OH - Cecilia Nesselroad-Slaby, 2, dies in hot car, Batavia, 23 Aug 2007

[southcitymom]

the sad thing is we shouldnt have to wait for the weather to cool off for this to stop happening.

Probably the closest thing I heard that might work is some type of alarm on the car seat that would go off if the car was turned off and a child was still in the seat. That would certainly be a back-up plan to prevent these accidents rooted in human failure.

 

[AmandaBrown23]

That actually is a good idea.

 

[LNL]

Why was the mother in Batavia moving her SUV all day? That is a very odd case.

my guess is that she didn't have child care arrangements that day and that she was keeping the child in the car and checking on her throughout the day. Maybe she moved the car into the shade at one point. I'd call that child abuse. She should have been charged. IMO

 

[narlacat]

http://www.foxnews.com/story/0,2933,295808,00.html


The article claims that the father who was out of town usually dropped the child off at day care.

I just do not understand how someone can forget their child.

Unbelievable.

This is ridiculous- some people shouldn't have kids.

 

[Bellgardin]

Why was the mother in Batavia moving her SUV all day? That is a very odd case.

I live in this area and this case has been all over our news. Especially since the prosecutor has decided NOT to file charges!! Even though she had been warned about leaving the child in her car previously---2 of those times in August, 2 days in a row!!! She left her child in the car on August 21st and the 22nd. On the 21st, it was 84 degrees. On the 22nd, it was 100 degrees! Those 2 days alone should allow her to be charged for child endangerment or something!

Not to mention that according to the video on the news, she walked right past the door where her child was in the car seat. Right past it!!!

I'm stunned by the lack of at least some kind of charge in this case!

 

[angelmom]

I live in this area and this case has been all over our news. Especially since the prosecutor has decided NOT to file charges!! Even though she had been warned about leaving the child in her car previously---2 of those times in August, 2 days in a row!!! She left her child in the car on August 21st and the 22nd. On the 21st, it was 84 degrees. On the 22nd, it was 100 degrees! Those 2 days alone should allow her to be charged for child endangerment or something!

Not to mention that according to the video on the news, she walked right past the door where her child was in the car seat. Right past it!!!

I'm stunned by the lack of at least some kind of charge in this case!

I agree. Generally I try to be sympathetic in the cases that truly seem like bizarre accidents (the pediatrician comes to mind), but this sounds like gross negligence. I cannot believe this woman was not charged.

I think it sounds like the Atlanta mom who left her child in the car while she went to work b/c she couldn't get a sitter. I felt for her situation, but that isn't a good reason to kill your child. I know she was charged.

 

[EZRA]

Just to put my 2 cents in here - I hate to read these stories and feel that most cases should bring charges, however, when I had my 5th son and he was only a few weeks old I picked my kids up from school and came home. Getting everyone out of the car and backpacks and things was so hectic that I completely forgot and left the baby in the car. Now it was only for a few minutes until I realized what I had done but it was because I totally wasn't used to getting a baby out of the car again. BUT I did forget him and I completely will never forgive myself for it. I've always been one to check the car seats everytime I get out of the car even when the kids have already been dropped off at their respective places, but for some reason that time I just did not remember that I had to get him out of the car. I counted heads and the fact that I was missing the new one did not occur to me for about 5 minutes. It was so scary and I felt so bad. I don't even know how to describe it. I know he had no idea and thankfully it was March but I'm one of those horrible mothers now who forgot their child. So even though I hate these stories I can't stand in judgement of these parents anymore. I've never done it again and once again I'm back to counting the right number of heads, I guess it just took a bit for my brain to register that the number was now 5 instead of 4. I know I should not joke about it but it still kills me that I did that and it was now 2 years ago.

