YESorNO
The Queen (aka "mrsmuir") SWBB
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SIDEBAR #19- Arias/Alexander forum
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daisymae
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Hi, sis :seeya:
I am not a nut (I'm just a little crazy- :facepalm. You are the one who eats all those boiled peanuts :floorlaugh:
So we are All a little crazy? Same difference!
YESorNO
The Queen (aka "mrsmuir") SWBB
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Evening, Zuri :seeya:
And who is Chrisman (I read Christmas first :scared: and thought it was a little too early for a Christmas Forum :floorlaugh
. I know I heard that name, but with all the murderers, I get confused. :scared:
Zuri
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Evening, Zuri :seeya:
And who is Chrisman (I read Christmas first :scared: and thought it was a little too early for a Christmas Forum :floorlaugh
I know I heard that name, but with all the murderers, I get confused. :scared:
The cop who shot an unarmed Hispanic man and his partner testified against him. Juan is trying the case. Jury has it and I will be amazed if a guilty verdict is rendered. The judge is biased IMO towards the defense and it is blatant. JMV
Zuri
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My son in Florida lent his car that is not paid for to a friend. The friend rear ended a Tahoe and totaled his Lancer. The kid is fine, the Tahoe driver was fine. And now I have to come up with money I don't have. Life is a beach isn't it?
daisymae
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Haven't seen her today - she's probably at job #2.
daisymae
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daisymae
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:floorlaugh: :floorlaugh:
YESorNO
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Isn't That Precious
Two informally dressed ladies happened to start up a conversation during an endless wait in the LAX airport.
The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man.
The second was a well mannered elderly woman from the South.
When the conversation centered on whether they had any children, the California woman started by saying, "When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me."
The lady from the South commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman continued, "When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes-Benz..
Again, the lady from the South commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman continued boasting, "Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet.
Yet again, the Southern lady commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman then asked her companion, "What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?"
"My husband sent me to charm school," declared the Southern lady.
"Charm school?" the first woman cried, "Oh, my God! What on earth for?"
The Southern lady responded, "Well for example, instead of saying "Who gives a *****?" I learned to say, "Well, isn't that precious"...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An old man, Mr.. Wallace, was living in a nursing home.
One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed.
Nurse Tracy asked him if there was anything wrong.
'Yes, Nurse Tracy ,' said Mr. Wallace.
'My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.'
Knowing her patients were a little forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Wallace. Please accept my condolences.'
The following day, Mr. Wallace was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas.
He met Nurse Tracy. 'Mr. Wallace,' she said, 'You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas.'
'But, Nurse Tracy I can't,' replied Mr. Wallace. 'I told you yesterday that my Private Part died.'
'Yes,' said Nurse Tracy , 'you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?'
'Well,' he replied, 'Today is the viewing.'
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Husband takes the Wife to a disco.
There's a guy on the dance floor giving it large - break dancing, moon walking, back flips, the works.
The wife turns to her husband and says: "See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to me and I turned him down."
Husband says: "Looks like he's still celebrating!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Divorce
An old man in Miami calls up his son in New York and says, "Listen, your mother and I are getting divorced.
Forty-five years of misery is enough."
"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.
We can't stand the sight of each other any longer, he says.
"I'm sick of her face, and I'm sick of talking about this, so call your sister in Chicago and tell her," and he hangs up.
Now, the son is worried. So he calls up his sister.
She says, "Like hell theyre getting divorced!" and calls her father immediately.
"Youre not getting divorced! Don't do another thing, the two of us are flying home tomorrow to talk about this.
Until then, don't call a lawyer, don't file a paper, DO YOU HEAR ME? and she hangs up.
The old man turns to his wife and says -
"Okay, theyre coming for Christmas and paying their own airfares..
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Devoted Husband
Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian"
He stumbles into the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee, and the morning newspaper all waiting for him. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son... what happened last night?"
"Well, you came home after three in the morning, drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you threw-up in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."
Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"
His son replies, "Oh THAT! Well, Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone, I'm married!'"
Two informally dressed ladies happened to start up a conversation during an endless wait in the LAX airport.
The first lady was an arrogant California woman married to a wealthy man.
The second was a well mannered elderly woman from the South.
When the conversation centered on whether they had any children, the California woman started by saying, "When my first child was born, my husband built a beautiful mansion for me."
The lady from the South commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman continued, "When my second child was born, my husband bought me a beautiful Mercedes-Benz..
