CatFancier
Former Member
- Joined
- May 20, 2011
- Messages
- 7,931
- Reaction score
- 173
I have loved sleuthing for years. I love the people I have come to know and the cases I have worked. I also care a great deal about this case, and I am/have been involved on two of the fb groups.
It saddens me to see that people within both groups don't see that they are really mirror images of or complimenting partners of each other. Think of a well run police department where law enforcement officers and staff are divided into departments working on a similar case. The detectives interview a spouse concerning his/her spouse who went missing. They gather all pertinent info, and they ask the hard questions. They have to. Statistics tell them it is the wisest choice.
Let's say the spouse is cleared or is at least not a poi or suspect. The detectives don't interview the spouse for all to see, and they generally don't publicize the tough questions and the spouse's responses in writing or on video unless or until the person becomes a poi. They investigate professionally and discretely so as to not compromise the integrity of the investigation and for other reasons.
In the victim's advocate department, the spouse may seek support. The spouse may be given additional resources to help him/her through this most difficult time. This should be a place where the spouse should be able to feel supported and safe. Say the spouse cried all day and feels the walls are falling down with tears of grief. It should be a place where he/she shouldn't have to answer questions, especially the tough ones. There is a place for that. This is not the place.
Concerning the Robert Mayer Search Group, at first there was one page. Although it was meant for support and the sharing of info to find Rob, it was criticized for its name because it included the word, "search." It was an innocent mistake. I was involved in SAR for many years, and had I named the page I might have done the same thing. In any case, in hindsight maybe two pages should have been created--one private where Ida could go for support and to help with fliers and info sharing, and one public page for all to see and join while helping to spread the word. That was done today. A little late, but with a true and good motive.
The other page? Well I can't go there. I can't go there because i don't want to violate TOS, and well--I just can't go there. lol
That leaves the wonderful posters here. You folks are the detectives. There are some seasoned, spot on detectives here that could be beneficial in helping solve this.
I think sleuthing has its place, and that is here. And, support and the spreading of info has its place and it is there. Same cause, different departments. I am a member of both, and I must be ever mindful of how I conduct myself so as not to jeopardize the investigation, and equally as important, so I don't hurt anyone unnecessarily.
Excellent post Relay. For us sleuthing and hoping to find RM, we believed the Search part of the title. It is really amazing to have over 2,000 members and yet have absolutely no details at all.
I think it's great that this huge number of people joined. I just wish those who wanted to actually help and not support were sent somewhere appropriate to actually help find him. If 2,000 people spent that much time trying to find him, I think he'd be located by now.