 

[southcitymom]

Just to put my 2 cents in here - I hate to read these stories and feel that most cases should bring charges, however, when I had my 5th son and he was only a few weeks old I picked my kids up from school and came home. Getting everyone out of the car and backpacks and things was so hectic that I completely forgot and left the baby in the car. Now it was only for a few minutes until I realized what I had done but it was because I totally wasn't used to getting a baby out of the car again. BUT I did forget him and I completely will never forgive myself for it. I've always been one to check the car seats everytime I get out of the car even when the kids have already been dropped off at their respective places, but for some reason that time I just did not remember that I had to get him out of the car. I counted heads and the fact that I was missing the new one did not occur to me for about 5 minutes. It was so scary and I felt so bad. I don't even know how to describe it. I know he had no idea and thankfully it was March but I'm one of those horrible mothers now who forgot their child. So even though I hate these stories I can't stand in judgement of these parents anymore. I've never done it again and once again I'm back to counting the right number of heads, I guess it just took a bit for my brain to register that the number was now 5 instead of 4. I know I should not joke about it but it still kills me that I did that and it was now 2 years ago.

Ezra,

Thanks for sharing your honest experience and I hope you have forgiven yourself for this oversight. Most mothers have a tale or two like this. I know I do. I've never left a child in a car, but I've done some flaky things that could have ended traumatically.

There but for the grace of God go all of us.

 

[Brefie]

Just to put my 2 cents in here - I hate to read these stories and feel that most cases should bring charges, however, when I had my 5th son and he was only a few weeks old I picked my kids up from school and came home. Getting everyone out of the car and backpacks and things was so hectic that I completely forgot and left the baby in the car. Now it was only for a few minutes until I realized what I had done but it was because I totally wasn't used to getting a baby out of the car again. BUT I did forget him and I completely will never forgive myself for it. I've always been one to check the car seats everytime I get out of the car even when the kids have already been dropped off at their respective places, but for some reason that time I just did not remember that I had to get him out of the car. I counted heads and the fact that I was missing the new one did not occur to me for about 5 minutes. It was so scary and I felt so bad. I don't even know how to describe it. I know he had no idea and thankfully it was March but I'm one of those horrible mothers now who forgot their child. So even though I hate these stories I can't stand in judgement of these parents anymore. I've never done it again and once again I'm back to counting the right number of heads, I guess it just took a bit for my brain to register that the number was now 5 instead of 4. I know I should not joke about it but it still kills me that I did that and it was now 2 years ago.

Ezra...this is the whole reason why I could give one of these parents a pass. Now, mostly it is a parent who only had ONE thing (li'l person) to get out of the car, but even so, having no children of my own, I can only imagine what is on a parent's mind and how a perfectly loving parent can have a ton on their mind. FIVE children? I cannot even imagine what I am sure I would forget.

I left my dog in the car for about a minute. I got out and walked towards the apt building where my neighbors had complained about the barking (he was a teeny pup and had flown 2 hours when we adopted him...they barely gave him a chance to adjust). Anyhow, I was muttering about my awful neighbors and how dare they complain about my....poor....little....puppy...who....is.....
CRAP!!! Still in the car!!! I hadn't even made it into the building, but I smothered him with way too much lurve and forgiveness for being a bratty li'l pup for about 2 weeks

Not the same as a child, I know...but when u don't have any, this is as close as you can get.

Forgive yourself, please

 

[Amraann]

The two examples the two of you posted were mere minutes ...
Not criminal, NOT neglect, NOT the death of someone or creature you love.

HUGE difference!!

Neither of you left the house again or took a nap... Neither of you went back to said vehicle and STILLLL did not recall.

Neither of you remembered the donuts for the office meeting but not your baby nor had a history of forgetting your child in the car.

 

[AmandaBrown23]

I myself am guilty of leaving my daughter in the car, but it was only once and for a few minutes. I was devastated. She as asleep and my other kids got out the car and I had stuff to bring in, I came in and sat down and boom it hit me. Thats why I cant for the life of me understand how these mothers and fathers and whoever else do this. I am the most forgetful person ever!