Again, the lady from the South commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman continued boasting, "Then, when my third child was born, my husband bought me this exquisite diamond bracelet.
Yet again, the Southern lady commented, "Well, isn't that precious?"
The first woman then asked her companion, "What did your husband buy for you when you had your first child?"
"My husband sent me to charm school," declared the Southern lady.
"Charm school?" the first woman cried, "Oh, my God! What on earth for?"
The Southern lady responded, "Well for example, instead of saying "Who gives a *****?" I learned to say, "Well, isn't that precious"...
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
An old man, Mr.. Wallace, was living in a nursing home.
One day he appeared to be very sad and depressed.
Nurse Tracy asked him if there was anything wrong.
'Yes, Nurse Tracy ,' said Mr. Wallace.
'My Private Part died today, and I am very sad.'
Knowing her patients were a little forgetful and sometimes a little crazy, she replied, 'Oh, I'm so sorry, Mr. Wallace. Please accept my condolences.'
The following day, Mr. Wallace was walking down the hall with his Private Part hanging out of his pajamas.
He met Nurse Tracy. 'Mr. Wallace,' she said, 'You shouldn't be walking down the hall like that. Please put your Private Part back inside your pajamas.'
'But, Nurse Tracy I can't,' replied Mr. Wallace. 'I told you yesterday that my Private Part died.'
'Yes,' said Nurse Tracy , 'you did tell me that, but why is it hanging out of your pajamas?'
'Well,' he replied, 'Today is the viewing.'
-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Husband takes the Wife to a disco.
There's a guy on the dance floor giving it large - break dancing, moon walking, back flips, the works.
The wife turns to her husband and says: "See that guy? 25 years ago he proposed to me and I turned him down."
Husband says: "Looks like he's still celebrating!!!
--------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
The Divorce
An old man in Miami calls up his son in New York and says, "Listen, your mother and I are getting divorced.
Forty-five years of misery is enough."
"Dad, what are you talking about?" the son screams.
We can't stand the sight of each other any longer, he says.
"I'm sick of her face, and I'm sick of talking about this, so call your sister in Chicago and tell her," and he hangs up.
Now, the son is worried. So he calls up his sister.
She says, "Like hell theyre getting divorced!" and calls her father immediately.
"Youre not getting divorced! Don't do another thing, the two of us are flying home tomorrow to talk about this.
Until then, don't call a lawyer, don't file a paper, DO YOU HEAR ME? and she hangs up.
The old man turns to his wife and says -
"Okay, theyre coming for Christmas and paying their own airfares..
---------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------
Devoted Husband
Jack wakes up with a huge hangover after attending his company's Christmas Party. Jack is not normally a drinker, but the drinks didn't taste like alcohol at all. He didn't even remember how he got home from the party. As bad as he was feeling, he wondered if he did something wrong.
Jack had to force himself to open his eyes, and the first thing he sees is a couple of aspirins next to a glass of water on the side table. And, next to them, a single red rose! Jack sits up and sees his clothing in front of him, all clean and pressed. He looks around the room and sees that it is in perfect order, spotlessly clean. So is the rest of the house.
He takes the aspirins, cringes when he sees a huge black eye staring back at him in the bathroom mirror. Then he notices a note hanging on the corner of the mirror written in red with little hearts on it and a kiss mark from his wife in lipstick: "Honey, breakfast is on the stove, I left early to get groceries to make your favorite dinner tonight. I love you, darling! Love, Jillian"
He stumbles into the kitchen and sure enough, there is a hot breakfast, steaming hot coffee, and the morning newspaper all waiting for him. His son is also at the table, eating. Jack asks, "Son... what happened last night?"
"Well, you came home after three in the morning, drunk and out of your mind. You fell over the coffee table and broke it, and then you threw-up in the hallway, and got that black eye when you ran into the door."
Confused, he asked his son, "So, why is everything in such perfect order and so clean? I have a rose, and breakfast is on the table waiting for me?"
His son replies, "Oh THAT! Well, Mom dragged you to the bedroom, and when she tried to take your pants off, you screamed, 'Leave me alone, I'm married!'"
daisymae
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The jury is out? Let me know when the verdict is in. Is it live anywhere?
YESorNO
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cguru: :blowkiss:
Zuri
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There are you tube videos IIRC and some of it was live streamed. Mainly it was trial by tweet.
Zuri
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Why so soon?
daisymae
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Frasier is on and she has the hots for Martin :floorlaugh::floorlaugh:
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