I encourage you not to give up. You'll get approved, mark my word. I fully understand the hesitancy of DHS to make certain that foster families have "staying power" as they don't want to put a lot of energy and work into your family to have you move out of state on them. Also, they are careful to make sure that a family has an appropriate level of support for just the reasons we've been speaking. We don't want most adoptive or foster foster families to 100% depend on their assistance. There are some, who are very specialized (we were one) who did and yet it's a dicey situation. We always had a construction business but to be perfectly honest, we got too big way too fast.
The phone calls kept coming and we couldn't say no. We ended up having 7 adoptive placements in about 18 months. Thank goodness we had a strong marriage, great older kids, and a wonderful support system or we would have fallen flat. It was hard. But we never isolated ourselves. We tapped into every possible resource. We whole-heartedly embraced the "it takes a village" philosophy.
I adore each of my children but did we take a risk and live a life on the edge? Yes. Could it have crumpled? Yes. In fact, it did. Through no fault of our own, our children were raped. The cumulative effect of having eight special needs children who were all traumatized by recent sexual abuse all in the same home was horrendously hard. I honestly don't know how we made it through those dark days. Talk about footprints in the sand.
Once again, the sheer strength of our family's love triumphed and we made it through but it still takes a toll. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. It's not for the faint of heart. One child at a time. Go slow. See how it works. Accept help. Stay humble. Know your limits. Savor the moments. Celebrate the successes. Revel in the healing process.
My children are my most precious gifts. It's the greatest honor imaginable to be the mother of 14 incredible people. Each one has had a hand in making me the woman I am today.
The phone calls kept coming and we couldn't say no. We ended up having 7 adoptive placements in about 18 months. Thank goodness we had a strong marriage, great older kids, and a wonderful support system or we would have fallen flat. It was hard. But we never isolated ourselves. We tapped into every possible resource. We whole-heartedly embraced the "it takes a village" philosophy.
I adore each of my children but did we take a risk and live a life on the edge? Yes. Could it have crumpled? Yes. In fact, it did. Through no fault of our own, our children were raped. The cumulative effect of having eight special needs children who were all traumatized by recent sexual abuse all in the same home was horrendously hard. I honestly don't know how we made it through those dark days. Talk about footprints in the sand.
Once again, the sheer strength of our family's love triumphed and we made it through but it still takes a toll. I wouldn't recommend it to anyone. It's not for the faint of heart. One child at a time. Go slow. See how it works. Accept help. Stay humble. Know your limits. Savor the moments. Celebrate the successes. Revel in the healing process.
My children are my most precious gifts. It's the greatest honor imaginable to be the mother of 14 incredible people. Each one has had a hand in making me the woman I am today.