 

[sherri79]

The two examples the two of you posted were mere minutes ...
Not criminal, NOT neglect, NOT the death of someone or creature you love.

HUGE difference!!

Neither of you left the house again or took a nap... Neither of you went back to said vehicle and STILLLL did not recall.

Neither of you remembered the donuts for the office meeting but not your baby nor had a history of forgetting your child in the car.

i'm not shocked by these stories. i'm a mom and i can understand your brain not working for a minute. if i listed everything a mom has to keep going on in her head the forum would not let me post due to length. a mother fails her child for 1 moment and it scares and shocks her. what i can not understand is how a mom goes hours without thinking of her child. how can a mom not stop and think about her child at least once in a day? i would be calling to check on my child but i'm not asking for that from these parents. just stop at some point and think about the small person you gave life to. i'm sure this has happened to hundreds of good parents and we never hear the story. for a moment they get distracted and do something stupid. then they think of their child and it hits them. no police report and no news story. the child is not harmed because the parent only blanked for a minute. how do you blank for 8 hours?

 

[EZRA]

Thanks guys for your kind words....no I haven't forgiven myself but I too often wondered how you could go hours now wondering about your child. During the day I do these kind of inventory counts (sounds funny I know) who is where and even call to be sure to check up on them. The school and daycare laugh when I call..."yes, they are here and fine" I just can't help myself, I need to check periodically to be sure everyone is where they are supposed to be! Even when I only had 2 I did this! So the fact that these parents go hours without realizing where their kids are amazes me. Especially that lady who went out and moved her car 5 times that is just crazy that her daughter was in the car. Didn't the child make any noise during one of those trips to the car? Well, thank you again for your kind words....I guess if that is the biggest mistake I make as a parent I'm in good shape! I'm sure it won't be! Take care everyone!

Ezra

 

[GlitchWizard]

God's honest truth is that EVERY parent has had a situation where their child COULD have been hurt or killed. Due to the fact that it didn't happen, the parent never realizes it COULD have. Think of every parent who has purchased a skateboard and allowed their kid to actually use it. Trampolines, as well. Or fell asleep while their kid was awake - ANYTHING could happen, then. Or the girls in Perry Florida the other day that drove a golf cart into an oncoming truck. Or the parents who move next door to a pedofile and never checked the registry about the addresses. Or who have both a fork and an electrical outlet within reach of their toddler. Again, just because nothing happens to our kids, doesn't mean we are always viligent and perfect. Those who think "I NEVER put my kid in harm's way" need a reality check. Harm is there, whether we recognize it and beat ourselves up about it, or not recognize it and look at everyone ELSE in 20/20 hindsight and blame them.

Quick memory:
I saw a young woman carrying her infant many years ago. She very nearly dropped the baby on the floor of the store. She maneuvered just right and the baby never actually fell, but the look on her face as she nervously looked around to see if anyone saw her near-accident was interesting. We made eye contact and I thought she was going to pass out! I said "It happens to the best of us" and gestured toward my then toddler.

It's true. It does.

Just to put my 2 cents in here - I hate to read these stories and feel that most cases should bring charges, however, when I had my 5th son and he was only a few weeks old I picked my kids up from school and came home. Getting everyone out of the car and backpacks and things was so hectic that I completely forgot and left the baby in the car. Now it was only for a few minutes until I realized what I had done but it was because I totally wasn't used to getting a baby out of the car again. BUT I did forget him and I completely will never forgive myself for it. I've always been one to check the car seats everytime I get out of the car even when the kids have already been dropped off at their respective places, but for some reason that time I just did not remember that I had to get him out of the car. I counted heads and the fact that I was missing the new one did not occur to me for about 5 minutes. It was so scary and I felt so bad. I don't even know how to describe it. I know he had no idea and thankfully it was March but I'm one of those horrible mothers now who forgot their child. So even though I hate these stories I can't stand in judgement of these parents anymore. I've never done it again and once again I'm back to counting the right number of heads, I guess it just took a bit for my brain to register that the number was now 5 instead of 4. I know I should not joke about it but it still kills me that I did that and it was now 2 years ago.

