tell me that I did a good job raising him (and my other son as well for those that know him also) and it still amazes me that they (young adults) always want to know "how I did it?" Although, I admit it, I am extremely proud of both of my sons, I don't gloat in it and I don't take all of the credit for it either. My first response is "I have really been blessed" and I tell these kids (lol - young adults) that there are many parents who love thier kids more then life itself and they do a great job parenting but as kids get older they still ultimately must make thier own choices such as drugs, drinking, sex, etc... and most kids will try new things at one time or another but some, what I call, never make it back. I was raised in a very rigid home, there were only two options, perfect or complete failure. Once a child is cast into a mold its hard to step out of that mold therefore I always told my kids that there is always a way back, that making a mistake isn't the end of the road and theres always an exit where you can turn around and get back on and head back in the right direction. What each of my sons have achieved personally in thier lives is "thier achievement", its not mine. I hear so many parents use the term "you owe me" with their kids simply because they parented a child, who didn't ask to come into this world, for the 18 years that they are legally responsible to do so, how can that be right? Anyhow, my point is when we make our kids "trophy kids", "reflections of ourselves" or treat them like objects by using them as bragging points to compete against other family member's or friend's for mother or father of the year award, we don't give them a way back. We give them a road that only goes in one direction, it has no exits, no off-ramps and ultimately leads them right over a cliff.