 

[angelmom]

God's honest truth is that EVERY parent has had a situation where their child COULD have been hurt or killed. Due to the fact that it didn't happen, the parent never realizes it COULD have. Think of every parent who has purchased a skateboard and allowed their kid to actually use it. Trampolines, as well. Or fell asleep while their kid was awake - ANYTHING could happen, then. Or the girls in Perry Florida the other day that drove a golf cart into an oncoming truck. Or the parents who move next door to a pedofile and never checked the registry about the addresses. Or who have both a fork and an electrical outlet within reach of their toddler. Again, just because nothing happens to our kids, doesn't mean we are always viligent and perfect. Those who think "I NEVER put my kid in harm's way" need a reality check. Harm is there, whether we recognize it and beat ourselves up about it, or not recognize it and look at everyone ELSE in 20/20 hindsight and blame them.

Glitch, you are right that we all have our moments, and that few people recognize them when they happen. That is why most people think I'm paranoid about my kids' safety, and I just think I'm careful. BUT, I do think there is a line where you SHOULD know the risks. Everyone has to go to sleep at night...passing out drunk in the middle of the day while a wide-awake toddler explores the house is a different ballgame. And while I have sympathy for the dad who is out of his normal routine and forgets to bring a sleeping, rear-facing infant to daycare, I am having a harder time with this mom who had been warned multiple times before and was in and out of her car, passing right by the DRIVER's SIDE door where her sleeping 2 YEAR OLD was restrained.

 

[GlitchWizard]

Glitch, you are right that we all have our moments, and that few people recognize them when they happen. That is why most people think I'm paranoid about my kids' safety, and I just think I'm careful. BUT, I do think there is a line where you SHOULD know the risks. Everyone has to go to sleep at night...passing out drunk in the middle of the day while a wide-awake toddler explores the house is a different ballgame. And while I have sympathy for the dad who is out of his normal routine and forgets to bring a sleeping, rear-facing infant to daycare, I am having a harder time with this mom who had been warned multiple times before and was in and out of her car, passing right by the DRIVER's SIDE door where her sleeping 2 YEAR OLD was restrained.

Once when my daughter was an infant, it was bitter cold (below zero) in Indiana and there was no "full service". I locked my car, walked maybe all of ten feet to give the gas station guy my cash. A policeman was on the other side of the pumps and he yelled at me to ask me if my car door was locked. I said it was - he said "kids get kidnapped so fast." (He had just recently worked a case and it was on his mind.)

I was SHAKEN. I know it was a moment, and I know my car was locked and it was fifteen feet and less than a minute and I had "done nothing wrong" - but he was right and I never did that again, even if it took longer to get her out of the car than to run and pay.

I can't see how ONCE YOU ARE WARNED, that you can rationalize doing it again.

We all make mistakes, but I should have clarified and said "BUT NOT THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE."

 

[angelmom]

Once when my daughter was an infant, it was bitter cold (below zero) in Indiana and there was no "full service". I locked my car, walked maybe all of ten feet to give the gas station guy my cash. A policeman was on the other side of the pumps and he yelled at me to ask me if my car door was locked. I said it was - he said "kids get kidnapped so fast." (He had just recently worked a case and it was on his mind.)

I was SHAKEN. I know it was a moment, and I know my car was locked and it was fifteen feet and less than a minute and I had "done nothing wrong" - but he was right and I never did that again, even if it took longer to get her out of the car than to run and pay.

I can't see how ONCE YOU ARE WARNED, that you can rationalize doing it again.

We all make mistakes, but I should have clarified and said "BUT NOT THE SAME MISTAKE TWICE."

Exactly. I think that may be what bothers me most. The close calls I've had are the things I am most careful about.